by Cox, Carrie;
As we walked along the basket kept hitting my shins. It was really starting to annoy me.
“Do you need me to carry it?” Jack asked.
Was he crazy? He was on crutches! “I’m good, thanks.”
We’d been walking for only two or three minutes, when the picnic basket hit my knee and my foot caught on a stupid tree root at the same time. I was starting to think this basket had some kind of vendetta against me, and I couldn’t break my fall because both hands were occupied with the dumb basket.
I let out a totally unglamorous squeak and pitched forward head first.
I had no idea how he did it, but Jack managed to catch me before my head hit a tree trunk.
I got to my knees as Jack leaned on one of his crutches and supported me with his other arm. It didn’t take long for my dazed brain to realize that I was on my knees and my head was directly opposite the fly of his jeans.
And as my eyes slowly and lazily traveled up his body, I couldn’t help but think how easy it would be to stay on my knees in front of him and reach out to unbutton… I blushed furiously.
When my eyes eventually traveled up to his face, I saw him grinning, really mischievously, like he knew exactly what was on my mind and he was quite aware of the affect he had on me.
He cupped my elbow with one of his hands and helped me to my feet. This was dangerous territory. I was too close to him. I knew that, but I couldn’t step back.
I could smell the clean, warm scent of his skin and something minty on his breath. I let out a shaky breath. My face was literally inches from his. My eyes were fixed on his lips. I should have moved away, but I didn’t.
I was frozen and that was when it happened.
He leaned in, millimeter by millimeter, in agonizing slow motion, until finally, his soft, smooth lips touched mine. It was barely a kiss, more of a caress, as his lips covered my mouth.
I didn’t stand a chance. I kissed him back. My tongue touched his and it was like a bolt of electricity lit up every nerve in my body.
It felt so good … but I should not be doing this. This was definitely a bad idea.
Reluctantly, I came to my senses and took a step back.
I looked up into his face, and then I wished I hadn’t. His whole face had darkened with desire. His eyes burned into mine.
He was no longer the light-hearted, teasing version of Jack. The intensity in his gaze sucked me in, and I wondered what it would be like to give myself to him completely.
“Hey,” I said, trying to get some control back. “What are you doing, are you crazy?”
“You let me kiss you,” he said. His voice was so low and sexy it sent tremors straight to my stomach and lower down.
I pretended to be outraged. “You took me by surprise.” I could feel the heat traveling up to my chest and then my cheeks. I was blushing again.
“You look so sexy when you’re taken by surprise.”
My mouth dropped open. He was teasing me again, damn it.
He grinned, and I broke eye contact. If I looked into those eyes again, I’d be lost.
“I’ll tell you one thing, Jack Harding,” I said, folding my arms across my chest. “You’re definitely not backwards in coming forwards.”
He laughed. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“I don’t know.” I frowned. It was something my mother used to say about me. “It’s an old saying. It means you’re a bit too forward.”
“Well I suppose that’s better than being backwards,” he said.
He reached out and held on to my index finger, and my hand entwined in his. Just that simple touch had me wanting more. Much more. My head was spinning.
I pulled away, stuffing my hands in my pockets. “Let’s get to this stream and have some lunch,” I said, forcing myself to keep my voice calm and level.
He sighed and pointed off to the right with one of his crutches. “It’s this way.”
14
Jack told the truth when he said the stream wasn’t much further. We reached it in about five minutes, and it really was beautiful. The water trickled down over a series of rocks, producing a miniature waterfall. The smell of the forest around us was fresh and green; it was like a fairy tale forest. The stream widened and opened up into a beautiful pool as we walked further down.
Unlike back in the garden where the sun was baking down, the air here was cooler, but I still felt hot and sticky. I imagined stripping off and taking a dip in the cool water.
“Wow,” I said. “You were right. It is beautiful.” I walked over to the stream and trailed my hand in the cool, crystal clear water, and then looked back at Jack over my shoulder. “Is it safe to swim? Have you ever swum here?”
He was looking at me again in that heated intense way he had.
“All the time, when we were kids,” he said.
“I’ll have to bring my bathing suit another time.”
“Well, you could always skinny dip,” Jack said and gave me a wink. “I won’t tell anyone.”
I grinned despite my best intentions. “Yeah,” I said. “That’s not going to happen.”
He shrugged and grinned back. “Shame.”
I set up the picnic basket and pulled out the lunch that Maria had helped me put together in the kitchen that morning. We had chicken legs, salad and sandwiches to go with our alcohol-free wine.
As I poured our wine into little plastic goblets, I screwed up my face. I’d had alcohol-free wine before and I hadn’t been particularly enamored with it. But as Jack had taken those strong pain-killers yesterday, real wine wasn’t an option. Unfortunately.
“Wine?” Jack took the plastic goblet enthusiastically.
“Maria found it for me. It’s alcohol-free.”
Jack gave me a look. I didn’t think he was impressed.
“It’s actually pretty good,” I said and took another sip. It wasn’t very cold, but other than that I couldn’t say anything bad about it. It tasted real enough to me.
We chatted over lunch, and I made sure the conversation stayed away from any kind of innuendo that could get me in trouble. I also carefully diverted Jack off the subject of my past, which basically meant, I grilled Jack for an hour about Monaco and his career.
I first realized something was not quite right just after we drained the last drops of the wine.
I was feeling a happy, warm glow…the kind of feeling I got after drinking a couple of glasses of normal wine.
But Jack… Well, there was no two ways about it. He was drunk. Seriously tipsy.
“Shit,” I said and grabbed up the bottle. The name and description of the wine was written in French. Was this normal wine? It had to be. Holy crap. I was in trouble.
“We better get back,” I said.
“No, no, I want to stay here,” he said, clumsily grabbing my arm and pulling me towards him.
“It’s nice just being here with you,” he said and my heart flipped flopped.
Don’t take this seriously, my inner voice ordered. He’s drunk and you are the only female around. Don’t go thinking you’re anything special.
My inner voice is a total bitch.
Jack still had his fingers clasped around my wrist. I was sure he could feel that my pulse rate had spiked.
“It’s nice forgetting about everything,” he said. “I can feel almost normal.”
He pulled me forward, so I was practically sitting in his lap. Damn, he was strong.
“So this is normal for you?” I said. “Taking women down to your secret stream and suggesting they go skinny dipping?”
I was trying to be flippant, hoping he wouldn’t notice how his words affected me.
He laughed and reached up a hand to my cheek and traced my jaw softly with his finger. He then took my hand and pressed my palm to his lips. It sent tingles all the way up my arm and through my body. I could feel the heat growing inside me. How did he do it? A few simple touches and I was putty in his hands.
I tried to pull my hand away, but he held
on to it.
I didn’t think he realized what he was doing to me. I was so close to him right now, and it would be so easy to just lean and kiss those delicious lips again. To trace my tongue along his lower lip, to taste him.
But somehow I held back. Somehow I remembered that I was supposed to be here doing a job. One that I’d not been doing very well so far.
I had to be the worst care-giver in history. Yesterday I let him overdo things and he ended up in agony and today I’d got him drunk.
Could I be any worse at this job?
But he was not giving up.
He pulled me closer towards him, so now I really was sitting on his lap. I didn’t know what to do, or where to put my hands. I mean, I knew where I wanted to put my hands… but that was another story.
“Just sit here for a while and pretend,” he murmured.
“Pretend what?” I asked, with a shaky voice. Being this close to him was driving me crazy. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me tight and it was the best feeling in the world. I could feel the steady beat of his heart. At least his was steady, mine was racing. The warm scent of him was all over me. I wanted to lean forward and drink him in. My fingers itched with temptation… to touch… to feel. I clenched my fists. No, this wasn’t right.
His eyes were closed as he said, “Pretend you like me, pretend I’m not broken …a cripple. Just pretend…”
I stiffened in his arms. “What are you talking about? You’re not a cripple and that’s a horrible word.”
“Pretend I’m not damaged then.”
“You’re not damaged, Jack. You’re going to be fine.”
Jack sighed and looked at me sadly. “So you can’t even pretend, not even for five minutes?”
My God, his eyes. I could drown in those deep, dark eyes.
I didn’t know what game he was playing. It had to be obvious to him how much I liked him. I blushed at whatever innuendo he mentioned. I got all shaky whenever I was around him. There’s no way he couldn’t have noticed… not after the massage… It was impossible.
I didn’t know why he was playing with my feelings like this. I liked happy, teasing Jack, I wanted him back. I didn’t want to deal with melancholy, drunk Jack.
I pushed his silky, dark hair back out of his eyes. “Do you know what, Jack? You’re drunk.”
The look of shock on his face was comical.
“I am not,” he said, slurring his words. “That’s ridiculous. You said it was alcohol-free. Besides, I’ve only had two glasses. I can hold my licq…lick…” He paused for a moment, took a deep breath then said, “I can hold my alcohol.”
I couldn’t help it then. I giggled and laughed. Really laughed for the first time in ages, and it felt good.
Jack just looked at me as if I was crazy, but he kept a smile on his face, too.
“What?” I asked.
“You know you look beautiful when you smile. You should do it more often.”
My breath caught in my throat at his words. I bit my lip. I’d love to believe him. I’d love to stay there with him for hours. Instead, I bent down and started gathering up all our cutlery and paper plates from our picnic.
“We better get back, Jack. Everyone will wonder where we’ve gone.”
“You know what I think?” Jack said.
“What’s that, mister?” I said, expecting him to say something silly and teasing again.
“I think you like me, despite your best efforts not to.”
I didn’t look at him. I couldn’t. I just concentrated packing everything up in neat piles and then putting them back into the picnic basket.
Finally, I stood up. “You know what, Jack?”
“What?”
“You think too much, that’s your problem.”
He collapsed into a fit of giggles, and I couldn’t help it. I laughed with him.
We started walking back, and he stumbled a couple of times on his crutches, but thankfully he didn’t do any damage.
When we made it out of the woods, I looked up at the sky.
Oh, my God. How was I going to get Jack back in the house without anyone seeing him and without anyone realizing I’d got him drunk?
“You know, I think you might be right. I might be a little tipsy,” he said with a grin as we got closer to the spot where we’d left the wheelchair.
“What would my brother say if he knew you were getting me drunk? Were you planning to take advantage of me, Nurse Kristina?”
“You wish,” I said, trying not to blush. “Now hurry up.”
He wasn’t walking in a straight line.
“Are you sure your legs don’t hurt?” I asked.
He shook his head, “They’re fine. But I still can’t believe you took me out here and got me drunk to take advantage of me.”
“Shut up!” I said blushing furiously, “I thought it was alcohol-free!”
Jack grinned as he walked beside me, refusing to get back in the chair. I knew he was only teasing me, but I was really worried that somebody would see us and report this to Alexander.
15
It took us ages to get back because Jack was weaving about from side to side, and he refused to get back into the wheelchair. So I had to push the chair back to the house while he wove about on his crutches. But luckily, we managed to get back inside without anyone seeing us.
As soon as we got home, he slumped on his bed and fell fast asleep.
I sighed with relief and hoped I’d gotten away with it. I was worried about the effects of alcohol combined with the painkillers, so I fished out the bottle from the bathroom cabinet and read the label. There were no warnings on the label.
But I couldn’t risk it. I had to get medical advice. It might get me in trouble but I couldn’t risk anything happening to Jack.
I phoned Brian.
“Uh, hi Brian … It’s Kristina… I’ve done something pretty stupid. I took Jack out for a picnic lunch and we had wine…I thought it was alcohol free but…”
“How much has he had?” Brian’s tone was abrupt and I winced, but I knew I deserved it.
“Two glasses. He seemed pretty drunk. He’s fallen asleep now. I’m really sorry. It was such a dumb thing to do.”
“Jack’s an adult, Kristina. He makes his own choices.” Brian’s words didn’t make me feel any better. “Has he been sick?”
“No we just got home and he fell asleep pretty much straightaway.”
“I don’t think two glasses will have done any damage. The tablets have just lowered his normal resistance to alcohol. Keep an eye on him. If you’re worried or if he gets worse, call me.”
“Ok, thanks,” I said meekly and hung up the phone, feeling like the stupidest person on the planet.
I made a pot of extra strong coffee for when Jack woke up, and poured a cup for myself. I took mine into the bedroom and sat on the wing-backed chair beside his bed to watch him sleep.
I guessed he would think I was a total weirdo when he woke up and found me watching over him, but I couldn’t let him out of my sight.
His face relaxed as he slept, making him appear younger than he was. His beautiful dark lashes rested on his tanned cheek. There was the tiniest amount of dark stubble along his jawline, and I imagined running my lips along his cheek, anticipating the raspy feel against my lips.
I was in trouble.
I really liked him, and I had no idea what to do about it. I mean, of course I knew what I should do. I should pack my bags and get the hell away from him before I fell any deeper. This wouldn’t end well.
For one thing, he was way out of my league. He was a world famous racing driver who could have any woman he wanted, and if I was to believe my internet searches, he had had most of the eligible women in his social circle.
But I didn’t want to give up. For the first time in years, I actually felt like I was doing something good with my life, like I was heading in the right direction. I needed to stay professional and help Jack, but I couldn’t get too close.
&nb
sp; I had already been broken once. I couldn’t afford to get my heart broken, too.
After Jack woke up, he drank the coffee I gave him — two strong cups straight down — and smiled at me a little sheepishly.
“I’m a cheap date, huh? Half a bottle of wine?”
“It was the tablets,” I said. “I shouldn’t have let you have any wine. I really did think it was alcohol-free. I’m so sorry.”
He frowned. “Don’t be ridiculous. It wasn’t your fault.”
“But I’m supposed to be taking care of you. I shouldn’t have taken the risk. It is my fault. You could have gotten really sick.”
“No, I’m an adult,” he said. “I can make my own decisions.”
“But I’m here to look after you and make sure things like this don’t happen.”
“That’s not what you’re here for.”
I frowned. “What do you mean?”
He wasn’t making any sense. Of course that was what I was here for. It was my job.
But he didn’t reply. He just shook his head. “I’m going to have a shower,” he said. “I think I’ll have dinner with you and Alexander tonight.”
For a moment I was lost for words, then a grin spread across my face. This was a step in the right direction, but I didn’t want to make a big deal over it, in case he backed out.
“Okay. I’m sure Alexander will be pleased.”
This was awesome progress. Alexander was apparently always trying to get Jack to come to dinner and Jack usually refused and ate by himself, so this was a good sign.
I bustled around the apartment, tidying things up, plumping pillows and humming to myself. I was in a ridiculously good mood. I knew exactly what was causing my good mood, and I knew exactly why I was feeling like this.
But it was no good, I couldn’t fight it.
I was falling for Jack Harding.
I hadn’t completely lost my mind. I was fully aware it couldn’t end well. Despite that, my stupid mood refused to fall, and for the rest of the afternoon, I walked around with a daft smile on my lips.