by J. S. Scott
This is what she’d wanted, what she’d needed from Jason since her high school graduation, the day she’d finally admitted to herself that she was hot for him. He’d never made a move on her, never treated her as anything other than a friend, but she’d wanted…this. She’d felt the sexual tension between them since the day she’d seen him at her high school graduation party. Not sure if the longing was just coming from her or both of them, she’d avoided any kind of close contact or intimate conversation with him ever since she realized she wanted him. Now, she knew the attraction was mutual. The proof was hard and firm against her lower abdomen. She wasn’t sure whether she wanted to celebrate or run for the hills. The sensations she experienced from his carnal embrace were new to her, as exhilarating as they were frightening.
In the end, Hope’s traitorous body made the decision all by itself. Her female hormones did a victory cheer as she let her fingers slide into the coarse texture of his hair and yanked his mouth harder against her own.
Closer. I need to be closer to him. I need this. I need him.
She let her tongue duel with his, gave herself up to the moment. Jason was taboo, her secret fantasy come to life, and she let herself wallow in the passion of the desperate touch of his lips as he conquered her mouth. He brought her body to life for the first time in a very long time, and with far more intensity than she’d ever experienced. With Jason, there was no slow burn from his passionate kiss; she felt incinerated, overpowered by his masculinity, the heat between them completely consuming.
Finally, he pulled his mouth from hers. Both of them panted from the out-of-control encounter.
“That’s why I needed privacy,” he told her hungrily. His face was buried in her hair and she quivered from the heat of his breath on her neck. “Watching you from across the room was killing me.”
Coming back to reality, Hope tried to pull away from him. “Jason, I—”
“Don’t,” he growled. His arms tightened around her. “Don’t tell me that you didn’t want that and a whole lot more as much as I do.”
She couldn’t tell him that, because it would have been a lie. There had been enough lies in her life. She hadn’t expected her body to respond to desire like this, but she had a volatile reaction to Jason. “I did want it. If I didn’t, you’d be screaming in pain right now from me nailing you in the balls with my knee.”
And God help me, I do want more. But I can’t. I can’t do this.
She would never give herself over completely to physical desire, and she knew instinctively that with Jason, it would most likely be all or nothing. He was never tepid in anything he did, and she was fairly certain he’d want everything from her.
A low husky chuckle vibrated against her ear. “I’m happy to know you haven’t changed much,” he said, amused.
Oh yeah, I have—you’d be surprised how different I am. “You don’t know me anymore.” She pulled back slowly, to wean herself off the incredible feel of his body against hers.
He grasped her by the shoulders, and wrapped her more tightly in his jacket. “Maybe I don’t,” he conceded. “But I want to catch up. I want you. Spend time with me tonight, Hope. Let’s go on an adventure together like we did when we were kids.”
That comment hit like a bolt of lightning to her heart. Her little adventures with Jason had been the highlights of her childhood. Granted, most of their so-called adventures ended up in the local candy store because Jason was addicted to chocolate, or the ice cream shop because she’d begged him to take her, but Jason had always made those simple excursions seem like crazy expeditions. Looking back, he’d been a very good sport about playing a sea captain or an explorer when he was already in high school, just for her amusement. “I’m not ten years old anymore,” she muttered unhappily.
“Believe me, I’m well aware of that fact,” Jason replied darkly, enigmatically.
Hope put her hands on his muscular biceps. She looked up at him and searched his expression, able to decipher very little in the dim lights of the patio, except for the hint of desire that lingered in his eyes. “Why? You have women falling at your feet on a daily basis. Why me? Why now? You could pick the most gorgeous woman in the room back there if you want to kill some time.” Jason Sutherland was a billionaire investor, and at the age of thirty-one, he was one of the most sought-after bachelors in the world. Even if she was an old family friend, why did he want to spend any time with her? Although Hope owned a home here in Amesport, Maine, she didn’t live here, and Jason had flown in just to attend Grady’s engagement and New Year’s party. Both of them would leave in the morning. Maybe he was just restless and bored. Still, there were plenty of attractive women inside for him to pick from if he just wanted a one-nighter. She couldn’t give him what he wanted, and she wanted more from him than she was capable of accepting. Jason made her crave him like a highly addictive drug, but she knew she was unable to absorb him like she wanted to do.
Jason shrugged. “I did pick the most attractive woman at the party, and I don’t need to kill time. I just don’t feel like pretending tonight, Hope.”
The profound sense of loneliness in his voice echoed in her soul. Hope wasn’t even going to act as if she didn’t know what he meant. She knew. Jason was surrounded by people, lived in the world of the mega rich, but Hope knew from experience that it was difficult to know what people’s motives were when they claimed to be a friend, or when they claimed to care. Most of the world they’d both grown up in was superficial at best, which was why she avoided the media and chose to live outside of that sphere as an adult. However, Jason didn’t have a choice. He was a little young to retire, and it wasn’t part of his personality anyway. He was driven, and always had been.
Hope lifted her hand to his face and stroked over his rugged jawline. She loved the feel of the stubble beneath her fingers. “You have more to offer than money,” she told him softly, honestly. Beneath his brutal, businesslike exterior, Jason had the heart of a man who had done just about anything to cheer up a grade school geek who had been bullied during her childhood years. He’d even been willing to make a fool of himself when he was supposed to be a cool high school kid. That heart still beat in this man’s chest. He’d just learned to cover it well with social ennui and the “kill or be killed” survival instinct in business, just like her brothers had.
“And what else do I have to offer?” Jason asked gruffly. He wrapped one strong, muscular arm around her waist again while he traced her lips absently with his index finger.
You mean something other than the fact that you have a good heart and the body and face of a god? Um…you mean other than the fact that you’re hot enough to melt almost any woman’s panties right off her body? Oh yeah, and did I forget to mention that you’re also freaking brilliant?
Jason wasn’t just attractive; he was every woman’s secret fantasy. She’d never seen him naked, but she had no doubt he was breathtaking. It wasn’t difficult to see that he was ripped, even with his clothes on, and his broad shoulders and over six foot height made him appear dangerous and formidable. His golden hair was several different shades of sexy blond, and it was cut in a style that made him look constantly mussed up. It was amazing that he could make that style so damn sexy and sophisticated, even in a tux. Okay…especially in a tux. On Jason, the cut was polished and urbane, even if it was a “messy hair” look that made every woman— especially her—want to rip off his clothes and take him to bed just to make him look even more disheveled because he could rock that particular look so damn well.
“You have a good heart, Jason,” she finally answered, distracted by the sensual feel of his finger on her lips and the look of hunger in his eyes. She thought it was best to leave out the hotness factor for now.
He threw his head back and roared with laughter.
“What? You do,” Hope answered firmly, getting annoyed.
He sobered slightly and shot her a wicked smile. “I’m an asshole, Hope.”
She couldn’t dispute that. An
yone who was as rich as Jason had a part of them that was ruthless. “Just on the surface,” she mused quietly. Her hand fell from his face and to his shoulder.
He fiddled with a lock of her hair, his expression pensive. “You’d be surprised how deeply the asshole part of me goes.” He let out a masculine sigh. “My sweet Hope, rescuer of all creatures in need, do you want to try to rehabilitate me?” he asked woefully.
Jason didn’t need to change. He just needed someone who understood him. She cringed at his description of her, but sometimes she was a sucker for any animal or human in need. Almost always, that particular characteristic actually ate at her soul because of the path she’d chosen to take with her life. “I still have Daisy,” she confessed. Jason had brought her the mostly white kitten with a few tan spots when she’d seen him at her high school graduation. Daisy had been pathetic and starving, abandoned on the side of the road. Jason had brought her to Hope, and she’d never had the heart to get rid of Daisy. It had been love at first sight for her and her faithful companion.
“I thought you were going to fatten her up and find her a home,” Jason remarked knowingly.
“I couldn’t.” Not that Hope had tried very hard to get rid of the kitten. In fact, she’d never tried at all. It had only taken her five minutes to fall in love with the adorable baby feline. “She’s deaf. Nobody wanted her,” she added defensively as Jason gave her a skeptical look. Her blue-eyed cat couldn’t hear, but it didn’t slow Daisy down. The kitten had probably been deaf since birth, and didn’t seem to miss something she’d never even had. However, Hope could never let her out of the house because of the danger of the cat being outside without being able to hear any imminent danger, a fact that didn’t seem to faze Daisy at all.
“I’m sorry,” Jason said remorsefully. “I never meant to saddle you with a deaf cat.”
“Don’t,” Hope said hastily. “I love her. She’s good company.” It wasn’t easy for Hope to have an animal with her travel schedule, but she managed with the help of her next-door neighbor when she couldn’t take Daisy with her.
“Better company than your ex-boyfriend?” Jason asked in a disgruntled tone.
Oh yeah…him.
“Definitely,” she countered adamantly. Jason ran his finger sensually down her cheek and she shivered.
“You’re cold.” Jason took her frigid hand and led her to the door back to the party. “Let’s get out of here. Come away with me,” he said persuasively as they reached the door.
Come away with me.
I just don’t feel like pretending tonight.
Hope looked up at Jason, searched his eyes, tried to figure out his urgency. His expression was cocksure, his jaw still hard-set, but there was a look of persuasion in his eyes that she couldn’t ignore.
I can’t. No, no, no. Not with Jason. I can’t let that slightly pleading light in his eyes get to me.
In the end, it was her own heart that betrayed her. “Okay. I’ll meet you out front. But I’m not sleeping with you, so if you just want to get laid, don’t show up.” Something troubled Jason, and she wanted to know exactly what was going on with him. Besides, she wanted to be with him. They were both leaving tomorrow, and it would probably be a long time before they ran into each other again. Even though being alone with him was dangerous, it was also such a compelling temptation that she couldn’t resist. Beyond the lust, she’d missed him.
I only have tonight.
“That’s not all I want,” Jason answered ominously as he opened the door for her.
Apprehension ran down her spine like a cold finger as she noted the deep timbre of his voice and the fact that he didn’t deny that he wanted to sleep with her. She handed his jacket back to him. “So you won’t try to seduce me?”
“I most likely will at some point because I won’t be able to stop myself, but you can always say no,” he told her gravely.
That was the crux. I’ll have a hell of a time saying no.
She straightened her shoulders, and gave him a disapproving look. “I have no problem saying no,” she lied as she skirted the room to avoid the crowd.
“Hope?” Jason caught her arm gently from behind.
“Yes?”
“It will still be a good night, even if you do say no. I just want us to spend some time together.” His voice vibrated with intensity.
Damn. Damn. Damn. I’m sunk.
He’d sealed her fate with those words. Just that statement tore through her defenses like no other words could. Jason actually wanted her company, too, and it touched her. She could sense his loneliness, and she wanted to assuage it by letting him know she just wanted to be with him.
Without another word, Hope turned on her heel and went to say goodbye to her four brothers and Emily before she grabbed her jacket and exited the Youth Center where the party was being held.
By the time she arrived outside, Jason already waited for her. As she took his outstretched hand and felt the zing of electricity spark between them, she hoped to God she wasn’t going to regret this night.
I’m never going to live through this night.
Jason Sutherland had to swallow a groan as he watched Hope sit in front of the fireplace in her house and moan as she took her first bite of the s’more he’d created for her. He watched her eat the graham cracker, melted chocolate, and toasted marshmallow concoction: her eyes closed, and her tongue darted out to catch the drops of chocolate and marshmallow that stuck to her lips. Never had chocolate seemed so erotic.
Fuck. I want her.
Jason’s possessive instincts nailed him in the gut, and he could barely contain the gnawing desire to have her closer, lick those delectable lips himself. He’d be at the task long after the damn chocolate and marshmallow were gone.
I shouldn’t have come to Maine tonight. I knew she’d probably be here.
Yep. He had known, and if he were honest, he’d admit that her being here was part of the allure that had brought him to Maine. Sure, he wanted to see the Sinclair brothers, especially Grady because he wanted to meet the woman who had captured his reclusive friend’s heart. But he’d be lying to himself if he didn’t admit that knowing Hope was going to be here was both a deterrent…and a temptation. The appeal of seeing her again had won, the victory against his willpower coming pretty damn easily.
Disgusted with himself, Jason had tried to forget the tortured lust that had hit him when he’d seen the eighteen-year-old Hope. Christ. She’d just graduated from high school, and although he had only been twenty-three then, it had still seemed…wrong. Hope was Grady’s baby sister, and Jason was friends with the entire Sinclair clan. Hope had been a sad, shy little girl, an adorable redheaded, freckled child with a big heart who Jason had always wanted to coax into smiling. He’d adored her like the sister he’d never had, and had protected her like any big brother would. Even so, everything had changed when he’d stopped by her high school graduation party. The sight of her threw him off balance and confused their whole relationship. He’d wanted to claim her then; now, eight years later, the desire was a damn obsession. Unfortunately, his dick hadn’t forgotten Hope either. He hadn’t felt that kind of all-consuming carnal lust since he’d seen her at eighteen, but his cock had immediately come to attention once again with the same fervent adoration the minute he’d spotted her across the room tonight.
Over the years, he’d cringed every time he heard from Grady that Hope was seeing someone. Jealousy nearly ate him alive every time he saw her, knowing another man was touching her. But he’d coped with it by working and fucking other women; he hoped that eventually that niggling fear that she’d end up permanently taken by another man would pass.
It hadn’t. His craze to possess her had just gotten stronger, deeper.
And now he was in Hell.
If this mania had been for any other woman except Hope, he would have seduced the female a long time ago, tried to fuck her out of his system. Problem was, it was Hope, and he’d known her almost as long as he could r
emember. So he was utterly and irrevocably screwed at the moment. Not only did he want to fuck her worse than he wanted to breathe, but he actually liked her. Hope was one of the sweetest females he’d ever known, and her big heart was genuine.
She wants me, too.
Her body had responded to him, and that made him even crazier. That the sexual chemistry burned hot both ways made it almost impossible for him not to touch her.
“Thanks for taking me to the fireworks.”
Hope’s voice interrupted Jason’s lustful thoughts. After they’d left Grady’s party, they’d driven down to the beach and had watched the fireworks from his rental car. They held hands like teenagers because he couldn’t seem to completely let go of her now that she was here…and unencumbered. Admittedly, Jason had watched Hope more than he’d watched the sky lighting up with brilliant color, but her face had been so expressive that he couldn’t help himself. “I’m glad you enjoyed it,” he finally replied huskily.
“Didn’t you?” Hope asked curiously. She finished the last of her s’more and licked her fingers. “Aren’t you going to make one for yourself? I know you want the chocolate. That was delicious.”
Fuck! Not the finger licking. Is she trying to kill me?
As he watched that pink tongue stroke over her fingers, he wished that she’d put it to work somewhere on his body, preferably south of his navel.
Jason willed his dirty mind to shut the fuck up. It had been a good night and he didn’t want to spoil it. What he’d told her earlier was true. With Hope, he didn’t have to pretend to be someone he wasn’t. They’d come back here to Hope’s house on the Amesport peninsula after the fireworks, after they’d stopped by the all-night market to get the things they needed to make s’mores. They had both changed into jeans and sweatshirts before settling themselves by the fire. “I will,” he agreed. “I was just busy watching you. You look like you enjoyed it.” Jason had enjoyed it, too, but he now sat on an unrelenting hard-on.