by Kat Mizera
The mattress tilted a little as he leaned over, slowly pulling her arm away and forcing her to look at him. “You can do so much better than me, but one thing you need to get straight is there’s nothing casual about what’s going on between us. I don’t look at other women, I don’t think about other women—hell, I can’t even remember the last time I thought about my wife, Dani. You’ve become part of my life. And Niko’s.”
She stared at him, something inside her tightening almost painfully. “But?”
“All we have is now. You’re leaving and I have to stay. You’ve got this exciting new career and the Olympics… Niko and I would just hold you back.” His eyes sought hers as he leaned closer. “Don’t you see? I have so much baggage…”
“I guess I don’t.”
“I know.” He scooted up to stretch out beside her and they lay on their backs, side by side, without talking.
“Tanya kept pulling me back to the life I’d tried so hard to leave,” he said after a slight hesitation. “I wanted to be American. I came to the U.S. and went to college in Boston, both because of hockey, but also so that I had options in case of an injury—where I could get a real job and stay in the States.”
“What’s your degree in?” she asked curiously.
“International finance.”
“Definitely something you could get work in.”
“I married an American woman, my college sweetheart, but damn, when my best friend in college was killed, everything fell apart. I couldn’t focus, I couldn’t get past it, and for a short time it felt like going back to Russia would be the best way to stop obsessing about it. Instead, my wife divorced me and I fell in love with my brother’s girlfriend. The thing is, she had so much drama it was impossible to think about myself, my career, anything but her. I loved her, but she sucked me into a life I’d worked so hard to avoid because of my father.”
“And now?”
“Now I waffle between excitement that I’m back in the States—for good, I hope—and guilt that she had to die for it to happen.”
Dani was quiet for a bit before she spoke. “Obviously I didn’t know her and wasn’t there to see the way she died, but it sounds like she loved you and Niko enough to sacrifice herself for you two to have exactly this—the life you always wanted, a childhood without fear for her child, and the freedom for you to never look back at the mob and all those horrible people. Her sacrifice was for you, and even if you take what you and I have out of the equation, wouldn’t she have loved you enough to want you to be happy again? I know that’s not with me, but—”
“Wait.” He frowned at her. “Don’t say it like that. There’s nothing wrong with you or what we have. It’s just that we’re at different places in life, sweetheart. I’m a lot older than you, and my kid has to be my priority. You have your whole life in front of you and shouldn’t be tied down to a family that’s not even yours. It would be different if I was able to love again, to truly give myself to someone and start over with marriage, more children… I just don’t think I can. I’m broken, Dani.”
“I wish you wouldn’t say things like that.” She turned onto her side, resting on one elbow so she could look into his handsome face. “There’s nothing broken about you. You’re sweet, tender, gentle. Both with me and with Niko. What else is there?”
“I don’t know.” His face was a mask of pain and uncertainty.
“You could say I’m broken, too, you know? I never felt like a woman until you. You did that. You made me feel sexy. I know I’m pretty and there’s nothing wrong with my body, that it’s just not for everyone. But when I’m with other guys, something happens and I scare them away. Maybe it’s because they’re immature, but maybe it’s because they weren’t you. And maybe I don’t see you as broken because when you’re with me, you’re not.”
“Jesus, Dani.” He lifted his head to kiss her, his lips claiming hers so sweetly it was like she’d never been kissed before. He rested one big hand on her hip, his touch gentle but also possessive; he claimed her every time he touched her.
When he finally pulled away his eyes were hooded with desire but there was something else there too: Need.
“Let’s go to my room,” he whispered, his eyes never leaving hers. “This bed is too small for us.”
“Sergei…”
He brushed a lock of hair off her forehead. “We have six weeks. How do you want to spend them? Together like we’ve been the last few weeks, or as just friends?”
She nearly laughed. Like going back to being just friends was even an option at this point. The smart thing to do would be to go back to Vegas until she had to leave for Colorado, but that wasn’t happening. She needed him as much as he obviously needed her. “You think we’re capable of going back to being nothing but friends?” she whispered against his mouth.
“If you ask it of me, absolutely.”
“I can’t, Sergei. I’m—” She broke off, unwilling to use words like “invested” or “attached.” She was, but it didn’t need to be said. He knew.
“I know, baby. I don’t know what’s going to happen or what we’re going to do come September, but you’re right—when I’m with you I don’t feel broken anymore.”
“Let’s go to bed.” She slid off the bed and held out her hand.
* * *
They took Niko skating the next day. They were going every few days because he enjoyed it so much, and though Sergei and Dani had begun to get tired of the monotony of skating in a circle surrounded by little kids, Niko was improving in leaps and bounds. Luckily, no one seemed to recognize Sergei or realize he played on the local NHL team, so they were often some of the only adults out there. There was a morning session that ran from ten until noon, so it was perfect. They would skate for two hours, have lunch and then Niko would nap for a few hours. It gave them time to get their own things done, but this afternoon they had Marj coming over. Sergei was planning to take Dani to a movie and then an early dinner. He’d never taken her out on a date with just the two of them, and it was time. No matter what happened in September, he wanted her to enjoy their time together. Hell, if he was being honest, he wanted to enjoy it.
The things she’d said last night had resonated deeply. He’d been through a lot in his life, one crisis after another tempered by his success as an athlete. Losing Tatiana had felt like the end, like all he could hope for was to make enough to take care of himself so he could be a good father. He didn’t need nor deserve any other happiness, especially not in the form of a sweet, sexy blonde whose spunk and bright green eyes had consumed him from the moment they’d met. How the hell had he gotten this lucky? She was remarkable in every way and her innocence had had him under a spell since the first time he’d touched her. With so much beauty both inside and out, he could touch her all day and never stop. Maybe she was right; maybe they were so good together because they were right for each other. He didn’t know how to keep her, how to make her want to stay with him, but he was starting to want to try.
A high-pitched cry made him turn in confusion. Dani was skating full-speed toward the other side of the ice, where Niko was sprawled on his back screaming.
“Niko!” Sergei took off after Dani, watching as she dropped to her knees beside the little boy.
“What happened?” he panted, dropping beside her and freezing. There was blood coming from somewhere, seeping onto the ice in a dark red puddle.
Dani had her hands on his upper arm, applying pressure as she yelled for someone to call 9-1-1.
“Blade of a skate cut through his wrist,” she said over her shoulder. “We need to get him medical attention immediately.”
“I can drive him—”
“No!” She barked out the word. “If I move my hands and the pressure, he could bleed out. I need a pen. Does anyone have a pen?”
A crowd had gathered and people began calling out until someone pulled a pen from their jacket, tossing it on the ground by Dani.
“Pull the hair tie out of my hair,” sh
e said to Sergei.
He pulled the black elastic band that had been holding her ponytail and held it out.
“Slide it up his arm,” she instructed.
Sergei’s hands were shaking as he did it.
“Now grab the pen and hang on to it until I tell you.” Dani kept pressure on Niko’s arm as she moved the hair tie above his elbow and snatched the pen from Sergei. Sliding it between the tie and his arm, she started to twist it, creating a tourniquet of sorts.
“Paramedics are here,” someone yelled.
“They need to hurry,” Dani panted. “I don’t know how long this will hold.”
There was movement as the crowd parted to get out of the way and paramedics dropped to the ice and took over for Dani. She sat back, her face pale and hands shaking, though she turned to the paramedic closest to her.
“Blade of a skate cut deep; I think it might’ve hit an artery.”
“Good job with the tourniquet. You probably saved his life.” The paramedics were working swiftly and Sergei slid his arm around her shoulder.
“Mommy…” Niko’s voice wafted over the hushed whispers around them.
“I’m here, buddy.” Sergei reached over to pat his head.
“I want Mommy…” His voice cracked a little.
“Son…” Sergei’s voice cracked, too.
“Mama D!” Niko twisted away from the paramedic but Dani was instantly there, one hand on his cheek as she slid to her stomach so she could be eye level with him.
“I’m here, sweetie. Right here.”
“I’m scared.”
“Daddy and I are right here,” she spoke in a soft, soothing voice. “You need to lie still so the paramedics can help you, okay? Otherwise you’re going to have a really bad boo-boo.”
“It hurts.”
“I know, but you’re going to be okay. They’re going to give you medicine so it doesn’t hurt so much.”
“We need to move him,” someone called out.
“Can I go with him in the ambulance?” Sergei asked one of the medics.
“Mommy,” Niko cried. “I want Mommy to come in the ’bulance!”
“Sergei…” Dani turned wide, anxious eyes to him.
“Go,” he said brusquely. “I’ll meet you there.”
“You sure?”
“Go.” He pressed a light kiss on the top of his son’s head and headed off ice to take off his skates.
“I need sixty seconds to take off my skates,” Dani called to the paramedics, skating behind Sergei and sinking onto the ground as soon as they were off the ice. As she unlaced one skate, Sergei did the other, not saying a word. She grabbed her sneakers off the bench where she’d left them, paused to squeeze his arm and then ran to catch up to the stretcher in her socks. Sergei watched her go and let out a long, deep sigh. What the hell had just happened?
21
It was hours before they got home. Niko had been given pain medicine and something to help him relax while the doctor stitched his wrist and he cried pitifully. Sergei had been a little hurt that Niko only wanted Dani, but he hadn’t allowed either of them to see it because she’d been uncomfortable about it, constantly looking to him for the assurance it was okay to be the one holding Niko through all of it. Even on the drive home, Niko had cried until she’d agreed to sit in the back with his car seat and hold his hand. But this was about Niko’s comfort, not his insecurities, so Sergei had shut his mouth and done what was best for his son.
Now Niko was sleeping and Dani was showering off the blood she’d been covered in. He wandered up to his room, since she was in his shower, and merely leaned against the wall watching. Her eyes were closed as the water sluiced over her, but when she spotted him she held out her hand. He hesitated for barely a second before yanking off his clothes and joining her under the hot spray. She moved so he could wet his hair and then she reached for his shampoo, putting it in her hand and gently massaging it into his hair and scalp.
His eyes closed of their own volition and it wasn’t until this moment he understood how much the ordeal had shaken him.
“It’s extremely fortuitous your wife has medical training,” the doctor had said. “The blade nicked an artery and several veins—the bleeding could have been much more significant. She probably saved his life.”
Sergei hadn’t corrected him that she wasn’t his wife, nor had he dared to look at Dani. He’d simply shaken the doctor’s hand before picking up his son and holding him tightly.
She probably saved his life.
This amazing, sweet, sexy woman not only had brought Sergei’s blackened soul back to life, she’d saved his son. His priority in life was Niko and without Dani he might have lost him. The very idea made him a little queasy and he had to lean against the wall to catch his breath.
“It’s okay.” Dani’s voice was as warm as her hands as she washed him. “He’s going to be okay.”
“If you hadn’t been there…”
“It was an accident. Little kids get hurt all the time. I’m sure you would’ve thought about a tourniquet to stop the bleeding.”
He met her eyes. “I was frozen. I responded when you told me what to do, but I was staring at the blood and trying to remember my name.”
“If I hadn’t been there, you would have jumped into action. You’re his father. It would’ve been instinct.”
“You’re not his mother but it was still instinct.”
“This is what I studied, what I want to do with my life. It’s a lot more natural for me.” She slid her hands down his stomach, along the crease of his thigh and then to where she lightly cupped his balls. His cock instantly sprang to life, hardening at her featherlight caresses.
“Thank you,” he said in a rough voice, one hand resting lightly on her waist. “There are no words for what you did.”
She kissed her way down his chest, dropping to her knees. “Let’s see what you have to say about what I’m about to do.”
* * *
“Mommy!” The high-pitched wail startled both Sergei and Dani out of a deep sleep.
She swung her legs over the side of the bed without thinking. “He’s probably in pain.”
“You get his meds.” Sergei was up too. “I’ll get him.”
“Maybe we should bring him in here for the rest of the night,” Dani said, pulling on shorts and a T-shirt. “It’s after four, so he probably won’t sleep past seven anyway.”
“That’s a good idea.”
She padded down to the kitchen to grab the prescription they’d had filled and some watered-down juice. Taking care of Niko was second nature now and the intimacy between her and Sergei tonight had been noticeably more intense. His need for her had been over-the-top, greedy in the way he’d taken her over and over. Something had shifted, but she couldn’t help but wonder if it was because of the trauma of seeing Niko get hurt and then receiving stitches. Sergei had done his best to stay strong, but she’d seen him turn his head while the doctor had been sewing up the little boy’s wrist. It had bothered her a little too, but only because she adored Niko and it was almost like watching her own child in distress. She had a strong stomach and didn’t have a problem with blood and the like, but Niko was different.
Going back upstairs, she found Sergei and Niko cuddled on the bed, Sergei whispering softly to him in Russian.
“Hey, buddy. How about you take your medicine so you feel better?” Dani slid onto the bed next to them.
“Yuck.” He wrinkled his nose at the little cup of pink liquid.
“I know, but because you’re not feeling well, you can have juice to wash it down.” She held up the sippy cup.
Niko sighed, but nodded wearily, drinking down the medicine and then practically snatching the cup from Dani’s hand. After he’d drained it, he nestled into Dani’s side and she pulled him close while Sergei reached over to turn out the lights. He’d moved around the bed and was now behind her, one arm draped across her waist, his hand resting on Niko’s side.
* * *<
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The three of them dozed off and when Dani opened her eyes again, Sergei was on his back, texting someone on his phone. Their eyes met and he leaned over to kiss her.
“Good morning,” he whispered.
“Good morning.”
Niko was still asleep so they quietly got out of bed and went to separate bathrooms to freshen up. A few minutes later they met up in the kitchen and began their usual morning routine. If she was going for a run, she made herself a protein shake and he made breakfast for himself and Niko. If she wasn’t running, like today, she made breakfast for all of them while he made coffee.
“Who were you talking to so early in the morning?” she asked as she began mixing up pancake batter; it was Niko’s favorite and she wanted to surprise him.
“Toli. Wanted to catch him up on what happened yesterday.”
“Ah.” She heated up the griddle.
“He says, ‘Thank you.’”
She shook her head, though she was smiling. “You guys are acting like I did something out of the ordinary. Anyone with even a little medical training would have jumped in to help.”
“But they didn’t. You did. And the doctor said things could have gone really, really wrong if you hadn’t.”
“He’s okay and I’m happy I was able to help him. I adore that little guy.”
“I know. He adores you, too.”
“I’m hungry.” Niko wandered into the room looking sleepy and Sergei immediately scooped him up, kissing the side of his face.
“Good morning, big guy. Mama D’s making pancakes for you.”
“Yay!” Niko’s eyes lit up and he grinned.
* * *
The next few days were low-key since Niko didn’t have his usual energy. Though their nights were filled with more passion than ever, they weren’t able to spend much quality time together during the day because Niko was so needy. Dani had gone to the gym by herself twice, since they didn’t want to bring Niko to the on-site daycare center just yet, and Sergei had met up with Aaron again tonight for a few beers. It had been nice to get out and talk to another guy, but knowing she was waiting in bed for him made it much better because he couldn’t wait to get home to her. In just under a month, their sex life had gone from cautious but passionate to constant and sensual as hell. She wanted to do everything, all the time, and he couldn’t get enough, either. Their chemistry was off the charts and every time he thought he might start getting bored, either she suggested something she’d heard about or asked him to try something new.