by DC Bastien
[Ashroe: Ah, my conscience. Where were you when I had my last crisis?]
[Sianor: Probably reading a book.]
[Ashroe: No wonder I have so many crises.]
[Sianor: Sorry. You should have signed up for a more reliable service.]
[Ashroe: When the renewal comes around, I'll upgrade.]
[Sianor: And ditch me? :(]
[Ashroe: And get you 24/7.]
[Sianor: If we don't get Avery at some point, Kip is not going to be the only unhappy camper, OK?]
[Ashroe: Alright :)]
***
Chapter Four - Mission: Education
"You sure this is the right place, Cap'n?" Biann asked, peering out through the reinforced glass as the ship finalised docking details. "You really want to pick up cargo here?"
"Yep. Turns out the Sianar Za occasionally has supernumerary jobs. Usually things that could do with moving a bit faster than his fleet can manage, but not enough to commission a ship full-time to doing."
The engineer turned, her brow creased in a frown. "Legal?"
"Yes, legal! Completely, totally, incredibly legitimate."
"Sounds fishy to me. Like it's a made up job."
"Maybe it is. Maybe he wants to throw a few bars our way to keep Kre from starving or selling her tail to unsavoury characters to make ends meet."
"Captain!"
"What? I can't say I go in for the ladies who are a more than a foot taller than me on a bad day, but some folks would."
Biann growled, and cuffed his upper arm. "No prostituting crew-members. Remember?"
"I never said I was going to, I said she might--"
Another growl, almost Sianar-like.
Vadim threw his hands up in defeat. "Alright, alright. I'll stop joking about selling bed-space."
"What are we here to collect?" she asked, immediately back to her usual self.
"Not sure. Sealed, diplomatic crates. And no, that doesn't equate to 'illegal'. Diplomatic immunity covers... all sorts of things."
"But why would someone want to move things undeclared?"
"When I am in a position to know, and if it's suitable for you to know, you will know."
"...I will?"
"You will. But for now, we just nod, take the boxes, and put them where the Za wants them put. Then we use our nice, transferrable bricks to acquire other nice, transferrable goods. And we enjoy them. That's capitalism."
"Okay. How long do we got, planetside?"
"Enough time for some R&R. Just as long as we get the shipment on first, you can have until the continent's sunfall."
"I've never been to Karail before." On her tiptoes, Biann pushed her nose up against the glass. "I bet it's expensive."
"It is. If you see something you like, get the details of it. Then we'll get a replica back somewhere more reasonable."
Biann dropped down onto her soles, her shoulders slumping.
The Captain paced forwards, hovering, his hand almost lifting, but then falling back to his side. "Hey... hey... was it something I said?"
"I'm just... I'm always going to be replica, aren't I? Never... never real."
"You think fancy clothes and expensive foods are 'real'? Twinkle... they're just trappings. I'd rather ride around with you all day in a spit-and-tape cart than spend ten minutes in high society."
"You're just saying that so you don't lose your engineer to a fine suitor," she said, though it was clear from the colour high on her normally pale cheeks and across her forehead that the compliment was appreciated.
"You find a nice suitor, you get wed. Make sure he's got money, then he comes across some kind of minor accident, and--"
Another smack, this one harder.
"Not everyone is as mercenary as you," she said, and flounced off back to her room.
"Not everyone hits as hard as you."
"Big baby."
Vadim leaned around the corner to yell at her back, but she shut the door to her quarters just as he peered around. "...fine. Mes? Set everyone's pagers to remind them if they get anywhere so far as they need to set right back out before sundown."
"Understood, Captain."
Thumbs under his belt, Vadim hitched his cargo pants higher. "Time to see if the old dock-master still remembers me."
"The warrant you had open against has since expired, Captain. I could check the staffing rosters of the dock if you wish?"
"Where's the fun in that?"
***
"Okay, I'm going to have to ask."
Loap turned his seat, looking up from his console. "What will you have to ask, Saidhe?"
"Three boxes. Three boxes that even I could carry. What could be in those three boxes that warrants sending us all the way to Karail and then to Jazibe - at full speed, with mileage paid for and then some - to get?"
"Am I supposed to know the answer?" the Roq asked. "Is this a rhetorical question?"
"Well, it's a real question," Saidhe replied, though she had deflated a little. "But I get that you won't know the answer. It's just bugging me, is all. If it was a fake job just to keep us out of trouble, wouldn't you have us carry real cargo? Make it look real?"
"Size is not everything, Saidhe."
"I know that, but... I guess I've been on this ship too long. I second-guess everything."
"A wise precaution." Loap turned back to his console, his claws flying over the controls without really needing to think about it. "The boxes are sealed, however, and Messenger cannot scan into them. Nor can we re-seal them without our interference being registered."
"It's... aurgh! It's like it was designed to drive me crazy! Carrying things around, not knowing if it's just a bunch of paperweights, or if it's some top-secret documents, or if it's a test to see if we open the crates, or--"
"You are over-thinking this, little Helios."
"I know. I know! And I know that I know."
"You're not going to feel better worrying over it. You can't change it, so you must... accept it. That's the only way to live with things beyond your control."
"A crowbar would get them under my control," she grumbled.
"Indeed. Unless it was a test, which you then failed."
"Okay, okay, I will stop... obsessing over it." She pushed her controls a bit harder than she needed to, and she knew he'd be able to hear.
"You won't, but it's alright. If it helps, you could ask Kre if she knows, or if she would open them?"
"Nope. Boxes. Stay shut. That's what the man said, so..."
"So the boxes will stay shut."
"I'm going to be there when they take them, though, when we get to Jazibe."
Loap let out a little snort through narrowed nostrils. "You think they will open them up in front of you?"
"I think I'll see on their faces if they are playing along, or if it's a genuine shipment."
"You think the workers sent to receive the parcels would know their contents?"
"No. But the overseer? Yes."
"...I concede the point. Very well, oh curious one. I will be with you."
"You don't have to."
"No, but now I want to. You are... rubbing off on me."
"Good man. If no one asks the important questions, where are we?"
"Left with closed boxes, I presume."
***
[Sianor: Tell. Me. You. Saw. It.]
[Ashroe: I saw it.]
[Sianor: We need to bring in Waith. Tell me you agree!]
[Ashroe: Oh, I agree. It's been a long time since someone sent shivers down my spine like that.]
[Sianor: He and Eru...]
[Ashroe: Will be BFFs. Yes. Or BEFs.]
[Sianor: Best Enemies Forever?]
[Ashroe: Oh yes. I think our uberplot got a little more... complex?]
[Sianor: And the thing with LOAP. We HAVE to use that.]
[Ashroe: I don't bloody know how yet, but yes, we do. I think I need to do some of those genetics charts to understand it all.]
[Sianor: Ooh, I hated doing those,
so good luck.]
[Ashroe: Yeah, and whatever I decide will likely later be contradicted, but... eh. So. You liked it, then?]
[Sianor: Did I! It was back to season one quality again, which is good. The last few episodes... they could have been normal sitcoms just in space, sort of thing.]
[Ashroe: Yes, I think someone cracked them around the head and reminded them to get on with it. Which is good.]
[Sianor: They have a panel. You know.]
[Ashroe: The place of a thousand dreams and a further thousand dollars just to get a ticket? Yeah, I heard.]
[Sianor: :( :( :(]
[Ashroe: I'm in two minds about if I'd enjoy such a big, sprawling convention. On the one hand: it's got everything I love!]
[Sianor: And on the other?]
[Ashroe: It's got everything I love. At the same time. I wouldn't fit it all in, and I'd probably miss the best parts.]
[Sianor: I think I'd still go. You can get the interviews and videos and gifs after the event.]
[Ashroe: Maybe next year, then. Since the economy collapsed, there haven't been all that many over this side of the pond. Used to be a huge money sink for me.]
[Sianor: !!!!]
[Ashroe: What?]
[Sianor: You might come to my neck of the woods!]
[Ashroe: Yes, I might. I do leave the fair and sceptred isle sometimes, you know.]
[Sianor: If... if it's still going next year...]
[Ashroe: Okay. If it's still going next year, and still has a panel... yes. I'll come.]
[Sianor: OMG.]
[Ashroe: Will you make it?]
[Sianor: I'll make sure I make it. I can afford it, I just... never wanted to go alone.]
[Ashroe: Well you don't have to, then.]
[Sianor: Do we get to share a room?]
[Ashroe: I snore.]
[Sianor: I don't mind.]
[Ashroe: ...sure. Why not.]
[Sianor: I am beyond excited.]
[Ashroe: I'm going to regret this somehow, aren't I?]
[Sianor: NO!]
***
"There's no need for us all to be here," Vadim said. "So... scram. Go on."
"But, Captain--"
"Twinkle wants to traipse around the fancy shops. My bridge crew have suddenly decided that boxes are the most interesting things to ever exist, and that leaves you as a chaperone, Kre."
"But my father would--"
"...would have said if you had to be here to sign over some boring cargo, and he didn't. Don't make me order you to go. I'm a patient man, but there's only so many times I can look at cute things for that savage monster of a Ru and stay sane, so you're designated Biann-companion."
Kre cut a broad swipe through the air behind her with her tail. "Fine."
"It will be fun for you."
"Then why aren't you doing it?"
"I said 'for you'. I have the tolerance of a person allergic to pink and fluffy things. You're already fluffy, so you're half way home."
Kre's ears tilted back. "Sometimes you are unpleasant."
"Sometimes I breathe."
"Just because I am--"
Vadim grabbed a hold of her artificial mane, and pulled her to one side of the cargo hold. "Jokes aside for a minute... you need some space. You can see that, can't you?"
"I am fine."
"Kre, you're practically clawing through the floor. You're wound, and you're upset, and the best person in the world for dragging the unwilling out of their shells? Is Biann. She... she's been there for me, in the past. So believe me, I know. No matter how grumpy or sulky you get, she'll be there with a smile and a wink and she'll bubble away at you until you cheer the hell up."
That made the fur at the nape of Kre's neck stand erect, and a sort of... prickling sensation travel along her skin. "Captain, I--"
"Pretend. Pretend like you're pissed with me for ordering you off with her. Yell at me, curse at me, but go with her. And if it don't work, you can blame me. And if it does... you can thank her."
"I... yes. I'm sorry." Her ears were still obviously sad, her whole demeanour subdued (and vaguely frustrated).
"Don't sweat it." Vadim pinched a handful of fur, and jostled. "Now go and get some atrocious, tacky souvenirs. The more disgusting the better. You can add to our collection of awful memories in the break room."
"So they are meant to be... unsettling?"
"I said nothing."
"I heard nothing, either."
"Good girl, Fluffy."
***
"Thanks for coming with me," Biann said, looping her arm through Kre's. "I know the Cap'n was pestering you. Sometimes he forgets I'm a full-grown woman, you know."
"I think he knows you better than you expect," was all Kre would say.
"I don't really need anything, though. I just mostly wanted to wander. I like seeing the different buildings, the outfits... hearing the accents, you know?"
"Yes. I did visit many places when I was still... when I still called myself Kre-Tho-Tiamet. But I was only ever taken to the nicer parts of the planets and cities we visited."
"Have you been to all the core home-worlds?"
"Yes, I have. Some only in passing, but I spent a long time on your species' home-world, Aniba. It was there that I met my mentor in the sciences."
"Really?"
"Yes: I had my own, Sianar tutors, but I would receive some tuition by other races to give me a more... rounded view of the world. Eru - my sister - and I spent a whole half-cycle on Annwin, and I became captivated by the way your species combines rhetoric and debate with rigorous scientific principles. It is a more... engaging method of learning."
"How do Sianar normally learn?"
"A lot of it is done by rote. You learn the major points of history, plus your physical exercises, by pure repetition. Our schools have become more metropolitan now, but the lingering traces of our old structure are there, and many of the teachers only begrudgingly vary their methods."
"Wow. I guess I never really thought anyone would be taught any other way."
"Most do not. I was unusually fortunate, because of my family's influence."
"So have you been here before? To Jazibe?"
"No. Well. Perhaps. If I did, it was a matter of moments for some official visit or another, but not an extended stay. They tend to... blur into one another."
"So... you like going around the seedy parts of town, and I like going around the rich parts." Biann beamed widely. "We'll split it. You show me all the fancy things when we walk around, and I'll find the most back-water, mucky parts of the city, and take you to a bar you won't want to sit down in."
"Is that--?"
"Wise? C'mon. It's Jazibe. Even the worst parts of this place are probably better than the best parts of where Loap grew up. He'd tell you that himself, you know."
"I know."
"Poor places first, so we're progressing through the social structure." She tugged at Kre's shoulder-ruff, pulling it slightly to one side, and then loosening some of her straps. "At least look a little down-trodden, or you'll be hassled for money."
"I bow to your superior knowledge," Kre said.
Begrudgingly, she had to admit that the Captain had been right. It was very difficult to stay depressed in Biann's presence, even if you tried.
***
[Ashroe: Don't judge me.]
[Sianor: Why? What's up babe?]
[Ashroe: I opened beer.]
[Sianor: Oh.]
[Ashroe: Bad day. Very bad day.]
[Sianor: Want to talk about it?]
[Ashroe: No. Yes. I don't know.]
[Sianor: Talk to Aunty Mandy.]
[Ashroe: Just... ugh. Three off sick. People yelling. People not aware that I can't do the work of four people. Obviously I went around and gave everyone flu.]
[Sianor: Well, you are a criminal mastermind, but I think you'd give people flu who wouldn't make your day terrible... by being off.]
[Ashroe: Exactly. That be evil genius. I mean, I am. The
other is evil moron.]
[Sianor: Well, you're home now.]
[Ashroe: Tomorrow work. Probably still people off.]
[Sianor: Can you maybe make a sign for your door? 'Go away, I'm busy overthrowing the status quo'?]
[Ashroe: Heh, yes. 'Fuck off, unless you're paid more than me. If you're paid more than me, fuck you.']
[Sianor: Just don't get the flu as well, OK? I don't think my immune system could cope.]
[Ashroe: Nah, I don't get sick much. Much. Should be fine.]
[Sianor: Wish I had your constitution :P]
[Ashroe: Sorry, was that insensitive?]
[Sianor: No, no, not at all. I've been much better recently. And if I got offended every time someone coughed, I'd burn myself out with righteous indignation.]