by Nicole Dykes
I drop the hand that holds the knife and stare at him blankly, gripping my chest with my left hand, “You scared the hell out me.” I approach him cautiously, “How did you get in here?”
His large hand brushes mine as he gingerly removes my weapon from my hand and places it on the bar. He gives me that sexy smirk, “My mom has a key.” His shoulders shrug, “She trusts me.”
I let out another relieved breath that the bar isn’t being robbed. He holds up the whiskey bottle in front of him, “Join me?”
This seems to be our new thing and after the day he’s had there’s no way I can deny him. I grab another glass from behind the bar and take a seat next to him as he pours the brown liquid into my glass. “Thank you.”
He nods his head and takes a sip of his drink. “Hell of a day, huh?”
I knew there would be some tension with Casey bringing a date, but for some reason I didn’t expect Caleb to do the same and apparently the choice of girl struck a nerve with a lot of people at the table.
“Yes.” I don’t want to pry too much, but my curiosity comes out although I hope I’m being subtle when I say, “Avery seems nice.”
Brady chuckles at that as his hand engulfs the glass on the bar, “She’s not, but she’s a cool chick. I think she’s Caleb’s only hope.”
“Are they close?”
He doesn’t seem to have a problem with my prodding. “They were at one time, but she moved away for a while.” I notice his Adam’s apple bob with a hard gulp after he says that and something in me tells me not to ask.
I move on to a different question I’m dying to know more about. “Do you all know Tori well?”
His eyes darken at the sound of her name and I want to take it back, “We went to high school together. She hates Casey and always has. The feeling is mutual.”
“So they are rivals?”
“Yeah, you could say that. Tori loved to torment Casey when we were in grade school. Gave her shit about her red hair and then when she got braces put on in sixth grade she teased her relentlessly about that. She had a huge crush on Caleb, but he chased after Casey, which only made it worse. Schoolyard bullshit.”
They all have such a deep history here. “That went on for years.” I guess.
“Yeah, Tori never gave up. Every time she ran into Caleb at a party she would be all over him. I’m not really sure of all of the details, but somehow lines were crossed and now here we are.”
I stop the smile that draws at my lips at him sharing all of this with me. “So, Tori is the reason they broke up this time?”
He nods and takes another drink, “She’s a big part of it and he brought her to fucking Thanksgiving dinner.”
He still looks amazed by that. I place my hand on his arm. “Well, maybe getting out of town will help him.”
His eyes meet mine and I see a vulnerability in them that makes me shiver, “It has to. I shouldn’t have let it get this bad. I just want my friend back.”
“It’s not your fault.”
He clears his throat, “At first I just thought it was like any other time they broke up. So I encouraged him to go out, party, get laid. I just assumed they would get back together. I should have tried to stop him sooner. Now who knows if he can go back.”
“He went willingly, right?”
“Yes.”
“Then he wants a change, too. It’ll be great for him. He’ll have a chance to breathe and so will she. They can figure out what they really want.”
He finishes his drink, “You seem to know a lot about that subject. Is that why you are here? Escaping an old lover that broke your heart?”
I shake my head and answer with as much honesty as I can. “No, I’ve never felt the need to leave town to escape a boyfriend. I’ve never cared that much.”
His face scrunches at that revelation. “Never?”
I shake my head. How did we get to talking about me? “No, I’ve had boyfriends, long term boyfriends even, but never had a deep attachment. When we broke up I didn’t feel like I couldn’t breathe around them.”
Please can we talk about anything else? He lets me off the hook, “Yeah, well I can’t believe Casey either. She’s going to get fucking bored as hell with that professor.”
I giggle at that, “He is kind of the opposite of Caleb.”
“He’s the anti-Caleb. I think that is his appeal.”
I nod my head remembering Derek in his suit and tie. “Yeah, probably. Maybe the change will be good for her. Going with the opposite of her normal ‘type’ of guy.”
I don’t really think Casey will be happy with a guy like that deep down. Brady quirks an eyebrow, his voice gravely and strong. “What’s your type, Lilly?”
My heart thumps in my chest, hard and fast. Right now? Light brown hair, blue eyes, strong, masculine and tall. The type of body you only get from years and years of hard labor outdoors. I stutter, “I…um…”
He turns on the barstool so he is facing me completely, “It’s just a question. What kind of men were the guys you dated before?”
His hand moves to my shoulder and he swivels my chair so I’m facing him, “Usually a little older than me, but not by much. Strong and serious types.”
“Like Derek?”
I nod my head, “Yes.”
His face falls closer to mine and his voice is quiet, “Is it time for a change?”
I know I’m breathing way too hard. His face is so close to mine I can’t think. I quickly stand. “I should go.”
I start to walk up to the stairs, but I hear his footsteps behind me. His hand goes to my wrist and he spins me around to face him as I reach the stairway. “Why are you running from me?”
“I was walking.”
He releases my wrist, but then his hands move to cup my face in both hands, “Just talk to me.”
The way he’s looking at me, he doesn’t want to talk. “Brady, I can’t do this.”
“You’re telling me that you don’t want another taste of that first night you were here?”
I do. God my body is humming with his so close to me. “I won’t be here very long.”
His lips brush across mine, making me instantly stupid. “You’ve said that.”
His hands move to my shoulders and mine subconsciously go to his hips. “It’s true.”
“And what else?”
“I don’t do casual. I know that first night I did, but that was the first and only time. I don’t regret it,” I say honestly, “but that doesn’t mean that’s what I want. I can’t turn into Kelly. Desperate. Tracking you down in the middle of the night with blinding jealousy.”
His lips quirk, “I don’t see that happening. You’re nothing like her. Maybe it’s time for a change in type for me too.”
But not an actual change in pattern or behavior. “Brady.”
It’s a meek whisper, a pathetic attempt to ask him not to kiss me, but he sees right through it. I’ve wanted to kiss him again since that first night. His strong arms drop to my waist and he pulls me to him, our lips touching in a feather light embrace.
He pauses. I know what he wants. He needs to know I want this too and God help me I do. For a moment, I let myself be free and grant his hungry mouth access by parting my lips. He takes me in and his mouth swallows mine, his tongue darting in and making me moan from the contact.
I move my fingers upward into his hair, pulling him into an even deeper kiss and his hand cups my ass. He pulls me against his straining erection, lighting my entire body ablaze. I want nothing more than for him to carry me to my bed.
I’ve never felt this intensity, but it’s tainted by the memory of Kelly catching us in an almost kiss last week. I won’t be that girl. I can’t be.
If I give him anymore of myself, soon I won’t have an option.
I push him back gently with my balled hands against his chest. We’re both breathless and panting from the passionate kiss. His forehead touches mine as he looks down, “Don’t do this. I know you want it too.”
/> “I can’t.”
With that I move out of his arms, their presence is instantly missed, but I stay strong and I walk up the stairs silently. I can feel his eyes on me the entire time, but I don’t turn around.
Chapter 21
Brady
I watch Lilly walk up the stairs and disappear into her apartment. I fight the urge to go bang on her door. I feel pretty confident that I can convince her to give in to what I know she wants. Especially after that kiss. This attraction between us is obvious. If she’s leaving soon, what’s the point in denying it?
Instead of banging on her door though, I put the bottle of whiskey back up and leave the bar. Lilly Benson might be the woman I want, but she’s not the woman I can have. I shouldn’t let myself dwell on that. And I won’t.
I drive around town a little while, listening to sad country songs on the radio and trying to figure out exactly what it is that I want to do. Without Caleb here, I’m restless. I’m not ready to go home yet. I don’t have any shells in my truck for target practice so that’s a no-go. I honestly thought by going to Jack’s that I would have a few drinks with Lilly and she would stop fighting what we both know we want to happen. But no.
Fuck she looked hot, even wielding a steak knife. Her long, damp hair falling down over her shoulders. Her thin t-shirt that made it obvious she wasn’t wearing a bra. The short cotton shorts she had on. Shit.
I turn down Horton Street and a few seconds later, pull into Kelly’s driveway. Her lights are off, but I’ve shown up at her house later than this. When she opens the door, she’s wearing a pink silk robe and rubbing her eyes.
“Brady? What time is it?” she asks.
“You gonna let me in?”
She pushes the door open and I saunter inside. I don’t give her much time to react before I haul her against me. She wraps her legs around my waist and I grip her bare ass as I carry her to her room, still worked up from my encounter at the bar.
I toss her down to her bed and she makes quick work of discarding her robe. I can’t turn into Kelly. Lilly’s voice invades my mind. I look down at the woman lying before me. Her eagerness is evident as she reaches for my jeans. She would do anything for me. The guilt that hits me is overwhelming.
“Kelly, wait.” I still her hands and stand up. “I can’t. I…can’t do this.”
“Of course, you can. We’ve been doing this for months, Brady.” she argues.
I run a hand through my hair and apologize to her. “I shouldn’t have strung you along like this.”
Kelly grabs her robe and slips it back on, but doesn’t tie it. She crawls to the edge of the bed and stands on her knees. Her hands roam over my chest, trying to lift my t-shirt up.
“Brady, you haven’t strung me along. I’ve known what this is and I still want it.” she assures me.
“You want more than what this is, Kelly.” I stop her. “And I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. We can’t do this again.”
Even as the words are coming out of my mouth, I’m shocked that I’m saying them. I never have any trouble screwing a girl and walking out. I’m up front and honest with her that it’s all I can give. I thought Jade was different and we were exclusive, but I still wasn’t ready for anything serious with her. I don’t know that I’ll ever be ready for anything compared to what her and Madden have. I just don’t think I’m built that way. Yet, here I am, ending things with my fuck buddy.
I step away from the bed and head towards the door. The pillow Kelly throws hits me square in the back. What the fuck?
“Brady Thompson, you get your ass back in here and fuck me right now!” she screams. “Right now, Brady!”
I keep walking and another pillow whizzes by my head. I laugh at her silly antics. “Good night, Kelly.”
Chapter 22
Lillian
Normally I’m really smart. I swear I am. I’m logical at least when it comes to matters of the heart. I always assumed I would end up with someone that my father approved of, more than likely a doctor. I would become a doctor, also, and we would see each other when we could between our busy schedules. I thought that’s what I wanted.
Now with my parent’s secret out, I’m more lost than I’ve ever been. I still don’t blame them, but it feels like my whole life has been a lie. I don’t know who I am, who or what I want out of life either. Although if I’m being totally honest with myself, maybe something always felt a little off.
Staring over at Brady Thompson, sipping his beer and casually talking to Madden, Landon, Keegan, and Amelia, my stupid heart flutters in my chest and I think about that kiss last night. How the hell does he kiss like that? In a way that makes me feel like I’m the only one he wants and that he can’t get enough.
Of course, logically when it was over, I knew that wasn’t true. Brady Thompson is casual. I’m not even close to the only girl he wants and if he can get enough of an awesome girl like Jade, I’m sure he can get enough of me and toss me to the side too.
He winks over at me and it does exactly what he meant it to. It flusters the hell out of me. Totally busted, I look away and go back to gathering my drink order. It’s getting late on Friday night and the bar will be closing soon.
Casey still has the night off, but she’s here with Derek at their own private booth. The university is closed today for Thanksgiving Break. I wonder how she’s doing with Caleb’s departure.
I don’t have to wait long to find out. After I deliver my drink order and rejoin Jade at the bar, who is busy settling tabs, Casey walks over and plops down on the stool across from us.
Jade thanks an older gentleman who places his wallet in his back pocket, tips his hat and walks away. Then her eyes go straight to Casey, “Where’s Derek?”
“He had to get going back to Redbud.”
“How are things going with him?” The question comes from Jade and I think maybe I should leave to let them talk. “He seems nice, right Lilly?”
Jade nudges me, “Yes, he does and obviously smart.”
Casey takes a sip of the beer Jade put in front of her, “Yeah, he’s super smart and good looking and mature. Which is nice for a change.”
She isn’t bragging, her words are distant when she speaks about him. “Well, change can be good.” I say as I think back to my conversation with Brady last night.
There is a sadness in Casey’s eyes for a brief second and then she peps up, “Are you kiddin’? It’s amazing! We actually have real conversations and haven’t had an argument yet. We’ve only been seeing each other for a few weeks, but that’s still better than what I’m used to.”
I see the worry on Jade’s face. “So, you’re okay with Caleb going to L.A?”
Casey stands up, leaving the empty beer bottle on the bar, “Uh yeah, L.A. can have him. See ya’ll tomorrow.”
We both nod and say our goodbyes before she walks out of the bar, her and Brady ignoring each other as she walks by him. I turn to Jade, “She isn’t okay, is she?”
Jade’s head shakes, “No, but I think this break will be really good for both of them. She really does like Derek so I guess only time will tell. He may end up being the best thing for her.”
I smile at her as we start to clean up. The only customers left are Brady’s table. When we are done, we join them. I sit next to Jade and Logan, but Brady is almost directly across from me at the circular table.
“So, I hear I missed one hell of a Thanksgiving, Jade.” Logan says, grinning as he drinks his beer.
Jade groans, “Oh yeah, it didn’t exactly go how I wanted my first Thanksgiving hosting to go, but I guess it all worked out.”
I notice Brady’s intense gaze on me and I try to gage what he is thinking, but I have no idea. Is he thinking about our kiss? About Caleb? I wonder where he went after he left the bar last night. I tossed and turned for hours after I pushed him away. Did he find another woman to join him? Maybe Kelly?
Jealousy runs through me at that thought. I know I have no right to be jealous when I was the one th
at pushed him away, but he makes me crazy.
“So, when do you guys head back?” His attention moves from me to Landon, Keegan, and Amelia.
Amelia is the one to answer the question. “Sunday night. If it were up to Landon we would be gone already.”
Landon grins, “Hey, I have shit to do.”
Madden laughs, “Always. Take a damn break for once. Relax.”
Landon shakes his head. I notice his perfect posture as he sits in the chair. I’ve noticed they all have it, bred into them, but Madden’s body is leaned over with his arm around Jade. Keegan is sitting a little straighter with his hand in Amelia’s. I wonder when my older brother is going to find someone to loosen him up a little. He definitely needs it.
I smile to myself, I’m one to talk. I’m already a nagging sister, worried about him constantly working and not having any personal time. It’s so bizarre.
“Since you’re stuck here anyway. You should come out with us tomorrow.” Brady says, gesturing toward Madden.
Jade huffs, “And where are you going tomorrow?”
Madden kisses her nose, “Four wheeling.”
Brady nods, “No chicks allowed.” I roll my eyes and he grins over at me. “Unless you ladies don’t mind getting a little dirty. I don’t want to hear anyone whining about getting their boots muddy.”
My face heats at the word dirty. He looked straight into my eyes when he said it and I don’t think he was talking about mud. Still I’m not backing down from his blatant challenge, “Well, I’m in.”
Jade looks over at me like she’s surprised, “Have you been before?”
They all think of me as an uptight city girl. Can’t blame them, since I am, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to explore new things. Now more than ever I want to find out what I truly like. “No, but I’d love to go.”
Jade beams over at me with pride, “I’m in too.” Her head turns to Amelia, “What about you?”
At least Amelia has a similar background to me. She looks slightly nervous, “I’ll go.”