I raised my arms, dancing with my sisters as they surrounded me with their friends. We hadn’t had a moment together like this in a long time. We hadn’t, and I never wanted it to end.
The song ended too soon, but Radha’s hands came out again, holding mine and making me move with her. I did, dancing and Cassidy clapped alongside us, throwing her own arms up on occasion. We danced two more songs that way, all fast, but then the DJ surprised us. He let me down with a slow song.
The guys seemed to come out of nowhere, asking Radha’s friends to dance. Radha had a partner, too, and Cassidy got one next.
Feeling I should, I went to walk off the dance floor. It just seemed like the most natural thing to do since I didn’t get asked to dance, but then I heard Radha’s voice.
“Roxie?”
I stopped. Her arms were still around her date, a tall guy with dark hair. I knew him to be a football player at our school. Radha always dated the jocks when she did.
She came over, taking my arm. “You should dance with Kevin’s brother, Brian.”
Kevin was the guy she’d been dancing with, and Radha pointed, gesturing to a tall guy by the punch table. He looked very similar to Kevin, large build, and dark hair, and I knew him to be just as popular. He played sports, too, soccer I think.
I shrugged. “I…”
“Oh, come on,” she said, taking my hand, and then she did the worst thing. She started to take me toward this guy, this guy who was so beautiful.
My feet skidded. “Radha, no.”
“But he wants to.”
And that made me stop, pause. “He doesn’t.”
“He does,” she said, nodding. “Kevin told me. Why do you think I’m taking you to him?”
I didn’t believe her. It just… it just seemed too weird. I think I would have noticed someone like him watching me. I would have noticed, but then he came closer, leaving his punch cup on a table as Radha gestured him over.
My heart pushed into that tiny space, the one I was supposed to breathe from but couldn’t all the sudden, and then he was in front of me, a tall, gorgeous guy, and I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t think. I just wanted to run. I didn’t want to be here anymore. This was a mistake.
“Brian this is Roxie,” she said. “My sister.”
Her sister.
I looked up at this guy who was even more perfect up close. He had these lips that were full and curved subtly in the corners, and he had the curliest lashes.
He placed his hand out to take mine. “Hi, Roxie. I’m Brian.”
My hand disappeared in his own, shaking it slowly.
“Roxie,” I said, my breathing so rapid.
I felt myself being pushed from behind after that. Heck, he was, too. We were being pushed together, the pair of us by Radha and one of her friends. Before I knew it, Brian and I were out on the dance floor, my hands in both of his.
But then, they weren’t, one of his large hands on the small of my back.
He guided me into him, into the dance, and we ended up by his brother, and my… my sister. They were both there, Radha and Cassidy with their dance partners beside us.
I couldn’t breathe again, but this time it wasn’t bad.
We danced through that whole song, Brian and I, and we chatted a little, too. He was actually a junior, which felt so crazy to me. I was only a freshman, and I was dancing with him. He was dancing with me, and he wanted to.
We got punch together later that night, and his fingers came up to touch mine, my hand on my drink cup.
He brushed my fingers softly, delicately, and made my belly do all kinds of weird things. They felt like such good things.
He leaned in, smelling like cologne. Like something, my dad or someone older would wear.
“Can I kiss you?” he asked me, and things got so tight in my chest. I felt like I was suffocating and breathing at the same time.
He took my free hand before I could answer him and we went some place, behind a curtain. The photographer took pictures in front of it earlier tonight. He slid my empty cup from me, using his fingers to bring me closer by the waist. He was going to kiss me. He wanted to kiss me.
I had never been kissed.
His lips got so close, warm as the distance between us wasn’t far. He dampened them, moving to close the distance even more, but I stepped back. I didn’t know why.
Pulling back, Brian tilted his head. He didn’t say anything, but his eyes shifting told of his confusion. His confusion of me, an oddity. Why wouldn’t a girl want to kiss him? He was so beautiful, so much more than me.
Emotions rushed me at the way he looked at me, whatever thoughts or conclusions he’d made about me, and the thickest sea of panic hit my chest, fear.
As well as embarrassment.
Feeling the influx of it, I made moves to go around him, leave. All of this was too much for me. I wasn’t ready for all this kissing. I just…
We crashed into each other on my way around him, and he dropped my cup, the paper rolling away.
I dipped, patting it on all fours, and that’s when I heard the laughter and gasps.
Gazing up, I saw Radha, as well as a few of her friends and others from our class around her. They all stared, though, not at me.
They looked ahead, above me.
I turned and saw something I didn’t understand. Brian was there, but not how I left him. He had his pants lowered a little, adjusting like he was trying to hurry and get them up.
He managed to do so, re-zipping his fly and buckling his belt next. After he had gotten himself together, he passed me, mumbling, “Thanks, sweetheart” before passing Radha and my classmates.
“I didn’t know you were into doing that, Roxie,” came a voice. It was my sister’s, Radha’s.
Smiling, she crossed her arms over her chest, her head tilted. I didn’t understand the smile. Nothing was funny.
It only felt cruel.
As well as her laughter when it started, her friends slowly behind. The only person who didn’t laugh was Cassidy.
She stood there, seemingly singularly. She watched the scene unfold and said nothing, nor did she do anything. She left me alone, the laughter around us.
The tears burning my eyes, I went to stand, my palms black from the floor, my pretty dress wrinkled and dirty. And I did feel dirty; I couldn’t help it considering what Brian did, what he insinuated happened between us.
Heads back, Radha and her crew laughed their way away from me. They took everything away, my arms shaking as I remained on all fours. I wanted to get up, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t find the strength. I could only look at the floor, then let the tears fall, as the last remaining pair of shoes stepped away from me, going away with Radha and her crew. They were a pair of pink heels.
They matched her pointy-toed flats.
Griffin
I got home a little later than expected, the house dark outside except for the outdoor lights illuminating the driveway and the entryway’s outdoor sconce. I’d been invited to stay out longer; drinks passed my way by businessmen. I had been offered the deal of the century, a role in Roddy Price’s new feature film and it wasn’t just a cameo.
A spot for an athlete had been reserved to partner alongside the main lead, a well-known actor already cast in the role. The actor would be playing, of all things, a doctor of sports medicine and the athlete was needed in more of a sidekick role to him. The athlete also had a healthy speaking part.
I auditioned a few weeks back for it, and well, I must have been good enough because they offered me the gig today. It turned out, Deanna had been right that day on the golf course. I had been vetted. In fact, one of the first to audition.
I shook my head at the thought, unable to wait to tell Roxie. She knew about the audition and role. But she didn’t know about this, the news of me getting the role fresh as of today.
She’d probably be in bed judging by the hour. I did try to hurry home to her but had to stay after my new director/ producer offered me such a huge break. While
those drinks were being passed, I kept my eyes on the time, declining the drinks myself and just being there for the celebration. I thought about checking in on Roxie several times but didn’t want to bug her too much. It felt like I was always checking in on her these days, the closer the baby was to being born the main reason, yes, but in the back of my mind, I knew so much more. She hadn’t mentioned seeing her counselor again, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t.
Trying not to think about that, I unlocked the door, the house dormant, dark. I placed my keys on the hook by the door and took my ball cap off, tossing it on top of the coat rack by the door. I left my shoes there as well and made my way through the house. Furniture and other refurbishments we’d done over the few years we lived here greeted my way and I couldn’t wait to do more. I hoped to have many years in this home and build more on it with Roxie.
Making my way down the hallway, I had to stop at one of those builds that were currently in progress. I flicked on the light and the room filled with yellows, whites, and grays.
I stepped into what would be Jackson’s room, and though there were still tools there, wood and other spare parts, I could see it. I could see us here, the three of us.
I made my way over to the changing table—a hand carved rocking chair right next to it. That had been a gift from my pop. He hand delivered it himself after we made the announcement to the family so many months ago. Not many things could get that man on a plane, but he did just the feat. He did that for his first grandson.
The beautiful piece of furniture went so well in here. It made it feel woodsy, fitting the owl theme that Troy did for Roxie’s baby shower. She really loved owls, and they made their way in here, on the walls and on the night-lights. Thick, wide curtains draped down the back wall, coming together and either keeping the light in or and out.
In front of it all, on display for the world to see was a crib.
Holding onto the wooden bar of it brought some kind of emotion out of me. My son would be sleeping here in a matter of months.
My son.
I picked up the soft, mini basketball in the crib, holding it tight. I wanted to see him and his mom.
I have to at least hold her for a little while. I’ll be quiet.
I returned the ball to the crib and left the room, clicking the light off behind me and closing the door. I made my way down the hall and was surprised to see another light shining from underneath the door.
She’s still up.
My lips lifted into a small smile. Picking up my pace, I made it to our bedroom, catching Roxie immediately. She lay partially underneath the covers, the low back of her pale blue nightgown allowing me to see the expanse of her creamy brown skin. Laying on her side, she had a book in her hand, which could be seen peeking above her shoulder. She must have been reading with only the end table light illuminating the room.
I tapped the doorframe, alerting her to my presence.
“Knock, knock,” I said, coming in and she turned a little, only ever so slightly. I got to her before she could make the full rotation, drawing my shirt off along the way.
“I missed you today,” I told her, pushing my arms around her, the baby. Her book fell from her fingers, hitting the floor with a thump, but I wouldn’t let her pick it up.
I bought her close, kissing her and smelling her skin. I told her I loved her as I buried my nose into her neck and waited to hear her voice. I didn’t care what she said in response. I just wanted to hear it, hear her. What I didn’t expect, though? What I never wanted to expect?
The sound of her tears.
Audible, it came lightly, but steadfast, constant. Pushing Roxie on her back, I had her turn for me and her eyes… they were the damn saddest I’d ever seen.
“Roxie?” I touched her cheek, and then…
Panic. It couldn’t be helped by what I saw, my wife in tears with her hand on her stomach. The dread reared its ugly head and socked me in the gut like a blow to the chest during one of my games.
I covered both her cheeks.
“What’s wrong?” I asked. I urged. Instinctually, my hand went to the bundle between us. Afraid to touch her, put pressure there, I declined and sat up instead.
I reached into my pocket.
“I’ll call the doctor. Tell me what’s wrong—”
“No,” she said, making eye contact with me. She’d been lost for a minute, out of it and more tears fell when she shook her head.
“It’s not… I mean, I’m not… the baby is fine. Jackson’s fine.”
I lowered my phone, but the ache in her voice didn’t do much to relieve any panic, panic for our child, panic for her.
I put the phone on the bed. “What’s going on…?”
But she didn’t let me finish. She simply turned into my side with our baby and when she did.
She sobbed into my chest.
The tears came hot, hard and her whole body shook from the influx.
My arms coming around her, I felt that shake, those intense tremors flowing throughout her limbs. The existence caused a fear to run rapidly within me. In fact, I’d only remembered such fear one other time. It had been when we first moved here.
When I thought I’d lost her.
I held her close now, not understanding the tears, her pain.
“Roxie?” But she wouldn’t speak. She only cried into me.
So I let her, holding her until she was ready until she could tell me. I never rushed Roxie. She always came back to me in time, always.
I waited so long, patiently, and when the words did come, I almost missed them. They’d been so soft.
“I’m so mad,” she said as she finally spoke. “I’m so angry at myself.”
Confused, I drew back, reaching to place a hand on her cheek. I saw the anger that ran deep within her green eyes.
I swept a thumb over her cheek. “What’s making you upset?”
I still didn’t understand and she blinked, taking herself away from me.
She moved her fingers underneath her eyes.
“I let her get to me, Griffin,” she said, tears running so heavily down her cheeks. She blinked some away, but that didn’t stop them.
“Who?” I asked her. I’d never seen her this way.
She answered my question after that and never in my life would I have ever been ready for what she told me.
“Cassidy,” she said, lifting her head to look at me. “My ex-step-sister.”
Griffin
My Mercedes flew the next morning, probably going faster than I should have upon getting off the ferry into town. I never usually took the vintage sports car out, but I needed to get somewhere quickly, needed to get back quickly. I only had so many hours before my wife woke up and I planned to be there for her.
Unlike other parties had in the past.
“I hope it all gets worked out,” Stevie, Roxie’s assistant, said in my ear. I had my Bluetooth headset on and had since getting off the ferry.
After telling her I hoped so, too, I ended the call, pulling my finger away from the earpiece. I called Stevie, Roxie’s co-worker, hoping and praying she had some information on the woman who came in to see Roxie.
Her step-sister.
Shaking my head, I still couldn’t believe the reality of what sent me out today.
But then again, I had the evidence in my hands last night, hadn’t I? My wife in my hands…
“She came in for something. To see me for something…” Roxie had said last night, sniffling.
This had been after she cried herself out, her eyes red, and I’d never un-see that sight. It burned into my brain, her pain. It always had.
My hands gripped the wheel as I zipped through morning traffic, gratefully dormant, as it was so early. I knew exactly where I was going. My car had an excellent navigation system installed a while back. The specific address I was going to only had to be put in.
That’s where Stevie came through.
She had gotten the woman’s address at Roxie’s office ye
sterday. In fact, from what Stevie told me, Roxie’s ex-step-sister had pretty much forced it on her. The woman did want to see Roxie.
It didn’t matter how much she didn’t want to see her.
“I left,” Roxie had told me in my arms. “I don’t know what she wanted with me. I just left. I couldn’t see her. I couldn’t take it…”
As it turned out, after Roxie had left, Stevie forced the woman out. She’d told me as much. She must have picked up on Roxie’s queues, her reaction to her, her step-sister.
I knew I liked Roxie’s assistant. She had a good head on her shoulders. She was a great supplement to my wife and gave her the support she both needed and deserved for her business. In this case, Stevie had handled a situation and done so in a way far better than I could have. I never thought rationally when it came to Roxie, when it came to her in pain.
I breathed, trying to get some semblance of a clear head before walking into the situation I traveled toward. But that was made harder with every word that lingered in my head from last night and only made worse by what I got from Stevie this morning. The address hadn’t been the only thing Stevie got from the woman or at least speculated about.
The woman had been holding her belly when she came to see Roxie, a little nub, and that only put things into perspective for me, as well as infuriate the hell out of me.
Neither of the girls had apparently known the reason why this woman went to see Roxie. Stevie had kicked her out after getting her address, and well, Roxie had left well before. But considering the situation, Roxie and my situation, the woman’s reasoning, at least to me anyway, seemed crystal clear.
It was no mystery that Roxie and I were doing all right, the last few years a blessing for us with the opportunities we’d been given, and if that woman knew that and was pregnant on top…
I pulled up to a house, a blur as to how I even got there. I had to have followed the GPS’ commands, but I had no recollection, my vision nothing but red.
Finding a number on the mailbox outside, I confirmed the address, turning off my car. After getting out, I shut the door, trying to keep calm, my body literally shaking to do it. But how could I? How could that be managed when I was about to approach the very person who’d caused my wife such heartache in the past? Roxie had told me stories, enough about her previous stepfamily to understand the reality of what they put her through.
Cherished by You: A Found by You Finale Novella Page 7