Resilient

by Gillian Archer

  “Whatever beef I have with Nicole is between the two of us, but she’s under club protection. She’s like a sister to Jessica and Emily. That means she’s family to me and Zag. I don’t need to remind you that we protect our own, against our own if need be.”

  I narrowed my eyes but still didn’t rise to Reb’s bait. Whether he was really threatening me or only baiting me to see where Nicole and I stood, I didn’t give a fuck. I was insulted he felt the need to say anything at all. Not that I let him know that. More than most, I knew the purpose of hierarchy and respecting my elders. Instead I stood there, expressionless, until Reb finally left.

  I closed the door then crossed to my pile of clothes still on the coffee table. As I pulled my T-shirt over my head, I remembered the look on Nicole’s face when she backed away from Reb. That was the expression of someone who’d been burned by a man before. Violently. Maybe even literally. The fact that she hadn’t felt comfortable enough to turn her back on us made my blood run cold. Who had screwed with Nicole so bad that she didn’t feel safe in her own home?

  After shrugging my vest on, I sat and laced up my boots. I looked around her living room for some clue to her background, but the only pictures on display were of her and Em and Jessica. No family. No boyfriends. No answers.

  I settled in to wait. No way was I leaving her on her own to get to Tahoe. And no way was I gonna let her be the one to end our one night together on a note like that.

  Five minutes later Nicole stomped down the hallway, her hair still wet from the shower, thumbing through her cell phone. I waited patiently for her to look up to notice me.

  “…four, five texts. Oh, Christ, I hope she doesn’t tell Jessica. That’s all I need today,” Nicole muttered on her way to the minuscule kitchen.

  Fuck, I could’ve been anyone waiting in her living room. She didn’t even know if I’d locked the front door when I supposedly left. Where were her survival instincts? I cleared my throat to get her attention.

  She jumped three feet in the air. “You son of a bitch! What the hell are you still doing here?”

  “Where are your survival instincts? I’ve been sitting here since you walked in and you didn’t fucking notice. I could’ve been a goddamn serial killer.”

  “No, you’re just the mistake I made last night that won’t leave.”

  “That’s not what you said last night, baby girl. And I didn’t feel like leaving since I knew you didn’t have a ride to the wedding.”

  “Don’t call me that. I booked an Uber.”

  “Well, fucking cancel it, baby girl. I’m taking you.”

  “No, you’re not. We said one and done. And for those who are keeping track, today makes two.”

  “So fucking what? One, two…What difference does it make?”

  “I guess you didn’t do very well in math in school. Okay, I’m gonna break it down for you. This many is one.” A smart-ass grin curved her lips as she held up her right middle finger. Then the left middle finger came up. “And this many is two.”

  I couldn’t hold back my laughter. I full on belly laughed until a tear ran down my cheek. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d laughed so hard or so long. It felt like I’d spent the last hour doing crunches. Christ, I had to be careful with this one—she could very easily make me forget that I wasn’t a forever kinda guy. The thought sobered me right up. “Thanks for that. I think I’m clear on my math now. You got all your shit together? You ready to go?”

  “I told you already—I’m good; I called an Uber. So you can go on your merry way. On your bike. Alone.” She made a shooing motion with her hands.

  I grinned back at her and settled deeper into the couch. Just then her phone chimed.

  “See? My ride’s here. You can go now.” After another annoying shooing motion, she walked down the hall presumably to get the rest of her wedding crap together.

  I seized the opportunity to go dismiss her Uber driver.

  Her hired car was just leaving and I was returning to her apartment as she came out the front door.

  “What did you do?”

  “Looks like you need a ride to the wedding after all. Let’s go.”

  “You son of a bitch! You know you just tanked my passenger rating, right? How the hell am I going to book rides now?”

  “You don’t need to book a ride today. Get on.”

  “Argh!” Tossing her garment bag over her arm, she walked over to my bike. “Well? Are you coming? You fucking engineered this whole thing after all. So let’s go.”

  I smothered my grin behind a fake cough. “Yes, ma’am.”

  It took a few minutes to get her garment bag strapped into my saddle bag and then we were on the road. I wasn’t the type to crow about winning, but I gotta say it felt pretty damn good to have her arms wrapped around me again as we rode toward my house. Her firm tits pressed into my back as I took a corner a little faster than she was comfortable with, judging by the way she gripped my waist. I silently wished for my erection to go away. It really made riding a motorcycle uncomfortable. Especially when she leaned into me like that. Fuck.

  Fortunately, we made it to my house before I blew my load. Which I guess was a good thing. I was still adjusting myself when Nicole stomped around my driveway to where my truck was parked.

  “Well?” She crossed her arms over her amazing rack while she glared at me. “What are you waiting for?”

  “I need five minutes. I gotta grab my shit and feed Stella.”

  “Five minutes? You didn’t say anything about that when you hijacked my ride. I’d be in my own car and halfway to Tahoe by now if you hadn’t kidnapped me,” Nicole bitched as we climbed the steps in front of my Craftsman house. Suddenly she froze on the second-to-last step. “Oh, shit. That’s your deal, isn’t it? You kidnap unsuspecting women and hold them hostage in your house. Do you keep Stella in a box under your bed like that one movie? People know I’m with you. Emily and Reb saw you at my place. Em will find me.”

  “Christ, you’re nutty. Where was this paranoia when I was alone at your house?” I paused as I filtered through my key ring. “Stella is my dog. I don’t have a woman living in a box under my bed.”

  “Oh.”

  I unlocked the front door and gestured for her to enter before me. Just as she passed by me I whispered, “But the position is open if you’re interested.”

  The expression on her face was priceless.

  I slammed the door shut behind me and shook my head as I walked toward the kitchen. “You’re too fucking easy to bait.”

  “Fuck you.”

  “Rain check? I gotta be in Tahoe ASAP.” I was still chuckling as I portioned out the combination of wet and dry dog food guaranteed to kick-start Stella’s appetite. In the other room I could hear Nicole crooning to Stella.

  “Oooooh, aren’t you a gorgeous puppy? You look much too nice to live with that s.o.b. in the other room.”

  I ignored Nicole’s bait and whistled for Stella. “Breakfast! Come here, girl.”

  A beat later Stella stepped surefooted around the corner and into the kitchen despite the two cataracts that had left her blind.

  “Over here, girl.” I clicked my tongue to turn her toward me and placed the bowl of food on the floor. Once Stella dug into her food, I left the kitchen and walked down the hallway to my bedroom.

  “You’ve got four minutes!”

  Shaking my head at Nicole’s literal keeping of time, I tossed together a bag of clothes for the wedding and tomorrow and a few toiletries I couldn’t live without—mostly condoms. Then I returned to the front room and dropped the bag at Nicole’s feet. “I gotta give Stella her medication, then we’ll roll.”

  “Medicine? What’s wrong with her?” Nicole dogged my heels as I walked into the kitchen again.

  Fuck, where did I begin to answer that question? I kept it simple. “Diabetes. She needs insulin.”

  “Wait, dogs can get diabetes?”

  I grunted in reply as I drew the syringe to the prescribed am
ount of insulin.

  “But she’s not fat.”

  “Apparently German shepherds, especially females, can be prone to developing diabetes. She was diagnosed when she was six.”

  “Huh, how old is she now?”

  “Eleven.”

  “So you’ve been giving her insulin every day for five years?”

  “Twice a day.”

  “Wow.” Nicole watched as I injected Stella’s dose of insulin. “Who’s taking care of her while you’re at the wedding?”

  “A neighbor.”

  “Oh.”

  I tossed the needle into an empty two-liter bottle and gave Stella a good, deep rub. I’d had her for eight years, ever since that day my doctor made me go to Paws and Stripes. I’d been so paranoid that everyone was out to get me. When people whispered, it had to be about me. It had gotten to the point where I couldn’t even let anyone touch me—let alone show any type of physical affection toward me. I’d driven everyone away with my shitty attitude—my ex, Abby, my mom, my sister. But Stella changed all that. She was the only woman who stood by me. She saved me. So I didn’t mind that it was my turn to save her. I could tell her hind legs were bothering her. For the past year, they trembled almost every time she stood up. Now they trembled even when she was lying down. I knew she didn’t have much more time left, but I couldn’t think about that right now—she was fine at the moment, and I had a bridesmaid to get to a wedding.

  “Let’s go.” If my voice was a little husky, Nicole didn’t mention it.

  Chapter 9

  Nicole

  The trip to Tahoe was the most maddening, frustrating car ride of my life. Despite his cute and cuddly dog, I was still pissed that he’d all but kidnapped me. Really, I wanted to be in my own car, listening to my own music, and de-stressing before I got to Tahoe and the craziness of Bridezilla Jessica. And okay, maybe I was still pouting a bit. We’d spent most of the hour with his choice of hard rock filling the silence between us. He only turned it down once when we sailed through the McDonald’s morning drive-through for Egg McMuffins and coffee. Kinda made it harder to hate him as much when I knew we shared the same taste in music and food.

  I still wasn’t forgiving him, though. Despite his love for his geriatric, diabetic German shepherd. Despite his refusal of my money for breakfast. And despite his love of Led Zeppelin. And especially despite the three orgasms he gave me last night.

  It was that last one that was a little bit harder to forget about.

  I was reminded of his skill last night every time I glanced at his hands, or his lips, or his lap. Taking a peak at his jean-covered crotch made me blush as I remembered that piercing and how it felt when he was inside me.

  Dammit. I couldn’t think like that. He was a caveman alpha biker. I couldn’t forget that. He’d hijacked my Uber ride and had probably tanked my passenger rating with the, I assumed, rude way he’d dismissed the driver.

  I still couldn’t get that image of him cuddling his old, blind dog out of my head. The juxtaposition of sweet, old dog and hard, badass biker was heart-melting. And confusing. Just who the hell was Tank?

  I’d never been more relieved than when we pulled up to the outdoor wedding venue. The second his truck cruised to a stop, I ripped open the passenger door and bailed out. I was fifteen feet away before Tank’s shouts stopped me.

  “Do you want your dress now or do you wanna try to find me later?”

  Heaving a huge sigh, I retraced my steps and accepted my huge garment bag from him with a muttered, “Thanks.”

  But he didn’t let go. We silently grappled over it for a minute before I threw my hands in the air in frustration. “Fine! You wear the damn thing. I’m sure you’ll look great on Hatchet’s arm in the pictures.”

  “Christ, you’re a tough nut to crack. All I want is a little thank-you. Or even better, a thank-you kiss.”

  “Sounds good to me. You can kiss my as—”

  “Nicole! There you are! Where have you been?” Jessica yelled from the other side of the parking lot. “Emily and Reb got here an hour ago! We have to set up the chairs for the wedding ceremony, then go over to the reception hall and decorate the tables. And why the hell are you still in the parking lot? Get the lead out already!”

  “Saved by the Bridezilla.” I tugged my dress out of Tank’s hands, then took a few steps toward Jessica’s end of the parking lot—where she was still jabbering away about today’s to-do list. But before I got too far away I looked back over my shoulder to find Tank’s eyes on my ass.

  Apparently I wasn’t the only one who was still thinking of last night.

  I put a little extra sway into my step as I walked away.

  —

  In contrast to the past week, Jessica was oddly calm today. When her mom, Donna, noticed that the reception venue forgot to include the round mirrors for the centerpieces to sit on, we all held our breath waiting for the epic freak-out to begin. But Jessica just shrugged.

  “Do you want me to find the coordinator and get them to dig the mirrors out?” Donna asked as she wrung her hands.

  “No, it’s fine, Mom.” Jessica plopped a bowl on the center of the table and began to pour glass beads into it. “See, it looks fine without the mirror. Maybe go find someone to ask about pitchers of water so we can fill up the bowls for the floating candles, though.”

  Emily and I stood at the table frozen. I was afraid that any small move on my part might cause Jessica to lose that precious shred of sanity she’d finally found. Meanwhile, Jessica spread a few rose petals around the base of the centerpiece bowl.

  “You’re taking this really well,” I said slowly and without making any sudden movements.

  “There’s no point in worrying about it now. I spent the last few weeks obsessively getting all my ducks in a row, but it feels silly now. I’m marrying the most amazing man, who loves me and our daughter. Who cares if there aren’t mirrors on the table, or if the tuxedo place forgot my dad’s vest? All that matters is that tonight I’m becoming Mrs. Zag Cooper. Everything else is just filler.”

  Emily smiled. “That’s very adult of you.”

  “Right?” Jessica laughed. “It’s about time. I am a mother after all.”

  “Where is Harley? I haven’t seen her this morning.” I looked around the reception hall but didn’t see any sign of Jessica and Zag’s three-month-old baby.

  “She’s with her daddy. Apparently my manic craziness was obvious to even him. He wanted to give me a break so I could help set up the venue.”

  “And get Harley out of the line of fire,” I added sotto voce.

  “What the hell do you mean by that? I would never hit my child.”

  “Oh, whoa. Sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. I was just thinking that a crying, fussing baby isn’t the easiest or most calming thing for a stressed-out bride. I just—”

  “Wasn’t thinking. Maybe you need to start. I don’t need your pessimistic, angry-girl vibe today, Nic. I’m getting married to the guy I love. The one who makes me feel special and safe and loved. I need your support today, not your mouth.”

  “I do. I am. I just…I’m sorry. It’s your wedding day. I want to be here for you. I’m just…”

  “I think her brain is fried because she slept with Tank last night,” Emily interjected.

  “Em!” I yelled.

  “What? It’s not like it was a state secret. Everyone saw you two leaving together last night.” Emily turned to Jessica. “Her car is still at Reb’s house.”

  “Really? Wow.” Jessica’s eyes were the size of watermelons.

  I glared at Emily. “What’s the big deal? You guys know I’ve had one-night stands before. So what?”

  Jessica snorted. “So, you slept with a biker. You, Nicole Evelyn Walker, slept with a biker. Not a computer programmer or a bartender. A biker.”

  “Okay, you guys are blowing things way out of proportion.” I fussed with the flower petals on the table and refused to make eye contact. “It’s not that big a deal.”


  Jessica’s eyebrows rose. “What was it you said when Emily hooked up with Reb? That we had nabbed the ‘only decent bikers in the whole country’? Sounds like someone changed their stance on bikers.”

  I shrugged. I had a hard time putting my thoughts into words, and now more than ever the secret that I kept from them burned at my soul. I wanted to tell my friends about my past, but I didn’t know how. It’d been so long, and so much had happened in the past year and a half. Besides, it was Jessica’s wedding day. I couldn’t ruin it with my drama.

  So I said nothing.

  Not that it stopped them from teasing me.

  “So are you guys gonna start seeing each other?” Emily asked.

  I shrugged.

  “So spill! I want details, girl.” Jessica leaned closer. “Tell us about Tank’s body. Is it hot? He’s so big. He looks so hard and just buff. Does he have muscles all over? How big is his co—”

  “Jessica. Misty. Miller. Did you just say what I think you did?” Donna’s horrified voice broke our little huddle with the efficiency of a pipe bomb.

  Jessica rolled her eyes at me and Emily. “Not technically, Mom. You yelled at me before I could finish saying co—”

  “Oh my god! What is the matter with you? We’re standing in God’s house and you’re saying such nasty things with your filthy mouth. I raised you so much better than that.”

  “Actually this is a casino event space, Mrs. Miller.” I couldn’t help but wade in when I saw Jessica shrinking in the face of her mom’s ire. Jessica might’ve become a more brazen woman while living in sin with Zag for the past year and a half, but even she couldn’t hold up to the scrutiny of her disapproving mother.

  “It’s where she’s getting married. Same difference.” Mrs. Miller retorted as she walked to the other side of the hall muttering to herself.

  Jessica, Emily, and I tried to muffle our laughter out of respect.

  —

  The wedding was gorgeous, moving, and amazing. Jessica looked so vibrant in her wedding dress as her dad walked her down the aisle. And Zag looked every bit like a man in love. Especially when he didn’t even wait for the ceremony to begin before he kissed Jessica. It was the perfect wedding Jessica had dreamed of.