‘But …?’ She looked to Lucinda, torn between leaving her sister alone in her tender emotional state and going with Mitch, who was acting very bizarrely indeed.
As if reading her mind, Lucinda said, ‘I’m fine. Go. I’ll find Mrs Sampson and see if she needs any help.’
Lucinda let out a sigh of relief as she watched Charlie climb into Mitch’s ute. She hoped nothing too serious was wrong but at the same time she welcomed the few moments to herself. She closed the door of the almost-renovated motel room, grabbed a glass from the bathroom, filled it with water and then guzzled it down, almost as fast as she’d guzzled last night’s wine.
She groaned at the pain in her head—caused by a combination of said wine, lack of sleep, this whole awful situation and self-loathing. As unlikely as it seemed, the possibility of her being pregnant had never crossed her mind while she’d been bemoaning her troubles to Charlie, but now the thought of how all that wine might affect an unborn child made her want to throw up. It would be just typical that the moment she let everything go, the moment her life totally fell to pieces, that’s when she’d strike it lucky.
Maybe it was good that she hadn’t had babies on the brain last night. But then again, maybe Joe was right; maybe she was simply losing the plot.
‘Oh, Joe.’ She sighed and put the glass down with a thunk. What had he been doing yesterday while she’d been travelling or last night while she’d been crying? Playing Minecraft on the iPad? Drinking beer with his mates? Watching mindless television?
Or had he felt like her—utterly lost—wondering how the hell their lives had come to this?
How many times during the night had she picked up her phone, this close to calling home? She’d been desperate to hear his voice, but his final words were on constant replay in her head, like some nightmare she couldn’t wake up from. The fear that all she’d hear was anger and resentment held her back.
Now, she leant against the bathroom wall and touched her pocket, feeling for her mobile. It felt like the only connection she had to Joe right now, and yet …
Her life was like an impossible logic puzzle. She wanted to call him and apologise—to beg him to let her come home—but could she really tell him what he wanted to hear? She did love him and maybe she’d let her desire for a baby overshadow that, but she couldn’t pretend it wasn’t important to her. He wanted her to live their lives as if having a family didn’t matter, but it did matter.
The noise of an incoming text message jolted her out of her thoughts and she ripped the phone from her pocket, thinking it might be Joe. Her heart sank as she read Madeleine’s name on the screen.
What’s this I hear about you leaving Joe?
So Dad, Mrs Sampson or Charlie had filled Madeleine in and likely Abigail as well. It’s not that she didn’t want them to know but the more people who did, the more this separation felt real.
I haven’t left him. We’re merely having a break.
It sounded so high school, like an old episode of Friends, not like her life.
Her phone started to ring. She didn’t need to check the screen again to know it was her sister.
‘Hey,’ she said as she lifted it to her ear.
‘I’m sorry.’ At Madeleine’s heartfelt sympathy and concern, Lucinda’s eyes prickled again. Dammit, she couldn’t even blame pregnancy hormones for her recent tendency towards waterworks.
She swallowed. ‘Thank you.’
‘I’ve never been good at saying the right things, not like you,’ Madeleine said, ‘but I just want you to know I’m always on the end of a phone line if you need to talk. Any time, day or night. The only time I won’t be available is if I’m in the delivery suite, but I’ll always call you back. Oh shit, I shouldn’t have mentioned the delivery suite, should I? Not with you and Joe wanting … Argh … see, I’ve done it again. I’m terrible at this comforting business.’
Lucinda laughed through her tears. Despite Madeleine thinking she’d put her foot in it, by just being herself she helped. Lucinda had never felt much in need of a big sister’s guidance before but now—maybe because Mum wasn’t there to call on anymore—she wished Madeleine wasn’t so far away. ‘No, you’re not,’ she said, when she’d recovered. ‘I needed that laugh.’
‘Well, phew, I was about to order a box of chocolates and a crate of wine to be delivered post haste as an apology.’
‘Maybe you should do that anyway,’ Lucinda said, walking out of the bathroom and sitting down on the bed. ‘How are you going? Any progress on the baby-making?’
‘You don’t want to talk about that.’
‘Yes, I do.’ Granted, she’d probably feel like she’d been kicked in the gut by a Clydesdale if Madeleine ended up pregnant now, but her older sister was trying hard to play the supportive role and so could she.
Madeleine sighed. ‘We’re in the waiting zone. Period due in a week. I swing between being hopeful and pessimistic.’
‘I know what that’s like. And is the donor okay about continuing until you succeed?’
‘Hugo? Yeah, he’s been great. So encouraging and supportive. He was a good friend before this, but …’ Madeleine’s voice drifted off.
‘But?’
‘Oh, it’s just that things are a little weird with his girlfriend. She’s a good friend too and has been really supportive—believe it or not this was her idea—but I feel as if the dynamics of our friendship have changed since we started this. I’m not quite sure how to act around her and …’
‘And?’ Lucinda had to prompt her again.
‘Never mind.’ Madeleine abruptly changed the subject. ‘So, what are you going to do today?’
Lucinda guessed Madeleine wasn’t telling her everything but she didn’t have the energy to pry further. ‘Well, Charlie’s going great guns on her redecoration efforts, so I guess maybe I’ll take over some of her load in the motel so she can focus on that.’
‘I thought she might go back to Melbourne now that you’re there.’
‘Yes, I thought so too, but I suppose we don’t have any idea how long I’ll stay and she’s really thrown herself into this project. She doesn’t want to abandon it midstream.’
‘Good for Charlie,’ Madeleine said. ‘Maybe she’s finally found her calling.’
‘Yes, maybe.’
‘Look, I’d better go, but I meant it about calling me, any time.’
‘Thanks. And good luck. I hope you’ve got good news to share soon.’ Lucinda disconnected, thinking that just as Charlie had found direction, she herself had lost her way.
Chapter Thirty-six
Charlie barely had the chance to click her seatbelt into place before Mitch shot out of the car park, the wheels screeching as he turned onto the road. She glanced backwards through the rear-view window to check if he’d left skid marks on the tarmac and then turned to look at him.
‘Have you got a death wish? What’s this all about?’
‘How’s Lucinda?’ he asked, ignoring her questions.
‘She’s fine. Understandably upset about the state of her marriage, but she’ll be okay. I’m sure she and Joe will get through this.’
‘That’s good.’ Yet his gruff tone didn’t match his words. ‘So, you don’t think she’ll stay long?’
‘I don’t know about that. They’ve got a bit to sort through, but …’ She paused and let out a sigh. ‘This isn’t about Lucinda and Joe, is it?’
‘Nope.’
‘Then what?’
‘You’ll see.’
What the heck was going on? Short, brusque answers were very un-Mitch-like and his hands were jittering on the steering wheel as if he’d overdosed on caffeine. He seemed nervous but she couldn’t for the life of her think why. She tried to recall a time she’d known Mitch to be apprehensive about anything and came up blank.
‘Are we going to visit Kate and Macca?’ she asked as they turned to the road that led to his brother’s farm.
‘Please.’ This one pleading word was hissed through his te
eth. ‘Stop asking so many questions. Just be patient or you’ll ruin everything.’
‘So this isn’t something bad? No one has died or been in an accident?’
‘No. I promise. Nothing bad like that. At least, I hope you don’t think it’s bad.’ He kind of groaned this last bit and Charlie noticed he’d turned a pale but definite shade of green.
Worried about Mitch’s agitated state and not wanting it to get worse while driving, she zipped her lips and held on tightly to the seat as they zoomed along the gravel. About a kilometre before the turn-off to Kate and Macca’s place, he turned into another driveway.
‘Who lives here?’ she asked.
‘No one,’ he said. ‘It’s part of Kate and Macca’s land and they promised I could build a house out here one day if I got sick of living in town.’
‘Okay,’ was all Charlie could think of to say. He’d never mentioned anything about building a home. This trip was getting weirder and weirder by the second.
Mitch slowed a little as he drove further off the road. They climbed a slight hill and in the distance she saw a massive old Eucalypt tree with something bright beneath it. She squinted, trying to make out what it was but before she could, Mitch stopped the ute and climbed out.
‘Where are you going?’ she called as he started walking around the front. She unclicked her seatbelt and had her hand on the door to open it but he got there first.
‘I don’t want you to go back to Melbourne,’ he blurted and then he took hold of her hands and pulled her out of the ute.
‘What?’ She frowned in confusion as a soft breeze blew against them.
‘I know Lucinda’s home so you’re free to go back to the city and start your life again, but I don’t want that.’ His voice cracked a little and Charlie noted his eyes were glistening. ‘You’re my best friend in the world, Charles, and I want you to stay here and start a life with me.’
‘What?’ she said again, struggling to get her head around his words.
In reply, he grabbed hold of her shoulders, drew her towards him and kissed her hard on the lips. It was a no-holds-barred lip lock. The kind that made every inch of her body shiver deliciously. He slid his hands up her neck and into her hair, drawing her even closer and deepening the kiss with raw possessive tenderness.
So this was how Mitch kissed.
She’d gone to sleep imagining this every night for the last few months, but her fantasies had nothing on the reality. For the first few seconds she was frozen, but then heat shot through her, awakening every cell and bone in her body as if lit by an inner flame. Nothing she’d ever experienced before could match it. Not one tiny bit of her wanted to miss out and she snuck her hands around his waist about to grab hold of his buttocks and draw them even closer together.
And then Mitch abruptly pulled back.
Charlie let out a little moan as he disconnected himself from her embrace. The skin on her face tingled from the scrape of his stubble.
‘I’m sorry, I didn’t plan to do that,’ he muttered, ‘but I had to. I had to know what it felt like to kiss you, even if now you want to slap me in the face.’
‘Why would I want to do that? That was the best damn kiss I’ve ever had in my life, Mitchell McDonald.’ Despite her candid admission, she blushed, because … well, this was Mitch—Mitch!—and they’d never done anything like that before.
‘Really?’ He looked a little sheepish. ‘In that case … do you want to do it again?’
‘Hell yes.’ This time she wasn’t sure who grabbed who, which tongue led the way or whose hands went where first. It didn’t matter. They were so tightly pressed together she could barely tell where she ended and Mitch began and that was exactly the way she wanted it. Soon she felt something hard pressing against her stomach and the knowledge of its existence caused the simmering desire within her to reach boiling point.
She tugged on the bottom of Mitch’s shirt, hitching it up and over his head. They fumbled at each other’s clothing. There wasn’t any finesse, no cute striptease on either side, but it was quick and that was all that mattered. Before long their boots were kicked off in the dirt and their clothes scattered at their feet, both of them starkers in the paddock. The cool air didn’t bother them because their bodies were radiating enough heat to send a hot air balloon into space.
Mitch slipped his hands between her legs and the feel of his calloused fingers touching her most intimate part almost made her combust. She fell back against the passenger seat, half in the ute, half out as he drove her to the brink.
‘Oh. Yes. Mitch. Wow.’ She sounded like a floozy. She didn’t care. There was no one to hear them but a few sheep and maybe some cows and if the animals needed therapy after bearing witness to this, well, so be it. She’d been waiting for this moment for so long.
Just when she thought she might actually die from orgasm, she somehow found strength. Wanting Mitch inside her more than she’d ever wanted anything before, she clambered out of the ute and literally jumped his bones. Half-chuckling, he caught her as she wrapped her legs around his waist. He swivelled to lean against the ute and they both cried out as he thrust into her, taking on both their weights. He was so strong, so incredible, so … hers. And the thought made her heart want to burst with joy.
Afterwards, he slowly lowered her feet to the ground and then cupped her face with his hands, gazing into her eyes. ‘Well, that’s not exactly how I planned our first time.’
‘Oh?’ she said, still coming down from the effects of total ravishment. ‘You were planning this?’
‘I was hoping.’ He slowly turned her round so she was looking towards the gum tree she’d noticed on arrival. ‘I had a surprise set up down there, a confession to make, but I simply couldn’t wait a moment longer.’
He stooped to pick up their clothes, handing hers to her one by one. They dressed and then he took her hand and they walked towards the tree. As they approached, she saw he’d laid out a large picnic rug scattered with what looked like pink and red rose petals.
‘I feel a lot more confident about admitting how I feel now we’ve got the sex thing out of the way,’ Mitch admitted as they came to the edge of the rug. A big esky sat off to the side and he let go of her hand to open it. Like a magician conjuring rabbits from a hat, he pulled out a bottle of bubbly, two glasses and a whole host of other treats. Charlie thought of her words to Lucinda last night about wishing someone would do something romantic for her. And she smiled.
‘Sit,’ he said.
She dropped to her knees and on closer inspection saw that the nibbles he’d chosen were all her favourite things. Among them were olives and a hummus dip that looked suspiciously homemade. ‘Did you make this?’ she asked, grabbing a carrot stick and dipping it in.
He nodded as she slipped it into her mouth. ‘I wanted to do something special.’ He sat beside her, opened the champagne, poured two glasses and then handed her one.
She took a sip, savouring the bubbles on her tongue, already light-headed from what they’d just done. ‘I wasn’t going to go back to Melbourne,’ she confessed, ‘but if it took you thinking that I would for this to happen between us, then I’m glad you did.’
He shook his head and took her hand in his. ‘I love what we have going on—our playful banter, our movie nights, hell, I even love painting walls when it’s with you—but I’m greedy. I want so much more.’
‘So do I.’ Charlie couldn’t help but smile. ‘But we’ve been together almost every day since I came home. Why didn’t you say something?’
He sighed. ‘Why didn’t you?’
It was a good question.
‘I’ve been trying to psych myself up for weeks,’ he admitted, ‘but I’ve been shit-scared you’d laugh in my face and tell me to quit mucking around. We’ve been friends for so long and I’ve always wanted more, but you’ve never given me any reason to hope.’
‘I’ve never given you any reason to hope?’ she exclaimed, unable to believe her ears.
He sh
ook his head. ‘You have your glamorous life in Melbourne and I’m nothing but a country truckie content to live in the sticks.’
‘Oh, you’re a lot more than that, Mitchell. And why do you think I went to Melbourne in the first place?’
He cocked his head to one side and frowned.
‘I was tired of playing the third wheel to Mitch-and-Lara.’
‘We’ve been broken up a long time. I think it was when I was with her that I realised no one would ever measure up to you.’
She shook her head in disbelief. ‘What about all the women you dated between Lara and now? According to local gossip, you’ve been quite the playboy. Were you just wanting to be sure?’
He laughed at her outrage.
‘You’ve been giving me mixed signals for months,’ she continued. ‘Hanging around constantly, yet when I joked about kissing you, you reacted like I’d given you herpes or something.’
‘Now, now, Charles,’ he said, sounding like his old cocky and loveable self again. ‘Let’s not argue about this. I think it’s fair to say we were both stupid and slow, so how about we start making up for that right now.’
He reached out and stole the glass from her fingers, placing both their glasses on top of the esky.
‘What exactly did you have in mind?’ she asked, feeling more wanton than she ever had in her life.
‘This,’ he said, gently pushing her backwards until she lay flat on the rug. And then he covered her mouth and kissed her.
Chapter Thirty-seven
Madeleine was late. Since she’d started having periods at age twelve, her menstrual cycles had been like clockwork. She remembered joking with her schoolfriends in her teens that if she ever got pregnant, she’d know about it because of her never-deviating twenty-eight day cycles. Well, yesterday had been day twenty-seven and this morning … nothing.
She’d leapt out of bed and rushed to the bathroom to make sure and then squealed in a manner most unlike her. The people in the surrounding apartments would be wondering what was going on. She didn’t care. The last week had felt like a decade. Despite knowing that physical pregnancy symptoms were rarely reliable before the first missed period, she’d been second-guessing every little twinge or flutter in her body. The smells in the hospital cafeteria, which usually made her hungry, had made her nauseous instead. And she was tired, so damn tired. Hugo had been her rock, checking in with her every day. She even found herself sharing intimate things with him—like how her breasts were a little more tender than usual—things she’d have discussed if he was her husband and they were trying for a baby in the usual way.
The Patterson Girls Page 33