by K. M. Liss
I cried silently at what I'd done, tears streaming down my face. Tears of shame, disgust and regret.
He gulped loudly, his mouth hot on my neck. “That was completely amazing, Christ...” His fingers stroked my cheek. He raised his head on feeling the wetness there. “Hey... what's the matter, babe?”
He withdrew from me and picked me up, hugging me close.
But I didn't want to be hugged. I wanted him to vanish and to forget this terrible, shameful act I'd committed. I wanted to rewind time and to send him off home, before I lost the ability to defend myself against his well practiced charm.
I felt sick to the pit of my stomach that I'd succumbed so easily.
I pushed him away, scrambling around for my shorts, sobbing like crazy, as I put them on.
“You'd better go... you've got what you wanted...” I choked out.
“Didn't you?” he asked in a soft voice.
I faced up to him, looking into his eyes.
“I've been trying to tell you all evening to leave me alone.”
“Now hang on, girl. This ain't all my fault. You could have said no at any time if you felt things were movin' too fast. ”
He raked his hand through his hair, his expression dark and intense.
He reached out and touched my face, “You know I want to see you again, don't you?” His tone was reassuring, but I didn't want to hear. I wanted him gone.
“Well I don't want to see you...” I didn't care how rude I sounded. He deserved it.
It had to be the end. I wasn't getting any more involved with someone like him. Maybe I could get over this one mega mistake but I couldn't risk having anything more to do with him.
I wasn't going back to Riders bar ever again.
I wasn't seeing him ever again.
“Oh c'mon, babe,” He appealed, rubbing his jaw with his hand. “Don't jerk me around. I want a whole lot more than one hot fuck.”
“Well that's just tough. I'm not your kinda girl and you're not my kinda guy,” I insisted.
He snorted a laugh. “I gotta say, personally speaking, that's fucking hilarious.”
“Please go, Josh, I'm finding this whole thing difficult to cope with.”
He held his hands up.
“Okay, okay... I'll go for crissakes... but I'm picking you up at five on Sunday. We'll see how we go from there.”
With a fast, hard kiss, silencing the emphatic NO, which was about to emerge, he strode off around the corner of the house.
A few seconds later, his Harley started up and thrummed and rumbled on the driveway. Feeling shaky on my legs. I followed him round and watched him go.
He rolled back a little, as he maneuvered out of the confined space.
With a final glance over his shoulder, he caught me standing there.
For a moment we stared.
His face was full of hurt and confusion. And guilt.
Good... I hope he feels real fucking bad.
Then, with a quick rev, he shot off like a hound from hell was after him.
In five seconds, his red tail light disappeared from view as he turned right at the end of the street.
I stood rooted to the spot in a trance.
Now he'd gone, and I was calming down, I began to think more clearly.
I'd hit out at him, angrily, and defensively, but I'd only myself to blame.
I'd known all along what kind of guy he was; the kind to take advantage; the type to push until he got what he wanted; the type who knew he could have whoever he wanted.
Including me; someone so dead set against him.
I'd put myself in that situation. I'd let him disarm me way too easily. It was almost like I wanted him to. It wasn't his fault. It was mine.
Slowly, I went inside. I could feel his semen leaking out of me and I went into the downstairs bathroom to clean myself up.
I felt sore and used and absolutely disgusting, as well as stupid. I hoped and prayed nothing happened as a result of this. Not only had I had unprotected sex, I had no money for emergency contraception. Not a dime. My Mom was stony broke, like usual, so I couldn't beg a loan either.
I really needed to speak to Julia, to get some solid advice, but she was away for a week in Florida, with her boyfriend Mack. It was her first holiday with him and I didn't want to bother or worry her.
I couldn't tell my Mom. That was a big no.
I looked in the mirror, shocked at my appearance. My hair was in tangles; my cheeks were flushed bright pink and streaked with mascara, and my eyes looked huge and pained. I wiped my face, removing the worst of the ruined makeup with a damp tissue, and I ran my hands through my hair, taming it, making myself look and feel a little more decent.
Then I went into the kitchen and made some comforting hot chocolate to take to bed.
As I crept upstairs in the dark toward my bedroom, Mom appeared through her doorway. She looked like a ghostly angel in her white cotton nightgown; her curly fair hair like a halo around her head. She yawned as she stepped across the landing, en route to the bathroom.
“Hi, Mom.”
Her head turned rapidly, to the top of the stairs and she clutched her chest. “Tiff... you gave me a real start, hon,” she muttered.
“Sorry.”
“You just got in?”
“Yeah.”
“Philipa's been sick this evening. We didn't get to bed till eleven.” She yawned again, covering her mouth with her hand.
“Why was she sick?”
“She had another bad headache.”
“That's the second episode in a week. It could be migraine, you need to get her checked out.”
“I know I do, but I've been so busy, working double shift for the last fortnight, I haven't had time. I'll take her to the doctor on Monday.”
I kissed her on the cheek as I passed her by.
“'Night, mom.”
“Night love.”
I crept quietly inside the room I shared with my thirteen year old sister Philipa. She had Down's syndrome. I stood at her bedside and gazed upon on her innocent little face as she slept. Her arm was locked tightly around her pink teddy bear's neck. She was the sweetest thing on this earth. Mom and I both doted on her.
As I sat on the bed, unlacing my converse trainers and undressing, I could smell him. Not just between my legs, but all over me. I needed a bath, but it was too late. A mouthful of saliva pooled and I swallowed in disgust. I lay down and the cool sheets settled around my naked body, caressing my skin, reminding me of his touch.
I ached inside, remembering how he'd felt. How I'd felt. Every wild second was beyond words. I may be regretting it, but I couldn't deny enjoying it. I'd wanted and loved every second he was inside me. My whole body flamed and my sex tightened hard.
That made me even sicker.
I cried myself to sleep, my heaving sobs absorbed by the pillow.
How I hated what I'd done.
I hated myself, and my God, I hated Joshua Lyle for making me want him so much.
Part two coming soon.... ;)
My Thanks To You
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Kat
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About the Author
I'm a loveaholic, but not only that, I like intrigue and drama. My reading interests are spread across several genres. Romance, Paranormal, Sci fi, Fantasy, Horror and Erotica.
I read constantly, developing my craft and pushing myself to improve and to be a better writer. I love to create real people. People you may find in everyday life. But these people have secrets, hidden depths, torture, and a wealth of other hidden characteristics to their personality and in their lives. I love to create steamy passion, a heated encounter that will make you wish it were you. :) And I love to weave a spell, to captivate and entrance you with my words. To take you to another place in your life, where you can escape for a few hours with me.
I'm a mother of four, and worked for many years in a bank, monitoring trading room activities and risk control. You'll see a brief insight in my world in my novel, Hot Options. There's reality in that book! It's a New York trader erotic romance which I hope you'll love.
Many years commuting by train to London gave me ample opportunity to read many, many books and I appreciate a good story. I hope I can continue to create them for you.
In my spare (lol) time I love to watch movies, cook for my family and wander through the countryside which surrounds my home, pondering my plots and characters. I enjoy a glass of red wine, completely love chocolate and am obsessed with spicy food. My husband and I have been together for many years and have a shared love of reading. He is an inspiration. My whole family are an inspiration. There's always drama in my house, one way or another!
Join me on Facebook or Twitter.
I'd love to meet you.
Katrina.
***
Book List
More Erotic Romance (18+)
by Katrina Liss (K.M.Liss)
SERIES
Dr Sex Series
Therapy (I) ** FREE at SW and other digital book stores
Consort (II)
Falling (III)
Move Me – 2 Part
Moved (I) ** FREE at SW and other digital book stores
Shaken (II)
Riders
The Road To Ruin
NOVELS
White Tease
Two Can Play
Tied & Bound
Hot Options
Whirl
62 Days
SHORT STORIES
Liss Erotic Shorts (4000 -10000 words)
Short Blasts of Steam - 18 +
Destiny FREE! exclusive for my subscribers
Lord of My Heart
Nephrim
Venus, Mars & Us * FREE at SW and other digital book stores
Wild for This – Super HOT
A Private Meeting Super HOT
Dare - * FREE at SW and other digital book stores
Feel – Dare 2 * FREE at SW and other digital book stores
Tempted - * FREE at SW and other digital book stores
Savior - * FREE at SW and other digital book stores
I also write under pen name Jessica Miles (Jessie M) in the paranormal romance genre.