“That doesn’t sound like I have much of a choice now?” Liam says.
“Yes, you do,” Sebastian says. “We will still help you one way or the other. If we can guarantee your safety during the full moon cycle she may change her mind. You will have a choice.”
“I may not want one,” Liam says.
“That is your choice too,” Helena says. “The Queen is definitely pro-vampire, but even she is having a difficult time with Lily’s condition. What we really need is a cure or tonic to mitigate the effects during that time of the month.”
“Julian’s work and your experience inspire great hope. We will all help in any way we can,” Aidan says.
“I’m using all my academic contacts abroad to help me with this as well. They are invested in a solution because with Lily’s infection, they realize they are at risk. We’ll find an answer,” Julian says.
I never considered the possibility that the Queen would have me killed—the merciless bitch. Just add that to the worries I have. Relationship issues, she-wolf in my future and now I may have to check my back for an assassin. I glance at Bast and he is watching—his expression fierce. I know he is just as worried as I am. I look at Aidan. He stares at me ready to take me away and not tell anyone where we’re going. I have to say it is tempting. I reach for my sanitizer.
“I know what you are thinking, Lilith. I will not let it happen. I will take you away before they touch a hair on your head,” Aidan says, confirming my suspicions.
“Lily, they will have to kill me first. I would let Aidan take you if I thought that was the only way. I will not let them harm you,” Sebastian envelops me in his strong arms. His kisses draw me from my internal monologue.
“Both of you, thank you. I think that it will all come down to what happens at the full moon. I wish we could see into the future. So much depends on this. I’m going to be a nervous wreck.”
“Shhh, Cherie, don’t worry about it tonight.” Sebastian hugs me. “We destroyed the one who caused this. We will figure out the rest as we go.” I lay my head on his chest and let him hold me. I welcome the reassurance. I glance down at the tranced out Celine.
“Ahh, yes, what to do with Celine?” Helena says.
“I can take her back to Zoe’s,” Aidan says.
“I think that would be best. She has been a pain in the ass for the most part. Just pop her outside the front door and pop back, Aidan. Don’t linger. I don’t want Zoe to get a chance to question you about any of this.”
“Your wish is my command, Milady,” Aidan says with a mock salute. He takes Celine’s hand and pops out. He is back in a matter of seconds.
“She didn’t even know we landed. I saw Gabrielle run over to take care of her.”
“Gabrielle?” I ask.
“She’s one of Zoe’s flunkies. We met her briefly at court, love,” Aidan answers me.
“I have to admit I’m a little scared,” Liam says. “Do you think they will send someone to take me out during the month without you guys knowing about it?”
“No, I don’t think that. Zoe keeps her word,” Helena says, but her brow wrinkles again. She shakes her head like she’s shaking a thought away. “I do think that it would be better for you to stay with us if you are comfortable with that. We can all keep an eye on each other. Julian can take notes on the changes that take place for you and Lily as the month progresses and you won’t be in your condo, alone and worried.” She rubs his arm.
“I don’t know what to say. Part of me wants to stay with you, the part of me that is terrified. The other part of me doesn’t want to impose.”
“It’s no imposition, Liam, really,” I jump in. “I’d like to have the company and I know Andrew would, too.”
“Then, yes,” he says taking Helena’s hand. “Thank you. I accept your generous invitation.”
“Excellent, this will make it easier to observe when your change begins to come on as well. You can also get to know us and what it would be like to be vampire,” Sebastian says. “Julian is a renowned scholar and can teach you a great deal this month so you can make an educated decision.”
“I appreciate that. I’m desperate right now but I would like the chance to catch my breath and think about my options. Let my lawyer skills kick in.” He laughs.
“You will be given that chance, my new friend,” Sebastian says.
With Liam in the guest room, I’m not going to have a backup place to sleep anymore. I better make sure that Bast and I do our fighting before I get ready for bed. Hopefully we won’t be fighting like we have been. I think we worked through some things. Aidan will always be a sore spot—but maybe not as much. Didn’t Bast just say he would send me away with Aidan if he thought that would keep me safe? I can’t believe he is willing to put his fears and dislike of Aidan behind him to ensure my safety.
When Andrew and Liam leave to get the things Liam will need for a longer stay, Aidan and I add a few things we think will make his stay more comfortable. It is handy to have a jinni who can summon anything you can think of. We have so much fun, it feels good. Aidan shows off changing the throw pillows to different colors until I decide which color I want, when Sebastian walks in. He scowls. I squelch my giggles but Aidan keeps his huge grin. It is infectious and I can’t help mirroring him.
“Looks good in here, Lily. You have impeccable taste as always,” Sebastian says as he kisses me possessively on the lips.
“Thank you, Bast. It makes it easy when you have the world at your fingertips,” I say pointing to Aidan.
Aidan bows and Sebastian snorts.
“I can’t give you the world, Cherie. I’m sorry,” Sebastian says grumpily.
“I only need you, sweetheart,” I say kissing him.
I hug Sebastian and wink at Aidan who blows me a kiss.
I’m not sure why I wink. I think I want to tell Aidan that he’s important to me too and that while I love Sebastian, I care for him too. Danger Will Robinson. This is not a good sign. I think Bast and I need some alone time. I have been spending too much time with Aidan. He’s so deliciously dangerous. Yummy. Snap out of it Lily. Yikes.
Aidan pops out of the room and Sebastian moves his arms down my back. His hands slide over every inch of me and soon I’m reciprocating. I say his name into his ear following it by a little lick.
“Lily,” he says in a ragged breath. “I want you.”
“I want you too, Bast. Why don’t we go to our room and you can show me how much.”
Sebastian picks me up and I wrap my legs around him. Before we have the time to leave the room Liam and Andrew walk in.
“Uh hmmm,” Andrew clears his throat.
“I’m so sorry,” Liam says while he blushes three shades of red.
“No, we’re sorry, Liam. This is your room,” Sebastian laughs. “Lily just got done adding some last minute touches to it to make you a bit more comfortable.” Andrew raises a brow and pointedly looks around.
“Aidan helped me,” I blurt.
“I love what you’ve done with it! An iPod and stereo, Plasma TV, laptop, all the color accents.” Liam is delighted. “This was too much. Thank you.”
“You are very welcome. It was my—our—pleasure and it was fun,” I say.
“You can redo my room any time you want, Miss Lily,” Andrew says a bit stiffly.
“Of course, Andrew. I’ll get Aidan and we’ll go do it right now. You can join us and tell us what you want.” It’s the least I can do. I flick my eyes to Sebastian—the rendezvous will have to wait—shopping is in order.
“I’m only letting you go because you have a chaperone. I plan on continuing where we left off later, Cherie,” Sebastian whispers in my ear and sucks on it, sending waves of pleasure straight to a certain lower region.
I wiggle as I slip down his body sending more waves of pleasure through me. I can see it has the same effect on Bast and I smile archly.
Liam accompanies Andrew and me. He’s curious about how Aidan summons objects. Aidan is in the
library with Julian, chatting about Voogle.
“Aidan, my dear, would you be willing to help me spruce up Andrew’s room the way we did Liam’s?”
“Anything for you, love.”
Liam and Andrew give each other knowing looks and Julian shakes his head, but smiles indulgently at Aidan. Thank goodness Sebastian isn’t downstairs. He doesn’t need any more fuel for his fire.
Andrew has no hesitation about showing us to his room and pointing out its inadequecies. He, of course, wants a new computer, Plasma TV and iPod stereo. Surprisingly, he has a penchant for gold lamé and purple. What can I say, his taste is all in his mouth. He and Liam have such fun with Aidan. I just stand back and enjoy. Aidan loves to show off and feeds off their energies. We make so much noise that Helena and Julian investigate. The mood catches and they join in. Aidan changes Andrew’s clothes. He puts him in a swimsuit, then a leotard, then a toga. Andrew’s face is expressive, totally transparent. We’re helpless, bent-over, gasping for breath. Sebastian enters in time to see Andrew in his leotard and tutu. I think the laughter has a healing effect on Liam. I don’t think he’s spent much time laughing these past two months. The tension around his eyes eases.
Finally Andrew decides he has had enough of being a guinea pig and tells Aidan in no uncertain terms that he had better put him to rights. Aidan leaves him in a beautiful Dolce & Gabbana suit. Andrew’s eyes are as big as dinner plates. He thanks Aidan effusively. Aidan brushes it off. He’s fed off the energies in the room, so he has had a good return from the little adventure. I catch Aidan’s eye and he winks at me. I smile back at him.
We leave Liam and Andrew to play with Andrew’s new toys. Helena and Julian retire upstairs to have a little private time. Sebastian kisses me goodbye as he leaves for the club. That leaves Aidan and me in an uncomfortable silence.
“Let’s go sit in the library,” I suggest.
“I’ll make you some coffee, love.”
“Thanks, Aidan. It was really sweet of you to do all that for Andrew and Liam.”
“Liam didn’t deserve his condition, much like you, love, and I like Andrew. He takes care of you and that is important to me,” he says simply.
His honesty and generosity makes me feel humble.
I sip my coffee in silence and Aidan sits next to me.
“Lilith, I have had so much fun today being with you. You have brought so much pleasure into my life in the past few days.”
“Your friendship means the world to me too, Aidan.”
“You know you don’t have to worry about the future. I will keep you safe. I won’t let anyone hurt you. I’m sorry I wasn’t fast enough the other night. It’s my fault that this happened to you.” I’m surprised. Aidan has often been a detached bystander, always a trickster, but I’ve seldom ifr ever, seen him feel guilt. I look into his eyes and see the shifting sands… He is growing up—if a djinn can emotionally mature.
“No, Aidan. You couldn’t have known.” I touch the side of his face trying to rub away the worry. “You were doing what you were supposed to be doing. You saved my life. You helped us find Liam and you found and took care of that Antoine.” I am reminded of what we still face. “In my eyes, there is nothing you need to repair.”
“I will do everything in my power to keep you safe.” He takes my hand and I see a glimpse of the fire that is his spirit. “I love you. My soul is entwined with yours.”
Oh boy.
“Aidan…”
“Shhh.”
He takes us to his flat in the blink of an eye and we are on his bed. He begins kissing me and I try and push him away but he gently persists.
“I can’t stand him touching you. I can’t stand listening to him making love to you. I need to embrace all of you, Lilith. Please let me.” He runs his hand gently down my face. “I’ve never been with a woman but I need to be with you, surrounding you, inside you.”
“Aidan I can’t. I would if I wasn’t with Sebastian, but I am. I love him.”
I gasp at his warm breath as he moves in between my breasts.
“I love you too, but I can’t, Aidan.”
“Let me make love to you.”
“I can’t. Not while I am with Sebastian.” My body turns traitor and shivers deliciously. Aidan wraps his arms around me and rubs my back. I gently pull back. “How would you feel if the tables were turned? It’s not right. I just can’t cheat on him. I love you, Aidan, I do.” I begin to cry.
“Shhh shhh, darling don’t cry. I’m sorry. I’ve put you in a terrible position.” He wraps me in his arms again and this time I let him hold me. “I love you more for being honest and true. I’ve never cared for a wit for a moral dilemma before. I don’t know what to do. I feel like I might explode with my love for you.” He lets go of me suddenly and jumps up and begins pacing. “Maybe I need to go away for a while. It didn’t work before. I just saw you in every woman I looked at.” He stops and kneels in front of me. “I missed you so much, I ached.”
“What are we going to do then?”
“I don’t know. I can hardly go on like this. It’s killing me slowly. Do you really love Sebastian?”
“Yes, I do. That is what makes this so difficult. I don’t know how I can feel so much for two different men—two totally different men. It’s making me crazy.”
“Thank you for calling me a man.” He snorts, surprising himself. “Never thought I’d say that. I feel better knowing that you aren’t with him out a sense of obligation.” He sits next to me and envelops me again. “I would take you away right now if that was the case. I don’t want you to hurt and it would hurt you to leave him. Fuck!” He looks pained. He pulls at his hair and stands abruptly.
“Aidan, I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry for how you feel.” His handsome face is grim, lines bracket his eyes. “If I could change this situation, I would. I’ve tried. At first I pretended that I was just infatuated with you. That lasted about a day.” He laughs bitterly.
I trace the strong angles of his face again and he closes his eyes. Then he kisses the palm of my hand. This is so confusing.
Slowly he lets go of my hand and his eyes meet mine. His sigh is explosive.
“I suppose I need to get you back to the manse. They’re going to know you are missing soon and they’ll worry.”
“Yes. Sebastian will be back soon. He was only running some papers over to the club.”
“Then I better get you back right away. I don’t need him telling me I can’t see you again. The gods forbid,” he says as he rolls his eyes.
We take each other’s hands. He pops us into the kitchen where we are less likely to be observed. I straighten my clothing and hair just in time. Helena opens the swinging door and peeks in.
“There you are. We were looking for you two.”
“Oh, you found us,” I say squaring myself mentally.
“Yes, it seems I have,” she says. Her expression is a little too all-knowing for comfort. I don’t think I fool her for one minute. I’m certain all the despair I feel is plastered on my face.
“Aidan, will you excuse Lily and me for a minute?”
“Of course, Helena.” He looks miserable.
“Okay, Lily, spill your guts, because you look horrible and I had already looked in the kitchen and you weren’t here a minute ago.”
“Aidan popped us to his flat. He told me how much he loved me. Oh, Helena, I love Sebastian so much. I do, there is no doubt about that. But I feel so conflicted about my feelings for Aidan. He wants me. He’s tormented. He’s in pain. I told him that I would never cheat on Sebastian and that I loved Bast. He said he could hardly bear to watch Bast touch me but he can’t stand to be away from me. I care a great deal for Aidan. I love him in so many ways. God I am so fucked up,” I sob.
Helena gathers me up and holds me.
“I don’t know what to tell you, honey. This is truly a miserable situation. I love Sebastian like he was my brother and I would never tell you to hurt him. I don’t
think you want to do that.”
I shake my head.
“But your feelings for Aidan have to be validated. I know he’s in pain and his feelings are very real. It is an impossible situation. I don’t envy you. I suggest that once we get this werewolf thing straightened out and you know what will happen at the full moon, that you and Sebastian take some time and go somewhere for a while. Get away from Aidan. Give you both some space for awhile. I think that is the only thing that will help your situation. Then when you get back maybe you will have a better idea of what feels right for you.”
“I think you’re right. He says he just misses me when he is away, but I know it isn’t as raw as watching me and Bast together and it isn’t as difficult for me when I have some distance.”
“Exactly. Maybe South America? It’s lovely down there and Bast hasn’t been for quite a while. It will be good for him to practice his Spanish.” She gives me the once over. “Do you think you’re ready to join the rest of the family? Sebastian is bound to be wondering what is keeping us.”
I nod. “Let’s bring some wine in with us.”
“Good thinking. Do we have any strawberry? I had some at the Queen’s and now I have a taste for it.”
We dust off a bottle of strawberry wine from the back of Andrew’s stock. The glasses are gleaming and sorted by style, Andrew is so efficient. We add fruit for Liam and Andrew, placing it on a tray.
In the library, I am the center of attention. Aidan studies my face. Sebastian looks nervous. I pour wine for everyone and take a glass to Sebastian, sitting next to him. He searches my face trying to discern what has been going on. He can only tell that I’ve been crying. He slides his arm around me and takes a sip of his wine. Then he kisses me on the forehead. I sink into his chest and sigh. He feels comfortable and right. His cool body is familiar and belongs to me and I belong to him. Aidan turns away and I feel the regret that has become a constant companion.
Sucking Bites (San Francisco Vampires Series #3) Page 11