Instead she reached for his hand, interlaced her fingers with his and squeezed for all she was worth.
❄ ❄ ❄
Caleb could feel her weakening beneath him. He felt her resistance, but she wouldn’t fight. Like a helpless mammal pinned to the floor by its predator, she almost seemed resolute.
Either she had given up hope or she was so confident she could fight him at the Brink, she wanted to get there. Because there they would be equal. At the Brink there would be no question of physical strength or prowess; it would only be the strength of her soul versus his shadow. One would consume the other. Only one would survive. And she must have thought she stood a chance or she would have been fighting him.
He drank harder. He had to. Even amidst the all-consuming taste of her, he could feel something else in him rejecting it – rejecting taking her. Something instinctive was pulling him back and he had a suspicion of what it was. But he couldn’t afford to feel that way. He would not let himself feel that way.
In less than two days she was turning him into something he didn’t recognise. He was a survivor, always had been, and she was stripping him of it. She had buried deep, seeping her poison into his system, making him see the things she wanted him to see. But not anymore.
He drank harder and faster.
He needed to end it. He needed to end his developing feelings for her. The way she made him feel. He needed to end it there.
He felt the sheen of perspiration in her palm as she grabbed his hand, as she squeezed her fingers between his.
She was fading and she was fading fast.
❄ ❄ ❄
Pain was rife in his chest as Jake bounded up the protruding steps, the rain chilling his face, dampening his shirt.
He’d lost one brother to a serryn – he wouldn’t lose another. He couldn’t lose another.
It would be all his fault. All of it.
He stumbled up the next set of steps as he took the sharp left up onto the roof. He missed the top step, his knees cracking against concrete, but he was back on his feet a split second later.
He scanned the roof just in case, but he knew where they were.
He lunged at the door, slammed his hand against the glass door in a hope that it would startle his brother into stopping whilst he keyed in the code.
He yanked the door open and burst inside.
He came to an abrupt halt a couple of feet away from the bed.
His attention fell to Leila as she lay on her back, her skin ashen, her limbs limp, her head turned away from him so he couldn’t see her face.
Caleb lay next to her, his body lax, one arm above his head as he gazed unflinching up at Blackthorn’s sky.
Jake’s slow-beating heart pumped hard as his brother remained perfectly still, didn’t even look up at him.
His chest ached, only the smattering of the rain disturbing the otherwise deathly silence.
Alisha had been wrong. Over and over he kept saying it in his head. Alisha had been wrong.
It had happened.
Caleb had taken Leila to the Brink and he had won.
His stomach knotted, a sense of fear washing over him. Had his brother even come back the same? Why didn’t he look at him? Why didn’t he even acknowledge him?
He didn’t think he’d do it. Deep down, he didn’t think Caleb was capable of doing it. He had seen the way Caleb had looked at Leila. And part of him had hoped Leila would appeal to that part of Caleb he loved so much. That Caleb, more than anyone he knew, who defended those he loved vehemently. A loyalty that couldn’t be broken.
‘Caleb,’ he whispered, almost fearful to say his name.
Maybe he wasn’t back yet. Maybe this was how it was whilst they fought at the Brink – suspended animation back in their worlds.
Maybe the battle was still happening.
He crouched down, maintaining a safe distance. ‘Caleb?’
And as Caleb’s eyes snapped to his, Jake flinched and recoiled.
Chapter Thirty
‘You scared the shit out of me, Caleb.’ Jake sank onto the steps and rested his head in his hands. ‘Fuck,’ he hissed. ‘My heart’s still pounding. I thought it was all over for you. I swear I’ve never moved so fast in my life. I grazed my knee,’ Jake declared, pointing at where his impact with the top of the steps had scuffed his jeans, the blood seeping through. ‘When was the last time I grazed anything? When was the last time I fell over?’
Caleb eased up onto his elbows as Jake’s attention switched to rolling up his jeans leg to inspect his wound. ‘What the hell were you doing tearing up here? I told you to stay away.’
Jake rolled his jeans back down and rested his elbows on his thighs. ‘What happened?’ he asked, indicating towards Leila, her breathing resounding in the silence.
Caleb sat up more fully and leaned back on his palms. Staring ahead through the glass at the district beyond, he could feel his brother’s eyes burning into him. ‘I lost focus for a moment. That’s all.’
‘Lost focus?’
Meeting the scepticism in Jake’s eyes, Caleb sighed with impatience and got to his feet.
‘You stopped yourself,’ Jake said as Caleb turned his back on him to make his way up the steps. ‘You pulled back.’
Caleb stopped in front of the glass and gazed out at the darkness.
‘You couldn’t do it, could you?’ Jake added.
He’d been so close – seconds away, where draining just a little more blood would have meant she would have been beyond recovery anyway. Where she would have died in his arms regardless.
But something in the warmth of her body, something in the way she had interlaced her fingers with his had stopped him. Where the prospect of being without her was unbearable enough for him not to care, just for that moment, about the implications.
Something that had warned him losing her would unleash an even greater darkness inside him.
‘I had a moment’s lapse, that’s all. And that’s all it’s going to be. As soon as she’s conscious, I’ll finish it.’
‘You can’t be serious,’ Jake said. He hurried around the circumference of the steps to join his brother. ‘Caleb, the fact you stopped must tell you something.’
‘Yes – that I made a mistake. It was a moment of weakness I will not allow myself again.’
‘It was a moment of weakness because you feel something for her.’
‘You know me better than that,’ he said, looking back ahead.
‘Exactly. Better than anyone. So deny it. Deny you feel anything for her.’
Caleb’s gaze locked on his brother’s, the seconds grating by. ‘And what if I do? What am I supposed to do, Jake? Turn my back on everyone out there?’ he asked, sweeping his hand towards the window. ‘For what? To keep her here? Because I’d have no choice. I can’t let her go – not now she knows about me. And I can’t keep her in the dungeon or locked in my room for the next fifty years. But that’s the life she’d have. I am not losing you to her, Jake. I am not going through with you what I went through with Seth. I will protect you with my last breath. One way or another I am going to lose her. At least this way I get something out of it.’ He looked back towards the glass again. ‘We all deserve to get something out of it.’
‘And what if she feels the same way?’ Jake asked. ‘What if she feels something for you, Caleb?’
Caleb glanced across at him again. Even hearing it from his lips made him uneasy. ‘She’s a serryn, Jake.’
‘What if she’s not?’
The jolt of Caleb’s heart was equivalent to being given an electric shock. His gaze snapped back to his brother’s.
Jake’s eyes fixed on his. For a moment he didn’t move. For a moment he didn’t say anything. ‘It’s why I came tearing up here. She might not be a serryn anymore, Caleb. She might have lost it.’
His chest tightened. He stared down at the bed to where she lay before he looked back at Jake. ‘What are you talking about?’
‘They don’t just lose it through suici
de, Caleb. It’s the ultimate serryn treachery – falling in love with a vampire.’
‘Who told you that?’
‘Alisha.’
Caleb exhaled curtly, turned back to the windows, his hands low on his hips. ‘I’ve never heard of it. They’re stalling.’
But something niggled – something deep and unsettling and uncomfortable.
‘Leila wasn’t the one who told Alisha, Sophie did,’ Jake said. ‘She’s quite the serryn expert apparently. She isn’t just here in Blackthorn to hunt vampires. She wanted a serryn on side and resolved the best place to find one would be the heart of vampire territory. She told Alisha everything she knew, including what happens if serryns commit the ultimate sacrilege.’
Caleb stared at his own reflection. His chest clenched.
Leila had tried to seduce him – first in the shower and then there in that very room. Tried to seduce him once she worked out he wasn’t going to back down.
She tried to have sex with him because she needed to have sex with him.
Leila loved him.
Or she thought she did. And sex was consummation. The girl had been hedging her bets. She was taking him down whatever it took. She either killed him with her last drop of blood or faced him at the Brink.
And she would have succeeded if the thought of killing her hadn’t torn at his heart. The prospect of losing her unthinkable. Of draining the life from her.
Because when he’d felt her slide her fingers through his in those last moments, he knew he couldn’t be the one to do it. Whatever the consequences, whatever the fallout, he couldn’t forsake her.
And all that time she had prepared to die and had prepared to take him with her.
Her behaviour hadn’t been uncharacteristic of her – it had been totally Leila.
‘If what you’re telling me is true, she just tried to kill me,’ Caleb said, dragging his gaze back to his brother.
Jake’s eyes widened in shock, then despondency. ‘What?’
‘She tried to sleep with me, Jake. She wanted to lose it. She wanted to kill me. Does that sound like love to you?’
‘You know it’s not as simple as that. She had no choice. It was you or her sisters. You or the fate of her entire kind. You put her in an impossible situation without any reason to believe in any other outcome than her dying anyway. You cornered her and she came out fighting the only way she could. Exactly as you would. Don’t tell me you don’t admire her for that.’
‘Clearly you do.’
‘There’s only one thing that would have stopped you doing this and you need to face that. I know what you’re thinking, but this is not you letting Seth down, Caleb. This is not you letting me down. If you go ahead, you’re never coming back from it and you know it. You kill her, and I will lose you again. And this time it could be for good.’
‘She said nothing. She let me bite her and said nothing.’
‘You don’t believe it, do you? You don’t think she’s capable of caring for you. You don’t believe anyone other than me is capable of caring for you. Get proof. It’s too dangerous for you not to now.’ He grabbed his brother’s arm. ‘But Caleb, whatever the outcome of this test, if what you’re saying is right, then she does feel something for you. And if she has fallen for you despite everything, you need to wake up and see what you’ve got here. You betray her and you’ll never get over it. If there’s Leila, there are others. We’ll find one. We’ll see this through another way.’
‘If that test proves she’s lost it, the chances are it has jumped to Sophie, or if we’re too late, to Alisha. Are you willing to face that?’
‘You wouldn’t do that to me.’
Caleb held his gaze steadily on his brother. ‘And if they’re our last chance? Our only chance?’
Jake reached into his pocket as his phone rang. He lifted it to his ear. He looked back at Caleb as he disconnected, his eyes rife with concern. ‘It’s Hade. Feinith’s here. He’s bringing her up.’
‘Just her?’
‘From what he said. You can’t let her in here. If she sees Leila like this, your secret’s going to be out.’
Caleb looked back down at Leila. ‘Maybe not.’
He stepped over to the drinks cabinet and grabbed a tumbler. He stepped back down onto the bed, gazed down at her for a moment as she lay there oblivious, her body open and exposed to him.
He lowered to his knees beside her and reached for one of the roses. He rubbed his thumb back and forth over the thorn as he gazed down at her closed eyes, the slight parting of those delicate lips.
Lifting her wrist with his other hand, he turned it so the soft pale flesh was exposed to him.
He slid the thorn through her skin before reaching for the tumbler, letting the droplets of her warm blood tap silently against the glass base. He sucked the remains from her wrist before sealing the wound.
He handed the tumbler across to his brother. ‘Get the test done and let me know as soon as you can,’ he said, standing. He stepped away to grab his shirt. He slipped it on and buttoned it up as he made his way up the steps.
‘You don’t want me to stay?’ Jake asked, following behind him.
‘We don’t have time.’
‘Don’t make another deal with Feinith, Caleb. Please.’
Caleb adjusted the collar on his shirt. ‘You know what you have to do.’
Jake held his gaze for a moment then nodded.
‘And Jake,’ Caleb said, recapturing his attention as his brother turned to key in the code to the door.
Jake looked across his shoulder. He could almost feel the weight on them.
Caleb said it, against every instinct. ‘There’s one more thing I want you to do for me.’
Chapter Thirty-one
Caleb stood at the wall, staring out over the district, when he caught a glimpse of Feinith in the corner of his eye.
He looked across his shoulder as she passed the top step, and turned to face her.
‘I haven’t been up here for a while,’ she said, sauntering towards him, giving her hips her usual purposeful sway.
‘You’re back early.’
She held up a piece of paper. ‘There was no point wasting time.’
He hated to admit to himself that he’d almost believed it impossible. ‘You got it?’
‘Seth’s name cleared of both negligence against the Higher Order and cowardice, anything to the contrary eradicated. Signed by Jarin.’
‘How did you manage to wangle that one, Feinith?’
She smiled. ‘You didn’t think I would, did you?’ She stepped over towards him. ‘But you have no idea how much you owe me, Caleb. The things I had to do for that piece of paper.’ She ran her hand down his chest. She indicated the dome. ‘What have you got in there?’
‘What do you think I’ve got in there?’
Her smile was slow, broad. ‘Well, well. I must admit, I did think it was a bit touch and go for a while. I almost believed she’d worked her charm on you. I guess I should have known better.’
He held out his hand for the paper, but she snatched it back, her grey eyes tauntingly locked on his.
‘I want to see her.’
‘And you will.’ He kept his palm upturned.
She licked her lips before closing the gap between them, held the paper up behind her back. Her large grey eyes were hooded, her full lips curving in a smile as she ran her hand around his neck. ‘Say please.’
‘Stop playing to an audience, Feinith,’ he said. ‘You’re teasing her.’
Feinith glanced across at the dome then back at him. ‘Do you think she’s watching?’
‘I don’t doubt it.’
‘Then kiss me.’
‘The paper.’
‘The kiss.’
As her cool, lifeless lips parted over his with expert precision, he felt nothing.
She pulled back, her lips parted, her eyes hungry. ‘You don’t need to be jealous of Jarin. It’s just the way it has to be. We have so much time to make
up for. And it can all start tonight.’
‘I’d hold that thought,’ he said, turning to the dome. He looked back across his shoulder at her. ‘You might want to come with me first.’
❄ ❄ ❄
Leila opened her eyes and stared up at the night sky. The rain had ceased but the residue of the previous downpour still glistened on the glass like a private planetarium.
She lifted her hand to her neck, where it still throbbed and ached from Caleb’s bite.
What she was touching was flesh. Warm flesh beneath her cold fingertips.
She sat up abruptly – too abruptly, the blood rush to her head forcing her to lie down for risk of passing out again.
She was alive. She was alive and still in the dome. Her subconscious had recognised it, and now the rest of her was acknowledging it too.
She eased herself onto her elbows more steadily and scanned the room. There was no sign of Caleb. No sign of anything. She moved onto her side, winced as the flexion in her wrist drew her attention to the pain there. She gently eased up into a seated position and examined the wound.
The last thing she remembered was clutching his hand.
Sickness clenched the pit of her stomach.
She’d been wrong about falling for him. He’d bitten and they’d gone to the Brink. They’d gone to the Brink and only she’d made it back. But she’d have a memory of it, surely. Surely there would be something.
She pulled herself onto her knees, taking a moment to gain her balance.
She needed to know where he was. She needed to see him.
Damn it, she needed to know he was okay.
She looked out of the dome, movement on the far side of the roof catching her attention. Three figures.
Caleb. She homed in on him instantly, everyone else fading into insignificance. He was there. Alive.
Alive and with Feinith.
She snapped back a breath, her heart pounding.
He’d taken only enough to make her pass out. She’d made him suspicious. He didn’t trust her. He suspected she was up to something. And he’d called Feinith.
She sank back onto her haunches. He’d gathered an audience. He hadn’t even started yet. This could still happen.
02 Blood Roses - Blackthorn Page 34