The Importance of Being Emma

by Juliet Archer

  I checked my watch. ‘I’ve got to go. Goodbye, Mary, don’t worry about Jane, I’m sure she knows what she’s doing by now.’

  I gave her a swift kiss on the cheek and dashed back to the taxi. Harriet didn’t seem inclined to talk, so I had time to think. I decided my priority was to get Rob and Harriet on the plane to Mumbai. Then I would come straight back to Highbury and offer Emma a shoulder to cry on. Judging by that glimpse I’d had of her face, the shock had already worn off and the heartache had started. And who else was there to comfort her? Her father and sister were about as much use as a chocolate teapot; and Kate, the obvious choice, just happened to be Churchill’s stepmother.

  We arrived at Rob’s house with Harriet chewing her lip and me feeling almost as apprehensive. Rob answered the door, his face white and set. I wasted no time in taking his bags and ordering him into the taxi. As Jack and I rearranged the luggage so that we could get everything in the boot, I glanced into the back of the car. To my relief, Rob and Harriet were in each other’s arms. I got into the front seat beside Jack and spent the rest of the journey learning more than I ever wanted to know about his recent hernia operation. I decided it was preferable to being too close to the heavy breathing in the back.

  When we reached Gatwick, I took Rob, Harriet and their luggage to the Emirates Air check-in. It was there that I announced that something urgent had cropped up and I was postponing my trip. I told them my friend Anil would meet them at Mumbai airport and take them to my flat; he lived in the same complex and would be on hand to show them around. I wished them well and reminded them to contact me on my mobile if they needed to. I doubted whether they took in more than one word in ten; they spent the whole time grinning inanely at each other.

  As soon as they disappeared through passport control, I returned to the taxi rank where Jack was waiting. I couldn’t face any more of his medical history, so I pretended I needed a power nap and sat in the back. Soon we were on the M25 again, this time travelling clockwise. It was now raining steadily and the windscreen wipers kept up a mind-numbing rhythm that stopped me from thinking too far ahead.

  By the time Jack dropped me and my luggage at Hartfield, it was nearly one o’clock. As I watched the taxi trundle down the drive, I realised that this was it, there was no going back. I rang the bell and waited, hands clasped behind me, one forefinger tracing the links of my watch.

  When Henry answered the door, his jaw dropped. ‘Mark? What are you doing here?’ He stood back as I piled my bags into the hall.

  ‘No time to explain, I need to see Emma.’

  ‘She’s not here, she went out about fifteen minutes ago. Didn’t want any lunch, told me she was going for a walk to clear her head. She’s not answering her mobile and I’m very worried about her.’

  ‘I know, is – is she terribly upset?’ I said, cursing the catch in my voice.

  He raised his eyebrows. ‘Upset? I don’t know about that, but she went out without her coat. She’ll catch her death, and then where will we all be?’

  I bit back an impatient retort. ‘I’ll find her, don’t worry. See you later.’

  As I made to leave, he pulled me back. ‘You’re leaving those bags here?’

  ‘Just for a little while – are they in your way?’

  ‘No, no, I’m sure I won’t trip over them.’

  I sighed, shut the front door before he could complain about the draught, and quickly stowed the bags under the stairs. I’d just yanked the door open again, when he gave a little moan.

  I turned and glared at him. ‘Yes?’

  ‘Look at that rain, poor Emma’s got no coat and that jacket of yours looks very flimsy, at least let me fetch an umbrella – ’

  I ignored him and slammed the door behind me so hard that the house shook. The rain whipped into me, but I barely noticed. From Hartfield, there was only one obvious walk – down the bridle path to Donwell. I started to jog, heedless of the mud spattering my light grey trousers, my eyes trained on the path stretching emptily out in front. Emma had a good head start, quarter of an hour according to Henry, and visibility was poor in the rain. As the minutes passed and I still couldn’t see her, I wondered if I’d got it wrong. Perhaps she’d gone to Randalls to pour her heart out to Kate after all.

  Suddenly, through the mist, no more than a hundred yards ahead, I saw red trousers bright as a robin’s breast. I didn’t call her name, just quickened my pace.

  ~~EMMA~~

  I heard the footsteps behind me and whirled round. A tall, well-made man was running towards me, jacket flapping.

  ‘The idiot,’ I thought, ‘he’ll get drenched, like me. But I want to be cold and miserable.’

  Then I saw who it was and my heart missed a beat. I hurriedly wiped the tears from my eyes with the back of my hand and fixed a defiant look on my face.

  ‘Why aren’t you at the airport?’ I flung the words at him, like stones, as he approached.

  He skidded to a halt within two feet of me, his breath coming in gasps, great shuddering gasps. ‘I heard – the news – and I had to come.’ When he’d steadied himself, he went on, ‘I can see how upset you are about Churchill – ’

  ‘Churchill?’

  ‘I mean Flynn,’ he said quietly, ‘and Jane. Come here.’

  He gathered me to him, held me tight. I was soaked to the skin and my teeth were chattering, but I could have stayed there for ever, my face pressed against his chest, breathing his scent, listening to the thud-thud of his heart.

  But I couldn’t stay there for ever, because he didn’t belong to me. For the first time in my life, I, Emma Woodhouse, wanted to be somebody else: Harriet Smith, chav. I blinked back more tears.

  Then I heard him muttering to himself. ‘The wanker doesn’t know when he’s well off … and to let you find out like that … I’ve a good mind to go to the Lakes and beat him to pulp … ’

  ‘Mark?’ It came out as little more than a croak.

  ‘Yes?’ He held me away from him, his eyes bleak as they searched my tear-streaked face.

  ‘What are you on about? Who are you going to beat to pulp?’ I shivered, partly from the cold, partly from his words.

  He folded me in his arms again. ‘That bastard Churchill, who else?’

  I laid my damp cheek against his damp shirt, now totally confused. He was meant to be on his way to India with Harriet; yet here he was behaving as if he was insanely jealous of Flynn – after denying any feelings at all for Saint Jane of Highbury!

  ‘For God’s sake, if Flynn wants Jane, good luck to him,’ I said, in a choked voice.

  My cheek rose and fell as he let out a long sigh. Several times he seemed about to speak, but stopped himself. I said nothing; it was enough to be this close for a few minutes more.

  Then, at last, he broke the silence and it was his turn to sound choked. ‘You’re too generous, he doesn’t deserve you, my darling. He’ll never deserve you, ever.’

  Hang on, Flynn deserving me? My darling?

  I stifled a hysterical giggle. ‘Mark, have you been taking too many of those malaria tablets?’

  His arms tightened round me. ‘This isn’t a joke, just tell me what you want me to do to him and I’ll do it.’

  ‘But I don’t want you to do anything to him.’

  He held me away from him, his eyes wide with disbelief. ‘You can’t possibly want to go through with the engagement after this!’

  I stared up at him. ‘What engagement?’

  ‘He wanted to give you the ring on Christmas Day, I saw the little box.’

  I frowned, trying to remember … ‘Oh that, it wasn’t a ring, it was some very expensive earrings that he pretended he’d bought for me, just to impress Kate and Tom. But I wouldn’t accept them, even before he told me they were really for someone else. He must have meant Jane, although at the time I thought they were for – ’ I stopped myself just in time from saying Harriet’s name. But it reminded me that Mark had a new person in his life. I twisted out of his arms and turned
away.

  He seized me by the shoulders, forcing me to look at him. ‘Engagement or no engagement, there was something going on between you,’ he said hoarsely. ‘Whenever I saw you together, he couldn’t keep his hands off you.’

  I gave a weary laugh. ‘Don’t you see? That was all a game, to fool people – especially Stella, if she sent her spies round. And to make Jane so jealous that, in the end, she’d make up her mind about him for once and for all. God knows he’s the sort that would flirt with a block of wood, I was just a more convincing alternative. And I’m ashamed to say I never suspected a thing, I even played along, most of the time – ’

  ‘I’ll say you played along, you were in his arms just the other night, at Donwell!’

  ‘I needed a hug, that’s all,’ I said indignantly, looking straight at him. ‘Look, I admit I fancied him to begin with, I’ve been dying to meet him for years, but I soon realised that he wasn’t the man of my dreams. Quite the opposite. He’s good fun but, like you said, he’s a wanker.’ I stared down at my soaked trainers. ‘So you certainly don’t have to beat him to pulp for my sake, but I can see that you might want to for Jane’s.’ Then I remembered the agony of seeing Harriet wrapped round Mark in the taxi. But my agony couldn’t compare to hers if she ever discovered that he was secretly in love with Jane. Poor, trusting Harriet …

  I added bitterly, ‘Although that wouldn’t be very fair to Harriet, would it?’

  He tilted my face gently upwards, his fingers warm on my ice-cold skin. ‘What on earth are you getting at? Wait a minute, you don’t honestly think – ’

  I wrenched myself from his grasp. ‘I’ll never understand what you see in her, you’d have been better off with Jane. At least she wouldn’t have plastered herself all over you in a taxi, in the middle of Highbury high street! Still, whatever gives you your kicks, I suppose.’

  And then he laughed; the bastard threw back his head and laughed, while I stood there in the pouring rain, feeling cold and wet and utterly alone.

  ‘So glad I can still make you laugh,’ I said miserably.

  He gripped my shoulders, gripped them so tight it hurt; but I didn’t want him to let go.

  ‘Yes, Emma, you make me laugh … and you make me cry.’ His eyes were fixed on mine and they weren’t bleak any more, they were clear and bright. ‘You make me cry, because … ’ He cleared his throat. ‘Because I love you. I think I always have, since the day you were born.’

  I felt more tears well up, tears of anger and disappointment. ‘Yes, like a little sister, why don’t you say it, you dickhead!’ I aimed a kick at his shin, missed and burst into loud sobs.

  His voice was low and tender. ‘If you still think that, after all that’s happened between us, then you’re the dickhead, my love. Ever since I saw you again last September, I’ve had the most unbrotherly thoughts about you.’

  I stopped crying at once. Unbrotherly?

  He went on, ‘No wonder I couldn’t resist you at Forbury Manor, it was like all my fantasies coming true. Don’t you know how much – ’

  He got no further. I flung my arms round his neck and pulled him towards me. Our mouths met, hard with hunger, soft with longing. It was the kiss I’d been waiting for all my life, the kiss from the man of my dreams. When at last we drew apart, it felt as though we were already inseparable.

  ‘I love you, Mark,’ I whispered, ‘you’re the only one I want.’

  He gave me a long, lingering smile, then his face clouded. ‘To think I might never have heard you say that! I only came back because I found out about Churchill and assumed you’d be devastated. Otherwise I’d be on the way to Mumbai by now, with Harriet and – ’

  ‘Harriet! What are we going to do about her?’ With a groan, I twisted away from him.

  ‘Absolutely nothing.’ He stroked the corner of my mouth with his thumb. ‘God, how I love kissing you.’

  I closed my eyes, but I could still see Harriet’s face, full of reproach. ‘Mark, you’ll have to tell her and you’ll have to go to India to do it. Poor thing, stuck out there all on her own.’

  He sighed. ‘I’ve got a confession to make. She’s not on her own, she’s with Rob.’

  I jerked my head round. ‘Rob? Rob who?’

  ‘Rob Martin, I thought they could make a go of things if they just had a bit of space. And they both seem very happy. Whatever you thought was going on in that taxi between me and Harriet couldn’t be further from the truth.’

  Relief flooded through me, relief mingled with unrestrained delight. Now wasn’t the time for me to criticise him about interfering in other people’s relationships, although I didn’t intend to let the opportunity slip by! Now was the time to show him just how much I loved him. I slipped my hands inside his jacket and held him tight. The main thing was that he was here with me, and Harriet was none the worse for it; in fact, it looked as though she’d transferred her affections remarkably quickly back to Robert.

  ‘Sorry, I interrupted you just then,’ I said, with a slow smile. ‘You were telling me how much you loved kissing me. And, as my mentor, I’m sure you told me that it’s actions – not words – that count, didn’t you?’

  He laughed. ‘As your mentor, I tried very hard not to think about kissing you at all. But I’m not your mentor any more, am I?’

  And then his mouth sought mine and his hands moved urgently over my body, moulding me to him, stirring buried memories. Even through my wet clothes, his touch was electric; when he ran his fingers across the bare skin beneath my jumper, I was close to meltdown. Overwhelmed by need, we broke apart and simply stared at each other. Around us, raindrops pattered from overhanging branches, a counterpoint to our ragged breathing.

  ‘Emma, I know Forbury Manor was a mistake – ’

  ‘Was it?’

  ‘Wasn’t it?’

  I shrugged. ‘I don’t know. Maybe it was meant to happen.’

  ‘I lied to you, about Tamara. I couldn’t even start to compare her with you, you’re – ’

  I put my finger to his lips. ‘Then don’t, my love. And I lied to you. After the initial shock had worn off, I remembered a lot more than I said I did.’

  ‘Do you want to … ’ – he hesitated – ‘refresh your memory?’

  ‘Yes, more than anything in the world.’ I smiled up at him as I slipped my hand into his.

  ‘Where shall we go?’

  I looked along the bridle path, towards Hartfield. ‘We can go this way, I suppose, to my place – ’

  ‘Where Henry will insist on making you a custard poultice for your chest,’ he put in.

  I giggled. ‘A mustard poultice, you idiot.’

  ‘Far too spicy, darling, it has to be custard.’ He turned towards Donwell. ‘Or we can go that way, to my place, where I’m sure I can think of something equally therapeutic to put on your chest.’

  I shot him a provocative look from under my eyelashes. ‘That sounds promising, but what about George and Saffron?’

  ‘They’re out, not due back until early evening.’

  I shivered, this time with pure pleasure. ‘Your place it is, then, but I’ll need to phone Dad. What if he goes on about me catching cold and insists on coming to fetch me?’

  ‘Leave Henry to me,’ Mark said briskly.

  We shared one more lingering kiss, then broke into a run.

  ~~MARK~~

  We reached Donwell Abbey in five minutes flat, half running, half walking, laughing all the way like a pair of kids. There was no sign of Father’s car, thank God; so far, so good. We stood on the doorstep and held each other close. I tilted her face towards me, aching to feel her lips on mine again.

  Instead, I found myself saying, ‘Emma, are you sure about this? If you want more time – ’

  ‘I’m absolutely sure, don’t waste your breath asking me unnecessary questions, you idiot.’

  I grinned and felt automatically in my jacket pocket. Nothing. ‘Shit, I gave my key back to Father this morning, didn’t think I’d be needing it a
gain.’

  Her face fell. ‘We’ll have to go to Hartfield, then.’

  ‘No, wait, there’s still a chance I can get in. Stay here.’

  I hurried round the back of the house. I’d just remembered that Father and Saffron were in the middle of a battle about the dog being relegated to the utility room whenever they went out. Saffron would tolerate this cruelty only if the window was shut, in case Tao caught pneumonia; Father wanted the window left open, to clear the smell of incontinent dog. Whether I could get into the house now depended on which one of them had been in the utility room last …

  It must have been Father; the small upper window was wide open. With a whoop, I stretched up, reached inside, opened the big lower window, hauled myself onto the ledge and squeezed through the gap, nearly landing on top of poor Tao. He growled reproachfully as I dashed through the kitchen and into the hall to turn off the burglar alarm, before opening the front door for Emma. Then she was in my arms again; but this time we were somewhere warm and dry and totally private, and the possibilities were endless.

  ‘You’re wet through, you need to get your clothes off as soon as possible,’ I said, letting go of her reluctantly.

  She bent down to remove her trainers. ‘That’s the best offer I’ve had in a while.’

  I felt myself harden just looking at her. ‘Come upstairs. Now.’

  There was a teasing glint in her eye. ‘Not until you ring Dad.’

  I almost sprinted across the hall and phoned Hartfield. ‘Henry? … Yes, I’ve found her, safe and sound – but too far from home, so we came to Donwell instead … Yes, I’m going to warm her up as fast as I can … What was that? Get her to swallow a chopped garlic clove with a spoonful of honey? Fascinating. Actually, I’ve got another little remedy in mind … No, nothing to do with onions, although it could make her eyes water … Yes, I’ll bring her home later.’ I replaced the receiver and turned to Emma with a broad grin. ‘There, that’s Henry sorted. He’s very interested in my little remedy, wants you to give him all the details so that he can add it to his collection.’