“I remember,” he says on cue, and my heart thaws more toward him. He reaches across the center console and squeezes my leg. “Why did you come back?”
I look over my shoulder, finding Em asleep, so I turn my eyes to Brad, who I find is checking on her in the rearview mirror, too. At this rate, my heart will be leaping out of my chest and into his hands before we hit his parents’ house.
“My sister had promised to help me, but that was short-lived. She vanished before I delivered. Actually, the day I went into labor she disappeared. The nurse kept trying to call her, but she never picked up. I delivered Em by myself with a nurse holding my hand.”
I hear his quick intake of breath next to me. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel sorry for me.”
He shakes his head and his eyes focus on the road in front of us. “I wish things would have been different. The thought of you by yourself is hard to swallow.”
It had been excruciating at the time. I never thought we’d get through it, but we did. “It was my own doing.” I cross my legs and shift them toward the window, because if he tries to console me now, I’m fairly sure my willpower will wane.
“No one deserves to go through that alone. I wish you would have told me.”
But I didn’t and I can’t change that fact, so I don’t respond and he seems to drop the topic.
“I told my parents about Emerson. You should be prepared by knowing that Tanner’s parents live next to mine, so they might come by too. It might be awkward at first.”
“Were your parents upset that they are just finding out now?” I feel like my lungs are on fire and I can’t catch my breath from the anxiety resting in my chest.
“A little. I explained the situation, but I’ll run interference if need be.”
“Brad, maybe I shouldn’t go.” I turn my body to face him. I don’t do confrontation well, and it sounds like there could be an altercation. The last thing I can deal with is Brad fighting with his parents.
“Don’t be silly. They’ll forgive and forget.” He waves me off. I’m guessing they’ve forgiven and forgotten his mistakes.
His hand on my thigh pulls me from my thoughts. “Hey, don’t worry. I promise my parents are as great as me. Hell, they raised me. They know what a screwup I am, so don’t worry. Plus, I’ll never let them treat you bad. Not that they would. Fuck, listen to me ramble.” He shakes his head as though that will stop his mouth from moving.
“Okay.” What else could I say at this point?
“Do you remember Bea from college? Piper’s friend?”
The sassy blonde that always made rude comments to me. How could I forget? “Yeah.”
“She and Tanner’s brother, Dylan, have some screwed and weird thing going on, so they might join us for dinner one night.”
“Great.” Too bad the sarcasm didn’t leave my tone before the word came out.
Brad looks over and smiles. “I gotcha. Don’t worry.”
No matter how many times he promises it, my level of anxiety continues to rise. I can’t help thinking, what did I sign myself up for?
Brad
IF I THOUGHT FACING MY parents after I decided to call off my wedding to Bayli was appalling, walking in with Taylor and Emerson is dreadful. My parents didn’t say much when I told them over the phone, which means in the hours since, they could have turned either angry or understanding. You never can tell with them. In the end, they’re both usually even-keeled, and give Piper and me the benefit of the doubt.
I drive through downtown, passing Carsen’s Steakhouse, and check to see Emerson’s head slumped over.
“Is that okay?” I nod my head toward the back of the car and Taylor checks on her.
She shifts back to fix our daughter’s head. Her breasts press against my arm and my hand tightens on the steering wheel. It’s bad enough she’s wearing tight-ass skinny pants that show off every damn curve she’s developed after having Emerson, now all I can imagine is her pebbled nipples that always looked like little kisses, begging me to devour them.
Emerson mumbles something and shifts her head to the other side while Taylor settles back into the passenger seat, fastening her seatbelt. I try not to stare at the view of her separated breasts the seatbelt causes. Instead I stare forward, weaving through the backstreets to my parents’ house.
“You grew up here?” She stares out the window, admiring the downtown houses. Hearthwood isn’t as small as Roosevelt, but believe me, everyone knows everyone. Especially when you call off your engagement and your biggest mistakes are stationed on every news channel. When your best friend makes the Olympics and you don’t, it’s known.
“Yeah. Down that street is my high school.” I take a sharp turn left, detouring us. “I’ll show you.”
A minute later, I’m parked in the lot of my high school where GO COUGARS is painted on the side of the pool house. All my dreams sprouted from my freshman year in that water, got me a scholarship to Michigan along with Tanner. I always thought we were equal, but if I’m honest with myself, which I rarely ever am, he’s always been a faster swimmer than me. His form perfected well before mine did.
“Nice,” she says, looking at the sporadic cars in the parking lot.
I do a quick U-turn, suddenly not liking memory lane.
“Yeah. That’s where I became the man I am,” I joke to dodge any emotions she might be able to sense.
Her hand grips my bicep. “I can’t imagine you without these.”
She’s a damn ego boost, and there was a time I convinced myself the only reason I fell in love with her was because she was gracious with the compliments. Oh, how wrong I was.
Her hand rests on my forearm and I know she’s not done with trying to pry me open.
“You know you can talk to me, right? That I’d never judge you.” There it is, the real reason I love her. She actually gives a shit about me. Took me too damn long to figure that one out.
“I know.” My eyes fixate on the cracks on the road. There’s a zillion things I want to tell her, but not when I’m a minute away from my parents’ house. I need to armor the façade before going into my childhood home. Eventually, her hand ventures back over to her lap and the despair I don’t want anyone to find out about slithers back down.
Silence takes over the car for the rest of the drive. I turn into my parents’ neighborhood and Taylor gasps.
“Brad?” she asks, and I should have warned her, but how do I do that when to me it’s no big deal? But Taylor has always been hung up on money.
“Relax.” Her hand grips the car door handle as she peers out to the houses on the hills. It’s not like my family has Bayli’s kind of money. I think Taylor would throw up if she saw their mansion.
“I figured, but this is just—” Fear strikes her beautiful blue eyes and I wish I could calm her down from the panic attack she’s about to have.
“It’s just a house.” I try my best to ease her concern, but her body is becoming defensive as she twists and turns like a damn pretzel. She stares back at Emerson and I fear she’s developing an escape plan.
I pull into the driveway, and the first thing I notice is the pool, which is covered up for the winter, but I know the hot tub is good to go. Maybe with some convincing, I can get Taylor in there at some point.
We park under the basketball hoop and I take her hands in mine. “My parents are normal, okay? I promise you, whatever you are thinking isn’t the case. Like I said, I’m here for you. No one will treat you like less than a princess.” I wink and her shoulders relax a little.
“I have to tell you something,” she spits out at the same time as the garage door opens. Should have known my mom would be peering out the window, waiting on us.
I look up to find my parents approaching the truck, and then back to her. “Can it wait?”
Her face pales, but she nods, uncertainty occupying her eyes.
“Just be yourself, I know they’ll love you.” I squeeze her hands, turn off the engine, and climb
out.
“Brad,” my mom says first. There’s a light smile on her face, and I relax, realizing she’s going to be on my side with this one.
“Hey, Mom.” I wrap my arms around her thin frame and lift her feet off the ground.
She smacks my shoulders to place her feet back down, which I do. My dad approaches, holding his hand out to me. He bears that stern face, like the time I got caught drinking at a high school party by the cops. He’s not on my side, but he shakes my hand and pulls me into a hug anyway.
“Hey, Dad,” I say, and he pats my back but says nothing.
Taylor rounds the back of my car and the air becomes charged with tension. Her eyes concentrate on me, and I smile to ease her apprehension. Her shoulder brushes mine and I swing my arm around her shoulders.
“Mom, Dad, this is Taylor.” My mom steps closer to my dad and they each smile. Good sign.
“Hi, Taylor,” my mom says, and holds her hand out.
“Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Ashby.” She’s so cute I could kiss her senseless.
“You can call us Chris and Maggie,” my mom continues to be the communicator.
“Emerson is sleeping,” I say right as a little hand slaps the window.
“Mama,” she whines, and Taylor moves out of my hold to open the door. Once Emerson appears, my mom sucks in a quick inhale of breath.
Taylor unbuckles her and sweeps Emerson into her arms. My little girl’s eyes observe her new surroundings, gracing me with a small smile before burying her head in Taylor’s chest.
“She doesn’t wake up well,” Taylor excuses, and her hand automatically soothes her back. “It will just take a few minutes.”
“Come on, let’s go inside.” I wave my hand in the air.
My parents lead the way while I wait for Taylor to walk in front of me. She bites her lip and glances at Emerson clinging to her like a life raft.
By the time we enter the house, my parents are in the kitchen and are laying out a spread of sandwich meats out for us. A highchair sits in the corner and a floor full of toys in the middle of the family room.
“You guys have been busy,” I say, and my mom smiles.
“I didn’t want you guys to be inconvenienced.” Mom’s fingers fiddle with a napkin, her eyes fixated on Emerson. “I hope you don’t mind, Taylor.”
Taylor’s eyes widen.
“Not at all. Thank you.” They share a smile and I have to think this is a good sign.
Emerson peeks up, but quickly buries her head back into her chest and Taylor sighs. I reach out to Emerson, but she shakes her head. Although a flash of tension runs through me at first, I push it back because she’s just a little girl who wants her mommy.
My dad moves to the fridge. “Did you guys want something to drink?”
“I’ll take a water, Dad,” I answer.
“Taylor?” he asks, and her body relaxes a little more.
“Water would be great, thank you.” My dad brings over the waters, opening Taylor’s for her since Em’s wrapped around her like a koala bear. “Thank you.” My dad nods.
“Brad, may I see you in my office?” my dad asks, and I tilt my head. “It will only take a minute.”
I glance down at Taylor. If I thought she had fear in her eyes in the car, she’s straight up terrified now.
“We’ll be fine, Brad. I don’t bite,” my mom says and moves over to the table, patting the spot across from her for Taylor.
“Will you be okay?”
Taylor visibly swallows, but seeing my mom looking at us, she nods. I guarantee she’s lying.
My dad waits for me in the hallway, tapping his fingers on the crown molding. “I’ll make it quick,” I say, placing my hand on Emerson’s back.
I steadily walk to my dad, who turns on his heels once I reach him, and I follow him into his office. The dark mahogany furniture is intimidating. Maybe it’s because all of my punishments have started in this office. Just the mere presence of that chair across from his with only a strip of wood between us, makes my heart beat faster.
I shut the door and sit down, not leaning back because this needs to go quick.
“I talked to Rick.” He links his hands together. Rick is our lawyer, the same one who swindled the justice system to free me from the idiotic things I’ve done since I was a teenager.
“I don’t want to hear it, Dad. I’m handling it.” I place my hand in the air, hoping it will speed up this conversation.
“Just listen. He suggests you file for joint custody. You have no rights, and he guarantees your name isn’t on her birth certificate.” He leans back in his chair, and I notice his face is starting to bear wrinkles. I’m probably responsible for most of them. The small amount of grey hair sprinkled at his temples shows he’s growing older.
“I trust her.”
“She withheld the fact that you had a daughter for almost two years. You can’t trust her.” His lips tense into a straight line. “Your mother, she’s beside herself for missing so much time with her granddaughter.”
“Is this about Mom or me?” Irritation making my voice sharp. Is he worried more about my wellbeing or hers?
“Both. You have to hold rights to her, Brad. Otherwise, nothing is stopping her from taking your daughter again. You have to see my point this time.”
I do, but I won’t tell him that. I’m scared shitless about something happening and Emerson disappearing from my life, but everything in my gut tells me to believe in us.
“Since the minute I showed back up in Taylor’s life, she’s done nothing but accommodate me.”
“Your daughter won’t even go to you. You’re fooling yourself.” His nostrils start to flare, which is a telltale sign he’s about to lose his temper.
“She just woke up. Give it more than five minutes.” I stand, not willing to sit here and listen to his bullshit.
His fist pounds on the desk, startling me. “I can’t give you more time. You just never think with your head, Brad.”
“You’re kidding me, right? It’s my life. In case you haven’t noticed, I’m all grown up.”
“I’ll believe it when I have to stop bailing you out.”
“You don’t have to bail me out. I’m perfectly fine.”
“How do you suppose you’ll support her or them?”
“I’m looking for a job, okay?”
I tread toward the door and my dad stands, his height similar to mine.
“Brad, Rick’s coming tomorrow,” he says, and my heart clenches as I hold the doorknob in my hand.
“Tell him not to. I’m not going to fight her for Emerson.” I open the door a sliver to free myself.
“You’re being ridiculous. Think about what I said.”
I slam the door shut again and pin him with my matching eyes.
“No. It’s done, Dad. Tell Rick not to waste his time.”
My dad stares at me long and hard, contemplating his next step. He’s never one to back down.
“Fine, but believe me, you’ll regret it.”
I don’t respond and open the door, leaving the confines of his office. I’m not fifteen anymore, and this isn’t about me TP-ing Johnny Carmichael’s house. I’m a grown man with a family to support. He’ll figure that out soon enough.
Making a beeline right to the kitchen, I can hear Emerson giggling. When I turn the corner, my mom is tickling her feet in the highchair while she gobbles down some of the lunchmeat my mom had out.
“Dada!” Em exclaims, and my mom’s mouth hangs open, peering over to me.
“Hey, baby girl,” I say, kissing the top of her head before taking the seat next to Taylor.
“She knows?” my mom asks, and Taylor rolls her eyes.
“Hell, yes. I taught her who I was.” I grab a roll and start preparing a sandwich, happy to see Taylor already has a plate full of food.
“You’ll have to use better language now.” My mom raises her eyebrows at me and I nod, agreeing.
My dad follows me in a few minutes later. Hopefully, af
ter he’s called off the wolves, namely Rick and his guys, from Taylor. He sits and begins to prepare his own sandwich with little acknowledgement of anyone in the room.
Emerson eats her plate and then wiggles and whines in her highchair. Taylor moves to stand and so does my mom.
“Do you mind?” my mom asks Taylor, and Taylor sits back down with a smile.
“No.”
You’d think my mom just won the lottery with the smile plastered to her face. She holds her arms out and Emerson accepts the invitation. At this point, I think she’ll go to anyone who will free her from the contraption. If I’ve learned anything about my daughter these past weeks, it’s that she doesn’t like restrictions. She probably inherited that from me.
My mom glows as she carries Emerson out of the kitchen. “I’ll just take her to the family room.” My mom informs Taylor, who looks behind her, seeing the toys by the couch.
“Don’t worry. She’s already had some poor schmuck here to child safety the place early this morning,” my dad mumbles over a mouthful of his turkey sandwich.
“Oh, you didn’t need to go to that much trouble,” Taylor says, and I smile over at her. She’s so sweet.
“Well, we don’t want any harm done to her.” The kitchen chair slides along the floor and my dad walks over to the fridge.
“He’s moody,” I whisper, and she shoots me a nervous smile. Like one does to the dentist right before they’re about to shoot you up with Novocain.
“How’s Golden child?” I change the subject to Piper, because since she married the star Olympian, she’s the number one child.
“Tanner and Piper are coming home for Thanksgiving. The McCains are hosting. Won’t you join us, Taylor?” My dad opens up his Orangina on the way back to the table, and I’m wondering what spurred on his niceness in the last minute.
“Oh, I wish I could, but I usually have the meal for my family, and I wouldn’t want to disappoint anyone.”
“Then I’ll probably be over there,” I tell my dad, and I watch his chest rise and fall from a big breath.
“We can talk about it later,” he says, taking a healthy bite of his sandwich.
Love Rekindled (Love Surfaced) Page 11