The two areas the Shearans had been uncertain of were thin spots with ragged edges. Faith wondered if they would one day become jump points, but there was no way to know that for sure. They marked them both, then moved on. They’d saved the potential jump point for last since it was an hour away. They went to the cafeteria for a late lunch while waiting, and returned to the Observation Deck just as the Eyrie reached it.
“Tristan,” Gray said as he sat down at his vid terminal. “Captain Rolin reports that sensors have located a potential jump-point that the Shearans missed, not far from this one.”
“Very good,” Tristan said. “We’ll check it next.”
Faith stood by the viewport, watching as the ship adjusted it’s angle so that the area that the Shearans had found was directly in front of her. It was definitely a jump point, ragged edges and all, and as big as the others they’d found. She looked into it, but saw nothing on the other side but empty space. Not a star, not a moon, not a planet. A creeping sensation trickled down the back of her scalp, making her shiver.
“It’s definitely a jump point,” she said. “But I don’t think it would be a good idea for anyone to enter it.”
“Why not?” Gray asked.
“It goes...nowhere,” Faith said, then shook her head. “No, that’s not what I mean. It goes somewhere. Somewhere that’s completely dark. All I can see is total blackness. Just thinking about going there makes me feel...sick. And scared.”
“Let’s see if a different angle will change things,” Tristan said. He spoke into his vox and the ship moved. Faith shook her head and the ship moved again. Fifteen minutes later they’d tried every possible angle, but Faith never saw a single thing.
“Honestly, Tristan, it’s not a good place,” Faith said, a note of pleading in her voice that they’d never heard from her before. “More than that, it’s a bad place. Please don’t send anyone in there. If you do, you’ll never see them again.”
“I can’t promise you that no one will ever go in there, Faith,” Tristan said. “This is not our system. I can only recommend to Sheara 3 that they avoid this area. However, I can, and do, promise that I will never send anyone in there.”
“Thank you,” Faith said with relief. She looked out the viewport and shivered again. “If there really is a hell, that’s where it will be. That is not a place meant for the living.”
Tristan turned back to his vid terminal and changed his recommendation to Sheara 3 from inadvisable to strongly advise against. He then sent the coordinates of the jump point to the rest of the task force with orders to avoid it at all costs. It was the best he could do.
Ten minutes later they reached the anomaly their own captain had found. They’d been hoping to find jump points that would take them closer to Onddo, but so far they’d come up empty. Tristan tried to keep his expectations in check. So far Faith had shaved a month off of their journey. Asking for more was greedy.
“Yes, it’s a jump point,” Faith said as she gazed through the viewport at the last anomaly. “Ragged edges, very big. I can see worlds on the other side.” She turned around, a worried expression on her face. “You wouldn’t happen to have a map on this ship like you had on the cutter, would you?”
“Yes, we had one set up in here for you,” Tristan said, to her relief. Without a map, she had no idea how she’d ever be able to let them know where any jump point led. She just didn’t know enough...make that anything...about space.
Faith watched as Jon moved to another control panel and pressed a few buttons. The lights dimmed and the room filled with the now familiar sight of planets, moons, and stars. Gray walked toward a small brown and green world, then stopped. Faith joined him, looking up at the tiny orb.
“That’s Sheara 3,” he said. “Where we are now.”
Faith looked around, glanced out the viewport, and started walking. It was easier than it had been on the cutter since the room was so much bigger and had more empty floor space. She walked away from Jon, paused, walked some more, checked the viewport and kept going. Tristan’s excitement rose higher and higher with each step she took. When she stopped short of their ultimate destination he felt a moment’s disappointment. Then he shook his head at himself. If this jump point went where she was indicating, it was more than close enough.
“There,” Faith said, pointing to a yellow-green world with small patches of blue scattered around it. “That’s where this jump point leads.”
Jon joined her, looked up and grinned. “Crian,” he confirmed.
Tristan and Gray grinned too. “Fantastic,” Tristan said. “Gray, prepare a scout.”
Gray nodded and reached for his vox.
“I take it this is good news?” Faith asked, watching Jon walk across the room to turn off the map, the smooth flow of muscles beneath his snug uniform all but hypnotizing her. She tore her eyes from the sight and forced herself to pay attention to Tristan.
“Yes,” he was saying, “this is very good news. Crian is a world populated by a young, primitive species not yet ready to venture into space. It lies near the edge of the spiral arm of our galaxy in which the Thousand Worlds are located and, as you can see, a great distance from our current position. But it’s only about a week’s travel from Onddo.”
“One week?” Faith squeaked in amazement. “Really?”
“A week to ten days, depending on our location once we get to the other side,” Tristan said, grinning. “You, Miss Faith Meyers, have just transformed a journey of many months into one of only a handful of days.”
“Wow, that’s just...amazing,” she said, hardly able to accept that she’d done it. She had, finally, done something really important. Something that mattered. .
She smiled. It was a very good feeling.
Chapter Twenty-One
Of the three ships that the Xanti had fired upon, only one sustained damage when a missile penetrated its shields. The damage was minor, and the cruiser’s captain promised it would be repaired and ready to go by the time the rest of the task force crossed through the jump point. While waiting, the Vyand, the Eyrie, and the Ala-Lahoi rechecked Shearan space for more anomalies. Two were found but Faith identified both as thin spots, not jump points. Nevertheless, the Shearans were extremely pleased with the discoveries in their system, particularly the Xanti Doors.
Aside from identifying those two new anomalies, Faith had the remainder of the day to do as she pleased. She spent much of it reading. She was amazed at the lengths the Jasani had to go through in order to mate with human women in an effort to preserve their race. The one thing that struck her the most was the fact that there was no divorce for Jasani males. They could mate only once. At the same time, there was nothing to stop a human woman from leaving a male-set if she chose to do so. It wasn’t that the laws were different for human women. There was no divorce on Jasan for anyone. But, a woman could leave Jasan if she wanted, and no Clan Jasani would raise a finger to stop her. She could then get a divorce on her home planet and remarry if she chose to do so. Clan Jasani did not have that option.
Faith kept trying to imagine what it would be like to put her entire future in the hands of someone who did not have to take the same risk. She didn’t think she could ever agree to such a thing.
“Faith,” Tristan said when she turned off the hand terminal later that afternoon.
“Yes?” she asked, standing up to stretch.
“Where would you like to have dinner tonight?”
“I guess the Observation Deck is out,” she said, looking around at the vid terminals and control panels that now filled the room. “What are the options?”
“The cafeteria, your room, or we can dine in my room, if you like,” Tristan offered.
Faith didn’t feel up to being stared at, so the cafeteria was out. And even though she was not afraid of the Falcorans, she wasn’t ready to invite them to her room. “Your room would be nice. What time?”
“Would two hours be acceptable?” Tristan asked. “We need to spend an hour o
r so in the Roar Room.”
“Did you say roar room?” Faith asked.
“Yes,” Tristan said, smiling. “That’s a nickname for the room we use when we need to shift for a time. All Jasani ships have one. Officially it’s called a Shift Chamber.”
“You’re going to shift?” Faith asked, intrigued. She knew that Clan Jasani were shifters, but she hadn’t actually seen any of them in their alter forms. “Into what? Falcons?”
“Our falcorans are much like what you would call a falcon,” he replied. “If you would like to watch, we have no objection.”
“Yes, I would,” Faith said. “If you’re sure you don’t mind.”
“Positive,” Tristan said. “Let’s go.” They left the Observation Deck, Faith walking with Tristan at her side, Gray and Jon behind them, and Bubbles on her shoulder.
“How far did you get in your reading today?” Gray asked once they were on the elevator.
“I just finished the section on taking human women as mates, and what you have to go through to make that work,” she said. “You guys have to risk an awful lot.”
“Yes,” Tristan said. Something in his voice made Faith look up at him. His jaw was tight, his face set in the cool, closed expression he’d worn when she first met him.
“I apologize,” she said. “I didn’t mean to say anything to upset you.”
She watched Tristan’s effort to control his feelings. It took a moment, but he smiled down at her. “It is not your fault,” he said. “Please, think no more of it.”
Faith nodded, but she was curious. Is that what happened to them? she wondered. Had they mated with a woman who’d left them? She was surprised at the strength of the emotions that rose in her at the thought.
Jealousy that they’d married another woman. Anger that the woman had hurt them so deeply. And, worst of all, a deep sadness that she didn’t understand at all.
Tristan, Gray, and Jon felt the rapidly changing emotions that ran through Faith. They were curious as to the cause, and alarmed by the depth of her sudden sadness.
“Are you all right?” Tristan asked, after they left the elevator on the same floor as their rooms. Instead of turning right towards their rooms, they turned left.
Faith nodded and forced a smile. “Fine,” she said. Tristan decided to let it go since she clearly didn’t want to talk about it. After a few moments he stopped in front of an unmarked door.
“Is this it?” Faith asked.
“Yes,” Tristan said, pushing the door open. She stepped inside a narrow ante room with a window set into the far wall. She crossed to the window and saw that it overlooked an enormous room covered with thick white padding on the floor, walls, and very high ceiling. She was surprised that such a large room existed on a ship.
Bubbles started making excited popping noises and Faith glanced down at her, smiling to see the raktsasa sitting up on her hind legs, her eyes wide as she gazed through the window. “You like that, do you?” Faith asked. Bubbles turned to look at her, then placed her forepaws on Faith’s cheek and gave her several popping kisses.
“I think she wants to go in there and shift, too,” Faith said. “I thought Mr. Fray said raktsasa only shifted when they were angry.”
“In general I suppose that’s true,” Jon said. “Remember, though, that most people who have them are not shifters themselves, and would probably not be comfortable with it. Their raktsasa only shift when they absolutely must. We’re different. To us, shifting is a normal part of life, and she knows that.”
“I certainly don’t have a problem with it,” Faith said. “It’s who and what she is. Would you guys mind if she went in there with you?”
“Of course not,” Gray said. He approached Faith and place his hand next to Bubbles. “Come, little one, let’s go play.”
Bubbles was nearly jumping up and down with excitement, but she paused to look at Faith expectantly. “Go on and have some fun,” Faith said to her. “I’ll wait right here, I promise.”
Bubbles gave her another quick kiss, then leapt onto Gray’s waiting hand. Faith watched as the four of them left through a side door, then turned to watch them through the window. The Falcorans spread out, leaving several yards in between them. Gray walked an extra few yards and set Bubbles on the padded floor, then returned to his place.
Faith watched as, one by one, the Falcorans began to expand, quickly changing into gigantic birds with black fur except for markings on their chests and wings that matched their brightly colored eyes. They stretched their wings out, then launched themselves off the floor and began flying around the room. Once they were all in the air, she turned her gaze to Bubbles, who was still sitting there watching the Falcorans. Then, without warning, Bubbles shifted into the huge bear shaped creature Faith had seen earlier. She had long curving claws on all six of her paws, and a mouth full of long sharp teeth. Even with such an impressive array of weapons, Faith still thought Bubbles was cute with her long bright red fur going in every direction, and her big, oval shaped red eyes.
Bubbles rose up on her hind paws, her head tilted back as she watched the Falcorans for a few moments. Then she put all six feet on the floor and began running in circles around the room, leaping high into the air occasionally as though trying to catch one of the Falcorans, though she never swiped her wicked looking claws at them.
After burning off some of their pent up energy, the Falcorans began playing with Bubbles. They’d chase her, she’d leap after them, then do somersaults in the air before one of them started chasing her again. Faith laughed at their antics until tears rolled down her cheeks. She hadn’t had such fun in a very long time.
The Falcorans were so much more...everything...than she ever would have guessed that first day. They were kind, gentle, intelligent, protective, and thoughtful. Even without knowing why they’d behaved as they had when she first met them, she forgave them for it. She understood the need to barricade yourself behind an emotional wall to keep yourself safe.
They were also incredibly handsome, powerful, and sexy as hell. The acute embarrassment she’d felt after throwing herself into Tristan’s arms earlier had faded. She still didn’t understand why she’d done it, but it had felt good. Really good. And right. When Gray and Jon had moved close, she’d felt protected rather than threatened. She’d actually been disappointed when they refrained from touching her. Shocked at her own feelings, she’d backed away from Tristan, even though her body yearned to return to his embrace. She reminded herself that they did not want her, and the pain accompanying that thought nearly took her breath away. Then she remembered that she could not be their Arima, and why, and some of the pain eased.
When the Falcorans landed and shifted back to their human forms, Bubbles did the same, then leapt onto Jon’s shoulder and wrapped herself around his neck, purring her thanks. The moment Jon entered the ante room, Bubbles sprung from his shoulder to Faith’s, then proceeded to rub against her jaw, give her kisses, and purr all at the same time.
“You are very welcome,” Faith said. She looked up at the Falcorans, still smiling. “That was fun to watch. But, it also makes me a little sad.”
“Sad?” Tristan asked, surprised. He reached for Faith’s emotions without thinking. She was happy, but there was definitely a thread of sadness, though it didn’t feel the same as the sadness they’d sensed from her earlier. “Why are you sad?”
“Bubbles enjoyed that so much,” Faith said. “I think it’s something she needs, just like you guys need it, and I’ll be sure that she gets to do it regularly. But, it makes me sad for those raktsasa who don’t get to express that part of themselves.”
“Yes, it is difficult for us to imagine,” Jon agreed. “We could never suppress our true natures, or pretend to be other than we are.”
Faith dropped her eyes. She’d pretended to be other than she was for a long time, but had no intention of saying so. “I think I’ll take a shower before dinner.”
“Sounds like an excellent idea to me,” Tristan
said, leading the way to the door as he wondered silently about her sudden shift in mood. Jon had been right from the beginning. They had to offer her their trust. Until then, they couldn’t hope to earn hers.
An hour later, showered, dressed and carrying a freshly groomed Bubbles on her shoulder, Faith stood in front of Tristan’s door and took a deep breath before knocking softly. Gray opened the door, then stepped back to invite her in. Faith forced herself to take slow, deep breaths and not stare. The more relaxed she got with the Falcorans, the more her hormones seemed to react to them. The feelings of arousal that were creeping up on her more and more frequently were both disconcerting and uncomfortable. Why did this have to happen? she wondered. Maybe she was getting too used to them, another idea that made her inexplicably sad.
“Faith?” Gray asked. “Are you all right?”
Faith pasted a smile on her face. “I’m fine,” she said as she stepped past him into the room. She saw that the food had already been delivered and the table set. “Am I late?”
“No, you are not late,” Tristan said. “We are just a bit early.”
“I suppose you guys are hungry after all that exercise.” Bubbles rumbled from her shoulder and she laughed. “Bubbles is hungry too.”
She took the chair Tristan offered, and smiled her thanks at Jon when he placed a low table beside her for Bubbles. She put the raktsasa’s food down and grinned as she watched Bubbles race down her arm and dig in. “You’d think she was starving, but I gave her some packaged food a while ago.”
“Shifting takes a lot of energy,” Gray said. “We’ll try to eat with better manners than Bubbles, but we make no promises.”
“I’ll pretend not to notice so long as you don’t bury your faces in your food like she is.”
The Falcoran’s Faith Page 19