Super Fly vs. Furious Flea!

by Todd H. Doodler

  The Super Fly series

  The World’s Smallest Superhero!

  Revenge of the Roach!

  Super Fly vs. Furious Flea!

  Rise of the Evil Army!

  (coming soon)

  To my favorite little fly on the wall, Elle

  1. A Fly and His Pie

  2. It’s a Wonderful Life

  3. Home Alone

  4. Walking Tall

  5. About Fiona

  6. Thelma and Louise

  7. Furious Flea

  8. Lucy Kaboosie Tries to Make a Trucie

  9. The Coolest Bug in School

  10. The Dark Side of the Diaper

  11. Flies Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

  12. Good Bugs Gone Bad

  13. Rock ’Em, Sock ’Em

  14. Super Fleas

  15. Fly vs. Flea

  16. Fearless or Fabulous?

  A Fly and His Pie

  Brown Barge Elementary School floated inside a broken toilet at the center of Stinkopolis’s city dump. It was the only all-bug school of its kind in the area. Classes began in September, at the end of the busy pollinating, stinging, and sweat-licking season known to humans as summer. School ended with the first frost, when most of Stinkopolis hibernated or flew south.

  Amazingly, just a few short weeks after his first miserable day at Brown Barge, fourth grader Eugene Flystein found himself being named Student of the Season for all his hard work, and for saving the whole school from turning into zombies. Of course, they didn’t realize that it wasn’t Eugene who had saved them.

  If you recall, in six seconds Eugene became 9,000 times smarter—and stronger, faster, and just plain super! Becoming Super Fly was the power of Eugene’s greatest invention to date: the patented piece of key lime pie called the Ultimo 6-9000.

  Don’t bother looking for it in the local bakery, your favorite restaurant, or the grocery store. Not even the Internet offers real live superhero supplies (yet). The remains of that powerful pastry can only be found in one place—the Flysteins’ fridge.

  Before the first day of school, Eugene had no idea if the Ultimo 6-9000—disguised as a delicious piece of pie— would work. Then again, most of his inventions didn’t work. That was the really annoying thing about being an inventor.

  But within six seconds, Eugene felt a surge of energy, a burst of awesomeness, and an explosion of power! Before eating the pie, Eugene had been an ordinary fly. Actually, a pretty clumsy, nonathletic, and nerdy specimen. Okay, he was a fly who could barely fly!

  Then suddenly Eugene could fly to the moon and back in less time than it used to take him to get from the Flystein home to the Poopermarket! On that day, Eugene became Super Fly, the tiny superhero who saved Stinkopolis and the rest of the world from Crazy Cockroach!

  When Eugene’s adoring little sister, Elle, later helped herself to some of that patented pie, she became 9,000 times better in just six seconds too. (Seriously, it’s totally patented, so don’t even think about trying to duplicate the formula.)

  With the addition of a fly costume (pun intended) and a nifty name, the second grader began her career as the stylish superhero known as Fly Girl.

  Eugene expected his pest friend, Fred Flea, to try the pie. But on that fateful first day of school Fred refused to taste the tart, lime-flavored dessert of destiny. Instead, he opted to remain only as “fantastic” as his natural flea physique and the training for the family circus made him.

  Fred preferred to be Super Fly’s sidekick, Fantastic Flea. Even without superpowers, Fred played a crucial part in Super Fly’s ongoing battles against Crazy Cockroach. It was David vs. Goliath. Good vs. evil. Fly and Flea vs. Roach.

  The evil cockroach had also been enhanced 9,000 times by the super snack. To most of Brown Barge Elementary, he was known only as that annoying bully Cornelius C. Roach.

  Students knew Cornelius stole their lunch money, tripped them in the halls, and pulled their wings or antennae until they begged for mercy. But they had no idea that in his secret identity he’d once nearly taken over the world with a robot army, and then again with a hideously hypnotic video game.

  Nor did those innocent insects know that the fate of Stinkopolis, and every other place on earth, had recently been decided by a Ping-Pong match between the ruthless super villain and the Super Fly who invented that super pie.

  The match took place in the villain’s luxurious lair, located in one side of a dirty diaper. The other side housed the headquarters of the heroes: Super Fly, Fly Girl, and their loyal, leaping sidekick, Fantastic Flea. The heroes’ side of the diaper didn’t even have a mini refrigerator or a big-screen TV, much less a Ping-Pong table. (Kind of a sore point with all of them.)

  The match between the super roach and mega fly didn’t last long. The Ping-Pong ball flew faster than a runaway comet! When the wind died down, Super Fly was victorious.

  If the villain had honored his promise, the conflict for full possession of the dirty diaper and for peace on earth would’ve ended then and there. But villains never keep promises, especially when they have their fingers crossed and swear to have their revenge and never stop trying to take over the world. And that’s exactly what Crazy Cockroach did!

  It’s a Wonderful Life

  Being named Student of the Season meant a lot to Eugene Flystein, and especially to his parents and sister, who couldn’t have been prouder. Remember, his exploits as Super Fly were secret, and he didn’t exactly have a zillion sports trophies on his shelves. Nerdy, eyeglasses-wearing Eugene had books instead. Oh, and one spelling bee second-place ribbon from when he lost to Belinda Bee. (It’s pretty hard to beat a bee in a spelling bee contest.)

  Eugene framed the page of the Stinkopolis Grimes reporting on the award. He hung it on the cottony-soft absorbent wall in the Fortress of Doody (the heroes’ side of the diaper). Eugene liked the caption: Brown Barge Elementary School’s Super Student, Eugene Flystein.

  He always chuckled to himself, thinking, “If the rest of Stinkopolis only knew how super I really am!”

  Of course, for the safety of the Flystein family and friends like Fred Flea, Eugene never revealed his superpowers in public. Still, being Student of the Season was almost as good.

  Everybug seemed to know him—even teachers and sixth graders. Girl bugs, like the lovely Lucy Kaboosie, suddenly noticed Eugene more. Did the sun shine brighter? Did the poo-poo platter actually taste even poo-ier?

  Maybe everything was the same, but Eugene felt different. He felt like a Big Bug on Campus, a cool dude, an insect of respect.

  When Eugene strutted down the halls of Brown Barge Elementary, everybug waved a leg or wing or at least tipped an antenna.

  Fred Flea was impressed. “Wow! That was the captain of the bugball team!”

  Eugene shrugged. If he dared to use his powers in public he would win every sport!

  “Hi, Eugene!” Lucy Kaboosie fluttered her spotted wing covers.

  Eugene thought she was the most beautiful ladybug he’d ever seen. He pushed up his eyeglasses and blinked at the vision of Lucy waving above her books. “Um . . . yeah . . . hi! Hi, Lucy!” Apparently being super was no help when it came to talking to pretty girls.

  Just then a Ping-Pong ball sailed in front of Eugene’s face. The fly turned to see two sixth graders tapping a ball between paddles as they walked down the hall.

  Fred shook his head. “This is getting ridiculous!”

  The flea was right. Every bug at Brown Barge had gone Ping-Pong crazy! By beating Crazy Cockroach, Super Fly had created a Ping-Pong epidemic! Every flat surface was turned into a Ping-Pong table. Desks, counters, even the backs of some of the bigger beetles.

  The halls echoed with the rhythmic pa-pi
ng, pa-pong of the small white balls bouncing and flying, landing and rolling.

  Eugene loved the game. But even he agreed with Fred. “Playing in the halls is a bit much.”

  As he spoke another ball zipped right past Eugene’s wings to slap Fred in the face! The student who swatted the ball quickly apologized. “Eugene Flystein! So sorry! I didn’t mean to hit you.”

  “No harm,” Eugene said.

  “Some harm!” Fred protested, rubbing his sore face.

  But no one noticed. Fred slumped miserably. Something was different. The Student of the Season wasn’t interested in Fred anymore. Eugene never wanted to hang out and play video games, like he felt too important for his own pest friend.

  Fred wanted to ask Elle about this. But the second grader had become something of a Big Bug on Campus herself.

  After all, her only brother had been named Student of the Season. And even though Elle’s superpowers were also a carefully guarded secret, being 9,000 times faster, stronger, and smarter had given the girl a megadose of self-confidence.

  Fred told himself, “I should be happy for my friends.” But he didn’t feel happy. Fred felt as useless as a dented Ping-Pong ball.

  Home Alone

  Unlike his pest friend, Eugene felt more important than ever. The Student of the Season had been chosen president of the Math Club, the Science Club, the Geology Club, the Waste Management Club, and the Cooking with Poo Club. If no one was looking, Eugene sometimes resorted to flying at super speed between club meetings. Just to keep his superpowers from getting rusty.

  Fred was busy after school too. Lately he’d been spending more time training with his family. Fred hoped to learn enough flea circus tricks to join the family business one day.

  It was fine that the two bug buddies were pursuing separate interests. But it didn’t exactly feel like they were pest friends anymore.

  That’s why Fred was so excited a few days later on the bus ride home when Eugene suggested, “Let’s play Sewer Invaders today.”

  Fred grinned. “Sounds great! We can pig out on junk food and see if we can make it past level two.”

  Eugene smiled back. “Yeah, it’s about time we took on those albino alligators.”

  Fred added, “Mom just bought a big box of those new bite-size scabs.”

  Eugene rubbed his stomach eagerly. “Your house it is! I’ll get there around four.”

  “See you then!” Fred agreed as the friends got off the bus. Then, after a quick high-flyve tap with Eugene and a cheery wave to Elle, the athletic flea happily leaped toward his home on Compost Drive.

  Fred rushed through his homework and chores. He wanted to be ready for Eugene’s arrival.

  Fred took the big box of snack-size scabs out of the pantry. He looked at the clock. It was only a quarter to four. He was anxious for Eugene to arrive. It’d been a while since they shared some quality bug time together.

  Fred felt tempted to open the box and taste one of the “new!” “improved!” “now with more pus!” scabs. But he decided to wait for Eugene, maybe even until after their first game. This was going to be awesome!

  Fred watched seconds tick by on the Flea family clock. He tried doing math in his head like Eugene. Sixty seconds in a minute. Fifteen minutes till four o’clock . . .

  Fred’s brain rebelled. He’d already done his homework. This was fun time!

  Fred practiced somersaults. So as the clock slowly tick-tocked, Fred leaped and twirled, spun and jumped.

  Meanwhile, in the Flystein kitchen, Elle and several of her little friends were playing board games.

  “Don’t you want to play Shoots and Sewers too?” asked little Penny Pillbug.

  Eugene chuckled warmly. “Thanks anyway. But I’m too busy for games.”

  Elle stared at Eugene. “Weren’t you going to play video games with Fred today?”

  Eugene glanced at the clock. He could still make it to Fred’s (especially if no one was looking and he could fly at super speed). But Eugene was making some real progress on the equations for the next math team practice and he wanted to wait for the results on this latest tweak to that elusive invisibility formula . . .

  Eugene realized that Elle was still staring at him. He murmured, “Kinda busy. Fred’ll understand.”

  Elle felt troubled. Eugene was usually so thoughtful. Didn’t he realize Fred was waiting for him? Didn’t Eugene care?

  Her brother accepted a plate of moldy cheese Poopritos offered by one of Elle’s other friends. “Thank you!”

  The tiny moth burst into giggles. Her fuzzy antennae jiggled with excitement.

  Elle started to ask, “Shouldn’t you at least call Fred?”

  But Eugene was already walking back to his room.

  Eugene had been so quick to say, “Fred will understand.” But would he? Elle didn’t! This was no way for her kind, sweet brother to treat anybug, much less his pest friend.

  Back at the Flea home, Fred heard the doorbell ring. He rushed the landing on his triple somersault and nearly bit his own foot!

  “I’ll be right there!” Fred shouted as he raced to the door.

  Fred flung it open, expecting Eugene. Instead, a burly moving beetle announced, “Delivery for 24 Compost Drive.”

  Disappointment washed over Fred. “That’s across the street,” he told the beetle.

  House number 24 had been empty ever since the Silverfish family had moved to an apartment in nearby Draintown Abbey.

  “Thanks, kid,” the gruff beetle grumbled, hurrying to tell his crew their mistake.

  Fred looked across the street at the empty house. He wondered who his new neighbors were. Did they have any school-age pupae, maybe even someone in fourth grade?

  Fred wanted to share this enormous news with Eugene. Where was he? Fred looked at the clock. It was almost six!

  Suddenly, he felt worried. What if Crazy Cockroach had attacked Super Fly? After all, the villain had sworn revenge and demanded a Ping-Pong rematch! Perhaps poor Eugene had been jumped on his way to Compost Drive?

  Picking up the phone, Fred frantically dialed the Flysteins’ number.

  Walking Tall

  After only one ring, Elle answered.

  Fred asked, “Is Eugene there?”

  Elle didn’t say, “Oh no! He left for your house two hours ago!”

  She simply shouted, “Eugene! Fred’s on the phone.”

  After a few minutes, Fred heard his friend’s voice. “Oh, hi, Fred.”

  Eugene sounded distracted.

  “What’s going on?” Fred asked.

  “Just working. I might actually have solved part of the invisibility problem,” Eugene began. “It’s not that the particles aren’t stable; it’s the mixture . . .”

  Fred felt a rush of anger—and hunger. “Do you know what time it is?”

  Eugene restricted his clock-watching to the classroom. When he worked on his inventions, time didn’t exist.

  Fred answered for him. “It’s almost six.”

  Fred’s stomach growled. Soon it would be suppertime—and he hadn’t even eaten his after-school snack.

  It would serve Eugene right if Fred ate all the snack-size scabs. But he suddenly felt more sad than hungry.

  “You . . . were just inventing stuff?” Fred stammered. “You’re always inventing stuff. Why didn’t you at least ask me to help?”

  Eugene usually loved showing off his inventions to Fred. Sometimes just by looking at them and asking questions Fred helped Eugene solve a pesky problem.

  Eugene didn’t notice Fred’s distress. He simply felt eager to get back to work. “Yeah. I’m sorry I forgot about going to your house today. We should totally do that another time.”

  Fred didn’t bother answering. He didn’t even say good-bye. He just hung up!

  Eugene shrugged and returned to his room.

  Fred was angry! He jumped so high and so fast that he bounced off the ceiling and ricocheted off the walls before he finally landed in the middle of the living room.


  “I don’t need friends who don’t appreciate me,” Fred fumed. “I can go it alone. Who needs any other bugs? Not me! I’m an independent parasite. I’ll just focus on being the best flea I can be.”

  Fred flipped over and over, executing a perfect landing before raising two legs in the air like a gymnast in the Bug Olympics.

  “I’ll be awesome!” Fred told himself. “I don’t need to ride on anyone else’s wings. I’m my own bug.”

  Talking out loud made Fred feel even lonelier. So he added defiantly, “Who needs enemies when you have friends like Eugene?” Then he muttered, “So what if he is Super Fly? I’m Fantastic Flea, and that’s a pretty big deal too!”

  Fred squared his shoulders and stood up straighter. “I’m nobody’s sidekick anymore. I may be just a flea, but I’m walking tall from now on.”

  After dinner, instead of relaxing in front of the TV, Fred decided to do more practicing. He asked his father to spot him as he tried some of the family’s more difficult tricks.

  Mr. Flea applauded. “You’re really taking it to the next level.”

  Fred took an extra-deep bow. Every muscle ached with fatigue. But Fred was smiling. He felt determined to be the best flea in the world!

  The next day, Fred acted as if Eugene Flystein didn’t exist. Instead of chatting on the bus, Fred sat in the back and buried his face in a book.

  He heard Eugene’s friendly “Hello.” Fred just didn’t respond. He even ignored Elle.