by L. C. Davis
As I listened to him, I found myself ignoring all the reservations and red flags that sprang up. This was everything I’d never even dared to want since I’d woken up on the other side of death, everything I never would have thought possible. “There’s a price,” I murmured. “There’s always a price when it comes to demons.”
“There’s a price for everything. We’ve spent this last year paying the price for the mistake I’m going to make tonight,” he said, his gaze full of determination. When he looked like this, when he talked like this, I could see why Nick had fallen for him so easily. He was small, easily half my weight, but the stuff Holden was made of was so much stronger than the stuff that barely kept me together most days.
“I don’t know…”
“Please.” He squeezed my hand. “It’s not just for you and me, it’s for Nick, too. He’s lost so much because of me, and you were willing to lose your soul to protect him. I know you love him.” The way he said it sent a surge of panic through me. In that moment, I knew that Asher was right. My obsession was obvious to everyone other than the object of it, but Holden didn’t seem angry or hurt as he looked into my eyes, just hopeful. “I know you’d do anything for him, and you know the pain he’s gone through, the hurt he keeps even from me. We actually have a chance to do that for him, but I can’t take it without you. Will you help me, Daniel? Will you help me put this right?”
It was wrong. I knew it on some deep, instinctive level that defied the logic and reason I’d clung to all my life, but Holden’s words were as seductive as Locke’s promises ever had been. I wasn’t sure exactly what the Whore of Babylon was supposed to do, but he’d make one hell of a demon. “Okay.” The words grated on their way out of my throat, as if even my body was aware that I was making a mistake and trying to stop me.
Holden’s relief was visible, but it turned to curiosity as he looked down at my hand in his. He reached out and pressed a hand to my chest, his eyes widening. “You’re still alive. Your heart’s beating faster.”
I stopped. I listened. So it was.
A smile crossed Holden’s lips, but something kept me from returning it. A strange feeling, maybe dread. “Let’s go,” he said softly. “We’ve got mistakes to fix.”
Eighteen
HOLDEN
The equinox festival was in full swing by the time Daniel and I arrived. To my immense relief, there was no sign of the old us. The adoption booth was still set up, but evidently Carla had roped in a last-minute volunteer who’d actually bothered to get a good tablecloth.
“Where are we?” Daniel asked, watching the booth and looking like he was on the verge of getting sick.
“I don’t know, Locke’s homeschooling curriculum hasn’t gotten to time travel yet,” I said flatly. “When Lilith sent us back, I think we replaced the other us.”
“This can’t be good.”
“Come on, we need to get out of here before Carla sees us.”
“Where are we going?”
I swallowed hard. Now that I knew it really was the night of the festival, I also knew what I had to do. “I have to find Nick.”
“It’s a full moon, he’s probably already running around in the woods.”
“I know.”
“With Brent and the rest of the pack.”
I winced. “That’s part of the plan.”
“Holden, what are you going to do?”
“Brent only went after me because he was afraid Nick would mark me. If there’s no connection between me and Nick, Brent won’t have any reason to kill me and Nick won’t have any reason to get involved with Locke. He’ll find another Alpha for the ritual.”
“Nick imprinted on you!” Daniel hissed, stopping at the edge of the forest.
“He already keeps me at arm’s length,” I murmured. “This way, it’ll be even easier. And he’ll still have his brother. I’m sure I can find a way to release him eventually, but right now, that’s all I can do.”
“This is wrong.”
“So is letting things end up the same way. Between the two evils, I’m just picking the one we can all live with. Besides,” I said with a small smile, “if Nick’s not biochemically attached to me, maybe he’ll have an easier time sorting out his more human feelings.”
Daniel set his jaw, watching me like he wanted to argue. “Let’s just focus on keeping you away from Locke and keeping Brent away from you,” he muttered.
I nodded, walking into the cover of the forest. We still had a full night before the festival was over and I headed in the direction of the Whitaker estate, figuring that at least one of the guard dogs would come to greet us before we made it to the front door.
I was right. Something rustled in the trees and two massive yet quadrupedal wolves crept out on either side, hemming us in. Neither of them were Alphas, and there was something familiar in the lighter one’s eyes -- he had to be Cam. I could only hope the other wasn’t Brent. “Cam?” I asked hopefully.
The wolf started, his ears flat against his head. He looked to his companion for guidance. I must have guessed right. The larger, darker wolf crept forward, his eyes darting between me and Daniel. I gulped and tried to keep my wariness at bay. “Lowell?” There was no change in his golden gaze, until I ventured, “Allen?”
The wolf raised his head and watched me curiously for a moment before he shifted into his human form. “So, you’re not even trying to pretend like you’re human anymore,” Allen said with a dry laugh. “You’ve got balls coming onto Whitaker land without your demon.”
“He’s not my demon,” I said firmly. Not yet. “I’m an independent contractor, and I plan to stay that way.”
“And him?” Allen nodded to Daniel. “I defended Nick when the others were worried you guys were too close, that he’d spill the family secrets. Looks like I was wrong.”
“He didn’t tell me anything,” Daniel said in a sullen tone.
“You don’t have anything to worry about from Daniel,” I said, holding Allen’s gaze. It was the safest bet, since he was completely naked. “I need to talk to your Alpha. It’s urgent.”
Daniel watched me in confusion. I was already deviating from what he’d assumed the plan would be, but I hadn’t actually lied to him and by the time he figured out what I was doing, it would be too late for him to stop me. Locke really was rubbing off on me.
“What business do you have with my uncle?” Allen asked, folding his arms.
“Tell him I know about the contract Herschel made with Locke and I know a way out of it, but it’s time sensitive.”
That piqued his interest. Daniel was watching me just as closely and I could tell he was trying to figure out if I was bluffing or not. He was about to find out that I wasn’t. Allen nodded to Cam and the wolf shifted, casting a wary glance at me over his shoulder before he ran inside the house.
“For Nick’s sake, I hope this isn’t your idea of a joke,” Allen said. “He’s been on thin ice ever since you showed up.”
“Because you all think he imprinted on me,” I said with a wry smile.
The shock on Allen’s face made it clear he hadn’t expected me to come out and say it.
“He did, of course, but it wasn’t exactly organic. I’m kind of impressed with myself, to be honest. To be able to force something as complex as imprinting with magick?”
Allen’s eyes narrowed in barely contained rage. “I knew it,” he muttered. “You fucking --”
“Careful,” I said in a singsong. “You think me toying with your baby brother’s heart is bad? It’s nothing compared to what the demon Locke is going to do to him if your uncle doesn’t follow my advice to the letter.”
“Holden,” Daniel warned, obviously as confused as he was scared.
“Is that a threat?” Allen growled.
“It’s a warning. Your ancestors made a deal with the devil. Did you really think he wouldn’t come calling eventually?”
“And what was Nick to you? A toy?” he demanded.
“For a time
, but I’m bored now, so you can have him back.”
“And what’s your role in this?” Allen asked, glowering at Daniel like he was ready to rip him apart, fangs or no fangs.
Before Daniel could answer, I broke in with, “He started stalking me, since he’s hopelessly in love with Nick,” I sneered.
“Holden!”
“I’m sorry, but I doubt this comes as any surprise to Allen.” The look on the werewolf’s face only confirmed it. “Anyway, Daniel has become a royal pain in my ass ever since I came here and he got a bit too close to the truth playing private security for your brother, so I’m going to let your uncle decide what to do with him.”
Cam appeared at the door, fully dressed. “Uncle Luke says to bring them up,” he said, watching me with huge, worried eyes.
Allen muttered something unintelligible under his breath and shot me a dirty look before motioning for us to follow him inside. Before I could reach the first step, Daniel grabbed me by the arm. “What the fuck are you doing?” he hissed.
“Setting you up for a better year,” I said, pulling away from him to follow Allen inside. Cam followed at the rear as Allen led us into the foyer and up the massive staircase. It seemed like forever since my less-than-pleasant encounter with Daniel at Carla’s mixer. This would be only the second time I had actively spoken with Lucas Whitaker, and as Allen opened the door to a stately office and the mayor rose from behind a solid oak desk, the Alpha was every bit as intimidating as he’d been the first time. He peered at me disapprovingly from behind his glasses and I found myself wondering if they were just for show.
“Holden. I have to say, I expected a confrontation at some point, but tonight wasn’t the night.”
“I know it’s rude to make demands of a werewolf on a full moon, but I’m on a bit of a time crunch myself,” I said with an apologetic smile.
Lucas looked at Daniel over my shoulder and his mouth set into a scolding frown. “I expected better from you, son. How’d you get yourself wrapped up with him?”
“Daniel was just trying to look out for Nick, but he has a way of getting himself involved in things that don’t concern him, doesn’t he?” I offered with a sigh. I could feel Daniel’s anger boiling, but hopefully he knew better than to call me out in front of someone who could easily tear us both apart, whether he was in his wolf form or not. Allen and Cam lingered in the room. Being alone with one werewolf was bad enough. Three was just a joke. If it came down to violence, it wouldn’t be a fight, it would be a snack.
“Allen says you have an offer to make,” Lucas said, finally returning his focus to me. “I suggest you make it in haste. I avoid shifting indoors, but I’ll be more than happy to make an exception for you.”
My fake smile strained. “I don’t mean you any harm, but that’s more than I can say for the others who will come here if tonight goes the way it’s supposed to.”
Lucas frowned. “I don’t appreciate cryptic remarks, Holden. If you have something to say, then say it.”
“One of your pack has been sniffing around and he’s put together a truth that seems to have eluded you,” I began. “You think I’m a common witch who made a deal with the same demon your ancestors sold you out to centuries ago for a plot of land, but I’m not. I’m the Whore of Babylon --”
“Holden,” Daniel snarled. I felt him move forward and waved my hand. A zipper formed at the edge of his lips, dragging from one corner to the other to seal them shut. His panicked shout was muffled as he groped his face.
“Like I said, a nuisance.” I turned back to Lucas. “You’ve heard of me, haven’t you?”
The alpha’s jaw was set in irritation, but there was curiosity in his gaze as he watched me. Cam was on his knees, trying to console Daniel, but he seemed too horrified to be of much comfort. “Of course I have. But you’re wrong about the legends. It wasn’t a demon my ancestor contracted with, it was --”
“An angel?” I laughed. “It’s cute that you think there’s enough of a difference for it to matter. Lucifer is an angel, and I can assure you, you don’t want to run into him in a dark alley. Or a quaint little town…”
“If you are who you say you are, why are you here? What do you want with my nephew?”
“At first? I just wanted to have a bit of fun,” I said, running my hand along the edge of the desk. If I had to play the Whore, Locke was the best inspiration I could think of. I flopped into the chair across from Lucas’ desk and gave him my best smile. “The straight ones are always more fun. As for why I’m here, Stillwater is a sanctuary and I needed somewhere to catch my breath. Running from Michael and Lucifer gets tiring. Think of home base in a game of tag.”
“And Locke?”
“A minor player trying to work his way in to be the middleman, but he has his uses. There’s this ritual that has to take place for me to reach my full potential. First there’s me, the virgin sacrifice. Then there are my seven concubines, lovers, soulmates, whatever you want to call it,” I said with a dismissive wave. “One of them has to be an Alpha.”
“Nick,” Lucas growled.
Daniel’s eyes shone with confusion as he watched me. I eased my guilt by reminding myself that his confusion and his suffering on my behalf would soon be coming to an end. So would Nick’s. This was the only way I could protect them. “That was the plan,” I admitted. “Daniel was going to die tonight. He’d be the undead.”
Lucas eyed the vet warily and Cam backed off from him. Daniel’s mouth was still sealed but it seemed he had remembered how to breathe through his nose, and he was far more furious than panicked at the moment.
“What changed?” Lucas asked calmly. Too calm.
I frowned. The truth tasted strange on the tip of my tongue. I was so used to lying, it was a foreign and almost unappetizing flavor. “An angel contacted me,” I murmured. “He threatened someone I care very much for. Family. I’m sure you can understand how far even a monster is willing to go for his family, Mayor Whitaker.”
“I do,” he said, his tone gruff as he watched me. “What do you want from me?”
“I want you to call off your dogs. Brent figured out who I am, and he’s going to try to kill me tonight to protect Nick. The truth is, Nick and you will be free from Locke’s influence and mine once I leave, but I need you to guarantee my safe passage.”
“Your safe passage to where?” he demanded.
“There’s a spot in the forest. It’s astrologically perfect for a certain ritual,” I murmured. “Something tells me I’ll get a better signal to Heaven there.”
“You’re turning yourself in,” said Lucas.
Daniel let out a muffled cry of protest, but I ignored him. “I am. I’m the only reason Locke has any interest in your town. If I’m in Heaven’s custody, the contract Herschel made with him is meaningless.”
There was a strange look in Lucas’ eyes. Curiosity, but something else, too. “Locke isn’t the one who made the deal with Herschel. I told you, it was an angel.”
“I’m sure that’s what he told Herschel he was.”
“No,” he insisted, slipping a key out of his pocket. He unlocked his desk drawer and pulled out a small book bound in worn brown leather. My eyes widened and even Daniel seemed shocked.
“The Marrin family journal,” I whispered. “Where did you get it? The house is warded against your kind.”
A knowing smile crossed the Alpha’s lips as he held up the journal. “Did you really think I’d let a book that tells all my family secrets sit in a box in some old woman’s attic?”
“But how --?”
“Nick helped Daniel move years ago, before he’d gone through his first shift,” he said with a shrug. “The ward didn’t work on him then. I saw the opportunity and I took it. I didn’t know telling him to get close would become such an inconvenience in the future,” he said, frowning.
I could see the hurt in Daniel’s eyes. It rose off of him like smoke, but there was nothing I could do to make that revelation any less painful for h
im. However their friendship had begun, it had certainly become about more than Nick being used by his uncle to get something the pack wanted. I knew Daniel would see that once the pain wore off. They needed each other, he and Nick. I could only hope Nick would see that clearly once I was gone.
“May I see it?” I asked, holding out my hand.
Lucas seemed to hesitate for a moment before he passed me the book. I leafed through the thick, yellowed pages, laughing softly as a recipe for a cure-all bled into runic symbols and then into frenzied journal entries tinged with bitter recollections of what the Whitakers had done. The new settlers were far from welcomed by the Marrins. They had brought an angel with them, and Prudence Marrin knew the truth all too well. It was the first entry that caught my attention, written in sloppy, angry script.
November 11, 1510
The European mongrels have gone back on their word in record time. The first beams of wood went up for their ‘temporary encampment’ today. I expect it will be another month before Whitaker’s Wood proper is erected. Damn these dogs and damn the devil who leads them. Calls himself an angel--Adam, no less! Samael’s more like. Those empty blue eyes, windows for the devil himself. I pray the spirits will keep us. I pray Nana’s wards will hold. I pray the devil leaves these fools before their contract opens the gate to Hell itself on my father’s land.
“Adam,” I murmured, running my finger over the words on the page. When I looked up, Lucas was staring at me, studying my reaction. “Adam is the angel Herschel made a deal with?”
“And his bloodline has been paying the price ever since,” he said coldly. “Wolves are born and bred to hunt monsters. Do you know what it’s like to be bound as a gatekeeper, a protector of the very things thousands upon thousands of years of evolution have engineered you to kill?”
“Why do you do it? Why keep Herschel’s promise?”
“Read the next entry.”
I turned the page, but it took rifling through ten pages of recipes and spells to find another entry.
January 17, 1511
I went down by the river to do the washing today, near the spot where Nana and I used to pick wildflowers. I saw Herschel Whitaker with the devil. They were talking in whispers but they didn’t see me, so I hid in the bushes and listened. Herschel was upset. Adam said it was a small price to pay for freedom. For a home. His children would live long, prosperous lives free from the Queen’s huntsmen and all it would cost him was a direct descendant, an Alpha like Herschel. I guess that’s what the dogs call the cursed among the damned, the ones who lead them.