46.
The Desire of Anaitis
And again Koshchei waved his hand. Then came to Jurgen a woman whowas strangely gifted and perverse. Her dark eyes glittered: upon herhead was a net-work of red coral, with branches radiating downward,and her tunic was of two colors, being shot with black and crimsoncuriously mingled.
And Anaitis also had forgotten Jurgen, or else she did not recognizehim in this man of forty and something: and again belief awoke inJurgen's heart that this was the only woman whom Jurgen had reallyloved, as he listened to Anaitis and to her talk of marvelousthings.
Of the lore of Thais she spoke, and of the schooling of Sappho, andof the secrets of Rhodope, and of the mourning for Adonis: and therefrain of all her talking was not changed. "For we have but alittle while to live, and none knows his fate thereafter. So that aman possesses nothing certainly save a brief loan of his own body:and yet the body of man is capable of much curious pleasure. As thusand thus," says she. And the bright-colored pensive woman spoke withantique directness of matters that Jurgen, being no longer ascapegrace of twenty-one, found rather embarrassing.
"Come, come!" thinks he, "but it will never do to seem provincial. Ibelieve that I am actually blushing."
Aloud he said: "Sweetheart, there was--why, not a half-hoursince!--a youth who sought quite zealously for the over-masteringfrenzies you prattle about. But, candidly, he could not find theflesh whose touch would rouse insanity. The lad had opportunities,too, let me tell you! Hah, I recall with tenderness the glitter ofeyes and hair, and the gay garments, and the soft voices of thosefond foolish women, even now. But he went from one pair of lips toanother, with an ardor that was always half-feigned, and withprotestations which were conscious echoes of some romance or other.Such escapades were pleasant enough: but they were not very serious,after all. For these things concerned his body alone: and I am morethan an edifice of viands reared by my teeth. To pretend that whatmy body does or endures is of importance seems rather sillynowadays. I prefer to regard it as a necessary beast of burden whichI maintain, at considerable expense and trouble. So I shall make nomore pother about it."
But then again Queen Anaitis spoke of marvelous things; and helistened, fair-mindedly; for the Queen spoke now of that which washers to share with him.
"Well, I have heard," says Jurgen, "that you have a notableresidence in Cocaigne."
"But that is only a little country place, to which I sometimesrepair in summer, in order to live rustically. No, Jurgen, you mustsee my palaces. In Babylon I have a palace where many abide withcords about them and burn bran for perfume, while they await thatthing which is to befall them. In Armenia I have a palace surroundedby vast gardens, where only strangers have the right to enter: theythere receive a hospitality that is more than gallant. In Paphos Ihave a palace wherein is a little pyramid of white stone, verycurious to see: but still more curious is the statue in my palace atAmathus, of a bearded woman, which displays other features thatwomen do not possess. And in Alexandria I have a palace that istended by thirty-six exceedingly wise and sacred persons, andwherein it is always night: and there folk seek for monstrouspleasures, even at the price of instant death, and win to both ofthese swiftly. Everywhere my palaces stand upon high places near thesea: so they are beheld from afar by those whom I hold dearest, mybeautiful broad-chested mariners, who do not fear even me, but knowthat in my palaces they will find notable employment. For I musttell you of what is to be encountered within these places that aremine, and of how pleasantly we pass our time there." Then she toldhim.
Now he listened more attentively than ever, and his eyes werenarrowed, and his lips were lax and motionless and foolish-looking,and he was deeply interested. For Anaitis had thought of some newdiversions since their last meeting: and to Jurgen, even at fortyand something, this queen's voice was all a horrible and strange andlovely magic. "She really tempts very nicely, too," he reflected,with a sort of pride in her.
Then Jurgen growled and shook himself, half angrily: and he tweakedthe ear of Queen Anaitis.
"Sweetheart," says he, "you paint a glowing picture: but you areshrewd enough to borrow your pigments from the day-dreams ofinexperience. What you prattle about is not at all as you describeit. You forget you are talking to a widely married man of variedexperience. Moreover, I shudder to think of what might happen ifLisa were to walk in unexpectedly. And for the rest, all this to-doover nameless delights and unspeakable caresses and other anonymousantics seems rather naive. My ears are beset by eloquent gray hairswhich plead at closer quarters than does that fibbing little tongueof yours. And so be off with you!"
With that Queen Anaitis smiled very cruelly, and she said: "Farewellto you, then Jurgen, for it is I that am leaving you forever.Henceforward you must fret away much sunlight by interminablyshunning discomfort and by indulging tepid preferences. For I, andnone but I, can waken that desire which uses all of a man, and sowastes nothing, even though it leave that favored man forever afterlike wan ashes in the sunlight. And with you I have no more concern,for it is I that am leaving you forever. Join with your grayingfellows, then! and help them to affront the clean sane sunlight, bymaking guilds and laws and solemn phrases wherewith to rid the worldof me. I, Anaitis, laugh, and my heart is a wave in the sunlight.For there is no power like my power, and no living thing which canwithstand my power; and those who deride me, as I well know, are butthe dead dry husks that a wind moves, with hissing noises, while Iharvest in open sunlight. For I am the desire that uses all of aman: and it is I that am leaving you forever."
Said Jurgen: "I could not see all this in you, not quite all this,because of a shadow that followed me. Now it is too late, and thisis a sorrowful thing which is happening. I am become as a puzzledghost who furtively observes the doings of loud-voiced ruddypersons: and I am compact of weariness and apprehension, for I nolonger discern what thing is I, nor what is my desire, and I fearthat I am already dead. So farewell to you, Queen Anaitis, for this,too, is a sorrowful thing and a very unfair thing that ishappening."
Thus he cried farewell to the Sun's daughter. And all the colors ofher loveliness flickered and merged into the likeness of a tall thinflame, that aspired; and then this flame was extinguished.
Jurgen: A Comedy of Justice Page 48