“It’s true Dr. Dennis thinks she ought to have a thorough physical examination,” Liz continued, “but he thinks her own doctor ought to do it.”
“He’s an old woman,” Josie sniffed.
“Then get yourself a new doctor,” Liz said.
“It’s only indigestion,” Josie said.
“Maybe, but—”
“And I wouldn’t have that if you would leave Ethan alone.”
Liz should have known Josie would get around to her and Ethan sooner or later.
“I’m not going to marry Ethan,” she told Josie. “We had a long talk and decided we wouldn’t suit.”
“Then why did he spend Saturday afternoon playing with your children?”
Liz felt like uttering several curses, even though she was still on church grounds. “Ethan has always played with the children,” Liz said. “He’s very thoughtful.”
“Not nearly as thoughtful as he was before you got your hooks into him,” Josie said.
“Well, I’ve taken them out again. Now make sure you see your doctor about that physical. Bye, Norma.”
Liz turned before Josie could say anything else. She was having enough trouble dealing with knowing Matt was avoiding her, that he had gone to Charlottesville to keep from having to be in the same house with her for two days. She didn’t want to be blamed for Ethan’s refusal to accept that there was no hope of her falling in love with him.
She had tried to keep busy during the weekend. She had worked in the garden, played with the children, started a new dress for Rebecca, visited her aunt, helped her cousin choose wallpaper for her new bathroom.
But none of it had driven thoughts of Matt from her mind any more than it had during the week. Both of them had worked harder than usual, had asked Sadie or Salome to bring things from each other’s office they would normally have gotten themselves. It had been so obvious Salome had asked if they’d had a fight.
But meals had been the worst. They couldn’t avoid each other then. Neither could they ignore each other. The children wouldn’t let them. It was almost as though they had sensed something was wrong and talked louder and longer, hoping it would go away.
Liz had to face it. As long as Matt stayed in her house, they were going to treat him like part of the family. They would want him to play with them, eat with them, watch TV with them, put them to bed. And they wouldn’t understand if that suddenly changed.
Poor things! They didn’t understand conflicting ambitions or opposing viewpoints any more than they could understand the need that was tearing her apart.
She knew all the reasons why she should keep her distance from Matt. She knew all the reasons why any relationship between them would end in pain. She understood perfectly why he wouldn’t let anything happen even if she were fool enough to want it to. Yet despite knowing all of that, her thoughts of him had grown more frequent, her need to talk to him more urgent, the desire to be with him more intense.
Which was a stupid thing for a woman of her intelligence to let happen. With David and Ethan to deal with, she already had enough problematical men in her life.
Chapter Thirteen
Matt looked at the chart in his hand. It said that Josh Worsley was eight years old and had never seen a doctor for anything more serious than a bad case of poison ivy. The boy sat forward in his chair, his hands folded in his lap, his big gray eyes watching Matt with curiosity rather than fear. His long, straight, dark hair had been ruthlessly combed into place, but Matt guessed that during summer it usually covered about half of his face. His clothes weren’t new, but they were clean and neat.
“And what’s wrong with you, young man?” Matt asked. “You look far too healthy to be spending a nice summer afternoon in the doctor’s office.”
“He didn’t want to come, but I made him,” his mother said “He’s been acting peculiar lately.”
“In what way?”
Matt had learned that peculiar in Iron Springs didn’t always mean the same as it did in other places.
“He’s been looking mealy and picking at his dinner for the last few weeks. This morning he woke up with a headache.”
“Has he had a cold, any flulike symptoms? Is anyone else in the house having these symptoms?”
“No. We’re a very healthy family,” Mrs. Worsley said. “Josh has never acted like this before. I don’t know what’s got into him. I even caught him staring off into space when he was watching ESPN yesterday.”
“How is that significant?” Matt asked. Mae Worsley looked country, but she didn’t look stupid.
“He’s crazy about the Washington Redskins. Once the season starts, he near ’bout drives me and his father frantic talking about them, reading about them, quoting numbers till I fair want to scream. They was having a special report on the team before the start of the exhibition season. You know what it’s like. They show you all the new players, talk about even more numbers, and make those poor fellas that hardly got out of grade school embarrass their mamas by talking. When I saw Josh wasn’t paying attention, I knew something was wrong.”
“Has he been doing this long?”
“This morning was the first time I’ve noticed it with the television. But he hasn’t been rambunctious like usual.”
Matt could see no outward signs that there was anything wrong with the boy, but he was getting an uneasy feeling in his gut.
“Has he been having recurrent or persistent fever?”
“No.”
“Bone pain?”
“He hasn’t complained of it.”
“Has he lost any weight?”
“No.”
“How about bruises?”
“Show the doctor your arm, Josh.”
The boy pulled up his sleeve to expose several small bruises on the underside of his arm.
“He got these last week. Shouldn’t they be gone by now?”
Matt grew more certain of the probable diagnosis, but he wouldn’t know until he’d completed a physical exam on the boy. He wouldn’t even know then until he’d ordered a series of tests. He would never tell a mother that her child had leukemia until he was absolutely certain of his diagnosis.
“Well I think it’s best I give him a good going-over. Then maybe I will know what all this means.”
“You think there’s anything wrong with him, Doctor?”
“I can’t say until I’ve examined him.”
“I’m probably being too anxious. Ma says all kids go off color now and again. She says I worry too much, but I can’t help it. He’s our only young ’un.”
“I understand. I’ll be very thorough. If I have any questions, I’ll order special tests.” He ruffled the boy’s hair. “I want to make certain he has a clean bill of health.”
Mrs. Worsley rose. “You do like the doctor says,” she told Josh. “I don’t want to hear that you caused a ruckus.”
“I’m sure he’ll be a little gentleman,” Matt said. He just hoped that all the signs meant something else.
“I do need more tests,” Matt told Mae Worsley, whom he’d called back in after he’d finished examining Josh.
“Is something wrong?” She looked worried.
“I’m not surge. That’s why I need the tests.”
“You might as well do them now,” she said. “It’ll save me coming in again. We only got one car.”
“He’ll need to go to the hospital in Charlottesville, maybe stay overnight.”
Her body stilled, and her entire being seemed to concentrate itself in her eyes, which were focused on him. “Something is wrong. What is it? What can I do to fix it?”
“I can’t be sure until I see the test’s results.”
He couldn’t help but admire this small, modest country woman. She didn’t fall apart or start crying hysterically. She knew he was talking about the possibility of something life-threatening to her precious child. Her thoughts were centered entirely on what she had to do to help her son. She’d deal with her own feelings later, in private.
“His father and I have never been out of the valley,” she said. “You’ll have to tell us what to do.”
“I’ll make all the arrangements. All you have to do is take Josh to the hospital.”
“When?”
“I’ll call you as soon as I know, probably tomorrow.”
That one word tomorrow, told her it was serious. She stood, her steady and direct gaze fixed on him. “We’ll be ready.”
“Come by here before you leave. I’ll have maps and directions for you.”
She held out her hand. “You’ve been very nice.”
“It’s my job.”
But after she left, he dropped in his chair. How had he ended up with a job that required him to tell a mother her child might die?
Liz couldn’t decide whether she was simply lusting after a handsome man, or if she was falling in love with Matt. Either way, she couldn’t continue to avoid him, refusing to speak of what she thought they both knew lay between them. She couldn’t expect him to bring it up. He’d told her from the beginning exactly where he stood on marriage, small towns and his career. Falling in love with her would be the antithesis of everything he wanted for himself. But she had to know, had to have it in words.
She waited for him after his last patient. It would be easier to talk while they walked home through the heat of the July afternoon. Too many attentive ears at home or in the office. She might be about to make a fool of herself. She didn’t want anybody listening.
“I thought you’d be gone,” Matt said when he saw her.
“I had some work to finish up.”
He didn’t seem nervous. Not even wary. In fact, he seemed pleased to see her. He’d been looking rather down the past few days. It was nice to see him smile.
“You work too hard,” he said.
“Not half as hard as you.”
“I don’t have much choice. There’s nobody else to see patients.”
“And there’s nobody else to run the office.”
He smiled at her again, and her heart tried to jump into her throat. “How does it feel to be indispensable?”
“I might be indispensable to my children, but not to anyone else.”
“Well I can’t do without you. The office wouldn’t run half as smoothly.”
The afternoon sun shone with waning brightness and warmth. Spencer Mountain rose in the distance, its summit shrouded in mist. A cool breeze, laden with moisture and the scent of humus and wet leaves, flowed down from its tree-shaded slopes to rustle leaves of the ancient oaks that shaded the white clapboard houses of Iron Springs.
The setting was idyllic. The time, the lazy end of the day. And the most romantic thing Matt Dennis could manage to say was that she was indispensable to the running of the clinic.
“Are you going to Charlottesville this weekend? I don’t think you should,” she continued before he could answer. “The crafts fair starts Friday. It’s the biggest weekend of the summer. It would be a crime to miss it.”
“Are you going?”
“Of course. I usually take a picnic, even though it’s only five minutes from the house. The kids like to eat on the lawn and play down by the lake. Why don’t you come with us? The children will be upset if you don’t.”
Coward! She wasn’t asking him for the children. She was asking him for herself. Was she afraid the prospect of spending the afternoon in her company wasn’t enough to lure him from Charlottesville?
“What are you fixing to eat?”
“I thought that old saw about getting to a man through his stomach had gone by the boards.”
“As one of my foster parents said, it’s important to enjoy anything you have to do three times a day.”
He was smiling; he seemed perfectly relaxed. Then why had he tried to avoid her for so long?
If he’d been wrestling with his own questions, trying to make up his mind about her, he’d apparently succeeded. Only she didn’t know what he’d decided. Whatever it was, he seemed comfortable with it. That didn’t bode well for her. If he was about to violate everything he’d ever thought he believed in life, he’d be upset.
“The children have put in a request for hot dogs. I usually have potato salad and fried chicken for me. Lemonade to drink, chocolate-chip cookies for dessert.”
“How do you make your potato salad?”
“With pickles, eggs, and mayonnaise. Is there another way?”
“With mustard, onions, and celery seeds.” He made a face. “It’s as bad as it sounds.”
“Can I bribe you with anything else?”
“No. Just hold out two short thighs for me, and I’ll bless your name.”
“If I’d known you were that easy, I’d have served fried chicken before.”
They turned the corner at Hannah’s Drugs only to meet Hannah standing on the steps talking to Solomon Trinket.
“You coming to the fair?” Hannah asked Matt.
“Liz has just talked me into it,” he answered.
“I had to bribe him with two chicken legs.”
“I’ll bet that’s not the only legs he’s got his eyes on,” Solomon said, chuckling wickedly.
Hannah hit him over the head with her baseball cap.
“I declare, Solomon Trinket, you get worse every day. If you don’t die soon, we’ll have to bury you alive just to keep the town from getting a bad name.”
“I’m just telling the truth,” he said with another chuckle. “Can’t no red-blooded man ignore Liz’s legs.”
“Speak for yourself, you old coot,” Hannah said, giving him another swipe with her hat “Not that you’ve got any blood left to speak of.”
“I think Liz has great legs,” Matt said, winking at Solomon. “I intend to look at them as often as I can.”
Matt winked again, and Solomon indulged in a wheezing laugh.
“Ignore them,” Liz told Hannah.
“”Shoot ‘em’ is what I say,” Hannah replied.
“I’m leaving,” Matt said, starting across the street. “I’m not through looking at legs yet.”
“It would serve you right if I wore pants,” Liz said when she caught up with him.
“Then you’d pass out from the heat, and I’d get to carry you home.”
Liz couldn’t understand the change in Matt’s attitude. Maybe she’d just imagined he was avoiding her when she was doing all the avoiding herself. She didn’t know, but either he’d changed his attitude toward her or she’d misjudged something.
“It’ll be more likely that I have to carry you home in a wheelbarrow after Ben and Rebecca keep you playing kick ball all afternoon,” she said. “It won’t be an easy game like usual. All the kids will be there.”
“Good. It’ll give me a chance to work off some of the pounds I’ve gained eating your food.”
Liz would have liked to have had Matt to herself a little longer—she hadn’t felt so comfortable around him in days—but the children had seen them long before they reached the house. They came running down the sidewalk.
“What are you doing here?” she asked as she caught Ben in one arm, Rebecca in the other. “I thought you were staying with Aunt Marian.”
“She said she was tired of campers,” Rebecca announced. “She said she could put up with us but not two hundred campers.”
“She made Hawaiian punch,” Ben announced. A bright red line on his upper lip indicated he’d had more than his share. He took hold of Matt’s hand. “You can have some, too.”
“Don’t I get any?” Liz asked.
“There’s lots,” Rebecca said. “Aunt Marian said she wasn’t moving until supper. She said she was staying and you were fixing.”
“She’s real tired of campers,” Ben announced.
They headed for the backyard and the glasses of punch, Rebecca holding Liz’s hand and Ben hanging on to Matt. Liz liked the feeling.
Matt lay in the bed staring at the ceiling, sleep an abandoned hope. It was Saturday, the day of the crafts fair. Everything in Iron
Springs was closed. People had come from miles around. Last night a high-school band had played a concert in the shell behind the hotel. Tonight a jazz ensemble would perform. On Sunday there’d be cloggers. It would be a celebration, and he was going to spend it with Liz.
He’d given up trying to pretend he wasn’t strongly attracted to her. It was foolish to keep denying the obvious. He’d also given up trying to hide from her. He’d never been a man to run from anything. Yet from the moment he arrived in Iron Springs, he’d been running from just about anyone and everything in sight. He supposed he sensed long before it became conscious thought that something here threatened the plan he’d made for his life.
He now knew that something was Liz...and her children... and people like Salome Halfacre and Aunt Marian. He’d never come across a community like this. He hadn’t known they existed. He’d assumed every place was like Gull’s Landing.
Despite Dr. Andrews’s efforts, he was going to be in Iron Springs for a year. He might as well relax and enjoy himself when he could. That meant being with Liz as often as possible, admitting he liked her, taking a chance things could become even more serious than that.
They’d both tried to keep it from happening. There was nothing but pain and unhappiness ahead if they let their feelings get out of control. He imagined Liz had had enough of that already. He knew he had. He had vowed long ago that he would never again give anyone the power to hurt him.
But the force that was drawing them together was stronger than either one of them. Despite his best efforts, he couldn’t control his feelings any longer. There were times when he felt so tense, so rigid, he was certain he’d break. It seemed better to bend just a little.
So he would go to the fair. He would enjoy the picnic and the roughhousing. He would stare at her legs and steal as many kisses as she would allow. He would enjoy not feeling the loneliness that had been his constant companion since his adoptive parents gave him up.
But he wouldn’t bend very much. He would remember that letting himself like people meant his getting hurt.
Several hours later, Matt staggered over to Liz’s blanket and collapsed. “I don’t care what they want to play next, I’m not moving for at least an hour,” he said between labored breaths. “I’m too old to keep up with those kids.”
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