by Lyons, Rene
She regarded him stoically. “You mean you won’t.”
He sensed how close to hating him she was. The thought sent him into a fury. With a will all its own, his hand shot out and he grabbed her roughly by the arm. His upper lip curled back in a fierce snarl. She stared at him coolly, unmoved by his display of anger.
“Get your hand off of me.”
He knew he was hurting her, yet he didn’t ease up on his hold. “What the fuck do you want from me, Lexine?” He ground the words out from between his clenched fangs.
“The truth. You do know what that is, don’t you Constantine?”
“You want the truth? You want to hear that my father put a bloody sword to my throat and threatened to kill me when I was but ten years old? And that my bitch of a mother told me she hated me before I even took my first breath?” His fingers bit into her arm. “Or do you want to hear how Ulric liked young boys? I spent my fifteenth birthday facedown on a mattress stained with my own blood, sweat and vomit while the fucker destroyed what was left of my soul. You know what I got for it?”
He dragged her in closer. “Constantine, stop.”
“This. This is what I got for it.” He turned his head so she could get a good look at his scar. “I killed the bastard a year later. I slit his throat and watched him bleed to death. Isobel paid Guy Sinclair to take me on. I went off on Crusade to get out of England before I could be arrested and charged with murder.” He shoved her away. “So now you know why I hesitated to throw you on the bed, fuck you and then steal the blood from your veins.”
She stumbled back a step, righted herself and wiped the tears from her cheeks. He turned away from her, ready to hate her for her pity. Ready for her disgust. Instead, she gave him her love.
“I’d say I’m sorry for what you’ve suffered but I know you’ll only take it as pity. Instead, all I can tell you is I love you, Constantine.”
“How the fuck can you love me?”
Her smile nearly brought him to his knees. “How can I not?”
A growl came from the back of his throat as Constantine pushed past her. She watched him silently as he pulled on a shirt and grabbed his baldric and trench.
“Please don’t go.”
He clenched his baldric in his fist. It took everything not to fall to his knees and beg her to forgive him.
Instead, he turned and walked out, Lex’s sad cries following him out of the keep and into the courtyard.
There, under the pale glow of the moon, Constantine swore he heard Ulric’s evil laugh echo on the cold night air. Or was it the devil laughing, waiting none-too patiently for his due?
* * *
Stunned, Lex couldn’t believe Constantine had left. Nor could she believe the things he’d told her. Going over to the door, she flattened her palm against the aged wood. “Come back.”
She whispered that to no one as she dropped her forehead against the door. Try as she might, she couldn’t will herself to stop crying as the implication of what Constantine said sank into her mind. He’d spent his fifteenth birthday facedown on a mattress in a puddle of his own blood and vomit. Ulric had liked young boys.
Oh God, it can’t mean what I think it does. Please tell me I’m wrong.
But Lex knew Constantine had meant it exactly how it came out. No wonder he hated the scar on his cheek. How could he not when it was a constant reminder of his past?
Her heart broke into a thousand pieces as all of her anger drained out of her. Everything fell into place about him now. His anger, his reluctance to take her blood—even the way he made love to her—it all came together in one big, ugly picture of the horrors of his life.
Lex pressed her back against the door, and slid to the floor, unable to stop her tears as she did so. Her soul hurt. For the first time since Christian died she was furious, hurt and miserable all at once. To vent these turbulent emotions, Lex wanted to scream. She wished to God she could go back in time and hurt the bastard who’d tortured Constantine.
The things Constantine must have suffered were unimaginable wrongs that could never be undone. There was nothing Lex could do or say to take away the memories. No amount of time would erase the atrocities from Constantine’s mind and his body. All Lex could do was continue to offer him her love, and hope it was enough to give him peace as Constantine moved through a world that had used him and then spit him out.
Why?
Why would someone hurt him like that? What sick monster would do that to a child? No wonder Constantine had lost his faith. How could he not when God stood back and allowed one of His children to be so hurt?
Raw pain ripped through Lex. It robbed her of her breath. It stabbed at her brain and twisted her stomach. Her mouth ran dry and her body went numb with the force of it. She dropped her head in her hands to stifle the violent cries torn from her when she thought of all her proud warrior had been forced to endure alone.
She saw the night he was cut in her mind. Lex saw Constantine, as he once was, a scared boy. Bleeding. Hurting. She saw him as the man he grew to be, a warrior-monk battling the demons of his life as he fought under the relentless sun on a field of sand. The blood red cross on his white tunic a symbol he no longer believed in.
Then there was that dark, and agony, and the echo of screams all around him as the stench of blood and sweat filled the air. Chinon. Then came the flames that licked at his flesh, burning him to death. She saw Michael, golden, beautiful and ferocious. She jerked, her back slamming into the door as a horrific stab pierced her chest. She grabbed the front of her shirt, her heart and soul felt as if they were being torn from her.
In a flash of an instant the past was gone. Lex was jarred back to reality by a soft knock on the door. Startled, she jumped up and opened the door, wishing she could be left alone. She needed to think, needed to work through what had just happened. Her heart hurt and all she wanted to do was crawl into bed and cry.
She knew damn well she was losing Constantine to his past and the pain that realization brought was something she needed to deal with—not whatever new problem awaited her on the other side of that door.
Which was why when Lex saw Angelina, she wanted to tell her to go away and slam the door shut. Of course, she’d never do anything so rude. Instead, she made sure no tears wetted her face and asked Angelina what she wanted.
“I hate to bother you, but Isobel asked me to get you. She needs to speak with you.”
Lex shook her head. “Now isn’t a good time. Can you please tell Isobel... ?”
“It’s urgent, Lexine.”
Isn’t it always? In the last month or so, Lex learned swiftly that everything was urgent in this world of darkness and shadows. There always seemed to be some sort of catastrophic event about to take place. Honestly, though, right then she couldn’t care less if the entire world was about to fall down around them. All that mattered to her was Constantine was in pain and there was nothing she could do to help him through it.
Lex saw the determined gleam in Angelina’s eyes. Dragging a hand through her hair to move the tangled mass away from her tear-streaked face, she knew the vampire wouldn’t be dismissed. Sighing loud and long, Lex realized this was a battle she couldn’t win. Seemed there were a lot of those taking place tonight.
“Let me go get Constantine.”
Angelica shook her head frantically. “No. Isobel made it very clear her words are for you alone.” Well now, that didn’t bode well. Lex’s hand flew guiltily to where Constantine had bitten her. Angelina’s gaze followed. She also shot Lex’s bloody robes a curious look. Damn, she should have changed out of them. “Isobel knows Constantine took blood from you.”
Lex went numb with dread. “But she told Constantine he could.”
Angelina offered a sympathetic look. “Just because Isobel told him he could didn’t mean he should.”
Lex began to wring her hands together. “But he didn’t mean it. I swear he didn’t.”
Angelina’s smile calmed her somewhat. “All will be we
ll, Lexine. Trust me.”
Left with no other choice, Lex numbly followed behind Angelina as she was once again led down the endless corridor. It seemed, as she went, reproach lit the eyes of the women in the oil paintings. The feeling was unnerving.
“Please don’t let them hurt him.”
Lex assumed Isobel awaited her in the hall, which was why she was surprised—and instantly on guard—when they reached the bottom of the stairs and Lex saw Isobel was not there. “Where are we going?”
Angelina’s reassuring smile didn’t quite reach her eyes, further setting off alarm bells in Lex’s mind. “Isobel wanted privacy. This is such a sensitive matter, after all.”
No one else was here besides them. Madeline and Lenora had gone to feed. Daria was off doing God knows whatever it was that one did. Constantine had stormed out of the keep. That left only Angelina, who because of her fear of Constantine, kept her distance from them all. Besides, if Isobel wanted privacy, she could have had Angelina bring her to her private chamber.
Something wasn’t right.
And Angelina obviously sensed Lex’s apprehension. “Fear not, Lexine. I’m sure Isobel has her reasons for keeping these matters so covert.”
That did nothing to quiet the dread screaming at her. As Angelina ushered her across the hall and out of the keep—making for the gate, Lex dug her bare feet into the dirt and tried to pull Angelina to a stop.
“Hurry, Lexine.”
“Stop, Angelina. I’m not going anywhere. If Isobel wants me, tell her I’ll be waiting for her in the hall.”
Angelina’s hold on her arm tightened. “Well now, this isn’t good at all.”
Angelina glared at the sentinels. Lex’s jaw dropped at their barely visible nod. She realized their loyalty lay somewhere other than with the Order.
To put it as bluntly as Constantine would, Lex knew she was pretty much fucked.
As much as Lex didn’t want to believe a member of the Order would betray the First, when the portcullis began to rise, and she caught sight of the car parked near the gatehouse, there was no denying how dire this situation was.
Lex tried to pull away from her, but Angelina held her fast. “Let go of me.”
A slow smile curled the vampire’s lips. “I don’t think so, Daystar.”
Knowing she couldn’t outfight a vampire’s strength, Lex had only one weapon at her disposal. She could try to harness her power and use it to stun Angelina. Unfortunately, she was caught up in emotions too strong for her to get a handle on it. Left with one resource, Lex let out a scream that broke the perfect quiet of the night.
Angelina twisted her wrist. “Scream again and I’ll rip your arm right off.”
The threat, combined with the pain of having her wrist nearly broken, brought Lex to her knees. There was enough malice in Angelina’s tone to leave no doubt she would make good on the threat.
Lex gritted her teeth against the pain. “Why are you doing this?”
“Preservation of my existence.”
Lex found the strength to fight the pain and rise to her feet. If living around the Templars had taught her anything, it was to never go out on your knees. “Then you went about it wrong because I can assure you, Constantine is going to send you right to hell.”
Lex saw her own death in Angelina’s eyes. The vampire let out a vicious snarl a moment before she punched Lex across the face. Stunned, she flew from Angelina’s grasp and landed in the dirt. Just before she slipped into unconsciousness, Lex saw an arrow whiz overhead. Her eyes slid shut as one of the guards atop the gatehouse fell, an arrow protruding from his chest.
Unwilling to admit defeat, Angelina dragged the unconscious Hallowed over to the car as another arrow shot by her. She tossed Lexine into the backseat and slammed the door shut. All she had to do was get safely past the gates. The guards would then drop the portcullis and buy her the few precious moments she needed to get away.
A hail of gunfire exploded over her head as the guards fired at Isobel and Daria, the latter shooting back with her crossbow. Daria was dead on with her aim. Another of the remaining three guards fell.
But when an arrow caught her in her right shoulder, Angelina hissed at the impact. It winded her enough to slow her as she pulled open the driver’s door. A second later she was hit again. The second arrow slammed into her back. She might have still tried to get away, but the second fallen guard had been the one raising the portcullis. It slammed closed, marking the end of her futile attempt to escape with the Hallowed.
Angelina admitted defeat.
She’d failed Julian.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Constantine stabbed his sword into the ground and dropped to his knees. Lex’s taste was still in his mouth and her blood continued to flow through him. Her power was a living force within him. For that one miracle of a moment after he’d taken in her blood, he’d been alive again. Her power had given him one glorious second of life.
Normally, by now, the effects of taking in blood would have left him cold. Not so with Lex. Her lifeforce continued to thunder in him. When he’d taken her blood into his body, he had felt her soul move through him.
Though Constantine understood why Lex had pushed him about his past, he told her things he’d never wanted her to know. His eyes slid closed as he prayed to God for the strength to go on now that he was certain he’d earned Lex’s disgust and hatred. Hell, how could she not look at him and see the ugliness of his past? Lord knew he couldn’t look at himself without the evidence staring back at him.
The haunting sight of Lex’s heartache came back to him and robbed him of strength. Of all the people who’d suffered him over the years, Lex was the one person he’d never wanted to hurt. And yet, one look into her eyes when he’d told her he’d known he could take her blood had shown him a hurt so deep it cut through him. Shame tore through him, weakening him as he stared at the sky and pleaded with God to give him the courage to face Lex after the things he’d told her.
No more. Those two words came from the empty place inside of Constantine where his soul once resided. He wanted it over. He wanted to be free of the memories of Ulric and his parents. He needed to find peace before his time here was done and he was delivered to Lucifer. Constantine had tasted happiness with Lex and God help him, but he wanted more. He wanted an eternity of it with her.
The subtle ripple in the air came at Constantine a breath of a moment before Lex’s scream rang out across the night.
Everything savage in him erupted like a terrible storm. Constantine jumped to his feet and pulled his sword from the ground. Like a man gone mad, he charged around the side of the keep. His sword high, ready to strike just as he’d done countless times running into battle. He had no thought in his mind save for the need to shed the blood of whoever dared pull such a scream from Lex.
As he rounded the keep, the scene that met him was one of chaos. He caught sight of Isobel and Daria. Bullets came at them, stopping short of where they stood. Daria released an arrow from her crossbow. The guard it was meant for managed to jump out of the way.
Near the gatehouse, slumped over the open driver’s door of a car, was Angelina. Lex was nowhere to be seen. Yet Constantine sensed her. Her fear rolled over him like a cold wave. He looked to Isobel in askance.
Isobel’s expression was bone chilling. “Angelina has Lexine.”
Heedless of his own safety, Constantine let out a battle cry and charged toward the car. At that same moment, Angelina regained consciousness and lifted herself from the door. She turned to see him running toward her, and scrambled to get into the car. Not that she would get far since the gate was down. A third arrow stuck her, stopping her vain attempt at escape. Thrown forward from the force of the hit, Angelina fell back over the door before falling to the ground, unconscious.
The chaos going on around her roused Lex. Constantine saw her head pop up in the back window. She looked dazed as she went to bolt from the backseat. She screamed and fell back inside the car when a bu
llet whizzed past her.
“No!” Isobel shrieked.
“Stay in the bloody car,” Constantine roared
Lex nodded once and threw her arms over her head before she slouched down out of his view.
Constantine continued to run toward the car. He had to get her out of there before Angelina woke. God only knew what the desperate bitch would do to Lex if he couldn’t reach her in time. He made it a few feet more when the first bullet slammed into his upper left arm. He shook it off and kept running. The second bullet grazed his right cheek and sent him stumbling back. Blood spurted into his eyes. He wiped the blood away as another bullet slammed into his left thigh. The impact felled him but he regained his footing and ran on.
A fourth bullet hit him in the lower stomach, tearing its way out through his back. It left a gaping wound in its wake and was enough to bring him down.