by Blake, Leta
Leith really had no idea what Zach meant, and he didn’t get the impression that Zach wanted to clarify. Leith took another drink of water, and waved the bottle toward Zach in an unspoken offer. After shaking his head, Zach relaxed into the chair, resting his head against the back. The angle emphasized the dark circles under Zach’s eyes.
“You seem pretty tired,” Leith said. “What do you do for work?”
“Oh, it’s not my work. I’ve just had a hard time sleeping lately.”
Leith let that response sink in. “It’s hard to sleep here too. Someone is always checking in on you or stabbing you with something sharp.”
Zach’s face softened with a smile.
“There, you’re relaxing now,” Leith said, taking another bite of bread. “When you came in, you reminded me of this bird when I was a kid, a hurt bird, right before he took off flying.”
Zach’s eyes flashed. “Leith, I’m not going anywhere.”
Leith stopped chewing his food. The intensity of Zach’s voice was unexpected, sudden, and full of something that made Leith’s stomach clench and his breath draw in sharply. He drank some more water, washing it away.
He tried to think of something to say that wouldn’t upset Zach. “So, how did I meet you?”
Sitting up straight, Zach said with false lightness, “I was on a cruise ship—”
“We met on a cruise ship?”
“No.” He laughed.
It was a really nice sound that made Leith feel warm and calm.
“I worked on a cruise ship as a steward for five years. When I decided to settle in one place and stay for good, my sister suggested I come to New York and move in with her.” He chuckled again. “Well, let’s just say that we’re great siblings but terrible roommates. That didn’t last long. Once I had a steady job, I started looking for a new place to stay. You and the girls were renting out the den as a bedroom. I answered your ad.”
“This was before my father died?”
“No, it was a while after that.”
Leith looked down at his hands. He hated thinking of his father’s death. He felt impotent, and angry, and most of all like he’d drown in a river of regrets if he let himself really feel it. “I went to stay with Arthur in Brooklyn instead of going home to my dad when I got out of prison,” Leith said, trying to understand it again. “I wasn’t there for him.”
“Leith,” Zach said, his voice smooth and calm. “Your father knew how much you loved him.”
Making a soft sound, Leith shook his head. “Yeah. You’re probably right.” But he wasn’t sure at all. “Do you…did I tell you why I was in prison?” It was years ago to everyone else, but he still expected to wake in his cell with old Hal snoring in the bunk above.
“A third degree felony. You were involved in an illegal underground MMA fight with unfortunate consequences.” Zach’s expression remained neutral.
It was strange how clearly he remembered that night—the make-shift cage, the adrenaline rush, the fear, and the blood—but he couldn’t remember the entirely legal boxing match that had landed him here.
“I know I’m right. Your father knew you loved him.”
Leith’s chest tightened. “How?”
“Because you told me the two of you made up before he died.”
“We did?”
Zach nodded.
Leith’s throat tightened and he stared down into the basket of food, trying to get control. He just wished he could have seen his father one last time. Though from what Zach said, perhaps he had. Maybe a picture would help.
“Zach,” Leith said, turning and looking him in the eye. “You asked if there was anything else you could bring me.”
“Yes.” Zach leaned forward. “Anything.”
“Can you bring some photos?”
“Of your father?”
“Yes, and some from my life these last three years or so? I got a card from a girl. Naomi? An ex-girlfriend, Arthur said. I don’t even know what she looks like. Maybe if I saw her picture…”
Zach pressed his lips together and nodded slowly, his eyes flickering. “Sure. I’ll bring them tomorrow.”
Zach’s eyes made Leith think again of the kinglet’s wings as they’d shimmered in the sunlight. “Thanks.” The air in the room felt heavy. He grabbed the item on top of the basket, keeping his tone light. “This is the cheese I want to marry, huh?”
Standing up, Zach clapped his hands lightly in an almost effeminate manner, and the sound broke the moment. The question seemed to bring about a change in Zach, who said, “Yes, it’s your true love. Or so you declared to me a few months ago.”
Zach’s eyes smiled, filled with amused affection. Leith liked it. He wondered what he could say to make Zach smile like that again. It looked much better on him than the tense sadness he’d come in wearing. Then, just as suddenly, the smile was gone.
“I guess I should leave now.”
Leith’s surprise must have shown on his face. “But you just got here.” And I was just starting to feel comfortable with you.
“I wish I could stay, but I…really can’t.”
“You don’t want to share this cheese?”
“Polyamory was never your style,” Zach countered, and then smiled warmly again.
His teeth were very white, and his lips a reddish pink. Leith thought Zach came across as a little prissy, a little uptight, but something about it made him feel like laughing inside. He must have found him amusing before. Obviously, or else they wouldn’t be best friends.
“The thing is, I have a business to run,” Zach went on. “Unfortunately I need to go.”
“What kind of business?”
“A bar.”
“Oh, my brother owns a bar. On Fifth Avenue in Park Slope. Or so he tells me. Supposedly I used to work—” Leith let the sentence hang. “Right, so you know that, don’t you?”
Zach spun around, moving the chair back into its original position. But Leith had seen his face twist like he was fighting tears.
He faced Leith again. “Believe it or not it’s the same bar. Arthur’s my business partner. I’ll tell you all about it another day, okay? The doctors say it’s time to start introducing you to some of your history, now that you’ve dealt with—” Zach stopped short.
“My father’s death?”
“It takes some time.”
“Time!” Leith said, and threw his hands up.
“Yes.” Zach stiffly lifted his right hand in a flat-palmed wave. “Well, see you.”
“When? Tomorrow?”
Zach nodded, smiling softly. “Sure, if you want.”
“You’ll bring pictures?”
“Sure.” Zach stood there a long moment, and then turned.
Leith noticed there were multiple decorative zippers on the back pockets of Zach’s jeans, drawing attention to his ass. When Zach looked back at the door, Leith jerked his head up.
“All right then. Goodbye.” Zach’s voice was tight, and he seemed as tense as he’d been when he came in.
Leith remembered what Arthur had said, and he called out just as Zach’s hand touched the door knob. “Zach?”
When Zach turned, his eyes were a hot green, and his lips trembled a little. “Yes?”
“Hey, uh, before you leave…?” Leith held out his arm to indicate the offer of a hug.
Zach hesitated, lower lip in his teeth, but then crossed over to Leith solemnly. When Zach bent down to hug him, Leith felt him relax in his arms. Leith closed his eyes, surprised when his left hand cupped the back of Zach’s neck in an unplanned motion, his fingers tracing the soft hair there. He took a deep breath. A sweet, spicy scent filled his lungs, and suddenly he was warm all over. His heart jolted. He’d smelled that before. Somewhere. He took another deep breath.
“Don’t forget—I’m not going anywhere,” Zach whispered fiercely.
“I thought you were going to work,” Leith whispered, turning his face toward Zach’s ear, having an odd urge to taste the cologne he smelled.<
br />
Zach pulled away, his eyes laughing. “You always think you’re so funny, don’t you?”
For a moment Leith thought something else was about to happen, something that made him lick his lips and hold his breath. But then it passed, and he felt like he’d missed something important.
Zach grabbed a piece of the bread. “You don’t mind sharing?”
Leith was tempted to grab it back, thinking that somehow that would be the right thing to do, but he simply shrugged.
“See you tomorrow, Leith.”
“See you.” Leith said, watching the door shut behind Zach. He smelled his fingers. The sweet-spicy scent of Zach’s cologne clung to them, and deep inside his brain something stirred. It made him jumpy; like there was an itch in there he simply couldn’t scratch.
ONE MONTH EARLIER
VLOG ENTRY #1
INT. BAR – BOOTH – NIGHT
Zach adjusts the camera on his laptop and leans back. He smiles and salutes.
ZACH
Greetings, friends, Romans, and countrymen! Lend me your ears! Yes, I know, I know. Long time no see, huh? Can you believe it’s been three whole years since I stopped vlogging about my thrilling life on a cruise ship and started vlogging about my boring life in Brooklyn? Plenty of you hung on with me through that transition, and I appreciated that loyalty. And how did I repay you? I disappeared for the past year! Sure, things here have been incredibly busy, but that’s no excuse for neglecting you, my loyal followers.
So, I’m here to catch you up on all the latest excitement going on in my new life here in the Big Apple! First…
He stretches his arms wide, indicating the booth he’s seated in, and the blue and green décor behind him.
My bar! Blue Flight! Yes, you heard it right. I, Zachariah Stephens, am officially part owner of this fine, and if I say so myself, cooler-than-cool establishment. Can you believe it? Everyone who’s known me my whole life can tell you that I’ve wanted to own a bar since I was five years old and swirled my first fake martini in a doll’s tea cup.
Blue Flight is an absolute dream come true. Oh, and get this—our apartment is just above it. I barely roll out of bed and I’m at work in the morning. My commute is a staircase. Envy me.
And it’s all thanks to my wonderful, amazing, and beautiful sister, Maddie, who provided me with a serious cash infusion in the form of a big, fat loan, making all of this…
He indicates the room again.
…possible! And, Maddie, if you ever see this, mwah! You’re the best! Thank you, thank you! I forgive you for outing me to Mom when I was twelve! All is forgiven!
Zach’s smile fades, and his gaze moves away from the camera.
And then there’s Leith. I’ve told you about him before, back when we started our unexpected little romance. Well, Leith has a championship boxing match tomorrow. It’s the most important title bout of his career. I’m excited for him, and I know he’s worked up too. But lately we seem to get into small fights over every little thing.
He crosses his arms over his chest.
Of course, Leith is anxious. Very anxious. And saying that he deals well with anxiety is like saying that I’m a virgin. So right now everything I do or say annoys him, and my attempts to help him are seen as nuisances rather than as the acts of kindness, support, and love they’re intended to be. I don’t know what to do for him when he gets like this. He can be such an ass.
He sighs and gathers himself.
Ah well, it doesn’t really matter. Leith knows that I love him, and that I want only good things for him, and I know that he loves me. Now all he has to do is defeat this meathead in the ring, and then things will go back to normal. When it comes to knocking out 160 pounds of muscle in the boxing ring, he’s a champion. When it comes to dealing with anxiety, he’s a bull in a china shop.
Zach shrugs and leans forward.
If this is the price I occasionally have to pay for the happiness our life together brings me, then it’s more than worth it. Most of the time, we’re the perfect couple, and we fit together brilliantly. If I weren’t part of us, I’d envy us. We are that good—
LEITH (off screen)
Zach?
ZACH
Here!
LEITH
There you are. Are you talking to yourself? Should I be worried?
Leith leans into the booth and kisses Zach, cupping his hand on the back of Zach’s neck.
I couldn’t sleep. I kept thinking about how grumpy I was with you earlier. I’m sorry. I’m an ass.
ZACH
Okay.
LEITH
Okay? “Okay” you agree that I’m an ass?
ZACH
Yep. Absolutely. Of course, it takes one to know one. But, hey, scoot over here so the camera can get a good picture of your pretty face.
Zach moves over and Leith slides in close to him in the booth.
I’ve started up my YouTube channel again. I’m making a video blog about all the amazing things that have happened in the last year. Well, and about how you, Mr. Wenz, are sometimes a giant ass.
LEITH
And you’re doing it now? It’s almost midnight.
ZACH
It’s a good distraction from what an ass my boyfriend is being.
LEITH
Are you really filming right now? I’m wearing my pajamas.
ZACH
Boxers and a T-shirt. Oh yes, the viewers will be scandalized.
LEITH
Seriously Zach, I’m really sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t be such a dick to you. I know you’re just trying to help, and I appreciate it. I do.
ZACH
He turns to the camera, keeping his arm around Leith’s neck and shaking him a little.
See, my loves? He’s much too pretty and sweet to stay angry with for long.
LEITH
You’ve really been telling them about our fight?
ZACH
Don’t worry. You didn’t come off too badly. I’d already moved on to telling them that, truly, we’re the perfect couple.
LEITH
He looks straight at the camera.
Well, I don’t know about that, but it’s true that my boyfriend here likes to brag.
ZACH
I only tell the truth. They’ll just have to suffer the same soul-crushing envy that everyone else who knows us suffers from.
Leith scoffs as Zach chuckles and kisses him again. Leith cups his face and tilts his head, deepening the kiss. Zach breaks away.
ZACH
Okay, perhaps we should wrap this up. It’s only eight hours until my sweetie here has to be up and at ‘em to prepare for his boxing match.
LEITH
Seven.
ZACH
Seven? It’s later than I thought. We need to get your fuzzy head to bed. So, my loves—I’ll see you tomorrow! Or rather, you’ll see me!
LEITH
Tomorrow? You’re going to make this a regular thing?
ZACH
Yeah. It’s fun, and it’s good for me to get things off of my chest, don’t you think?
LEITH
Sure. Comment below if you think Zach is a dork.
He avoids Zach’s attempt to smack the back of his head.
ZACH
Until tomorrow! Mwah!
LEITH
Adios, Zach’s amigos.
Chapter Two
The hospital garden was in full summer bloom. The roses were especially lush and vibrant, appearing ready to burst with delicious-smelling beauty. His psychiatrist, Dr. Thakur, suggested they take a walk together during their session to help Leith get some strength back. As they strolled, Leith was vaguely embarrassed that his stamina wasn’t even half as good his doctor’s. He had to pause and catch his breath more than once.
As he did, Leith took the opportunity to study Dr. Thakur’s now familiar laugh lines around his twinkling dark brown eyes, his smooth dark skin, and his pitch-black hair. He was slightly rotund, and that, along with h
is age, reminded Leith of his father.
But that was where the resemblance ended. Leith’s father had been fully German—with blond hair and blue eyes—and an alcoholic gambling addict, while Dr. Thakur was a successful, self-contained man who didn’t seem likely to bet on anything.
“I’ve been checking in with the physical therapists,” Dr. Thakur said in his mild Chicago accent. His strong hand supported Leith’s waist when he wavered on the path. “You’re making good progress, but we all believe getting outside more will be good for you. As long as the weather holds, I’d like you to walk out here every day.”