Roger stands beside me, his hands in his pockets, me in the same stance, neither of us speaking for the longest time. After what feels like forever, he clears his throat and begins to talk, still staring straight ahead. “Seems as though my daughter is very fond of you.”
Now I clear my throat from my nerves. “The feeling is mutual, sir.”
He turns to me, one eyebrow raised. “I don’t normally have this kind of talk with my daughter’s, eh, lovers, but Sloan said you two are going to continue seeing each other once this trip is over. I have my reservations, but I’ll keep them to myself. This is the first time in too long that my daughter has opened her heart to another man and I’m not going to stop her. Sloan is the most loving, compassionate person you will ever meet in your life, don’t take that for granted.”
The ends of my lips want to curve into a smile, but I force them to stay put. “I couldn’t agree more, Mr. Talbott.”
“Good. Then you need to know that she’s fragile and you need to hold her carefully. If you hurt her, in any shape, way or form, you’ll have me to answer to. Do we have an understanding?”
I don’t fight the smile as I nod and shake his hand. “Don’t worry, Mr. Talbott. I don’t plan on letting Sloan get hurt by me, or anyone else.” I squeeze his hand tighter at that last comment, letting him know that she’ll never go through anything again like she did the night Cooper died.
“Smitty? Daddy? What are you two doing out here?” Sloan calls to us as she walks in our direction.
Mr. Talbott turns around, letting go of my hand. “Getting some air, Sloaney.” He turns to me. “And call me Roger.” I nod as he kisses his daughter on the cheek and heads back to the party.
Sloan looks up at me with her scrunched up nose, the look she gives when she’s confused. I tap the end of her nose and laugh.
“What were you two discussing? I hope it wasn’t anything embarrassing. He didn’t tell you my nickname, did he?” Sloan groans and slumps her shoulders.
She’s absolutely adorable when she pouts. I move my fingers under her chin and make her look up at me. “No, but now inquiring minds want to know.”
Her beautiful smile returns to her face and she shakes her head. “Uh-uh, no way.” She crosses her arms to solidify her point.
Instead of arguing, I scoop her into my arms, startling her and making her cry out in surprise. I walk us further down the beach so we’re away from the party before I set her down. As soon as I do, our hands are all over each other’s bodies, kissing as though we’ve never been kissed before. Sloan’s fingers start to undo my buttons and I stop her. Something’s on my mind, I need to clear the air before things go any further.
“Lo, I can’t wait to get back to Missouri and start our relationship. I know it’s not going to be rainbows and sprinkles all the time and I know it’s too early to say this, but…I think I’m falling for you.”
She sucks in her breath, her fingers fidget with my collar. My stomach churns as I wait for her response. Slowly, her smile reappears. “What makes you think it won’t be rainbows and sprinkles all the time?”
I laugh, shaking my head. “Because it’ll be more than just the two of us. We’ll have responsibilities, family, friends that will interfere and limit our time together.” I push her hair over her shoulder, my fingers walking across her collarbone. “But no matter what, Sloan, I will always take care of you. I will always make sure you are safe and protected—”
Sloan pulls back slightly and places her hand on my chest. “That’s the second time you’ve said you’ll protect me. Where is this coming from? What makes you think I need to be protected?”
I swallow hard and move my hands to her waist so she can’t pull away when I say, “Sloan, I know about Cooper.”
Sloan
The moment my husband’s name comes out of Smitty’s mouth, tears sting my eyes. With all my might, I shove his chest, trying to get away as fast as I can. Smitty’s firm grip on my hips doesn’t let me get far. Raw emotions, emotions I haven’t felt since I pushed them deep inside, surface and tears burn as they roll down my cheeks. It’s like an out of body experience. My head shakes back and forth and I mumble words that I can’t even make out. My fists pound on his chest, fighting to get away. This is definitely flight or fight at it’s best and I’m a hot mess of both.
“Sshh, baby. Calm down, calm down.” Smitty pulls me against him, wrapping me in a bear hug and petting my hair.
My brain clears and I can start to piece together what I’m saying. My body trembles beneath his arms and my anger is still apparent. Why I am mad at Smitty, I have no idea, but no one gets to talk about my husband, good, bad, or indifferent. Pulling back so I can glare at him, I say, “You don’t know anything about Cooper, so don’t pretend that you do.”
Smitty moves one hand to my face, swiping his thumb across my cheek to wipe away my mascara-filled tears. His beautiful green eyes look deep into mine and my emotions shift yet again. “You’re right, Sloan. I didn’t know him, but I do know that he loved you. I know that he made you happy and I know it’s hard to let him go.”
Tears brim my eyes again, but instead of pulling away, I wrap my arms around his torso and hold him tightly. God, he has no idea how true any of those statements are. Softly, I cry against his chest, trying to calm myself again.
Smitty lightly kisses my forehead. “I want to know him though. I want you to tell me everything about him.”
Scrunching my nose, I look up at Smitty like he’s crazy. He just laughs and kisses my nose, wiping my tears off my face.
“He’s important to you, Sloan. You loved him, you still do. If you and I have any chance of making it together, we need to be totally honest with each other.”
Swallowing, I nod, still not fully comprehending his words. Smitty loosens his grip on me now that he knows I’m not going to bolt.
“No matter what happens with our relationship, I will never ask you to forget him.”
More tears come to my eyes and I start laughing. “How did you end up in my life, Smitty? You are too perfect for me.”
He lets out a deep chuckle and shakes his head. “I’m far from it.”
Chapter 16
Smitty
The music from the reception drifts up to the balcony. I’m leaning over the railing, listening to the party mix with the crashing of the waves on the beach. The moon is full and bright enough to light up the sky. It’s a perfect evening, except I’m still not one hundred percent where Sloan’s mind is. She hasn’t run yet, but that doesn’t mean anything. When we got back to the room, she didn’t seem as upset, but wanted to take a shower—alone. I’d be lying if I didn’t say I was a bit hurt, but I’m trying not to take it personally.
“Penny for your thoughts…” Her sultry voice calls out behind me.
When I turn around, I let out a low whistle. Her bridesmaid dress was tempting enough, but now she’s wearing the same outfit she wore the first time she stayed in my bed—my old baseball shirt with the sleeves cut off, except nothing underneath this time.
I hold out my hand for her to take. “How is it possible that you get sexier and sexier?” She takes my hand and I pull her toward me. I lightly kiss her cheek, too afraid to scare her off with any bigger movements. Her hand moves to my cheek and she looks me in the eyes. God, how I love her eyes. I could stare into them every day, and I’m hoping that’s still a possibility.
“I’m sorry about earlier. You just caught me off guard and I’ve never talked to anyone about…” She takes a long gulp before saying his name. “Cooper, aside from my family. I was just surprised that you knew.”
I nod and squeeze her hip where my hand rests. “Don’t apologize. I shouldn’t have sprung it on you quite like that.”
Sloan takes her hand in mine and pulls it to her lips, kissing my knuckles. “How did you know? No one knows…”
“Don’t get mad at him, but Will told me the story. God, Lo, I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I can’t even imagi
ne…” Well, I could imagine part of it.
Her hand tightens around mine. “Do you really want to know about Cooper?”
I nod. “Of course, he’s part of you.”
Sloan walks us to the lounge chair. I take a seat first and pull her into my lap. She curls up against me, her head on my chest. My fingers pull through her hair and she takes a deep breath.
“Cooper was the love of my life,” she starts. Wow, that’s going to be tough to live up to. “I’d dated here and there, mainly men in the fitness world since that was all I’d ever been around. You know, athletes, trainers, those kind of guys. But Cooper wasn’t one of them.”
As she speaks, I can hear a smile in her voice. It’s both harrowing and pleasing at the same time. However, I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to live up to Cooper.
“He was overweight and out of shape, but I knew the second I saw him that I was going to marry him. Everything he did was with gusto, whether it be losing weight, planning our perfect wedding, or his work. By the time we got married, he was almost half the size of when I’d met him. He never discussed his work with me. I mean I knew the basics—he had security clearance, he worked for the government, and it was top secret. So confidential that our wedding was just my immediate family and his parents and he wouldn’t let me change my last name.”
Sloan’s index finger draws circles on my chest. I watch her hand work and from the way she’s slightly bouncing in my arms, I know she’s on edge talking about him. “Sloan, you don’t have to go on if you don’t want to.”
She shakes her head and sits up. “No, I need to.” She takes a deep breath. “On our six month anniversary, a guy in a ski mask surprised us in the parking lot. Cooper begged him not to hurt me, but the guy hit me in the chin with the butt of his gun, busting it open.”
Instinctively, I reach up and touch her scar. Sloan pauses and nuzzles her face against my hand before going on. “That set Cooper off. No one treated me that way and got away with it. He was always such a gentleman, but if anyone ever so much as looked at me wrong, Cooper would call them out. He lunged for the man, which set off the gun and hit Coop in the stomach. The gunman grabbed what he wanted out of Cooper’s jacket and took off.”
I can see the tears in her eyes as I rub her back. I press my lips against her bicep and I can hear her sniffling. “Lo…”
She shakes her head. “I held him, bleeding to death in my arms for ten minutes before security found us. I pleaded for him to stay with me, but by the time the ambulance arrived, he was gone.” Silent tears roll down her cheeks. “I lost him. I lost the love of my life.” She snaps her fingers. “Poof, just like that, my happily-ever-after was gone and I was only twenty-five.”
“Sloan.” I cup her cheek, turning her face to look at me. “It’s not gone, it was just on hold.”
Her orbs of brown stare back at me. My lips caress hers and I lean our foreheads together. “You’ll always love him. That will never change, no matter who you’re with. I promise as long as you’re with me, I’ll never let you forget him or what you two had.”
Sloan squeezes her eyes closed and a tear escapes. I wipe it away as she opens them. “I had to erase everything about him. All pictures, emails, voicemails, his clothes. Our marriage license doesn’t even exist. His boss told me if would be safer for me if there was no link to him, but the more time that passes since he died, the harder it is to remember him.”
Wow. And here I had a shrine set up around my house for Caroline. I don’t know what’s worse, being totally surrounded by someone you’ve loved and lost or having them wiped out of your life completely. Looking at this successful, kindhearted woman, who has made me feel again, I’m beginning to think maybe her path was better than the one I chose.
I press my palm into her chest, over her heart. “You may not recall all the memories perfectly, but here, in your heart, you’ll never forget his love.”
Smiling and wiping her tears off her cheeks, Sloan leans down and sweeps her lips across mine. Her tongue slips across the seal of my mouth, begging to be let in. Slowly, I open my mouth and our kiss intensifies. My fingertips skim her upper arms and she moves her legs so she’s straddling me. Breaking our kiss, she lets out a contented sigh and pulls my t-shirt off herself. My hands are immediately drawn to her taut stomach and her smooth skin.
She leans down and gives me a gentle kiss. Pulling away, she mumbles, “thank you” and I nod into her kiss. She tugs at my boxers, letting my manhood spring free. Slipping on a condom and lifting her hips, she slowly slides me in. Instantly, two become one as I sit up and she wraps her legs around me, pulling me in deeper. Neither of us rush, we both just hold each other, enjoying the moment, enjoying the intimacy.
I softly kiss her shoulder and whisper, “I’ll take care of you, Sloan. Be mine and I’ll take care of you forever.”
Sloan
Smitty’s breathing is shallow as my head rests on his chest. We took our time on the deck making love. That was exactly what it was too. It wasn’t about sex or orgasms. No, it was about the two of us being one, accepting the past and moving on with our future—together. I honestly never thought I’d have a future with someone other than Cooper, especially not after his death, but Smitty’s made me believe that it could happen. Content, my finger moves in lazy circles around his chest.
Just when I think he’s asleep, he kicks his leg out from under the blanket. “Sorry, babe, it’s hot in here,” he apologizes and kisses my forehead.
Smiling, I shrug, just happy to be next to him. My hand slides over his stomach, past his waist, and stops on his Roman numerals tattoo. I turn my head to look up at him. “Okay, your turn. What’s the story behind this tattoo?”
Beneath me, Smitty’s body tenses. He pushes up so he’s leaning back against the headboard. He pulls me so I’m sitting beside him. I cross my legs and face him, taking his hand and lacing our fingers together. I give his hand a squeeze. He takes a deep breath and turns to me. His free hand runs his fingers through my hair as he looks deep into my eyes. My lips turn up at his beautiful green and yellow eyes.
“You’re not the only one that’s lost their significant other,” he says, moving his hand from my hair and touching his tattoo. “I was supposed to get married last June, the sixth. I was at the church, dressed and ready to go when I found out my bride wasn’t coming.”
I lean forward and kiss him softly, my heart aching for the pain he felt that day. At least I got six months of wedded bliss with Cooper, he wasn’t that lucky. “Smitty, I’m so sorry.”
He nods and goes on with his story. “Caroline had her hair and make-up done, but before she came to the church, she made one more stop, somewhere on Hampton Avenue. Except she didn’t make it to the church. When she was walking back to her car, a drunk driver jumped the curb and hit her.”
My head spins and I feel sick to my stomach. I was there that day, Cooper’s birthday. I talked to Smitty’s bride. She told me all about her groom. No wonder Smitty seemed so familiar to me from day one. Caroline, although I never knew her name, spoke of Jacob, aka Smitty, like the sweetheart that he is. I knew June sixth tattooed on Smitty’s leg couldn’t mean anything good.
“Like an idiot, I was hanging out, joking around at the church with Jules and the guys while Caroline lay in the street, dying. By the time I got the message that she’d been in an accident, I’d missed her phone call, missed hearing her say her last words myself, but rather in a voicemail.”
Through my tears, I can see the same in Smitty’s eyes. I want so badly to reach out to him, to console him, but he doesn’t know the truth about that day. I left before the cops arrived. They had no idea I was even there. The only proof that I was there is that voicemail left on Smitty’s phone. Smitty’s hand tightens on mine and he pulls me to him, my head against his chest.
“Caroline didn’t die in my arms, like Cooper did. No, she died alone, on the hard concrete with no one to tell her how loved she was.” Smitty pulls my chin up so I’m forc
ed to look at him. “So when I tell you, Sloan, that I’ll protect you. I mean it, not just for Cooper, but for Caroline, too. Neither of them deserved to die the way they did and I’m going to do everything in my power to keep you safe from anything and everything.”
My skin is crawling. It’s like I’ve entered the Twilight’s Zone and all I can do is nod. Quickly, I bury my head against Smitty’s chest, wrapping my arms around him tightly. I will never be able to look him in the eyes again. Above me, Smitty cries softly, stroking my hair, trying to console both of us, but he has no idea the true reason for my tears.
An hour later, his tears have quieted, my head is bobbing up and down steadily on his chest, and his breathing has shallowed. This is my chance. Slowly, inch by inch, I scoot out of his arms. Tiptoeing to my suitcase, I grab my leopard print tote and shove my essentials into it. Searching the ground, I pull on the first thing I find, which happens to be Smitty’s shirt I was wearing earlier and my torn leggings. With a pen, I write a note and leave it on the nightstand. Picking up my bag and sliding on flip flops, I watch Smitty sleep just a few moments longer then open the door and run out just as quickly as I came in. Behind me, I leave my suitcase filled with my clothes, but most importantly, I’m leaving my heart, because I won’t be giving it to anyone else again.
Chapter 17
Smitty
Mmm…only today and then Sloan’s family heads home early tomorrow. Then, I’ll get her all to myself. Well, until we get back to St. Louis, but at least back home, we won’t be surrounded by them twenty-four/seven like we are now. Not that I don’t like them. Okay, I’m talking myself into a hole. Good thing this conversation is only in my head.
Blinking, I rub my eyes, letting them adjust to the sunlight pouring in through the balcony doors. Despite the dark places we visited in memory, last night felt good. It felt like a bridge from our sorrowful pasts to our bright future. Once my eyes have adjusted, I notice Sloan’s not in bed. I throw my legs off the mattress and walk out onto our porch, Sloan loves drinking her morning coffee out there. The salty sea air greets me, but no Sloan.
Book Boyfriends Cafe Summer Lovin' Anthology 2015 Page 208