“Well, I’ve prayed about it, and God said I should quit and give Him more of my time.”
“So why are you just now telling me this?”
“Because we haven’t been talking.”
Samson sneered. “It’s not because I haven’t tried. It would have taken you only a few minutes to discuss this with me.”
“Get over it. I’m discussing it with you now.”
“So when is your last day?”
“That’s just it. I haven’t quit yet. I’m just thinking about it.”
“Julia, I’m going to pray about it. When I get an answer, I’ll let you know.”
Julia seemed to calm down. “That’s all I want you to do, honey. See, with us being together more, that may help us in other areas.”
She gathered up their empty plates and took them to the kitchen. Samson, full and confused about how to handle Julia’s request, hung his head and prayed. The carnal man wanted her to continue to work. With everything so fickle, the more money they had coming into the household, the better. His salary from Peaceful Rest was enough to take care of both of them, but he was by no means one of the wealthiest preachers in the area.
People assumed with his TV ministry, he would be. What they didn’t realize was that it took money to broadcast every week, and if sponsors were low, the church had to pay the difference. There had been several times he forfeited his salary so that the Word could be preached to the masses.
Julia came and wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him on the head. “I love you. I really do. I’m sorry I’ve been such a you-know-what lately.”
“I’m sorry too. I’ve been taking out my frustrations on you.”
“Well, that’s in the past. Let’s promise we’ll both do better, okay?”
“Deal,” Samson said. By now, he had Julia sitting in his lap. They kissed. Still no reaction and more disappointment for Samson.
“Why don’t you go upstairs and change into something sexy,” he suggested.
Julia smiled. “You don’t have to tell me twice. I’ll be waiting.” Julia kissed him and twisted out of the room.
When Julia was out of eyesight, Samson retrieved the pill from the bottle he had hidden in his pocket. Before he could take it, his cell phone rang. “Delilah, I’m at home now. Whatever it is can wait until tomorrow?”
Delilah wailed from the other end of the phone. “I don’t know what I’ll do, Samson. All the memories just came flooding back.”
“Let’s pray.” Samson prayed, hoping Julia wouldn’t walk in at this time.
Delilah responded from the other end. “Thanks for the prayer, but I need to see you.”
“I can’t,” Samson insisted.
“If you don’t come, I don’t know what I’ll do,” Delilah cried from the other end of the phone.
Samson didn’t want Delilah to do something crazy. Knowing he would probably live to regret it, he responded, “Okay. I’ll be there. Don’t do anything irrational.”
“Julia,” he called. Samson knew Julia was not going to be happy if he didn’t come to the bedroom and deliver.
“Come here, big boy,” Julia said, as she slipped from under the covers wearing sheer, pink-laced lingerie.
Samson moved closer. “Baby, that was a church member. They are having suicidal thoughts. I have to go stop them from doing anything crazy.”
Julia plopped down on the bed. “Are we ever going to do it?”
“Yes, dear, but you know the church is important to me.”
She sighed. “Okay.” She got out of bed. “Let me get dressed, and I’ll go with you.”
“No, baby, I want you well rested. It shouldn’t take me long,” Samson said.
“But you don’t know that. You said the person was suicidal.”
“I’ve handled plenty of situations like this. Sometimes they only want to know someone cares.”
She picked up the sheer robe and slipped it on. “Okay, well, if you need me, call me.”
“I will, sweetheart. I’ll be back soon.” Samson kissed her on the lips.
He hated lying to Julia, but she would never understand this need for him to comfort Delilah. How could she when he didn’t seem to understand it himself?
Chapter 35
Delilah made sure her hair looked a little disheveled. She blotted a wet towel to her eyes, and it smeared her mascara. The doorbell rang. “Perfect timing,” she said out loud, then answered the door. “Oh, Samson.” Delilah threw herself in his arms as soon as he walked in the door.
Samson held her up and led her to the sofa. “Let’s pray.” He reached for her hand.
Delilah watched Samson as he prayed for her mental healing. He was praying in vain because in Delilah’s opinion, she was perfectly sane. Samson released her hand, and she smiled to appease him. “Thank you. I feel better already,” Delilah sniffed.
“I have a friend who’s a doctor. I’ll call him tomorrow so he can maybe prescribe something for the anxiety you’ve been feeling lately.”
“I have some medicine. I just don’t like taking it because it increases my appetite, and I sure don’t need to gain any more weight.”
Samson didn’t agree or disagree verbally, but his eyes let her know that he didn’t think anything was wrong with her weight. She recalled the kiss from earlier. It took her all evening to devise the plan to get him to her house so they could finish where they’d left off. Now that he was here, she wouldn’t be satisfied until he gave her what she wanted.
“Samson, do you think it’s possible for a person to mean well, even if the end result turns out to be bad?”
“It depends. Can you elaborate?”
“I’m talking hypothetically.”
“You can have good intentions. It happens to me sometimes. We all make mistakes; we just can’t keep making the same ones.”
“Do you think our kiss earlier was a mistake?” Delilah licked her lips.
“It shouldn’t have happened.”
“That’s not what I asked you.”
“I could have used better judgment.”
“But I don’t see anything wrong with what happened. We were two people caught up in the moment.”
“That flies in the movies, Delilah, but in real life, no.”
Delilah’s hand found its way on top of Samson’s thigh. She rubbed it. She expected him to move it, but he didn’t. He swallowed out loud. “You seem a little tense,” she said.
“I have a lot on my mind.”
Delilah continued to rub his leg. “You can push my hand away. I won’t be mad.” She enjoyed teasing him.
He moved his leg. “It looks like you’re all right now, so I’ll be going.” He jumped up. Delilah stood up, blocking his path.
She placed her hand on his chest. “I have a confession to make. I sort of lied to get you over here.”
“These games need to stop.” Samson’s nostrils flared up.
“Don’t be mad. You were so tense earlier, I just wanted you to get out and have a good time.”
“I left my wife to come see about you.”
“And it means a lot to me.”
He placed his arm on her shoulders and attempted to nudge her to the side, but Delilah wouldn’t move. Delilah felt like it was now or never. She got on her tiptoes and plastered a kiss on Samson’s lips. At first he resisted, but before long he gave in and started kissing her back. “Where are your cameras?” Samson asked.
“I got rid of them,” Delilah responded.
Delilah led Samson to her bedroom and stripped for him. She smiled because, unlike with his wife, he didn’t need a little pill to perform, and Samson put on a performance. She should have felt guilty sleeping with a married man—her pastor at that—but she didn’t. She felt it was her duty as a member of the Pastor’s Aide committee to help out the first lady.
If Samson weren’t with her, he would find some other skank who would care only about the money, not the man. Yes, she was doing Samson, Julia, and Peaceful Rest a f
avor.
Moments later, Delilah watched Samson snore. He had been at her place for two hours. She didn’t want him to leave, but she knew waking him up and sending him back to Julia was the right thing to do—for now, that is. Soon, Samson would realize she was the woman he should be with and serve Julia with divorce papers.
“Baby, you need to wake up.” Delilah gently nudged Samson.
“Let me get one more hour,” Samson said as he turned and cuddled her.
“No, baby, you got to go now.”
When he came to his senses, he couldn’t get out of Delilah’s bed fast enough. “Lord, what have I done? I can’t believe I did this. Why didn’t you stop me?”
Delilah responded, “Because I wanted it just as much as you did.”
“This can’t happen again. Promise me, you won’t tell anyone.”
Delilah smiled. “It’ll be our little secret.”
Chapter 36
Samson burnt rubber getting out of Delilah’s driveway and into his own. He checked his appearance several times before getting out of his truck and going into the house through the garage door. He had several missed calls on his cell phone from Julia, but guilt wouldn’t allow him to return any of them.
All the lights were off. He took his time going up the stairs, careful not to make much noise. The sound of the television could be heard from the hallway. Julia’s back was toward the door, so he didn’t know if she was sleeping or awake. He tiptoed to the other side of the bed. He looked in her direction, and her eyes were closed.
He went to the master bathroom. He could still smell Delilah’s scent on his body so there was no way he would get in the bed next to Julia. He would take his chances by showering first. He placed his dirty clothes in the hamper. A few minutes later, the hot water cascaded down his body as he thought about the events that led up to him cheating on his wife.
It was now official. His lustful thoughts had led him to act, and now he was an adulterer. As much as he wanted to blame Delilah for what had happened, he couldn’t. He had the opportunity to walk away, but he didn’t. Instead, after she said there were no cameras, he allowed his libido to control his actions. At no time did he think about the beautiful woman who now lay in his bed, the woman he vowed to be faithful to.
Although only two people knew about his affair, he was ashamed of himself. He was supposed to be better than the average man. He was a man of God. He was the leader of a flock—a flock that depended on him to be without blemish.
It didn’t matter how long he stayed in the shower. The water could not wash away his sins. Samson closed his eyes and let the water flow down his body as he prayed. “Father God, I’ve given the enemy a front-row seat in my life. Cleanse me, Lord, so that I can serve you and be right in your eyes. Lord, forgive me for the sins that I committed. Please protect Julia so she won’t find out her husband failed her.”
Tears flowed down his face mixing with the water as he continued to pray. Afterward, he turned the water off, got out of the shower and dried off with a towel, not knowing how long he had been in the bathroom. When he re-entered the bedroom, Julia’s back was now in the direction of the bathroom. He slipped underneath the covers and cuddled his wife. Her body stiffened, but she didn’t move his arms. He held her close and they slept in that position most of the night.
Samson’s arms flapped over an empty space in the bed the next morning. He shifted in bed. Julia, fully dressed, sat at the edge of the bed staring down at him. “What time is it?” he asked, as he sat up.
She ignored his question. “What time did you get in last night?” she asked.
“It was after nine.”
“More like after ten. I stayed up as long as I could, but I knew I had a long day today, so I went to bed.”
“I’m sorry.” Samson’s eyes darted away.
“So what happened?”
“Baby, I can’t go into details. I vowed I would keep their situation confidential.” He wasn’t completely telling a lie. Delilah’s childhood trauma wasn’t up for discussion. As a pastor, he had to make people feel confident that what they shared with him would remain with him and not be broadcast.
“But I’m your wife. Your mother told me that your dad would share things with her.”
Samson’s mom would be a thorn in their relationship. She needed to keep her comments to herself. “I’m not my dad.”
“So are you saying you don’t trust me to keep the information to myself?” Julia placed one of her hands on her hip.
“No, don’t put words in my mouth.”
“Then, Samson Judges, what are you saying?”
“You have enough on your plate being married to me. You don’t need all this extra drama. People’s problems can weigh you down.”
Julia moved near him. “I’m your helpmate. Let me help ease some of the burden. Maybe you wouldn’t be so tense.” She rubbed his upper arm.
Samson felt bad because the only thing he wanted Julia to do was stop. He didn’t want her touching him right now. The guilt from last night made him want to confess, but he knew it would be the wrong thing to do. Julia didn’t deserve to be hurt that way, so he kept the affair to himself.
Samson held her hand in his. “Baby, I appreciate you offering, but I think I have everything covered.”
“I’m here if you need me.” The sincerity in her voice softened Samson’s heart.
“Why don’t we talk later about you taking a more active role in the ministry.”
“Thanks.” Julia hugged him.
Samson closed his eyes and held her tight. They kissed before releasing each other. “You sure smell good. What’s that you’re wearing?”
“It’s called Heat. One of my sorors got it for me. It’s a fragrance by Beyonce.”
“I like it,” Samson said.
“I hoped you would. I sprayed some on last night, but we know how that ended.”
Samson broke their eye contact. If eyes were windows to the soul, he didn’t want Julia to see the guilt that surfaced.
Chapter 37
Delilah felt no remorse for sleeping with Samson—well, a little—but the feeling passed through her quickly as she thought back to the moment Samson took the first move. Granted, she made it hard for him to resist her, but he could have walked away. He didn’t, though. He didn’t have to come over to her place, but he did.
She didn’t lie to Samson when she told him that she didn’t have any cameras hooked up. She didn’t need them because she had a permanent video of them and their sexual encounter embedded in her head. She lay in bed most of the morning, hugging the pillow where Samson laid and replayed their time together the previous night over and over.
The phone ringing interrupted her daydream. “Hi, Samson. I’m so glad you called. I missed you too.” Delilah was so excited to hear Samson’s voice on the other end, she didn’t give him a chance to talk.
“Delilah, I wanted to make sure things were cool between us.”
Delilah sat up in bed. “More than cool. I got your back. You know it.”
“Good. Then I don’t have to worry about you telling anyone what happened last night, do I?”
Delilah knew she should be mad. He seemed to only care about what others would think. She had to look at things from his point of view. He was the pastor and now a married man. “Samson, our little secret will remain between us, okay?”
“About our next session, maybe we should—”
Delilah didn’t allow him to finish. “I need our session more than ever. You helped me get through that bleak moment.”
“There won’t be any repeats of last night.”
Delilah laughed. She knew and he knew that what happened between them was only the beginning. If he wanted to pretend it didn’t mean a thing, then she would play along with his charade. “Whatever you want, Samson.”
“Thanks, Delilah. You have a good day now.”
“I will now that I’ve heard from you.”
Delilah hung up with Samson a
nd quickly dialed Keisha’s number. She blurted out what happened. Keisha repeated over and over: “You’re going to burn in hell. Ooh. I can’t believe you slept with him again. Girl, God is not going to let you get away with that.”
Delilah listened as Keisha went on and on about why she thought Delilah was wrong. “Are you finished?” Delilah asked.
“You ain’t got to worry about me. You need to be on your knees asking God to be easy on you.”
“It’s not like I made him sleep with me. He made the first move.”
“Come on. You set the stage for it, playing the ‘woe is me’ role.”
Delilah couldn’t disagree with her. She knew exactly what she was doing the moment she dialed Samson’s number and asked him—well, tricked him by faking emotional distress—to come over. Delilah ended her call with Keisha. Her phone beeped reminding her about the Pastor’s Aide committee meeting scheduled for later that afternoon. The meeting was set about an hour before Bible Study.
Delilah spent the rest of the day working on a report she owed a coworker at Trusts Enterprise. She finished the report and hit the send button in her e-mail. When she was finished with that, she surfed the Internet. “I wonder if Samson’s online.”
She attempted to send him an instant message, but it wouldn’t go through. She logged on to her Facebook account and sent him a private message. She typed the words: I didn’t say anything to give away what happened last night. I just said thank you for helping me. If anyone wants to read more into it, then that’s them. Once she hit the send button, she logged off her computer and headed to church.
Delilah arrived in the church parking lot at the same time the Pastor’s Aide meeting was scheduled to start. She headed straight to the fellowship hall. She waited outside the door until Dorothy finished praying. When she heard Dorothy say amen, she walked into the room.
“What are you doing here?” Dorothy asked.
“This is a Pastor’s Aide meeting, right?” Delilah stood staring Dorothy straight in the eyes.
“Yes, it is.”
“Then I’m in the right room.”
Delilah Page 13