by Liz Crowe
“No begging necessary.” Her hipbones banged against the countertop edge. “Won’t last long.” He gave a hard thrust before draping over her, hips moving, their torsos slick with sweat.
She smiled and rested her burning hot face on the cool stainless steel. He pulled her up, their bodies still connected and kissed her shoulder once, twice, and again. She had a moment of unreality—this moment with a man who, for all intents and purposes, represented the sort of perfection she’d always wanted.
“I love you,” he whispered. “So much.”
She opened her mouth to reply, but the words died on her tongue. When she refocused forward, she spotted Dominic, dressed for his job as foreman on their barn renovation, standing at the bottom of the steps glaring at them. She smiled at him, and put her hands over Lee’s that currently cupped her bare breasts then slid them up and around to grip his neck behind her so Dom could see every inch of what they’d been doing.
She turned then, kissing Lee and getting dizzy, and a touch sad when she realized the satisfaction didn’t come from kissing him but from showing him off to Dominic. Unfair. When she disengaged and looked to the space where Dom had been witnessing her post-coital snuggle session, it was empty.
“Kind of a slut move, eh, Di?”
She wiped the sweat off her brow. “Be quiet and help me with this.”
Dom grabbed the other end of the dead buck and they tossed it into the ’gator wagon. “Drive it over to the new barn site. I can’t dress it here.” She gestured at the old barn, now a mess of drywall, electrical supplies and crap she hated. They’d raised the new barn first, and it sat, cold and sterile, sans any personality whatsoever. But they’d moved the livestock there, so the animals wouldn’t be unnerved by the chaos in their old homestead.
Hadn’t worked out all that well. The goat’s milk had dried up so Lee had to find a new female with a couple of kids, claiming that Diana’s goat would sense competition and start producing again. So far that theory hadn’t worked either, so she’d been forced to take the mama goat’s milk.
Masie’s calf, a female, was a delightful thing and too smart for her own good. She’d figured out how to jimmy open the new gate latch within days, so they’d looked up one morning to find Masie Jr. calmly nibbling at the lawn. A new latch had proven no problem, sending them to fetch her from the neighbor’s yard, nearly four miles down Yellowbird Road.
Dom jumped behind the wheel while she gathered up her deer-cleaning equipment. “I guess you’d know, wouldn’t you.” She settled into the passenger’s seat.
“Huh?” He floored it across the field. She gripped the dash and set her jaw.
“The slut move. It’s your specialty. I learned from the best.”
He grunted, and pulled up outside the new barn’s main door. They heaved the huge carcass out and onto the concrete pad, then he helped her string it up by its hind legs in the doorway. A few hours of bloody, back-breaking work later, she had the skin drying on a rack and the various cuts of venison separated by their final destination—tenderloins headed to the smoker, chops and roasts to the huge freezer.
“I gotta give ya that one. It was some show,” Dom eventually admitted as they hosed down the concrete, diluting the blood and sending it down the specially installed drains.
She ignored him, not even sure what she should say. It had been indeed, and she’d loved every second of it.
“It really was none of your business,” she said, finally dropping into a canvas camp chair. Her every bone and sinew quivered from the exertion and her heart pounded way too fast for her taste at his proximity. Damn the man. How she couldn’t just purge him with Lee Tolliver’s presence escaped her understanding.
You could start with kicking him out of your house, stupid.
She shook her head, unwilling to think about that.
“Guess it kinda was, since y’all were going at it like animals in clear view of God ‘n’ everybody, you know, in the kitchen?”
Dom popped open a can of beer and tossed one to her. She caught it, opened it and took a drink, then smiled at him. “Nice work.”
He shrugged and smacked his lips, frowning down at the can.
Mama Brantley’s Secret Recipe was on the simple label, and it contained a sublime, Kombucha-style brew that he’d concocted using her mama’s original Scoby and combining it with a ton of peaches and a mild red ale. The resulting liquid he’d contracted through a start-up brewery in Lexington, and had canned instead of bottled thanks to a mobile canning operation that had approached him about doing the same for Love Brewing products. The first batch had flown off local store shelves and he’d convinced Dale and Jen to convert part of the building behind them into a small brewing facility.
She still wasn’t quite sure how the whole thing had transpired right under her unwilling nose.
“Too acidic,” he declared, as he poured the stuff out onto the blood-stained dirt. She shook her head and drank the rest of hers. He stayed silent, gaze on her, Diana knew, but she kept hers averted.
“So you gonna marry Doctor Horse?”
“His name is Lee. And since he hasn’t asked me to, I’m guessing no.”
“Living in sin.” He made a tsking noise with his teeth.
“Go to hell,” she muttered, getting slowly to her feet, her muscles and tendons creaking and groaning in protest.
“I think I’ve mentioned this, but I’m already there, thanks.”
“Angelique is coming to dinner. Your folks are fighting again and she can’t stand it.”
“She needs to get her ass back up to that dance school.” Dom lifted his face up, taking a long breath of the winter night. “Gonna snow. I can smell it.”
“You sense the weather now. Quite the Renaissance man.”
He stepped in front of her before she could head into the barn and finish cleaning up.
“Excuse me.” She refused to meet his eyes. His fingers encircled her upper arms, moved over her sweatshirt-clad shoulders and up to her neck. “Don’t touch me.” She glared at him.
“I have to say something.” His familiar voice hypnotized, despite her efforts not to acknowledge it. His lips hovered over hers.
“This has to be the grossest moment ever.” She kept her shaking arms at her sides.
“What can I say, animal blood in your hair makes me horny.” He smiled and kissed her gently before letting her go. “I don’t deserve you. He does. I want you to be happy. There I said it.”
She frowned at him, conscious of her tingling nerve endings. “That’s it?”
“Well, yeah, what did you expect?” One corner of his full lips lifted. Her pulse quickened. She swallowed hard, not allowing the reply she wanted to let fly escape her lips.
“Nothing.” She folded up the chair and tucked it into a corner. “I’m gonna check on the goats.”
“Diana, wait.”
She couldn’t bring herself to turn and face him.
“I mean it. I thought for a second that we could, you know, be together, but I don’t want to hurt you, and since that’s the only thing on my record so far, I think you’re doing the right thing.”
She clenched her fingers into fists and kept her gaze toward the giant pen holding her somewhat-overwhelming herd of cheese producers.
Dominic’s voice filled her brain like a fog, disorienting her with his surprising, mature words. “I am sorry about your first husband too, Di. I heard all about it thanks to my nosy brothers. He was a prick…lied…to you….” He frowned and looked back up at the sky.
“Yeah, could be describing yourself, eh?” She moved away when he reached for her. “It’s fine. He was a rebound for me, I guess. Something else I can blame you for, were I seeking something else.”
“But he took your parents’ insurance money.” His fists were balled up, like he wanted to pound something. “Told you he wanted to open your dream restaurant or something. That’s…just….”
“That’s just my business, Dom. Something else in t
he Diana-gets-screwed-yet-lives-and-learns column.” She shut her mind to it, shoving it far, far away and focusing on the mess she was in now as opposed to the mess a couple of years ago. “What about Kent? I know you’re still not using your mobile phone. Angelique told me last time she was out here trying to escape the sound of your parents fighting about you. How is he gonna—”
“In the recent words of a friend of mine,” he interrupted. “None of your damn business.”
He stood there, miserable she knew, but Diana held back, unwilling to allow anything like pity to enter her mind. “Okay, fine. But he cost you a relationship with your daddy. Don’t you think you owe it to yourself to figure out if it’s really what you want?”
“I don’t,” Dom insisted through clenched teeth, fiddling with the cooler. “And don’t bring it up again. It was a…fluke. A whim, and a giant mistake. Sort of like Gina.”
Diana flinched.
“Touché,” she said a little too loudly, furious with him as he rose and met her gaze with a hard one of his own. “You truly are a dickhead. Honest to God, aren’t ya?” She crossed her arms, ignoring the bleating of the goats behind her.
“Yeah, well. Sorry. I didn’t mean….”
“To what? Remind me of the third time I let you back in my house, my body, my heart? Goddamn, but you are incredible, considering how all that ended up. I hate you,” she heard herself yelling, even as she swallowed the inevitable, dreaded, Dominic-induced tears, yanking thoughts of Lee into the forefront of her brain to shield her.
“As you should.” He tipped the brim of his ratty UK ballcap with a sad smile. “I’ll go, leave you to your menagerie.”
When he walked away, words on the tip of her tongue forced themselves out. “I love you. Don’t leave me,” she whispered. But her eyes stayed dry as she headed into the barn. “I’m coming, I’m coming, sheesh, bossy animals.” She grabbed the feed bucket and headed inside to her flock.
Dom sat chatting with his younger sister while Diana put the plate of country-fried pork chops in the center of the dining room table. He had spent the rest of the evening ignoring her—easy since Angelique filled all the conversational holes with news from home.
“So, Kieran and Cara.” She named their older brother and his high school girlfriend who’d reappeared in a surprise twist for everyone concerned. “They’re together, but she won’t marry him yet. It’s making him nuts, but he’s busy with the basketball team and loving it. He’s taking classes in the mornings, working on his master’s degree so he can teach.”
“Nice.” Dom sipped the beer she’d put in front of him—a Love Brothers cream stout. “I mean, about Francis and his girl. Not this.” He set the bottle down on the table and pushed it away.
“Antony and Margot are convincing AliceLynn to apply to some fancy schmancy Ivy League schools. Who’da figured she’s a brainiac under all that slutty goth?” Angelique got up to help Diana bring in the bowls of cut corn and greens from last year’s garden.
Dom grunted and put his elbows on the table. “Don’t call her a slut.”
“Oh, you know I didn’t mean it. Besides I call her that to her face. She’s calmed down real nice. Margot playing good cop to Antony’s asshole cop is working.”
“From what I remember of Antony, Margot must be pretty special to have settled all that down.” Diana smiled when Angelique gave her a quick squeeze. “Good to see you again, hon. Grab the biscuits, willya?”
Diana sat, suddenly bone tired. Dom passed her a beer. She took it and frowned at him. “This is really good. What’s your problem?”
“I didn’t make it.”
She reached over to touch his lips for reasons that escaped her.
“Hey, guys.” Lee burst through the side door. Startled, she dropped her arm, guilt coursing through her at the sight of the tall, handsome, loving, and fabulous man standing in her kitchen, seemingly thrilled to see her—and what she’d put on the table. “I’m starved, but I gotta jump a quick shower first. Don’t wanna subject anyone to cow afterbirth.” He kissed the top of Diana’s head, nodded to Dom, and bounded up the steps.
“Gross,” Dom said mildly, toying with his barely touched glass of dark brown beer.
Diana realized she had her napkin clutched so hard her fingers hurt.
“Now that is the kind of vet that makes me wanna get a dog.” Angelique grinned from ear to ear as she plunked the basket of steaming hot biscuits in the center of the food. She gave Diana a fake punch to the shoulder. “Nice work.”
“Yeah, thanks.” Diana sipped her beer and avoided Dom’s gaze.
“Y’all playing ball tomorrow?” Angelique asked, taking her seat next to her brother and draping an arm over his hunched shoulders. “Huh, Sean?” She kissed his cheek, using the Love family habit of calling the boys by their middle names.
“I dunno, maybe. It’s gonna snow. You’re headed back to school soon, right?” He disentangled and gave her his best pissed-off glare.
“I dunno, maybe.” She parroted, pouting like a pro, Diana noted, glancing up when Lee reappeared, dressed in jeans and a soft gray T-shirt.
“What’s wrong, sweet cheeks?” He took a seat between her and Angelique. “Long day slaughtering nature’s gentle creatures?”
She started to pick up the plate of chops. Angelique cleared her throat and held out her hands on the table. “I’ll say grace.”
Lee blinked then looked to Diana. She smiled and nodded at him. He smiled back, nearly melting her heart, and took hers and Angelique’s outstretched palms.
“Dear Lord,” Angelique began. “Bless this food for the nourishment of our bodies. Thank you for your bounty and for the folks that prepared it. Be with us in the coming week, help us to be the best we can be. Amen.”
Diana picked up her napkin and put it in her lap. “Thanks, Angel. I forget sometimes.”
“Oh, you know our Angel.” Dominic scooped greens onto his plate and reached across the table for a biscuit. “ She’s a regular Sunday School teacher.”
His sister smacked his shoulder. “Shut up, you jerk.”
“I’m getting that a lot lately.” He frowned at Diana. She smiled sweetly at him.
“Damn, these are the most amazing pork chops I’ve ever eaten in my life.” Lee cut his second bite and grinned at her.
“You do know they come from nature’s gentle pig creatures, right?” Dom stated without a trace of irony.
“Yeah, I do know. I think it’s great that Diana can dress a deer in an afternoon. I used to hunt. Then I started taking care of animals that took bullets accidently by clumsy hunters. Animals like dogs.” Lee kept eating. He wasn’t giving off a confrontational vibe at all, merely being matter-of-fact.
“Oh, no,” Angelique declared, a little too dramatically. But who could blame her? Lee was all that and a bag of chips—the phrase wafted through her memory like a ghost.
Diana smiled and grabbed his thigh under the table. He put his over it and smiled at her, making her feel like the only woman in the universe. Dom cleared his throat. Lee raised an eyebrow at her. She shook her head.
“It’s honey,” she said.
“Um, what?”
“Honey. I drizzle it on the chops while they’re hot.”
“Wow.” Lee put another bite in his mouth, chewing and swallowing with gusto. “Perfect.”
Diana wondered if that word would ever apply to her again.
Chapter Eleven
Dom woke to pounding on his door. He sat up, picking up the anger burden and shouldering it. He’d resumed taking his meds right after the reunion in the barn followed by the shocking revelation of Lee Tolliver’s existence. Somehow it seemed less problematic that they would razor off his edge—take away the highs with the lows. That was one of the reasons he’d quit taking them once he’d connected with Kent. He didn’t want to be blunted by chemistry—wanted to experience everything, physical and emotional. Of course, once he’d admitted it, Kent had been furious, insisting that he get to
the doctor and figure out the best way to get chemically sorted out again.
But to Dom’s mind, all the time he’d spent in the presence of doctors and therapists seeking to make him less volatile at his parents’ request had made him a real para-professional when it came to antianxiety and antidepressant drugs. Even now he had that familiar sensation of watching events unfolding from a distance while encased in a warm fluffy, impenetrable cloud—all indicative symptoms of the early phase of his chemical readjustment.
The past months had been a blur of readjustment on a lot of levels. Accepting that Diana had actually meant it when she’d floored him with her that’s my boyfriend reveal up in the haymow after their night together had been tougher than he’d expected. Combined with his re-medication regimen, it had proven challenging. But it had also provided the distraction he required to force all thoughts of Kent Lowery completely out of his mind.
“Get up, ya lazy ass,” a male voice intoned from the doorway. “I’m driving us in for the ball game.”
Dom groaned and stretched out his already sore arms and legs. Stomping out into the snow and facing the weekly basketball game had not been terribly high on his agenda for the day. He loved the first snowfall, but usually from inside a warm house, holding a hot beverage, preferably doctored up with bourbon. But he got up and into a pair of shorts. Ignoring Kieran’s idiotic grin, he stumbled into the bathroom, then remerged with an empty bladder and clean teeth.
“Jesus, Francis, do we hafta?”
“You know we all need it. Antony’s on some kind of tear over AliceLynn and it would appear that Margot is taking the girl’s side. So now he’s this growling, grumpy, man-shaped bear. I’m sick of studying for finals. You…you’re….”
“I’m stuck in my old girlfriend’s house listening to her get fucked by Doctor Horse Whisperer, getting paid to hang and mud drywall, and trying to concoct better beer out of a damn mushroom.” He leaned in the doorway, arms crossed. “That about sum it up? Oh, wait.” He held up a finger as if remembering something. “And I’ve been declared officially dead by the Love family pater familias, so I can never go home again. There, that about does it.”