by Twyla Turner
Ivan roars before landing a jab to my stomach. Luckily, I was ready for it and had tensed my abdominal muscles. I only grunt and wince slightly. Ivan grits his teeth and shakes out his hand.
I smile inside.
“Huh… I guess I did create the perfect killing machine. You’re like a tank, Skotina. Too bad your loyalty isn’t as strong.” He walks over to Winter, and I tense. He slides his hand down the front of her body and cups her sex. “You get a little pussy, and you become a turncoat. Though I’ll admit, it is some good pussy.”
Winter struggles to get away from him. Tears immediately fill her eyes and spill down her cheeks.
“I have a mind to fuck her in front of you again and when I’m done, force you to watch as each of my guards fuck her too.” Ivan looks around at his guards gathered around us with guns trained on me. “What do you say, boys?”
They all nod or mumble their approval as they look at Winter with lustful eyes.
“Get. Your. Fucking. Hands. Off. Of. Her!” I say each word distinctly.
The shock of hearing me speak for the first time makes Ivan step away from her.
“Are you fucking serious?! You can speak?” Ivan walks over to me and grasps me behind my neck, looking me straight in the eyes.
“Yes,” I grit out.
“You kept this from me for twenty fucking years?” I only look at him. “But you’ve known her for all of a month, and I bet she knows you can talk.”
He looks over at Winter, and she glances away.
“That’s what I thought.” He shoves me back. “Where’s the fucking loyalty?!”
He starts to pace in front of us again. He stops suddenly and snaps his fingers.
“I know what to do. Viktor, get the flowers.” Ivan orders one of his men.
The man jogs off to the cars. He comes back with a bouquet of white roses and hands them to Ivan. Winter’s signature flowers.
Ivan pulls a single, perfect rose from the bunch and tosses the rest on the floor. He walks toward Winter with a sly smile.
“I had planned on buying you roses as a gift for being away. But then I heard about your little plan to run away from me. You do know that these days we all leave digital breadcrumbs if we’re not careful, right?” He leans in and taps the rose petals against Winter’s lips. “I bugged your phone because I had a feeling you two would betray me the minute I left. It only took you twenty minutes.”
Winter’s eyes widen.
“Yeah, I knew the whole time. In fact, I purposely left to see what you two would do. And as it turns out you have no fucking loyalty. Now the roses will serve as a farewell.”
“P-Please, Ivan. Just let us go,” Winter pleads. “You can have pretty much any woman you want, and you have plenty of loyal guards. None of this is truly hurting you. Just let us be.”
“The woman I want is you.” Ivan steps back to look at us both. “But you’re right, I do have plenty of loyal guards. It’s definitely time to dispose of those who haven’t proved themselves. So how about a game? A little game of ‘She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not.’ I’ll pluck each petal on the flower. Just like the childhood game. If when I get to the last petal, it lands on ‘she loves me,’ Skotina will be free to go, and you’ll never see his ugly face again. If the last petal lands on ‘she loves me not…’” Ivan runs his index finger across his neck, mimicking my death.
I am not worried or scared for myself. It is Winter that I fear for. If I am not here to protect her, who will be?
“Let’s begin, shall we?” Ivan grins as he places his finger around the first petal. “She loves me. She loves me not.”
I struggle against the guard holding me. It would be easy to take him down.
“Don’t even think about it,” Ivan says in the middle of his game.
The guard holding Winter reaches inside his suit jacket and pulls out a gun. He places it against her temple. I immediately stop moving.
“Now. Where was I? Oh, yes. She loves me…” Ivan continues, enjoying every minute of our distress.
I hold my breath as the petals dwindle from the stem and fall around Ivan’s feet.
“She loves me not…she loves me,” Ivan says as the last petal floats down to the concrete.
I hear Winter release a pent up breath mixed with a sob. She trusts Ivan will keep his word. I know better.
“Well, look at that. Skotina, she loves you. And that’s the problem.” Ivan says before snatching the gun out of his guard’s hand.
POP! POP!
The sound of two gunshots pierce my ears, and the punch and sting of two bullets hit me. I feel my feet fly up from under me and I crash to the floor. All I can feel is the burn as my vision flickers. I hear screams in the distance. And then a voice says something over me.
“So long as you live, she’ll love you and hope you’ll find her. Hope is a cruel emotion. This will be much less cruel for her.” Ivan says as he kneels over me. “I wanted to cut your dick and balls off, shove them down your throat, and let you bleed out on the dirty floor like I found you all those years ago. But because you were like a son to me, I decided to give you a more humane death. Goodbye, old friend.”
How ironic. Twice I have been near death. The first time, Ivan was there standing over me. Ready to be my savior. Now again, we find ourselves in the same position. This time though, he’s my executioner.
Ivan stands and drops one of the roses on top of me before stepping out of view. I cough and taste blood. Even in death, all I can think about is her.
I am so sorry, Winter. I failed you.
The last thing I hear is her broken sobs fading away and the squeal of tires.
Chapter 25
POP! POP!
I flinch at each shot. My mouth flies open in shock as quick flashes of light spark from the end of the gun. I gasp and clap my hands over my mouth when I look over at Yury. He’s down on the floor, and there’s a wet spot spreading across the black shirt he’s wearing. His hand touches his head on the side I can’t see, and when he pulls it away, blood is covering it. He coughs, and blood sprays out of his mouth.
I lose it.
I go wild, trying to break free from the guard’s hold on me. Tears stream down my face and I can’t see anything. My throat goes raw from my broken sobs.
My heart is shattered.
All I want to do is go to him. To touch him one last time. To squeeze his hand and tell him that I love him. To kiss his lips as I feel his last breath.
Instead, the guard drags me away with the help of another. They toss me into a car, and a few moments later, Ivan slides in. I don’t think. I don’t hesitate. I just attack.
I want to maim him. Kill him. I use fists, nails, and teeth, whatever. I think I even land a kick to his groin.
Ivan finds an opening, and he takes it. His hands wrap around my neck, and he squeezes until I stop fighting. I get a small sliver of satisfaction when I look at his face. It’s shredded. He’s not so pretty anymore.
“I will fucking kill you now, you fucking whore!” Ivan growls as spit flies from his mouth.
“Do it,” I gasp from around his hold on my throat. “You took everything from me. Do you think I care?”
Tears roll down my face. I really don’t care anymore. I am broken. I don’t have my freedom, and I don’t have Yury.
What is there to live for?
Ivan slowly releases my neck. He pulls the handkerchief from his breast pocket and presses it against his face as he stares at me angrily.
“No, death is too good for you. Instead, you’ll suffer locked away for good or until you give me the chance I deserve. And with Skotina out of the way, maybe you won’t be distracted by his brooding good looks,” he scoffs with sarcasm.
“His name is Yury.”
“Was Yury.”
Before I realize what I’m doing my hand cracks across his already scratched cheek. A fraction of a second later my head whips to the side and my face stings as Ivan backhands me. The metallic taste of blood fil
ls my mouth. My tongue touches my lips, and I feel the split through my bottom lip.
“Get her out of my sight,” Ivan growls at his guard.
The guard gets out of the front seat and comes around to pull me from the car. As he tosses me into the back of one of the other black cars, I hear sirens in the distance. They must have heard them too because we take off out of the hangar like a bat outta hell. I look back to see Faith standing on the tarmac. Her shoulders slumped in defeat.
I feel the same.
Chapter 26
Four months later…
Today is the first day I’ve bathed in weeks. Maybe months. My hair has been matted to my head and resembled more of a bird’s nest than hair. I hadn’t cared enough to smell good or be pretty. And with flies practically circling around my head, Ivan hadn’t been interested enough to touch me. That was the way I liked it.
I cry all the time too. I only knew Yury for about a month, but he left an indelible mark on my heart. I think about him all the time. Every time the maid knocks on the door before entering to leave my meal, I remember his soft, quick three rap knock. Every time, it brings tears to my eyes.
I think I’ve given the maid a complex.
The food she brought went untouched for the most part. I could only take a few bites. I didn’t want to eat. I wanted to die. But Ivan even took that away from me. He removed any items that could be fashioned into a knife to slit my wrists. He even had the linens removed from the bed so that I couldn’t make a noose out of the sheets.
I cry myself to sleep every night listening to Yury’s music player as I lay on the bare mattress. Every memory of him starts the flow of fresh tears, and since everything about this place reminds me of him, the waterworks rarely stop.
When Ivan first brought me back here, he tried to bend me to his will, like when I’d first arrived. But I wasn’t biting. I didn’t care what he did to me.
He tried visiting me in my room (that he kindly moved me back into after I tried to attack him in the middle of his sleep), but I said nothing. He also had me drug down to the dining room (I refused to walk) to have dinner with him, but I remained catatonic. Eventually, when he realized I wasn’t backing down and when I really started to smell, he stopped forcing me to visit with him altogether.
He didn’t even attempt to bring me down to the club again. Smart. I would’ve gladly pissed and shit in the middle of the stage for all I cared. And he knew that.
Last week, my despair hit a new high. I was lying in bed one afternoon when I kept feeling flutters deep in my stomach. I’d never felt that before. And a sudden thought came to my head.
I haven’t had my period since my second week here.
Through everything that I’d been through, it hadn’t even crossed my mind. If I’d have had morning sickness, maybe I would’ve noticed sooner. But just to be sure, when the maid came back to drop off my dinner, I begged her to bring me a pregnancy test the next day. The next day a test was underneath the domed metal cover on my breakfast tray. I immediately took the test.
I stared at those two blue lines for hours after they appeared. Then the tears came. I could barely breathe I sobbed so hard.
I was pregnant. With a little Winter or a little Yury. There was no doubt in my mind that the baby was his. He was the only man that I’d slept with without protection. He was the only one who left a part of himself inside of me every time we connected. And he’d never see her. Or hold him. He or she would never know their father and how strong, protective, and sensitive he was. It nearly killed me. I wanted to give up.
Today, felt different. Today, I woke up feeling fiercely protective of the little human growing inside of me. Today, it felt like my personal responsibility as a mother to nurture this baby and make sure I tell him or her about how wonderful their father was. To make sure they know him and that he lives on through them.
So today, I suck it up. I sit in the bathtub for about an hour, to loosen up the months’ worth of filth layered on my skin. Then I move to the shower to scrub it all away. I pay extra attention to my now rounded and slightly protruding tummy. I condition my hair and spend hours patiently detangling the mess with my fingers.
Now, I’m bathed, buffed, fresh, and moisturized. I feel better than I have in a while. My heart still aches…a lot. But I try to fill the void Yury left with the love I already have for our unborn baby.
I have no idea what Ivan will do when he realizes I’m pregnant with his dead guard’s baby. All know is, I will fight with everything I have to protect and do what’s right for it.
~~~
I dress in a loose-fitting shift dress, one of the only items that still fits me and doesn’t reveal my baby bump. When the maid comes in, I immediately inform her that I’d like to have dinner with Mr. Petrov.
She turns on her heels, and I follow her downstairs. When I walk into the room, Ivan looks up at me with surprise.
“Winter? You look…well.” I puts his fork down. “And to what do I owe the honor of your company?”
“We need to talk,” I get right down to business.
Ivan gestures towards my old spot. One of his guards helps me sit, and it sends a shiver down my spine and a sting behind my eyes at the memory of Yury doing that for me.
Ivan waits as the maid quickly sets my food in front of me before speaking.
“What did you want to talk about?”
“Releasing me,” I say straightforward, looking him directly in the eye.
“Why?”
“Why not? I’m not serving any purpose. I won’t sing. I won’t willingly come to your bed. I don’t even keep you company. Why not just let me go. Yury’s dead.” The word nearly chokes me as I fight to get around the sudden lump in my throat. “You made sure of that. You took my happiness. Just let me go. Trust me, I’ll be unhappy anywhere I go.”
I finish my speech and wait.
Lucky for him, my scratches healed with little to no permanent damage. I’m ready to try again at his next words.
“No. You’re mine and if I have to keep you for ten years before you realize that, I’ll gladly do it,” Ivan says vindictively.
“You can’t do this! I’m a fucking human being!” I scream and send my chair flying back.
His guard grabs me roughly, and I instantly settle down. I don’t want to do anything that will harm my baby.
“I don’t know how, but someday you’ll pay for this. And I hope I’m there when it happens.”
I spit in his food and stride out the door. The guard following to make sure I head back to my room where he can lock me in for the rest of my days.
I collapse to the floor as the door shuts and locks behind me. I’m terrified for my unborn child. Once Ivan knows, I have no idea what he’ll do to me or my baby.
~~~
I don’t know why I said no. I had been toying with the idea of releasing her. I guess it’s the fact that she’s still in love with him. The beast.
I fume at how she could’ve fallen for him and not me. I have everything. He was nothing. A nobody. Without even a last name to give her.
I’d thought that after I forced him to fuck someone in front of her and to force him to watch me fuck her that it would make them hate each other. It only brought them together, apparently.
No one turns down Ivan Petrov and expects for me to be okay with it.
I toss down my napkin. My appetite is ruined. I need a fucking drink. Her defiance has me rock hard. I have half a mind to go upstairs and take from her what she owes me. I’m not in the habit of fucking unwilling women, but I’m willing to make an exception. Maybe a few stiff drinks will make it easier to fuck her against her will.
She will love me. Even if I have to force her to.
I head to my study, where my fully stocked bar is. Vodka sounds perfect right now.
I walk into the dark room. The only light to illuminate the way is my small old-fashioned desk lamp on my large cherry wood desk.
In the middle of the desk is a s
ingle white rose.
Chapter 27
Four months earlier…
I hear the steady beep of hospital equipment. Then I feel the ripping pain piercing my chest and head. I reach up to touch my head, and a gentle hand stops me.
My eyes flutter open, and I see the pretty face of Winter’s manager, Faith.
“Don’t try to move. You’ll only hurt yourself.”
“W-Where am I?” I ask, and my throat sounds as rough as the night I first spoke.
“You’re at the best hospital in Paris.”
“And Winter?”
“S-She’s gone. Ivan took her back.”
I try to sit up, and pain rips through me.
“No, don’t.” She lays a hand on my chest and lightly presses me back down. “There’s nothing you can do right now. You’re lucky to be alive. He shot you in the head, but luckily the bullet somehow lodged in your skull instead of going all the way through. The doctor thinks that maybe the scar tissue from your past scars and angle it went in slowed the bullet down a bit. It looks like he also tried to aim for your heart and hit one of your lungs instead. The doctors were able to save you before you could drown in your own blood, but you’ve got to get your rest. You need time to heal.”
“I can’t leave her with him. Who knows what he will do when I am not there to protect her.” I say in frustration, though I’m already feeling exhaustion take over me.
“You’ll have to wait until you can regain your strength. Then you can go get her. Now get some rest.” Faith soothes as my eyes droop with fatigue.
~~~
The next couple of days, I come in and out of consciousness. Each time, I panic over Winter. Every time, Faith calms me back down.
This time when my eyes crack open Faith isn’t alone. A female doctor stands at the foot of the bed smiling at me.