by Ashlee Price
“She’s working for some kind of kink club. Like fetishes and stuff.”
Many things came to mind when she told me that, but I could have almost guessed that I was wrong on all counts. There were so many things that could have been put into the kink category, and although I was trying to not seem like such a baby about it, I really didn’t want to know what all Sasha was doing. I loved my friend, and I didn’t like the idea of her doing something like that, even if she wanted to. She’d always been a little out there, but we all were in a way. That was why we were such good friends. We’d been through a lot together.
“As long as she’s happy.”
“She is. From the sound of it, I don’t think she’s ever been happier. She keeps inviting me down there, and then I started looking into jobs and it just all fell into place.”
“What are you going to do about, Charles?”
Kimmie took another shot, making less of a face this time. If they were anything like mine, her taste buds were long since gone.
“I don’t know. He can come or he can stay. I haven’t told him yet, but I’m going one way or another. I just can’t stay around here anymore, Mariah. It’s just a dead end. You should come with me. Then I wouldn’t have to go alone and you don’t have to be here without Sasha and me. Wouldn’t it be good if we could get the gang back together?”
“What about Kallie?”
“Kallie is in the wind right now. When I hear from her again, I’ll try to talk her into coming down. Come with me, Mariah, come on.”
It was tempting, and after a couple more shots and a little more talk, I felt like I had my next move made. I was going to New Orleans. It sounded like a good place to start over again. I knew that my mind might change when I sobered back up, but it really felt like it was the right thing to do. Nothing was ever going to happen in the small town of Coloma.
Chapter 2 – Mariah
“I don’t know what I was thinking. Maybe this is all a mistake.”
Kimmie just sighed and kept driving. She didn’t slow down or anything else. She knew that I was freaking out and the best thing to do was to let me just chill out. I would work myself up, much like I had now, and I was close to a panic attack minutes later. What was I doing? I couldn’t just move across the country to somewhere I didn’t know but a couple of people. I didn’t even have a job. Greg had made sure that I didn’t have any money in my own account, and my ATM card for our joint account had stopped working. That left me with less than a thousand dollars and no idea what I was going to do.
Everything was brighter around me and even the beating of my heart in my chest was loud enough to be unsettling. Everything about this day was unsettling, and the further south we got, the more nervous and doubtful I became. I didn’t want to do this.
“I’m serious, Kimmie. Drop me off at a bus station. I’m going back.”
“What are you going to go back to, Mariah? Your cop boyfriend who’s pushy and will start a fight if he doesn’t get his way? Or do you want to go back to the parents it took you years to get away from? Kallie and Sasha were right when they left Coloma. There’s nothing left for us there, and I’m ready to find something new.
She was right, of course. I didn’t have any reason to be there. I already missed Greg, but it was a pain that I knew would subside daily until he was but a faint memory in the back of my mind. That was how I knew I was going to be okay, but the unknown scared me and I had to wonder if it was better to stay with the devil I knew.
“Why do you have to say it like that?”
“Because you’re freaking out and you’re packed and there are a hundred miles behind us. It’s too late to freak out, Mariah.”
Kimmie knew me too well, but she was wrong about one thing. It wasn’t too late to freak out, not for me. It wasn’t convenient, and I wished I wasn’t like this. But I was, and now I wanted to back out. What would I do when I went back, though? She was right about there not really being anything for me there. I could get another job at one of the town’s couple of restaurants, or at a gas station, but there was nothing else in Coloma for me.
“I’m not trying to.”
“I know, Mariah. That’s why I’m not going to listen to you about it right now. I know this is the fear talking and soon you’ll see it differently.”
“You seem pretty sure.”
“You like the water and the sun. It’s already getting warmer, can’t you feel it?”
I could feel the temperature difference, but it wasn’t enough to make all of the nonsense in my head go away. “Yeah, but I don’t see why that matters.”
“Because it’s supposed to be seventy degrees today in New Orleans. It’s forty degrees right here. It’s going to start warming up, and then you’ll feel better. This doesn’t have to be forever. If we don’t like it we can leave and go back home.”
“You already have a job lined up. I don’t know what I’m going to do for money and a job.”
Kimmie shrugged it off like it wasn’t a big deal. “You’ll find something. Sasha says they are always hiring where she works.”
I gave my friend a look. I now knew what Sasha did for a living, and it wasn’t something that I really wanted to get involved in. She was far more liberal with her sexuality than I was. It was good money, I’d heard it a million times, but I didn’t want to go there. I didn’t even want to think about it.
“Yeah, I don’t know about that.”
Kimmie sighed and turned the radio back up. She wanted to end the conversation, and I welcomed the music loud enough to silence the thoughts in my head. It was just a trip with Kimmie. If I wanted to stay I could, but if not, I could always leave. That’s what I told myself to calm myself down a little bit. It didn’t have to be so dramatic. I just had to calm down. It was easier said than done, but I was working on it.
***
“Come on, Mariah, get up.”
“What, why?”
“Because we’re here.”
I opened my eyes. The sun was a lot brighter than I remembered. It felt like we’d been driving all day, and after hours in the car, my body was dying to unfold from its current position.
“Are you serious?”
I moved to get out of the car. I could tell that we were definitely not in Michigan anymore. It was a lot warmer, and I didn’t have to put on the jacket that I’d brought with me. The most amazing part of it, though, was the fact that it was February and instead of being cold, everything was green and it was warm and sunny outside.
“What do you think?”
Kimmie had gotten out and was next to me. I was looking at the house in front of us. It had a boat tied to the porch and a huge pond in the middle of the yard. The house was not too big, but the location didn’t leave anything to be desired. I could be happy here, I thought to myself. I don’t know why, but I did feel a bit of peace come over me. Maybe it was because of the place, or maybe it was because it wasn’t where I’d just come from. Either way, I was happy to be there, and I was more than a little glad that Kimmie hadn’t listened to me when I told her to drop me off.
“It’s so pretty here. I didn’t know it would be so different.”
Everything looked different. It wasn’t just the color of all of the plants, but the plants themselves were ones I hadn’t seen before. Everything from the trees to the bushes looked different.
“I know. Sasha sent me some pictures of this place and I’ve wanted to come down ever since.”
I didn’t blame her. I could see where the draw was. It really was a pretty place.
“So where is Sasha?”
“She’s at work. I guess she tried to get off early, but her boss is a bit of a prick, so she left the key under the mat and told us just to make ourselves at home. She will be home around two.”
“In the morning?”
Kimmie nodded and went to the trunk to get our bags. I grabbed mine and followed her to the door. The stairs up to the house were high, and it was only then I realized how far off
the ground it was. I made a comment to Kimmie, but she seemed to think that it was normal.
“It floods here a lot. That’s why there’s a boat.”
I looked around the yard and tried to figure how it would be with water covering everything. It was really hard to imagine. I couldn’t see it full of water like that, but Kimmie said it so matter-of-factly that I knew she wasn’t making it up.
The key was where it was supposed to be and she opened the door. It was just like Sasha, and I did feel right at home immediately. The furniture was dark and she’d even painted the walls black. Sasha had brought the darkness inside. I had to giggle at the skull lamps.
“This is where we’re staying?”
Kimmie shrugged, but I could see the wisp of a smile on her face. “It’s quaint. Did you expect it to be any different?”
“No, I just wouldn’t have thought she’d had the time to do all of this.”
“Sasha has been down here almost a year.”
“Really? Where the hell was I at?”
“With Greg. You didn’t have time for us when you two were together.”
I wanted to deny it, but I sort of had melted into him for a while. Bringing him up made me think of him again, and I could feel the sadness come over me. Well, it was either that or all the black in the room. Was this a mistake?
“I have time now. What do you want to do?”
“I don’t know. I have a couple of days until I start the job. I think we should just go out. We could go to that club that Sasha works at.”
The idea was enough to make me shiver. “If you want to go, I’m going to stay here. I don’t think I’m ready for all of that.”
“You don’t have to do anything, it’s just like a themed place.”
There was a picture of it in my head, but I wasn’t sure how accurate it was. I saw women in nothing but leather and people chained up on the walls. Maybe it wasn’t like that, but that was definitely not the first thing that I wanted to do in a new place.
“I know, it’s just…”
“You’re a little uptight, I know, but think about how happy she would be if we popped in to say hi.”
I thought that if she wanted us to come, she would have invited us out. She hadn’t, and I was unsure if that was the right surprise. If I did something like that for a living, I probably wouldn’t want my friends even knowing about it, let alone seeing me do it. It just seemed a bit too iffy to me to get behind.
“Let’s just wait. If it’s the type of place that we can just go in and visit, we’ll go out tomorrow once she clears it. I don’t want to get her in trouble with her job. You already said her boss is kind of a jerk.”
“Yeah, but she’s dating him, I think.”
I was getting really confused about the whos and whats, but going out did sound good.
“Okay, I’m not getting into all of that. Let’s just go to the French Quarter and do some dancing?”
Kimmie agreed and I relaxed. I felt like I’d really dodged a bullet there.
Chapter 3 – Mariah
“You’ll find something.”
Sasha was trying to give me a pep talk, but I was starting to think that she didn’t believe it either. “I found something, but it doesn’t pay enough. Everything is more expensive here.”
“Don’t worry about the rent. I told you that I got it.”
“I don’t want you to have to get it. I’ll find something.”
Sasha smiled and pushed her black, braided locks back from her face. “I told you that. I know you will. New Orleans is full of things to do for a pretty woman like you.”
The look on my face had her smiling. “There’s always a job open at the club.”
I didn’t want to offend her, but there was very little chance I was going to work for the Fetish Club. I’d been there once a couple of weeks back and I was still wondering whether it was even legal. The fact that there were two uniformed police officers in there showed it was at least tolerated – but legal? I had my doubts.
“Not really my scene.”
Sasha just smiled. “Elie saw you when you came in, said you would make a killing there.”
“What does that mean?” I wanted to know what kind of money she was talking about. I wasn’t interested, just curious.
“A couple grand a night.”
“For doing what?” That was the most important question. I hadn’t gotten into it with Sasha before, partly because I thought she or me would be embarrassed by it. But there were a lot of side rooms in the dark club, and I had to wonder what went on there.
“Whatever you’re comfortable doing.”
She was being a little ambiguous, but if she hadn’t brought it up, I wouldn’t have pushed. “What does that mean exactly?”
Sasha got up and pushed back the braids that kept falling in her face as she bent down to get her laptop off the desk. “Do you really want to know?”
I nodded that I did, and after a couple of minutes, Sasha turned the computer around. I tried to gauge my reaction. What was I supposed to say to this?
“Wow, that’s you.”
She’d brought the computer to a website that had the logo for the club on the top. There were rows of names, and under Sasha’s name there was a whole profile. It looked very polished and well done – but then there was the content that was being displayed. This wasn’t just normal information. It listed what she would do. Some things were sexual and other things were humiliating and a little painful. It was not at all what I had in mind. I stared at the screen for several minutes before I remembered that I had to breathe again.
Sasha closed up the computer and we sat in silence for a while. I didn’t know what to say, even though in my head I wanted to say something so it wouldn’t be so awkward. But all I could think was, what the hell do I say? I’d learned more about one of my best friends in two minutes online than I had in years.
“Just because it’s on there doesn’t mean that I’ll actually do it, but Elie wants the guys to feel like there’s a choice. It also makes me look naughtier.”
I just nodded along. I was still in shock. Maybe Kimmie was right and I was a prude, because I just didn’t get that.
“So you’re okay with this website?”
She shrugged again like it was nothing. I wished she would really look at me. Was that really okay with her?
“I don’t know, I guess. I don’t like having my face out like that, but I make a very good living, and the way I’m saving, it won’t be long until I can open up a little boutique and make some clothes. You know that’s what I want. This is just a way for me to get it.”
I could see her point, especially if she was making as much as she said she did. “Do you like it?”
Sasha looked away, but I could tell from her brown eyes that she was going to tell me the truth. “Not most of the time, not really. I do what I’m comfortable doing, but it isn’t always what I want to do. Then again, neither is being a waitress for a couple of dollars an hour. At least this way I don’t have to work as much and I’ll get what I want sooner. It makes it worth it.”
It wasn’t the answer I’d expected. She told me that she did have some regulars that she liked, but by and large she seemed unhappy. I hated to see my friend have to go to such lengths to make a living. Was that really what I had to look forward to if I stayed?
“I couldn’t do anything like that. I’m still waiting for the one.”
Sasha knew that and told me that she’d told Elie that. The fact that anyone knew was a little grating, but a man like that, who owned a place like that? I didn’t like that idea at all.
“You told him?”
“Yeah, it’s not a big deal. He just wanted to know a little about you and that came up.”
I supposed that in a conversation with a man like that, in a place like that, it would come up. Another reality check that I could never do something like that. I could never be so free about sex and everything else around it.
“Oh.”
“Fee?”
“Yeah, I pay him to work there, to use the building and the back rooms. He sets up the clients with my specifications and then I pay him every night I’m there. It’s a lot, but it’s worth it because I don’t have to deal with anything. Any problems, Elie takes care of it.”
“So you work for him, but pay him to work there?” I felt like my mind was being blown.
“Yeah, it sounds strange when you say it like that.”
“Uh huh.”
“You just have to know how it works.”
I still didn’t get it, but after an hour and a few drinks, Sasha had explained it all to me. I’m not sure when I started to think about it as a last resort option, but that’s what it started to seem like to me. I was going to keep looking for something else, but the club was now in the back of my mind. If I ever needed to make some real money fast, I would know where to go. I didn’t think I would ever have to, but somewhere during that conversation it became a possibility.
***
“Mariah, you need to make sure that you get all of the grease out of there.”
I looked down into the fryer and felt my stomach churning. It was my third day at the best job I’d been able to find in the last month and I was already thinking to myself how much I hated it. The pimple-faced manager who wasn’t but a year older than me didn’t help at all. He was already on me all of the time and I hadn’t been at the restaurant a week.
“Yes, sir. I’ll do it again.”
I didn’t mention that it was the second time I’d done it already and I didn’t see the point of getting all of the grease out when I was going to put more in. This was what I had to do for $7.25 an hour, and as I got the machine drained for the third time, I thought about what Sasha had said. I certainly didn’t like the job that I was in now. I was still looking, sure, but what if this was it? I could go back home and live there for half the cost and never have to do this kind of job. It was even worse than the two days I’d spent shucking oysters last week.