The bullets have landed in my Kevlar, two shiny smashed expelled metal bunches wedged in the material. I laugh a strangled kind of sound, and Reno slaps my cheek.
"Lucky as shit, Man," he says. Pulling me to my feet, I try to give a reassuring smile to my friend as Timmons comes over the radio that the helicopters are coming in. "Better say your prayers tonight, Bro," he chides as we make our way back downstairs to inspect the warehouse.
"Yeah, I better," is all I can get out, that lump of fear still present in my throat. It is the closest I've been to being hurt. I feel like I am about to piss my pants. You know that whole cliché thing of, 'having your life flash before your eyes', when you’re faced with death? Well, it just happened up there.
And it scared me to fucking death. I need to see my Rhea. I need to hear her voice. I need to get home.
Most of all, I can't die because I have to protect my brothers.
~~~~~~~~~
Rhea
"Ray, where's your butter?" I can hear Brad yell from the kitchen as I set out glasses and paper plates on the coffee table in the living room. It is Saturday night, and instead of cooking dinner for my friends, Kendall and Harlan are bringing pizza. We are going to do popcorn and a movie after, because the guys want to watch a UFC fight while we eat.
"It's in the drawer with the cheese," I say as I come around the doorway and see him pull out the container.
Brad has everything for the popcorn set out on the counter, ready to make when the fight ends. He and I are becoming close, and at times, I feel as if Brad is filling the hole in my heart left by my brother Randy's death. He's witty and charming, using his killer smile to win arguments just like Randy used to. I appreciate all Brad has done for me, and I hope, one day, I can do something to pay him back.
I didn’t realize that I am leaning against the island, staring at Brad until he asks, "You okay, Ray?" snapping me from my musing. I can feel the blush on my cheeks and Brad grins at me. "You were thinkin' ‘bout me naked weren't ya, Ray?" he jokes.
"Oh yeah," I add sarcastically, slapping him on the shoulder as I come around the island. My growing belly bumps his hip lightly and it makes the baby shift; the fluttering feeling stopping me in my tracks. "Whoa," I say and Brad throws his hands to my hips, concern on his face.
"What's wrong? Do I need to get my bag?" He is always ready to help someone who needs it, and being an EMT is quite handy when I have silly questions, but I just shake my head and move his right hand from my hip to my belly so he can feel the craziness going on in there. "Wow," he says quietly, a smile crossing his face. His hazel eyes seem to twinkle as I look at them, half hidden behind those thick dark lashes that I would kill for.
"Crazy, right?" I say, letting the amazement of this movement of my child fill my voice. It is still weird to think that I am going to be a mother, but the crib, bassinet, and painted walls upstairs bring me back to reality that yes, it is happening.
I had been to a doctor’s appointment yesterday afternoon with Rosa, and we had a tearful moment, listening to the heartbeat and seeing her baby move around on the screen. I held her hand the entire time, and when the doctor told her that she is having a girl, we both looked at each other and bawled like little girls.
I am so happy for her; I can't even put it into words. We were so happy when we left her doctor’s office that when we got into her car and she broke down, sobbing sorrow filled tears, it shocked me. She told me that with every day that passes and she doesn't hear from Reno, she fears the worst. She wants him to be home, to be with her for all of these moments, and I told her that I feel the same way. I held her from the passenger seat as she leaned over and sobbed into my shirt, telling her that our men will be home soon, that they're thinking of us every second they can and she stopped, rubbing her reddened eyes and kissing me on the cheek. I didn't want to leave her, but her mother and grandmother were waiting at her condo, reassuring me that they were staying with her. I had texted her this morning, and she said she is feeling much better, which makes me smile.
Kendall and Harlan arrive with the pizza, followed not too far behind by Garth, and I giggle like a school girl when he kneels in front of me, pressing his lips to my belly through my tank and says, "Hello in there," making a fake echo sound a second later.
Garth is getting to be a jokester, and I slap him on the shoulder as Brad embraces him, kissing him heartily as Kendall and I razz them. "Oh you want some, momma?" Garth grins as he releases Brad's lips, and I know that evil look in his eyes, so I squeal and turn to get away fast.
I can hear his sneakers squeak on the hardwood behind me as I go around the island in the kitchen, laughing wildly as I reach the table and turn to face him at the other side. I'm already sort of out of breath, both from laughing and hustling this extra weight around and I wag my finger at Garth.
"Don't you dare, mister!" He just gives me a smirk that would make anyone's nerves light up in excitement and he dashes toward me, wrapping his strong arms around my waist before I can get more than five feet from the table, and pulling me back against his chest while spinning me around.
His hold is gentle as he has my stomach between us, but I still can't squirm away, and I start to giggle uncontrollably as I hear him smacking his lips. "Give me some suga', momma," he says before putting his hands on my cheeks and pulling my face to his, slobbering a kiss on my lips.
I can hear Brad and Harlan cheering him on as Kendall laughs, the giggles still rolling through my chest, muffled behind my tightly closed lips. "Ah, momma," Garth mumbles against my lips as he drags his tongue over my face, making me frown at his slobbering, "you make me hard."
"Yuck!" I screech, pushing him back so that he bumps into the table; his laugh filling the kitchen. "Garth Cobb, I'm gonna kick your ass," I say through a laugh as I wipe his slobber off my cheek. This is the second time he has done this to me, but it makes me almost pee my pants laughing every time. Brad wraps me in a hug and kisses my cheek before slapping his boyfriend on the butt and kissing him silly.
"We're a bunch of crazies, ya know?” Kendall says as she throws her arm around my shoulder, kissing my cheek.
"I know, but I love y’all the same," I say, hugging her waist.
The guys start to fight over the pizza and wings and I have to call a game of rock, paper, scissors; Harlan winning the right to the BBQ wings over Brad, paper over rock. The three of them hunker down on the couch, flicking Chad's flat screen to the UFC fight as Kendall and I take our plates into the downstairs bedroom so she can look at the clothes I've bought.
I've only done a little shopping because I still don't know what gender the baby is. It seems like he or she knows when Doc Young is trying to get a look, because he or she will flip over every time. I'm thinking it's going to be a boy, only because of the amount of men on Chad's side of the family. His father was one of seven boys, and before that his grandfather was the youngest of ten boys, so I'm pretty sure it's a good chance of being a boy.
"You've gotten so many yellow and green things," Kendall says, giving me a pouty face as she holds up a cute duck onesie.
Cocking my head to side, I watch my friend go through the onesies and pants sets that I have stored in their shopping bags on the bed. Her blonde hair is curled and pulled back in a ponytail, her tan fresh and perfect, along with her French manicure. She looks a little sad as she pulls out yet another yellow outfit.
"What's wrong, Ken?" I say, sitting next to her on the bed.
"I just want you to have a girl so we can spoil her and take her to get her nails done." She giggles through a tear sliding down her cheek, and I throw my arm around her waist, pulling her into my side. She leans her head on my shoulder and sighs.
"There's always next time," I say, and after a second we both start to giggle. "If I don't kill Chad while I'm in labor for this one," I add, and we laugh a little harder, getting Garth to come to the door, checking on us. We shoo him away by throwing some of the stuffed animals I've purchased at him, and then
I turn back to my best friend, saying, "I'm really nervous."
"I know, Ray," she says, kissing my temple and I see that her eyes are still a little red from tears. "But I'll be there for ya, and Dana will be there; and Rosa. We'll all make sure you get through it if Chad isn't back in time."
I nod my head and lean on her shoulder, gushing over the last few items she pulls out of the bags. She follows me up the stairs as I take the bags into the room we've painted and set the crib up in. The small bedroom is right next to the master bedroom and it looks cute and homey with its apricot colored walls and zoo animal wall decals all over the place.
Taking the items out of the bags, we start to put them in the dresser drawers when Harlan yells up, "Ray, your phone's goin' off with some sorta blue thing flashin'."
I know it is the Skype logo, and my heart starts to race.
"Answer it; it's Chad! I'll be down in a second." I chuck the onesies I have in my hand into the dresser and head out into the hall, careful not to go too fast on the stairs because I've already almost fallen three times this week. I can hear the three guys joining in a rowdy "Hey Chad," as Kendall and I hit the hardwood, and I can't help but jog the rest of the way.
Bumping my hip into Garth, I reach up to snag my phone from Harlan's outstretched hand, and I see him. My man, there on the screen; smiling. Damn does he look good, and I almost let out a whimper of attraction at the sight of him.
"Hey baby girl," he says, grinning at me. His dimples are showing through his scruffy looking beard.
"Baby, I miss you," I say quietly, moving myself into the spare bedroom where Kendall and I had grabbed the clothes. "Are things okay? I haven't heard from you in a while."
"Yeah, everything's okay." He smiles, but I can tell he wants to tell me something, so I wait, quietly. "Okay, okay," he says, giving into my silent pushing. "I got shot twice, in my vest, but I'm okay." He says it hurriedly, but I gasp all the same, my hand going to my chest, trying to grip at my heart.
"Twice," I say as a few tears slip down my cheek and I see him frown. "Are you sure you're okay?" My voice hitches and the tears pick up their pace.
He got shot. He could have died! The weight of the situation hits me like a ton of bricks, making my chest feel heavy. My breathing picks up the pace to the point where I think I might hyperventilate.
"Calm down, Baby," Chad says, and I can see him try and get closer to the computer screen. "Breathe. I'm okay; only two bruises, I swear. See, look." I see him lift his shirt to reveal two, baseball size purple bruises. "Calm down, Lover."
I close my eyes and just listen to his voice, the soothing deep tone, the way it seems to curl around my name when he says it. "Open those pretty eyes, Rhea."
"When are you coming home?" I ask, the emotion still heavy in my voice. His face changes from calm and caring, to concerned in a split second, and it makes the tears roll down again. "When Chad?" I cry, knowing that the answer won't be September like I want. He runs his hand over his chin as I wipe at my wet cheeks.
"Baby," he huffs, shaking his head and continuing, "they pushed it back to October."
That dam that I had built up with its cracks, explodes inside of me and I loudly sob, thinking of how Rosa must feel. I lay down hard on the bed, keeping the phone close to my face as Chad tries to soothe me, but I'm not listening. I'm too absorbed with the thought of giving birth alone and if I can be strong enough for Rosa, since now she is going to be without Reno.
"Baby, please, stop crying." I hear the hurt in Chad's voice and I wipe my eyes, finally seeing that he is crying, too. He has his elbow on the desk in front of him and his chin is resting in his palm. I run my finger over my phone's screen, the want to touch him making my heart hurt more. My big strong solider is crying.
"Reno is going to miss his daughter being born," I say, wiping at my face and sniffling.
"I know; he's upset. He’s still talkin' to Rosa on the other screen they gave us." His strong hands rub over his face, and I wish I was one of those tears running down his bearded cheek, just to be close to him; to feel his touch.
"Let me see how big you’re gettin',” he whispers and smiles. I try to smile back, but I know it’s strained. Still lying on my side, I hold the phone up above me, angling it so that he can see the profile of my stomach.
"Wow," he says, and I snort at the look on his face. He looks like a child standing in line at Disney World, his grin reaching his ears. "Wow, Baby, I'm so proud of you. Everything's good?" I nod, and he chuckles, rubbing his face. "Boy or girl?"
"Your stubborn child won't let the doctor see," I say with a half scolding tone, and Chad laughs. The sound of it pulls at my heart strings, making a few more tears slide down my cheeks. "I think it's a boy," I say, and he makes a humming noise, shaking his head.
"Probably," he agrees with a smile. I can see the sadness written all over his features and I hold my phone to my forehead, closing my eyes. "I miss you so much, Rhea," he whispers and I open my eyes to see that he's doing the same, his forehead closest to the webcam. "I can't wait ‘till I'm home. I can't wait to hold you in my arms." A buzzer goes off in the background behind him and my heart jumps. "Baby, put the phone to your belly."
I lift the phone from my forehead and give him a weird look, but he just nods, so I do it. Putting the phone up to my baby bump, just below my belly button I lay there and hear him clear his throat. What he says next, I’m not prepared for.
"Little one, I'm your daddy and I love you more than you'll ever know." His words break my heart and my hand shakes as I try to wipe the fresh tears from my cheek. "I'm trying my hardest to get home to you and your momma, so please, try and wait ‘till I'm there to meet the world. I know you can hear me, so the rules start now." I can't help but laugh at his failed attempt at sounding authoritative at this moment. "Little one, if I don't come back, you gotta promise me that you'll take care of your momma, because she loves you, just like I love you."
I can't believe he just said that. I sob his name, the power of it wracking my body, and it makes me shake all over. "Rhea, Rhea I love you," he says, and I bring the phone back up to look at my man's handsome face.
"I love you, too, Chad,” I choke out. I feel like I did on the day of deployment, like my heart is being ripped out.
"I'll be seeing you, Baby," he says, blowing a kiss at the screen and winking. I can tell he's holding his emotions in as he rubs his hand over his face and through his hair.
I kiss the screen of my phone. "I'll be seeing you," I whisper, giving him a genuine smile to hold onto right before the screen goes blank. With the empty Skype screen before me I start to lose it, my breathing becoming labored and the tears flow like Niagara Falls. I clutch the phone to my chest and scream out for my best friend, the strangled version of her name echoing through the house as she slams her way into the bedroom.
She throws herself down beside me, and I sink into her familiar embrace, snuggling my tear streaked face into her neck and sobbing uncontrollably. Kendall asks me what is wrong, and between sobs, sniffles, and choking sounds I get out the gist of Chad and Reno not coming home until October, ending it with a whining whimper and she pulls me closer; running her fingers through my hair, trying to soothe me. I hear the door open again, and then Brad's hushed voice reaches me. Feeling his weight on the mattress and his arms sweeping around from the back, encircling both Kendall and I, makes the hurt ebb from my heart.
The three of us lay there for what seems like hours, the sunlight disappearing completely, casting the room in darkness, leaving only the light from the living room coming through the slightly open door. I am lightly dozing on Brad's shoulder when my phone starts to play a loud Mariachi band song; Rosa's ring-tone. I fumble with it as Brad and Kendall both sit up. "Rosa, are you okay?" I answer, slight worry filling my heart.
"Rhea, can I come to your house? I need some time with you and Kendall." Her voice is weak and strained, and I can tell she's been crying; like me.
"Of course, when did you wa
nna get here?" The drive to her house takes about an hour and a half and I don't want her driving that at night.
"I'll come by tomorrow morning and go to church with you and Dana." I can hear her sniffle, and it makes me clench my chest to try and stay the pain. I tell her to text me when she leaves her condo in the morning and I say goodbye, hanging up and letting a few more tears run down my cheek.
"He got shot," I say, sitting up on the bed with my back against the headboard, snuggled tight between Brad and Kendall's sides. They both give me an open-mouthed look and I nod, wiping at my cheeks. "Two in the vest, his bruises are baseball sized,” Kendall and Brad each grab one of my hands, and I lean my head on Brad's muscular shoulder.
"It'll be okay, Ray," he says, kissing the top of my head.
"Yeah, he'll be back before the little guy here meets us." Kendall rubs her hand over my belly and I smile, placing my hand over hers and holding it there. "Maybe by then we'll know for sure whether this little one is indeed a guy or girl. Preferably a girl, but I won't complain either way.” I can't help but giggle at her, and the three of us snuggle closer together, separating only when Harlan comes to tell us the popcorn and movie are ready to be enjoyed.
I suck up the pain. I suck up the hurt in my heart and join my friends in the living room of my home. No, our home. The Payne household, I tell myself. So he'll come home late, he's still coming home. That's what we want, and after that he'll be ours every day and every night.
And I'll be all his, just like I always have been.
CHAPTER NINE:
August 19, 2012
Rhea
I am so glad today isn’t as hot as it has been; it is only about eighty-two today rather than the triple digits it's been the last week. Today is our baby shower, Rosa and I are decked out in cute sundresses and 'Mother-To-Be' sashes, saying hello to everyone as they filter into the large white tent that is set up in the field behind my house. There are four long tables, set end to end at the back of the tent, holding all of the food and two large sheet cakes; and the guys who had helped set up the tent are already hovering over them.
Coming Home: Book 2 The Wakefield Romance Series Page 10