by Kait Nolan
A hot, prickly ball of emotion lodged in her throat. “I made a mistake. I thought we could be something more than a fling. That our differences wouldn’t matter. But I knew better. I knew better, and I rushed headlong into things and now it’s over.” Her shoulders shook as the tears spilled over.
Norah held on, stroking her back. “I don’t understand. Why is it over?”
Miranda sniffed and scrubbed at her cheeks. “I made a choice between my feelings and my principles. My principles won.” And she didn’t regret that. If Ethan couldn’t respect something so fundamental about her, they hadn’t ever stood a chance.
“You’re going to have to explain that one.”
“He thinks Delaney is the one behind all the vandalism and harassment.”
“Seriously? Why?”
Miranda told her what had happened, laying out the evidence as he’d presented it to her. When she’d finished, Norah looked thoughtful.
Miranda scowled. “Don’t you dare tell me you agree with him.”
“No. I don’t think she’d do anything against you. You’ve been one of her greatest champions. But I can see why he’d think as he does. He’s still an outsider here. But how did that lead to y’all breaking up?”
“Because he said I was being stupid for not believing what was in front of my face, and I kicked him out.”
Norah winced. “He actually said that?”
“Loud and clear.” Shaking her head in disgust, Miranda forked up another bite of pie. She’d be sick as a dog tomorrow from all this sugar, but who the hell cared? She felt sick anyway. At least she’d found her mad again. That was far preferable to the tears. “I knew he wasn’t an idealist. I knew he had a dim view of humanity because of his job. But he at least seemed to respect my viewpoint, which was more than Stephen ever did. But he was clearly just humoring me.”
“It sounds more like he was frustrated with you.”
“Yeah. Stephen was frustrated with me, too. Every damn day. And all those little digs ate away at me. Made me doubt myself. I’m never, ever going there again.” She stabbed the pie and left her fork in it, vibrating with the same frustration coursing through her body.
Norah quietly plucked the fork from the pie and nudged it out of reach. “Sweetie, just because the two of you disagree on this doesn’t mean he’s like Stephen. He cares about you—that’s more than obvious to anyone with eyes—and he’s worried about something that’s a clear threat to your safety. From his point of view, the evidence points to Delaney.”
Miranda crossed her arms. “The evidence is wrong. Or incomplete. Or something. It’s not Delaney.”
“I’m not saying it is. But if he believes it is, and you’re allowing her to stay close, to his mind that’s a potential danger to you. That’s got to be a little crazy-making for him, so maybe he spoke out of turn.”
It made a kind of sense. God knew, she understood what it was to say things in the heat of the moment that you came to regret. But Miranda wasn’t in a place where she wanted sense. She wasn’t ready to let go of her anger because once it was gone, she’d be left with nothing but the grief. “Why are you defending him?”
Norah reached out to curl her hands around Miranda’s upper arms. “Because, honey, you’re in love with him, and I don’t want to see you throw this away because you lost your temper.”
She hissed in a breath, but Norah rolled on. “I’m not saying you’re wrong to defend Delaney. I don’t believe she’s behind this any more than you do. But I think Ethan just wants to protect you. He’s not Stephen. He’s so much a better man than that.”
Miranda pressed her lips together as a fresh knot of tears replaced the fury she’d been riding for hours. “I want to believe that. Before the last couple of days, things were great between us. And then everything just went to shit. We hit maximum stress level and we just…broke.”
“It happens. It happened to me and Cam. But it doesn’t have to stay that way.”
“Are you suggesting I’m the one who owes him an apology?” Because hell would freeze over first. She wasn’t wrong.
“You two are great together. He’s made you happier than I’ve ever seen you. I’m saying y’all’s relationship deserves a legitimate conversation, not just a fight when you’re both tired and pissed off.”
“That’s certainly my vote.”
Though she jolted, Miranda didn’t turn toward the sound of Ethan’s voice. Not until she could get herself under control. “What are you doing here?”
“I came looking for you. You shouldn’t be here with the door unlocked.”
Miranda whipped around, but before she could go off again, Norah jumped in.
“That’s my fault. I left it unlocked when I took the last load of garbage out.”
Ethan set a styrofoam box on the counter beside the pie, not even showing a flicker of surprise that a third of it was gone. His face was drawn, the lines around his eyes and mouth more pronounced. He probably still hadn’t slept yet.
She was still furious with him. But a part of her was so glad he’d shown up, that he wasn’t willing to leave things where they were. Because maybe Norah was right. Maybe they didn’t have to stay broken.
“What’s that?” Had he brought her some kind of peace offering?
“My dinner. See, I was under the impression that this afternoon was a fight, and we’d circle back around to discussing things when we were calmer. Then Mama Pearl mentioned how you’d been in for a breakup pie, and Clay informed me that if you’d actually lost your temper with me, I was all kinds of up shit creek, so I figured I’d best come deal with that before things got any more out of hand.”
Norah made a sound that might’ve been a laugh, but she wisely turned it into a cough. “I’m just gonna leave you two to talk.”
Miranda didn’t try to stop her. One way or the other, she wanted this resolved tonight.
Miranda watched him with shuttered eyes as Norah made her escape. Ethan missed the usual open humor, but he understood she was pissed. More than pissed, she was hurt. He could see she’d been crying, and the idea of that gutted him. But it also gave him hope that maybe not all was lost.
The door shut behind Norah and they were alone with all the temper and hurt feelings and take out. “Look, can we sit and talk? Really talk? I’d say we can do it right here, but I’m not gonna lie to you—I’m exhausted. I’ve been up for two days, and I really don’t want to face plant into what’s left of that pie.”
The corner of her mouth twitched, as if she’d started to smile, then stopped herself. Without a word, she scooped up the pie and headed down the hall to the break room.
Ethan grabbed his own food and followed, glancing around at the progress. “You’ve gotten a lot done.”
“Rage cleaning is very efficient.”
“Certainly more productive than a lot of the alternatives.” If he’d had the time—and the actual energy—he’d have been going several rounds at Blanchard’s Gym in the boxing ring. “Are you planning on opening tomorrow?”
“By afternoon, if we can. My staff will be here in the morning to finish the reorganization and sterilization. I needed to do this part myself.” She dropped into a chair and set the pie on the table.
Ethan sat beside her. “Taking control of a situation where you’ve had none.”
She nodded and forked up a bite of pie. “You wanted to talk, talk.”
Straight to it then. After a moment’s hesitation, he turned off his radio. For the next little bit, he wanted to focus on nothing but Miranda.
“You said something earlier that’s been gnawing at me all day. That you’d been in a relationship where your beliefs were belittled. That you couldn’t share your life with someone who makes you feel like less. It kills me that I said or did anything that made you feel like that. The last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you. I was frustrated and worried, and I just don’t see the situation the way you do. I have no problem with your idealism.” Her expression hardened and he r
ealized he’d said the wrong thing yet again. “But I felt like you weren’t willing to take necessary precautions for your safety, and that makes me nuts. And I made just about the worst possible choice in words to press my point.”
He leaned forward, staring into those hazel eyes and willing her to believe him. To let him in. She didn’t back away, but she didn’t lean toward him either.
“You’re not stupid. I would never think of you as stupid, ever. You’re smart and compassionate and beautiful, and one of the bravest people I’ve ever known. It takes guts to believe in people. To put yourself out there knowing you might not get anything back. You do that every day because you don’t know any other way to be. I don’t have that kind of courage. I’ve let my experiences define me. I’ve let them limit me. And I tried to use them to limit you. I won’t apologize for trying to protect you, but I will apologize for how I did it.”
Miranda stared at him for a long moment, eyes still glistening—shit, he didn’t want to make her cry again—before she set the fork aside and laced her fingers together. “I appreciate that. I do. I certainly never got anything close to an apology from Stephen. But this isn’t just about me and my sensitivity to being called stupid. It’s about a fundamental difference in how we see the world. A difference that’s led to you making accusations that could absolutely destroy the life of someone I care about.”
“I was wrong. It’s not Delaney.”
That set her back in her chair. Her eyes narrowed. “What changed from this afternoon?”
“You ever heard her mention Sean Murphy?”
Miranda frowned. “The firefighter?”
“Yeah.”
“I’ve heard his name somewhere recently. I mean besides when he was at my house.” She snapped her fingers. “He went to the dance with Charlotte Ballard. We were talking about it just before you got to the community center for set up. And Delaney was upset when she heard it and left right after. I didn’t connect the two because I didn’t know who he was at the time.”
Ethan blew out a breath. “Mama Pearl says Delaney’s got a thing for him. I’d say that confirms it. He was also in my bowhunter safety class.”
Miranda crossed her arms with an unmistakable air of I-told-you-so. “So you’re dropping her as a suspect?”
“She had a prior history, opportunity, and motive. But I was wrong about the motive, so I have to look elsewhere, because I am a good cop.”
Her eyes dropped and she grimaced. “I’m sorry. I should never have said that. You put as much into your job as I do, and it wasn’t fair of me to lash out because I was angry at how you were focused on my friend.”
Ethan waved that off. “The point is, she’s no longer a suspect, and I’m not going to make trouble for her. And that means I am officially back to square one with this investigation.”
Her breath gushed out. “Thank God. I mean, not thank God, but you know what I mean.”
“That’s about all I know.” Ethan ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t presently have any other viable suspects.” And it was lowering to admit that. Not that he hadn’t had cases that took weeks or months—years even. But none of them had been personal.
“You don’t think this has anything to do with that string of robberies in Lawley?”
“I can’t rule it out conclusively, but you were being targeted already, and none of the other vandalism fits with the robberies. Judd doesn’t think this was his guy. Clay theorized that it might not be about you at all but somebody trying to get at me through you.”
Her brows drew together. “I don’t understand. How does targeting me attack you?”
How could she not understand what she meant to him? “If the answer to that doesn’t immediately occur to you, then I’ve done a shitty job of showing it.” Leaning toward her, he braced his arms on his knees. “I’m in love with you.”
All trace of combativeness melted from her expression. “Ethan.”
He took a chance and grasped her hands. “Look, I know I’m not perfect. I know I’ve been overbearing and overprotective. I know we’ve butted heads. But I never expected to be here again. After my marriage imploded, I never thought anybody would tempt me enough to take the leap into love again. You did. Almost from the first time I saw you. And I don’t want what’s between us to be over.”
The hands in his tightened, and hope leapt in his chest.
“Neither do I.”
The knot that had been lodged beneath his heart the last several hours finally unclenched. They’d survive this, and they’d be stronger. But he wanted to make sure there was no room for misunderstandings. “So you’ll give me another chance?”
“I’ll give us another chance. Because I’m in love with you, too.”
Just like that, his world tipped back into proper alignment. There were a hundred questions he didn’t know the answer to, but right here, in this moment, he knew she loved him, and that was the only thing that mattered.
Ethan slid his hand around her nape and drew her mouth just a breath away from his. “I’ll make sure you don’t regret it.”
When he tugged, she flowed into his lap without resistance, wrapping her arms and legs around him as if she wanted to eradicate all the emotional distance they’d endured. Ethan could absolutely get behind that idea. He took her mouth and drank in the taste of her, as if they’d been apart for years instead of hours. A fresh urgency began to beat in his blood. She wiggled, putting just enough space between them that she could reach the buttons of his shirt.
“Wait just a sec,” he gasped. With quick, efficient fingers, he unhooked the radio mic from his shirt and removed his duty belt.
She went back to work, stripping him out of the shirt and the vest, as he tugged her sweatshirt up and off. He yanked off his undershirt as her hands fought with his belt, his zipper. He freed her breasts from the plain cotton bra. Then she had her hands around the length of him and he dropped his head back on a curse.
“Got a logistical problem here,” he rasped.
Miranda glanced down at her yoga pants, then back up at him. “Counter.”
He didn’t need to be told twice. Gripping her thighs, he surged to his feet and carried her the short distance to the break room counter. Almost as soon as her butt hit the surface, he was reaching for her waistband, dragging down the pants and her underwear. For half a second, he tried to slow down, to find some measure of control.
But she reached for him. “Now. Hurry.”
Bracing his hands on the counter, Ethan slid inside her. As her body closed around him, he groaned out her name. She wrapped those long, long legs around his waist, digging her heels into his ass to pull him even deeper.
“Ethan.” She pressed her brow to his, skimming her hands over his shoulders.
For a long moment, they held there, all the distance gone. Then she kissed him again, and he began to move. Past the doubt, past the hurt, chasing the heat that built between them, until there was nothing left but need. He took her screaming over the edge and emptied himself.
She trembled in his arms, pressed her lips to the thundering pulse in his throat. His own legs shook, but nothing on Earth could’ve gotten him to move just yet. For the first time in a long time, he felt whole. As if she’d filled all the empty places inside him. Burying his face in her hair, he tightened his arms around her. “I love you.”
She stroked his nape. “I love you, too. And I really want you to take me home so we can do that all over again in a bed.”
It turned out he could make himself move if properly motivated.
They dressed and set the room to rights. She cleaned the countertops and put the rest of the pie into the fridge. As they stepped into the hall, she paused and peered at the door.
“What are you doing?”
“Checking to see if this door really does have a lock.” Her dimples winked. “We might need it again someday.”
Ethan found himself grinning. “Legs, I like the way you think.”
Chapt
er 20
“I’d like to get my hands on whatever asshole did this.”
Miranda felt the same way, but also about a million times lighter than she had during her rage cleaning the night before. She swung an arm around Piper’s shoulders, giving her a squeeze. “I appreciate you taking time away from the baby to come help sort things out.”
“It’s fine. Myles is working from home and pacing his office wearing her in the sling. He’s under the impression he’s already training her for journalistic greatness, and it’s the cutest thing ever. As I have zero plans to give her a brother or sister any time soon, my ovaries needed a break. So what’s the plan here?”
“Patient rooms and sterilization are priority. I did the drug inventory last night, so that’s taken care of, but we still need to finish reorganizing and inventorying the other supplies, and deal with the nightmare that is the files.” Before Ethan had arrived last night, she’d scooped them all into boxes for sorting.
Shelby cracked her knuckles. “I’d like a half an hour alone with the asshole and your surgical instruments.”
Ethan straightened from his position against the wall. For once her staff hadn’t commented on her police escort to work. “I assure you, I’m doing everything I can to find out who’s behind this. With that in mind, I’ll be talking to each of you individually this morning. Delaney, I’d like to start with you, if you don’t mind. Miranda, you too.”
Delaney’s cheeks paled, but she didn’t argue. The poor girl already had reason to be nervous around cops. Ethan’s accusations hadn’t helped.
Miranda couldn’t resist slipping an arm around her. “It’ll be fine.”
Because it was one of the few rooms that didn’t need touching, they retreated to the break room and shut the door.
“Have a seat.” Ethan gestured toward a chair, an air of polite expectation on his face.
Reluctance in every line of her body, Delaney sank into one of the other chairs. Ethan and Miranda took two of the others.
It took everything Miranda had not to look at the counter. Less than twenty-four hours ago, she’d sat there, bare-assed, with Ethan buried inside her. Her body heated at the memory and her cheeks flushed.