Next she grabs the Jim Beam bourbon and pours another half an ounce in each glass. “Don’t forget about my boyfriend, Johnnie Walker.” She serves up the scotch whiskey with a same-size pour. “And finally, my amigo, Jose Cuervo.” She sets the last bottle back on the shelf and with a big smile picks up one of the shots. Raising it in the air she says, “To a winning season, coach!”
The guys all grab a shot and salutes of “To Brogan” and “To the next chapter” ring around me as we all knock back the shots.
It’s probably at least an hour later when I find myself stumbling down the street on my way back to Cate’s place. My boys are still at the bar, elbow deep in tits and ass. I need to pass out on Cate’s couch at this point and hope my hangover in the morning won’t require me to pray to the porcelain God.
It’s dark in the apartment when I come in. I’m trying so hard to be quiet, but I’m a little too aggressive with the door. Not to mention the damn chair that trips me up. Seriously, where the fuck did this chair come from?
I freeze when a light comes on in Cate’s bedroom. A minute later she walks out wearing her pajamas; a matching black cami-and-short set. I must have startled her because she didn’t even bother to put on a robe. Her hair is messy and sexy as fuck.
I’m about to tell her how sorry I am for waking her but my inhibitions are gone. Thank you, alcohol. Instead I say, “I could eat you, you look so good right now.”
She bursts out laughing.
“Wait, what? What did I say?” I’ve already forgotten. I think I should be mortified right now, but instead I start laughing because she’s laughing.
When her laughter dies down she says, “If you’re so hungry, champ, why don’t you eat some of the tacos in your hand?”
I look down and, sure enough. I did stop and grab some tacos on the way home. I guess that explains why I was having such a hell of a time with the door.
“Or better yet, maybe you should go to sleep.” She giggles again and decides she’s okay to go back to bed now that she knows what the commotion was all about. She stops in the doorway and says, “Glad you made it back in one piece.” Her eyes are sparkling and she gives me the sweetest smile. A minute later the light goes out again and I’m left standing in the darkness.
With all of the alcohol in my body right now, trying to process anything is like walking through tar. I feel like there is something significant that I should notice about our interaction but my mind can’t get there. I let myself collapse on the couch without bothering to eat my tacos. I’m completely relaxed and so close to sleep when I realize what it is.
Unlike every other night that I’ve slept over, tonight, she didn’t close her door.
Chapter Ten
Cate
I’ve only been lying here for a little while when I hear the floorboards creak at the entrance to my room. I know I’m playing with fire tonight, but I’m tired of waiting around to see what might happen between us. Let’s face it, I’ve been waiting long enough.
I’m facing away from the door, pretending to be asleep when I feel the bed dip behind me. My entire body is instantly awake, but I’m frozen in place, not even breathing. The anticipation of what’s coming next is better than Christmas. I’ve imagined what being with Brogan would be like at least a million times over the years.
The first thing I feel is his fingers gently brushing across the satin fabric of my shorts. He’s timid as if his fingers might burn when they make contact with my skin. He’s only touching my hip, but it feels incredibly intimate.
The breath I’ve been holding escapes as well as a soft moan. His fingers still for only a moment and then I can feel his body press into my back. His arousal is evident in the way his cock presses against my ass. I push back into him and his fingers tighten around my hip.
The next thing I know he has wrapped his large, muscular body around me and I feel his lips on my neck after he brushes my hair out of the way. I want him to touch every inch of my body. I feel the need that I’ve been holding inside of me all of these years start to consume me.
Without thinking it through, I roll over so we’re facing each other. I let my leg trail up and over his until it wraps around his thigh and I can feel him between my legs. Our lips finally connect while I let my hands explore every crevice of his body.
His lips are soft against mine, but I can feel the urgency in his kiss. Another moan escapes my mouth when his hands find my breasts and rub against my sensitive nipples, touching me with the right combination of sweet and savage.
I’m completely lost in him; entranced with the way he’s moving his tongue against mine and grinding his hips against me. I’ve never needed someone to be inside of me so badly. At this moment I’d give anything to feel him filling me in the most intimate of ways.
He rolls so that his body is on top of mine and a ding sounds from his phone in his pocket. His passion doesn’t slow so I ignore it as well until a moment later when another ding sounds, followed by multiple dings, one right after the other.
“Shit,” he says. He pulls up onto his knees above me and pulls his phone out of his pocket. I try to calm the beating of my heart as he reads through the text messages he’s received. “I’m sorry, it’s my buddies that I was out with tonight. They’re all drunk texting back and forth.” He presses a button on his phone, either powering it down or turning off the volume, and sets it on the nightstand.
“How drunk are you tonight?” I ask, “I mean, will you remember this in the morning?” For the first time tonight a seed of doubt has planted itself in my mind. I don’t want this to be a drunk make-out session that won’t mean anything tomorrow morning.
“I’ve had a lot to drink but there’s no way I’m not going to remember this in the morning.” He stretches back over me, laying half on me and half on the bed. His fingers brush the hair off of my forehead as his eyes gaze into mine. “We don’t have to rush anything, though.”
Suddenly I feel like he has the right idea. As good as it feels to have him here in my bed, I want it to mean something to him. I don’t want to be the warm body that was available after a night of drinking. “Okay, how about a raincheck for when you’re sober,” I say.
He chuckles and kisses me one more time. “You want me back on the couch?”
“No, stay.”
I move to my side and Brogan snuggles in behind me while reaching down and pulling the blanket over us. I can’t say that I’m tired, however. There’s something about being wrapped in Brogan’s arms that makes me buzz with excitement. Sleep might be impossible tonight.
I feel Brogan take a deep breath and relax even more into the bed. I want to talk to him. I want to ask him questions about the last few years of his life and what he’s been up to. Mostly, I don’t want to fall asleep because I don’t know where we’ll stand when I wake up in the morning. I quickly realize that the conflict I’m experiencing in my mind is pointless because I can tell from his breathing that he’s fallen asleep.
I can tell it’s early the next morning when I first begin to wake. It’s dark in the bedroom, but morning must be close with how rested I feel. The first thought that storms back into my mind is that Brogan is sleeping in the bed with me. His arm is still wrapped around me, in fact, as if he passed out last night and never moved.
I close my eyes and enjoy the feeling of being held in Brogan’s arms. Normally I’m not the type of girl who likes to share her bed. I like my space. And if it’s the morning after with some guy I happened to stay with, I don’t want the awkward conversation in the light of the day.
While I’m lying here without moving, trying to make this moment last as long as possible, the revelation of how much Brogan feels like home to me starts to sink in. Honestly, it scares me. I worry that I’ll never be able to feel this way for anyone else. And if things don’t work out the way I’ve always hoped they would, I might find myself living a lonely life.
I haven’t lived like a nun, that’s for sure. But I think in the back o
f my mind I knew that whomever I chose to spend time with was temporary. I always figured one day the timing would work out and I’d finally be where I belong, with my soul mate.
When I finally open my eyes there’s a glow of soft light around the windows. I find that I naturally wake up early now that I own a coffee shop. Our best business happens during the morning rush when everyone is scrambling to get to work on time. The weekends are busy, too, but the crowds come throughout the day instead of all at once. There’s more of a relaxed feel to our Saturday and Sunday folks. Life slows down on the weekends.
I feel Brogan stir for the first time. He rolls on his back and a pained moan escapes his lips. He’s massaging his temples when I roll over to face him.
“Do you have any Tylenol?” He asks.
“Of course.” I roll out of bed and walk into the kitchen. Unlike most people, I don’t have a medicine cabinet in the bathroom mirror. Just a plain, rectangular mirror. I keep all of my meds in the cabinet above the stove. Reaching on my tiptoes, I grab the economy-sized bottle of generic acetaminophen. The glasses are kept in the next cabinet over; I grab one and fill it with cold, filtered water from the fridge.
When I walk back into the bedroom I happen to notice the unopened bag of tacos sitting on the coffee table in the living room. I can’t help but smile.
“Here you go,” I say quietly as I sit on the edge of the bed. He props himself up on his elbow and tosses both pills in his mouth at the same time and washes them down with an entire glass of water. “Do you want anything to eat or will that make you throw up?”
“Throw up,” he says. He lies back down and covers his eyes with his arm. It’s stupid, but I let myself sit and enjoy this moment. Whatever else I thought, or hoped, would happen this morning, obviously won’t. So after I have my fill of admiring Brogan’s sexy body lying in my bed, I walk into the bathroom, strip out of my pajamas, and step into the shower turning the faucet to cold.
Chapter Eleven
Cate
The movie theater is packed by the time we get to our seats, but luckily we had the sense to order our tickets ahead of time. Aaron is carrying our drinks and I have the large tub of delicious, buttery popcorn. It has been so long since I have made it to the movies that we decided to splurge.
When I stopped into the coffee shop this morning, there was a slow trickle of people throughout the day but never an overwhelming rush. Aaron, Bree and I got to talking about the summer movie scene and whether or not there was anything still worth seeing now that summer was officially coming to an end.
Aaron has always been a big movie buff and I used to be, before I opened my own business and the concept of free time became nonexistent. So when he asked Bree and I if we felt like catching a movie, I threw caution to the wind and accepted the invitation.
As for Bree, she’s exhausted and really pregnant, so hopefully she’s at home with her feet up right now. I think tonight will be good for me for two reasons. One, I miss Bree. We haven’t been able to hang out as much as we used to before she got married and started popping out kids. I’m over-the-moon happy for her, but it doesn’t mean that I don’t miss her. It feels nice to be out with a friend tonight.
Two, I figured it would do me good to have a little space from Brogan to sort out what my next move should be. After our deliciously yummy make-out session last night I have no idea what to expect from him when we see each other again. I already know that I have my hopes up that things have finally turned a corner for us. It’s hard to know whether he feels the same way when he had definitely been drinking. I’m not used to feeling needy when it comes to a man and I don’t want to come off as desperate for him.
Aaron hits the button on the side of his chair and the leg rest extends from the bottom. He hands me my slush while grabbing a scoop of popcorn and eating it directly out of his hand. I use the straw to mix the slush around so I get the perfect combination of ice and juice before I take a sip.
“Hey man, you must have my cherry slush, this is grape,” I say.
“Whoa, close call.” He immediately grabs his cup and we trade. “Better?” He asks.
“Yes,” I say. I smile and take a sip, relaxing back into my chair.
“Enjoy what you’re feeling now,” he says, “because I read that this movie is an edge-of-your-seat terror-ride from the first scene to the final credits.”
“Seriously?”
“Yes, seriously.” He laughs as he sees the transformation of one emotion to the next cross my face. I love horror movies, but I hate them at the same time. I’m already starting to regret agreeing to this when the lights go down and the previews start.
Within the first fifteen minutes my legs are pulled up to my chest and I’m watching the movie through the small openings between my fingers. My heart has almost jumped out of my chest at least ten times already.
I audibly sigh with relief when I check my watch and realize the movie will end soon. As soon as the credits start to roll I glare at Aaron and say, “What the hell!”
He tips his head back and laughs.
“I’m going to need a minute to recover before we leave.”
“It wasn’t that bad, was it?” he asks.
“Yes! Yes, it was that bad. I don’t think I’m going to be able to sleep tonight.”
He takes my hand and squeezes it. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think it was going to be so scary. Usually there are a few good jumps but not consistently through the whole movie.”
“That was terrifying! Not to mention I don’t think I’ll ever be able to park my car in a parking garage again.”
“Well let’s talk about something else to get your mind off of it. Why don’t you tell me how things are going with you and the football player.”
Ironically, the reason I came to the movie in the first place was to get my mind off of Brogan. Now after successfully not thinking about him for ninety minutes Aaron has managed to direct my thoughts right back to him.
“Just tell me you haven’t slept with him,” he says.
I can feel my cheeks flush. I immediately think about the hot, passionate kisses we shared last night. Not to mention how amazing it felt to have his hands explore my body.
Aaron lets out a frustrated groan and pulls out his phone.
“I didn’t sleep with him!” I say.
“Look,” he says as he flips his phone around for me to look at. “This is one of the gossip sites I follow. Here he is with a bunch of bimbos at Jack’s bar the other night.”
My stomach drops when I realize he’s talking about last night. I flip through the pictures on his phone and I hate the flare of jealousy that I feel coarse through my body. There are multiple pictures of Brogan with an unidentified blonde and girls I can only assume are her friends. They’re all laughing and flirting in the pictures. They look like they’re talking intimately, but it gives me a little comfort that there aren’t any pictures of them kissing or making out.
“Okay, so he’s with a bunch of women. That doesn’t mean anything. What guys don’t flirt with beautiful women when they’re out with their friends at a bar?”
“Yes, that’s true. But I want you to be careful. Those guys live a very different life from you and me. And I know you grew up together, but people change and I want to make sure you consider the fact that Brogan might not be the man you used to know. That’s all I want to say.”
“I know you mean well, Aaron, but you don’t have to worry about me. Brogan and I are friends and nothing has happened between us.” Technically that isn’t one-hundred percent true, but he doesn’t need to know about our little make-out session last night.
“A friend that you’ve been in love with since you were little.”
“There’s no way you could know that.”
“Bree told me. She knows it.”
“Well I’m a big girl and I know how things work. I’ll be okay, whatever happens.”
***
It’s well after ten when we finally get back to m
y place. Aaron insists on walking me up to my door. We’re standing there saying our goodbyes when the door suddenly opens. We had been mid-hug, but we pull apart quickly after being startled by the door.
“Oh, Brogan. You scared me, I thought you might be asleep,” I say.
“Nope, not asleep,” He says. I can tell immediately that he’s upset. He won’t look at me, but he’s sending daggers Aaron’s way.
“Ah, Aaron, this is Brogan. Brogan, this is my friend, Aaron. He works at the coffee shop with me.”
They exchange an awkward handshake and then Aaron quickly says his goodbyes.
Once Aaron is gone Brogan stands away from the door so I can walk through. I have no idea what to say. There’s an uncomfortable silence that falls over us once he locks the door. I’m about to ask him what’s wrong when he says, “Now that I know you’re not dead in a ditch somewhere, I’m going to sleep.”
He walks away into the living room before I have a chance to say anything. I manage to say his name to try to get him to stay and talk to me, but he’s not interested. He flips off the one lamp in the living room and I’m standing in the dark.
“Are you serious right now? What the hell is your problem?”
“What’s my problem?” He sits up on the couch and flips the lamp back on. “I thought last night meant something, but I guess I was wrong.”
“I don’t know what last night meant. But you were drunk, so I wasn’t even sure you’d remember anything today anyway.”
“So you thought you’d go out with another guy?”
“Aaron is a friend! We went to catch a movie together.” I know my voice is rising and I’m acting irrationally, but I feel like I’m being scolded and it rubs me the wrong way. Not to mention I don’t feel like I did anything wrong. And on top of that, Brogan hasn’t made any claim to me.
He’s quiet for a minute, his head down. There must be something really interesting on the carpet. “This is stupid,” he says quietly.
A Devoted Heart (The Heart's Temptation Series Book 2) Page 5