“Just like that. You have access to that kind of money.”
He shrugs. “My brother’s spent more than that in a single night playing cards in Vegas.”
My eyes are wide. “Seriously?”
“Yup.”
“This isn’t just about the money,” I tell him.
He eyes me. “That’s exactly what it’s about. I just need to figure out how much it will cost for you not to leave me.”
I shake my head. “It’s not just the money.” My voice sounds small and raw. I don’t even know any more if it’s the truth or a lie. It started out just being about the money. I never expected to feel anything. Now it’s like I feel everything.
He crosses his arms over his chest. “Someone like you would never give someone like me the time of day if it wasn’t for the money. I’m smart, remember. Not that it takes a genius to figure that out.”
“What does that mean?” I snap a little too abruptly. He’s making me sound like a complete whore and I really don’t like it.
He frowns like I’ve just asked the stupidest question in the entire world. “You’re absolutely gorgeous. A total knockout. When you walk into a room every guy’s eyes are on you wondering if you’ll even talk to him. I saw the way Dr. Madden looked at you. That’s the way all guys look at you. Holding their breath waiting and wondering if they’ll be the chosen one.”
Before I can protest he continues. “I know I’m a geek. The mirror doesn’t lie and that’s who I see staring back at me every morning. I’m the nerd who couldn’t get a date to senior prom. Until my dad threatened the CFO of one of his companies with his job unless his daughter agreed to go with me. When she asked me to prom I was stupid enough to believe she actually liked me. And when she agreed to have sex with me after the prom I thought I was king of the world. Here was this cute girl who actually wanted to spend time with me and who wanted to be with me. For the first time in my life I actually felt normal. Then after we had sex she told me that the only reason she fucked me—her words not mine—was because she didn’t want her dad to lose his job. She said my father threatened her dad and their family was scared. She told me if her dad lost his job that she wouldn’t be able to go away to Stanford.”
He does his best to blink away the moisture in his eyes. “You can’t tell me this isn’t about the money when the only girl who ever had sex with me before you only did it so her dad wouldn’t lose his job and so she could go away to college.”
My throat feels so tight I’m not sure I can even speak. I try to swallow, but even that gets stuck.
“How much do you want?” He sounds desperate. “Just tell me how much it will cost for you not to leave me.”
Now I’m the one blinking back tears. I’m not completely surprised by his lack of experience, but I’m shocked by the circumstances of his one sexual encounter before we met. How could his dad have done something like that? And how could that girl have told him?
My heart breaks into tiny pieces when I look at him. He’s already given me three hundred thousand dollars. That would take four years to earn at my current salary. And he’s willing to give me more—as much as I want—as much as I could ask for—just so I won’t leave him.
Not that I want to. If I’m honest with myself I’m starting to have real feelings for him.
“We’re going to have to be extremely discreet and very careful,” I warn. “No one at the university can know what’s going on between us.”
He pulls me into his arms and holds me for several long moments. “I would never do anything to hurt you.”
“Okay.”
He places a soft kiss on my lips that leaves me tingly all over. Then he whispers in my ear. “Do you have any idea how badly I want you right now?”
“I have an idea.” I can feel his erection pressing against me.
He crushes his lips into mine reclaiming me with his mouth.
“Don’t you have to get back to Andrew? He thinks you’re in the bathroom. It normally doesn’t take that long.”
He straightens my sapphire pendant. It got a little knocked out of place when we were kissing. “Think about me today.”
“I will.” It would be impossible not to.
“Good.”
When he exits my office I fall back down into my chair. I have no idea how our arrangement is possibly going to work now, but I feel like I’m in too deep to escape.
***
Right after my first class Misty finds me outside my office. Her eyes go wide when she catches sight of my sapphire necklace.
“Wow,” she blurts then catches herself. “Sorry, but that sapphire is absolutely amazing. Sapphire beautiful.” She recites the stanza from Dante’s Divine Comedy.
“Was there something you needed to see me about?” I try to change the subject.
She seems fixated on my pendant. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen a piece that stunning. My grandfather owned a jewelry shop. I spent a lot of time there. The stone is nearly flawless. And the diamonds are of exceptional quality as well. It’s worth about twelve thousand. That’s not even retail.”
I gulp. I knew the pendant was valuable, but I had no idea it cost that much.
“I hope that wasn’t rude,” she says. “I tend to talk first and think later.”
“It’s okay. Was there something you needed help with?”
“I met the department’s new graduate research fellow. Dante McNally.”
My chest tightens at the mention of his name.
“He told me he’s working on a textbook with Dr. Madden. It’s a fantastic opportunity. I was just wondering if maybe you had some research I could assist with. I don’t expect to get paid. I just really want that experience. I realize I’m not quite Dante’s caliber. He’s absolutely brilliant, but I feel like I can make a contribution.”
Before I even have a chance to reply she reaches into her backpack and removes a packet.
“My vitae. I don’t have much on there yet. Obviously. But I did do some research as an undergraduate. And I have a few conference presentations. I’ve also included the Abstract of my Honor’s Thesis. I know my credentials aren’t as impressive as Dante’s. He’s already been published as an undergraduate, but I’m very eager and willing to work on whatever research assignments you have.”
Dante’s already been published? How do I not know that about him? And how come she does? And she thinks he’s absolutely brilliant.
I feel a twinge of jealously and hate myself for it.
Luckily Misty isn’t paying too much attention to my reactions. She’s still talking. “If you give me this opportunity I won’t let you down. I promise.”
She removes another packet from her backpack. “I’ve already found the answer to every one of the questions I had. The ones you said I’d get extra credit for.”
I take the packet from her. It’s substantial. As I flip through the document she seems to have written at least a page in response to every one of her questions.
“This is great,” I tell her. “Let me give your proposal some consideration and I’ll get back to you later in the week. How does that sound?”
“Thank you so much, Dr. Pine. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate you even considering me to assist with your research.”
After she hurries down the hallway I’m just about ready to duck in my office for a breather when Andrew makes his way towards me carrying two cans of soda. He hands me one and pops open the other for himself.
“You look like you can use some sugar and caffeine.”
“You have no idea,” I tell him. “Thanks.”
“Anything for you.” When his eyes catch mine I can see that he’s a lot more serious than I’d like him to be.
Why now? I wonder. Why has be accelerated his interest towards me now when I can’t reciprocate?
“Am I too late?” He stares at the pendant around my neck.
“A little,” I tell him.
“After everything that happened with Doug I was ju
st trying to give you some time and space.”
I nod.
“I guess I should have seized the opportunity before the window shut. Whoever he is, he’s a lucky man.”
“It’s complicated,” I tell him.
“I’m not.” When our eyes meet there’s a little bit of electricity exchanged between us that I’ve never felt before. “If you ever want to simplify things you know where to find me.”
When Andrew turns and walks away I notice Dante standing at the other end of the hallway. He had been watching us.
We both stare at each other for a long moment. I think he might walk down the hallway to say something to me, instead he turns and walks away.
Complicated is quickly verging toward challenging and problematic.
***
By the time I make it home I’m utterly and completely exhausted. The last time I had a day this emotional was when the police informed me that Doug had shot himself.
After I get changed I log into my account with The Club and stare at the amount. It’s almost surreal. Three hundred thousand dollars. I quickly transfer the money into my bank account. Then I send a quick email to the mortgage company requesting a pay-out amount for the mortgage.
It’s odd that I haven’t heard from Dante yet. And then it occurs to me that he didn’t tell me he was coming over tonight. He’s come over every night since we met.
I grab the cell phone he gave me and send him a quick text.
Me: Will I see you tonight?
It only takes a few seconds for me to get a response.
Dante: I have to study.
What does he have to study? I know for a fact that Andrew doesn’t give exams this early in the semester.
I’m surprised that I actually feel hurt. Maybe he’s having second thoughts about being with me now that he knows I’m a professor and that we’re in the same department.
He did see me having a rather intimate moment with Andrew.
And now he has a cute little fan club named Misty.
That’s when it truly hits me that this is no longer about the money. He’s given me enough to pay off my mortgage and get caught up on all of my bills. If he ended things right this minute I wouldn’t actually need the money. He’s already given me what I need.
But I still want to see him. I want to be with him. And I’m sad that he doesn’t want to be here with me tonight.
When I text back a quick, “Okay,” I’m not expecting anything in response. But I get an immediate reply.
Dante: I’ll see you tomorrow at eight.
Eight
“If one more person tells me how wonderful and brilliant Silver Spoon is I’m going to barf,” Lucy says as we head off campus. “Literally. The next person who mentions the name Dante McNally will have my vomit all over him or her.”
Another busy day. Another day of Andrew throwing himself at me, this time with fresh squeezed lemonade. I still have no idea where he got it, but it was good. Another day of Misty begging me to allow to her to do research. What’s that expression?
Same shit different day.
It seems to be the story of my life.
The only difference was that I didn’t see Dante at all. I didn’t run into him in the hallway. I didn’t see him in passing. No sign of him anywhere.
But that didn’t stop everyone from talking about him. And telling me he’s absolutely brilliant.
“Like he’s the first person in our department to ever publish research as an undergraduate,” she continues. “You published research as an undergrad.”
“I was fortunate to get a research internship as an undergraduate, and was lucky that my professor listed me as a co-author.”
She eyes me. “My point is that the kid isn’t as fantastic as everyone says he is.”
I cringe when she calls him the kid. It makes me wonder how she’d react if she knew I was fucking him.
“Don’t you think he’s kind of a weird geek?” she asks.
“You know for someone you don’t want to hear about, you’re sure talking about him a lot.”
“He kind of gives me the creeps.”
“Why?” I ask. “He seems like a nice person.”
“He’s really intense. And he doesn’t smile. That’s not normal.”
I know a few things that make him smile. “Tell him a joke,” I offer.
She rolls her eyes at me. “I tried that. He didn’t even crack a smile.”
“Maybe your joke wasn’t funny. Ever think about that?”
“Much ado about nothing,” she fires back. “Is it wrong that I want to see him get knocked down a few pegs?”
I gulp. We’d both get knocked down a few pegs if anyone ever found out about our arrangement. I guess I won’t be telling my best friend about my new lover any time soon.
***
As I stare at myself in the mirror I can’t believe I’m feeling nervous. It’s not that Dante and I haven’t been together before, but we haven’t been together since we found out the truth about each other.
Will it make a difference?
Even though nothing happened with Andrew and nothing will, I still felt uncomfortable when Dante saw Andrew hitting on me.
I had no idea Dante was already so accomplished at such a young age. And apparently brilliant according to multiple sources.
I took a little extra time getting ready for him tonight. I put on some make-up and curled my hair a bit. And I’m wearing some sexy undergarments under my tight fitting little black dress.
When there’s a knock on the door I take in a deep breath and try to calm my nerves.
Dante’s wearing another Polo shirt and jeans. He looks good. A lot less nerdy. He shoves his hands deep into his pockets as he looks me up and down.
“You look amazing.”
“Thanks.”
I move out of the way so he can enter.
“You’re the talk of the department,” I tell him. Might as well address the elephant in the room right away. “I had no idea you were already published.”
He gives a quick nod.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
He shrugs. “I didn’t realize it would mean something to you. You never told me you were a medieval scholar.”
“Fair enough.”
“So...what were you studying last night?” I ask.
“Nothing for school,” he says dismissively.
When I frown he sighs.
“Fine, I’ll tell you. I was doing extensive research on oral reciprocation. It’s a subject that’s well covered on the internet.”
It takes a moment for me to remember the conversation we had about oral sex after the blow job debacle. I cringe.
When he pulls me into his arms I finally release the tension I’d been holding. I guess I wasn’t sure things would be the same between us. But his erection pressing against me lets me know that things will most likely be the same, maybe even better, especially if he’s been doing research on oral sex.
Dante kisses me like he’s starving. Is it bad that I’m happy that he wants me so much?
“You’re mine,” he whispers into my ear. “Don’t ever forget that.”
“I won’t,” I assure him.
When he looks into my eyes he doesn’t seem convinced.
“Is everything okay?” I ask.
He bites his bottom lip as if he’s giving it some thought. Then he says, “I know he’s your colleague and you have to work together, but Dr. Madden wants more.”
I nod. “I know.”
Dante places his hand on my cheek. “He can’t have you.”
“I know that. He knows that too. He doesn’t know who, but I did tell him I’m involved with someone.”
“Good.”
Before I can stop myself I say, “Misty McDonald seems very fond of you.”
He tilts his head and frowns. “What?”
“I realize our exclusive arrangement only applies to me...”
He holds up a hand. “Wait just a minu
te. Do you think I want to be with anyone else but you?”
I shrug. “You could.”
He shakes his head. “I’m not like that. I don’t want Misty or anyone else.” He touches the pendant he gave me. “This means something.”
My throat tightens. “It means that I’m yours. You never said you were mine. There’s a difference.”
“Do you want me to be? Yours?”
I feel like a lion that’s suddenly found itself trapped in the back of a cage. I’m the one who brought the subject up. I have to respond. Do I really want Dante to be mine?
I nod.
“Tell me. I want you to say the words.”
“I want you to be mine.”
He pushes me against the wall and kisses me hard and hungrily until we’re both breathless. “Let’s go upstairs,” he whispers eagerly.
He grabs my hand and pulls me with him as he bounds up the stairs. He wastes no time taking off my dress. “Wow,” he mouths as he checks out the sexy black lace bra and panties underneath. After a few moments of taking me in he says, “As much as I love these, they have to go.”
After he unclasps my bra and removes it he slides my panties off. He takes off his own clothes just as quickly. He’s already rock hard and I feel myself start to get wet just thinking about having him inside of me again.
When he kisses me again I allow his tongue to roam my mouth.
His eyes are filled with so much desire my entire body heats in response.
“Now for the oral reciprocation,” he teases.
He guides me to the bed and pulls me with him. As we look at each for a few long moments there’s so much energy exchanged between us we could probably light up the neighborhood for a week.
Then he eases my legs apart and climbs between them kissing his way up my inner thigh and sending a wave of shivers right through me.
When he moves his tongue between my legs I let out a low moan. It’s been a long time since I’ve had any oral reciprocation and I almost forgot how good it feels.
Dante’s research definitely paid off. He takes his time licking and sucking my clit. Sliding his tongue in and out of me until I’m close to climaxing.
“Don’t come yet,” he warns as he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand.
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