by JoAnn Ross
“Exactly. He also has free-range chickens that lay the coolest different-colored eggs.”
“I’ve met him,” Madeline said. “I was at Haven House yesterday when he delivered vegetables.”
“He is so hot,” Charity said on a long sigh.
“You’re engaged.”
“True. But that doesn’t mean I’m dead. And you have to admit, he’s gorgeous. With all that dark hair and his neon blue eyes, he reminds me a bit of a hunky artist farmer.”
It wasn’t a bad description, Madeline thought. “His vegetables certainly looked as if they could have washed off a Renaissance painting.”
“As much of a foodie place as New York City is, it sounds as if Charity’s right about your having everything you need right here,” Kara said mildly.
Surprisingly, even when her first thought had been to come winging back here like a homing pigeon, the idea had never occurred to Madeline. As much she loved Shelter Bay, her life had always been focused on learning her craft from the best chefs across Europe, then polishing her classical skills at one of the premier culinary schools in the world. After which she’d work her way up through the ranks in New York City, where, as the song went, if she could make it there, she could make it anywhere.
The dream, nourished first by her parents, then by her grandmother, had never seemed impossible. After all, the first thing she’d learned at the institute was that attitude determined altitude. And she’d come to learn with a lot of attitude.
Which, little by little, had been chipped away.
Now, although she still believed that she could beat the chef’s pants off Maxime in the culinary crucible of Manhattan, she wondered if somehow she’d gotten so focused on her youthful vision that even after having lost that focus for a while chasing after money, perhaps she’d also failed to take time to rethink her original dream.
What she wanted, what she’d always wanted, was to cook great food with integrity. To respect the land, the food, and the family farmer, the way her parents had always cooked. Undoubtedly, she could move to some rural village in Umbria or France or Greece, and do exactly that.
But, as Kara and Charity had just pointed out, the possibilities also existed here, as well. The seafood coming in every day from the rivers, streams, and Pacific Ocean was second to none. Oregon was abound with native mushrooms and berries and fruits.
And then there were more and more organic farmers embracing the farm-to-table movement. Farmers like Ethan Concannon.
“Maddy?” Kara asked, breaking into her thoughts. “Are you ready to order?”
She glanced up, surprised to see the waiter who’d arrived while her mind had been spinning with possibilities.
“Ready.” For possibly more than lunch. Perhaps, she thought, it was time not just for fine-tuning her life, but for an entirely new start.
28
Since he arrived back at Shelter Bay after the meeting with his dad’s lawyers in Portland, Lucas followed what was beginning to become a habit and dropped into Bon Temps.
“How did things go in the city?” Sax asked as Lucas climbed onto what he’d begun to think of as his stool.
“Okay. Although my head’s spinning from the numbers. I knew my dad was well-off, but I had no idea how much money he’d made over the years.”
Even with his father having been generous to various charities around the world, as the estate attorney had shown him, with judicious investing, Lucas could afford to never work another day in his life. All the way back to town, he’d been trying to figure out how to get Sofia and Maddy to let him help out with the project. Maybe if he offered to become an investor…
“So, I guess I’m going to have to start stocking more imported beer,” Sax said. “Since it sounds as if you can afford it.”
“Ha ha. Just give me something local.” Given that Oregon seemed to have gone wild about microbrewing since he’d been away, there was a bunch to choose from.
“It’s a little out of season, since it’s a winter ale, but it is raining today, and given your circumstances, it fits.” Sax reached into the cooler and pulled out a brown bottle.
Lucas laughed. “Mogul Madness Ale,” he said, reading the green and white label.
“Beats the Double Dead Guy,” Sax pointed out. “Especially since it appears you’re now a mogul.”
“Which is weird. But I guess it is better than being Double Dead. Though there were sure a lot of days I thought we might’ve been poster guys for that label.”
“Ah, the good old days.” Although he seldom drank when he was behind the bar, Sax opened a bottle for himself. “To old days. And better days yet to come.”
“I’ll drink to that,” Lucas said as they tapped bottles.
The ale was strong and dark and went down smooth, leaving tastes of nuts, berries, and something like mocha. The fact that he was even learning to distinguish the different hops and flavors told him how far he’d left those days in the mountains, jungles, and deserts behind.
“Do you ever think about them?” he asked. “The old days?”
“Not as much as I used to. Only about every other day.”
That wasn’t all that encouraging. “Scout has PTSD.” He’d left the dog with Charity while he’d gone to Portland.
“Yeah. I noticed that when Kara dropped a pan lid last night and the dog hit the flagstone patio like a Blackhawk was about to come flying over, guns blazing.”
“We’re working on the noise thing. Charity says it’ll take time.”
“I’d say she’s right. I had ghosts for a long time after I got back home.”
“Don’t we all?” There were times that the faces of all the men Lucas couldn’t save infiltrated his sleep.
“Mine were real. They actually talked with me. And rode in the car and razzed me. It freaked me out at first, then it started feeling kind of normal, like when we were a team.”
The team where Sax had ended up the sole survivor. Lucas hadn’t wanted to bring that up. But now that the man who was as close to him as any brother could have been had brought it up, he decided the topic wasn’t off-limits.
“You used the past tense.”
“Yeah. It was funny, but once I started getting more involved with Kara and Trey, and falling in love with both of them and moving on with my own life, the guys went to, well, wherever ghosts go when they get tired of sticking around.”
“So you’re okay now?”
Sax took a drink of ale and considered that. “I’m not the same guy I was back when I was a kid, raising hell, drag racing, and talking you into TPing old man Gardner’s trees.”
Lucas grinned at the memory. “And Kara’s dad took us in, called our parents, then made us spend the next week picking up litter along the road.”
“Yeah. But the upside was we made some bucks turning in all those bottles.”
Which they’d used to rent some girly magazines from Jake Woods, who owned the bait shop Sax’s parents had bought from Jake’s kids after the grizzled old guy had passed on. At least half the guys in Shelter Bay’s high school had, at least once in their lives, rented out Playboy, Penthouse, or the videos Jake had kept beneath the counter.
They were good memories, reminding Lucas that he’d managed to pack more living into summers in this small coastal town than he did the rest of the year living in Portland. Though, back then, since his dad was traveling so much, he spent a lot of time with housekeepers after the divorce.
“Then there was that summer you pretty much bailed on the rest of us for Maddy,” Sax remembered.
“That was a great summer. Most of it, anyway.” When just the memory was enough to make him hot, he tilted the bottle and enjoyed the cool slide of dark ale down his throat. “Until the end.”
“Kara says Charity told her that you told Maddy you intend to marry her.” Sax pulled out a bowl of Tabasco-hot beer nuts. “We’ve got a bet going that the story got confused. Kara believes it. So, if she wins, she gets to load up our Netflix queue with sa
ppy, romantic chick flicks from the fifties and sixties.”
“Except for that high school romance 10 Things I Hate about You, Maddy tended to be more into the old black-and-white forties flicks,” Lucas said, remembering. He also remembered buying Maddy that movie poster to hang on her wall for her eighteenth birthday. “What happens if Kara loses?”
“This is the good part. When I turn out to be right about your stepsister getting it wrong, because no way would a former teammate of mine be such a numb nut, we’re renting the entire first season of The A-Team.”
His cocky grin was a twin of the one that had gotten them all through a lot of shit over the years. Even with a horde of Taliban screaming down on them, it was hard to believe you were going to die when Sax Douchett got that grin on. “All fourteen episodes.”
“You’d better be prepared to buy Kleenex by the case, then. Because you lose.”
Sax choked on his beer. “You are freaking kidding me.”
“Nope. That’s exactly what I told Charity.” Lucas took a handful of the nuts and imagined flames coming out of his mouth.
“Okay, obviously one of those TBIs from getting blasted while not wearing your helmet all the time has boggled your brain. Because that’s about the most dumb-ass idea I’ve ever heard of. Ever hear of subtlety, cher?”
“I’ve heard of it.” He polished off the beer, hoping it would quench the flames. It didn’t. “And I’m usually a fan of the concept. I just didn’t feel it fit this situation.”
“And you thought that why?”
Lucas shrugged. “I lied to her. Big time. She says I broke her heart.”
“There’s a news flash.”
“Well, it also left a huge, gaping hole in mine, but I decided sharing that might be TMI. Under the circumstances.”
“Gee. Think so? Want another?”
“I’d better not. I’m having a meeting with her in”—Lucas glanced down at his watch—“fifteen minutes, and I want to have all my wits about me.”
“Too late. You obviously left them up in the Kush.” Sax took away Lucas’s empty bottle and filled a glass with water from the bar hose.
“That’s pretty much what Charity said. But, like I told her, I lied to Maddy last time. So I figured it was only fair that I be totally up front this time.”
“You haven’t been back that long,” Sax pointed out. “Playing devil’s advocate here, I have to ask if you’ve considered that what you really need is to get laid.”
“For your information, there’s a woman in Portland I hooked up with right after I got back, and I was doing okay in that regard. So it’s not as if I’m walking around Shelter Bay with blue balls.”
He scooped up another handful of nuts. “Do I want Maddy in my bed? Hell, yes.” And anywhere else he could have her. “But I also want her in my life.”
“Maybe you’re just tapping into old feelings.”
“Like you did with Kara. Which appears to have worked out okay.”
“Got me there,” Sax said agreeably.
Although he’d tried not to show it, anyone with eyes could’ve seen that Sax had fallen hard for the girl he had promised her boyfriend—and first husband—who’d taken off and joined the Marines, that he’d watch out for her. From what Lucas had been able to tell, he’d kept his word. And his feelings to himself.
“As for tapping into old feelings, sure, Maddy and I share a history going back a lot of years. And I still have feelings for that summertime girl. But I want to marry the woman she’s grown into.”
“Well, then, good luck with that. But I have just one more piece of brotherly advice to give you.”
“And that would be?”
“Kara wasn’t around that last summer, since she’d gone off to San Diego to marry Jared, but she and Maddy were close friends once. And since they’re out to lunch with Charity today, I assume they’ll slide right back into where they were when they left off.”
The way he and Sax had. “Yeah. I got that feeling last night when Kara came over at the barbecue and warned me not to hurt her.”
“That’s the deal. The woman I’m going to marry is now invested in the situation. Which means that if you screw up, she’s going to be really, really pissed.…
“Now, I seriously doubt she’d use that Glock she looks so damn sexy wearing to shoot you. But, since she instructed me to warn you that you’re toast if you hurt Maddy again, you’ve now dragged me into your damn drama.
“Which, in turn, means that if you fuck things up, it could come back on me.”
He folded his arms and gave Lucas that same, don’t-mess-with-the-big-bad-SEAL look Lucas had seen stop bad guys in their tracks. “If I end up sleeping on the couch because you make Maddy cry, I may shoot you.”
Even knowing that Sax wouldn’t risk that Leave It to Beaver life he seemed to have created with Kara and her son, Lucas wasn’t fool enough to argue the point.
“Roger that.”
29
Since it had been years since she’d had the local Dungeness crab, Madeline ordered the crab cakes served with a ginger plum sauce and a smooth beurre blanc. The French muscadet wine added a light and refreshing flavor to the buttery sauce, while the shallots added a tang, all of which paired perfectly with the crab.
Charity ordered a salad of char-grilled, citrus-glazed wild Alaskan salmon, romaine, field greens, and local hazelnuts finished with cranberry-lime relish and a citrus-shallot dressing. Kara went for the fish and chips, with the cod seasoned to perfection and fried in a light-as-air tempura batter.
Since they all shared bites, Madeline realized that if she was going to help Sofia open a restaurant in a town with food this great, she was definitely going to have to spend as much time on the menu as she would the building of the school and restaurant.
A scheduled afternoon spay had Charity rushing off and forgoing dessert, leaving Kara and Madeline alone at the table.
After a quick perusal of the dessert cart, which had Maddy thinking she’d probably gained ten pounds just looking at the display, they decided to split the white chocolate Grand Marnier cheesecake dipped in dark chocolate, with an Oreo crust.
“This is just like old times,” Kara said happily. “Even if we usually hung out at the Crab Shack or your grandmother’s house.”
“Simpler tastes, simpler times,” Maddy said.
“My tastes are still pretty simple, but I can recognize good food when I taste it.” She took a bite of cheesecake and studied Madeline for a long time. “So, since I know you have a meeting with Lucas this afternoon and I’ve never been much for playing games, I’m going to cut straight to the chase. He told me what he told you. About what he did back then with that waitress from the Stewed Clam.”
“Did you know about that then?”
“Not at the time. Since I was unmarried and pregnant, I was focused on my own problems. Plus, I left town right after graduation, so I missed all the fireworks. It must have been horrible, and I’m so sorry he hurt you. And that I wasn’t here to help.”
“As you said, you had your own problems to deal with. But yes, he hurt me. He broke my heart.”
“But you got over it.”
“Do you mean, did I allow myself to care for another man again? Yes, I did. And look how well that turned out.”
“You wouldn’t be the first woman to make a mistake and choose the wrong man.”
“True. And, unfortunately, I won’t be the last. But, although I did manage to move on with my life, whenever I’ve thought of Lucas over the years, I’ve always hated him with the heat of a thousand suns.”
“And now?”
“I want to,” Madeline admitted. “But not only does Gram seem to like him, and he’s admittedly being a big help with her new plan, it’s also proving hard to hate a guy whose dad just died. Especially since, other than those few holidays he’d spend with his mom in Colorado every year, his dad was essentially the only family he had left.”
“I can’t imagine how I’d react
if anything happened to Trey, so I’m trying not to judge Lucas’ mother. But having your mom desert what’s left of the family, after all that happened to them, had to leave scars.”
Kara sighed. “Anyway, I was thinking last night, watching Lucas behaving as if he’d just slid back into life here as a laid-back summer guy, that perhaps you’re not getting the entire picture of what he’s been through since you two broke up. And what he’s experienced that’s made him change.”
“Does he know you’re having this conversation?”
“I offered to speak to you,” Kara allowed. “But I didn’t tell him what, particularly, I’m going to share, because like so many vets, he’s been closemouthed about his war days. Which makes total sense, because SEAL missions are secret to begin with. But Sax had more problems than Lucas is displaying, so he did tell me some things that he gave me permission to share with you.”
Her somber tone had Madeline digging back into the cheesecake. “Are you sure we have enough chocolate for this discussion?”
“It’s not an easy one. But I’ve decided since Lucas seems to be serious about winning you back, it’s important. Because, as much as I care for him, I also wouldn’t want you entering into a relationship without knowing some background.”
“Which should be his to tell.”
“True.” It was Kara’s turn to take a big piece of the cake. “But put yourself in his place. If you were in love with someone and trying to convince them to give you a chance to show how right the two of you would be together, would you start out by sharing some of the darkest moments of your life with them?”
“Of course not. But eventually I would.”
“When you felt safer.”
“When I felt safer,” Madeline agreed, finding it a little surprising that for all his swagger, Lucas might not feel comfortable around her.
“It’s probably the smart thing to do. But here’s the thing: I was watching him joking and playing around with the dogs and Trey, Angel, and Johnny last night, and I came to the conclusion that he’s holding back because he doesn’t want his friends to worry about him.”