“Hey mom, do you mind if I step outside for a minute? Catey’s out there and I need to talk to her.”
“Catey’s here?” My mom walks over and leans over the sink, searching the backyard for her. “What’s she doing back there?”
“Long story short, we’re dating and I messed things up…again. I had a feeling she might have come back here to get away for awhile.”
“Okay, well, go, go,” she says and ushers me with her hands towards the back door. “I’ll figure out what to do for dinner while you two figure things out out there.”
All of the urgency I felt to find her has dissipated with the long car drive and now I’m left with butterflies in my stomach as I walk out the back door, toward our old tree house.
Most of the day is done, the sky starting to turn a light orange color. The temperature has already dropped and soon we’ll be able to see our breath in the air. I think about going back into the house and grabbing a blanket for Cate, but that’ll be a motivator to get her to come inside with me.
Just as I reach the lot line, I step on a stick and the loud crack echoes out into the quiet evening. Cate’s body tenses, but she doesn’t turn around.
“This isn’t the furthest you’ve gone to get away from me, but it’s pretty close,” I say as I step around the tree and sit down on a rock across from her. I slump when I see her face and feel a tightness in my chest. I can tell she has been crying and I hate that I’m the cause of it.
“You running away?” I ask.
She doesn’t answer and she still hasn’t looked at me. I guess I should be glad that she isn’t screaming or cursing me out.
“Catey,” I say. I slide a little closer so our knees are touching. “Nothing happened, I swear to you, nothing happened. I met her for a drink, that’s all. She’s an old friend from college.”
My words all tumble out. I’m desperate for her to acknowledge me, forgive me.
She still doesn’t say anything, but she closes her eyes and tilts her head down.
“I needed to try to figure out what to do next. And all I can think about is that I don’t know why my heart can’t give up on you. All you do is hurt me,” she says. “You never think about how your actions are going to affect other people.”
Her words make my heart ache, because she’s right; I’ve never been good about thinking things through.
“I know, you’re right,” I say. “I’ve been so selfish when it comes to you because I’ve never needed anyone in my life the way I’ve needed you.” I reach out and put my hands on her legs. It feels good to touch her and have her close after my frantic searching for her today.
She finally looks up and meets my eyes. I want to lean in and kiss her until she agrees to forgive me and come home.
“You needed me when it was convenient for you,” she says.
She challenges me with her stare and I have to look down. I know I screwed things up between us, but I was young and stupid. I’m not that man anymore and I need to make her see that.
“You’re right, I’ve been selfish. And I’m going to continue to be selfish because I’m not going to let you go.” The fire inside of me has been refueled and there’s no way I’m going home without her tonight.
“I know I messed up in the past but I’m one-hundred-and-fifty percent committed to you. I took the coaching job so I could be close to you. You are the one and only reason that I am in Winterhaven.”
“I shouldn’t have gone to Ava’s hotel for a drink but that’s all it was…a drink. It’s you and me, Catey. It has always been you and me.” The pleading look in my eyes is hopefully driving straight through to her heart. “Do you believe me?” I ask.
She looks at me for a while and I have a shimmer of hope that her resolve is cracking. Finally she gives a slight nod of her head. I release a long drawn out breath and reach for her hand.
“Thank God. This has been a long, awful day,” I say.
“Tell me about it,” she says.
I finally have the courage to reach in and pull her close to me. I bury my face in her hair and let myself breathe in the scent of her. It smells crisp and clean, the scent of fall. She hugs me back tightly. I’ve been chasing this feeling all day, the feeling of contentment. Serenity.
Nuzzling her neck, I let my lips rest on her skin as the last moments of the day slip beneath the horizon and leave us in privacy beneath our tree.
With the sun gone, the temperature is dropping fast. I pull back, looking into her face and smoothing my hand in her hair. I’m relieved when she presses her lips to mine, slowly at first, tentative. After a moment I can feel the heat of her passion, letting me know that I haven’t lost her after all.
“My mom would love for us to join her for dinner tonight,” I say when we break the kiss.
“That would be nice. I haven’t seen your mom in a long time.”
“We can stay here tonight and drive back in the morning. After all of the years that I spent sleeping on the floor in your room, you can finally sleep over in mine.”
“You’re going to let me sleep in your room? Scandalous,” she says. “What is your mom going to think about that?”
“I think she’ll be okay with it,” I say as I stand up, grabbing both of her hands in mine while pulling her to her feet.
Walking across the yard hand in hand, I point toward her childhood home and ask, “Do you ever miss it?”
“Yes, absolutely,” she answers without hesitation. “I have a lot of good memories there. Most of them involve you, ya know.”
“Oh yeah? I’m glad some of the good memories involve me. I know I gave you a lot of trouble growing up, too.”
“You did, but let’s hope it all works out in our favor.”
“It will. I know it.”
Chapter Thirty-Two
Cate
After a cozy, quiet dinner, Brogan and I are lounging in his room looking through a box from his closet full of his yearbooks and odds and ends from high school. Of course he has an entire box of his football stuff, including his jerseys and trophies.
“This feels so strange, I feel like I should go home before I get in trouble for being in your room with the door closed.” I say. I pull out one of the yearbooks from the box and settle in on the bed with it.
Opening the book I immediately start seeing the faces of people that I knew well in school but haven’t seen or spoken to in over ten years.
“Oh look!” I say to Brogan as I point to one of our old classmates. “Do you remember Glenn Harper?”
“Glenn Harper?” Brogan says as he walks over and sits on the bed next to me. He looks where my finger is pointing and studies the picture for a minute. “Yes, I definitely had a class with him. Which one, I don’t remember. But I know him.”
“You might remember seeing him in the news a few years back. He owns a super successful company now. Gives a lot to charity and does a lot of humanitarian work. He’s doing some amazing things.”
“Yeah, I remember him being a really nice guy. Good for him,” he says.
I continue to page through the book. Brogan lies down next to me and stretches out on the bed.
“Tired?” I ask.
“Yes,” he says, his arm stretching over his forehead, his eyes closing.
“Me, too.” My hand starts to slowly rub across his chest, soothing his worries away.
“Hey, no funny business, Mercer. My mom’s in the next room.”
I quickly pull my hand away and smile. “Okay, no funny business.”
I go back to looking through the yearbook, eventually feeling his hand softly slip under my shirt and start rubbing my back.
“But now that I think about it, we’ve never messed around in my room before.”
I don’t know why but my mind instantly jumps to which women he might have messed around with in here over the years. He senses the change in my body language. Not to mention my face is an open book.
“Hey, you okay?” he asks.
“Yes.�
� I give him a quick smile, but he knows me too well. He sits back up, pulling me close, making me look at him.
“Stop thinking whatever it is you’re thinking about.”
“I know,” I say, shaking my head, trying to rid it of any negative thoughts.
“There’s no going backward, we can’t change anything that has happened. And there’s always going to be a lack of privacy being with me. Hopefully not as much now that I’m not playing football myself, but it goes along with it.”
“I know. Doesn’t it bother you, though?”
“Of course. Especially when I see shit like yesterday. But it goes with the territory and for the most part I don’t even pay attention anymore. The media hasn’t been kind. Especially this creep Jonathan Norton. He writes straight-up lies about me. I don’t know what it is, it’s like he’s out to get me or something.”
“Do you know him?”
“No, I have no idea who he is. But you have to know that not everything you read about me is true.”
“I know. It looked really bad yesterday.”
“Yeah, it did.” He runs his hands through his hair, shaking his head. “Ava and I were friends in college. We never dated or anything like that. I didn’t even think twice about grabbing a drink and catching up.”
“I get it. You don’t realize how appealing you are to the opposite sex. You were getting a drink with an old friend and she was hoping to get in your pants.”
He laughs. “I didn’t even notice.” His fingers caress my cheek, his thumb smoothing over my lips. He leans in and presses his lips to mine. Our foreheads press together when our lips pull apart. With our eyes closed we savor the pleasure of this intimacy.
He lies back down on the bed, pulling me down with him and tucking me in his embrace. The only light in the room is coming from the small lamp on the nightstand next to the bed. Instead of closing my eyes I look around at the posters on his wall.
He has a bulletin board hanging on one wall where he has tacked newspaper articles from his high school football years. There’s a picture of him in the lower corner mostly covered by other papers. I can’t tell who he’s with in the picture but it must be important because it’s the only picture I see in the whole room.
There are a few posters of some of his sports idols as well as a few from music groups that he was into when he was younger. There’s a football jersey hanging on his wall. I don’t recognize the name of the player but that’s no surprise. I’m sure it’s someone significant.
His breathing is relaxed, but I know he isn’t sleeping yet.
“Tell me, what happened with your dad?”
He’s quiet for a while and I start to think that maybe I was wrong, maybe he is asleep already. When he finally speaks, his voice is quiet, gruff. I could listen to him talk all day long. Just the kind of lullaby I need.
“You read the article in the paper?”
“Yes.”
“And what did you think?”
“I knew it wasn’t true. I mean, at least not how it was written.”
“You already know what kind of man my dad was. When he finally walked out on us, it was almost a relief. I figured I could stop hoping he’d grow up and take an interest in my life.” He exhales and I realize that he has probably never talked to anyone about his dad. It has always been something he has kept inside, bottled up.
“Or I could stop hoping my mom would grow a backbone and kick his ass to the curb for always stepping out on her like he did. It didn’t feel good at the time, but after a while I realized that we were going to be much better off without him.”
He sighs and continues. “I hadn’t heard from him in years, but then I was drafted, signed a big contract, and low and behold, who shows up again? I was visiting my mom, we were hanging out watching a movie. He showed up. At least he had the decency to ring the doorbell instead of letting himself in.
“Anyway, he had been drinking and when I told him to get lost he became belligerent. My mom ended up calling the police when he started trashing the house, I grabbed onto him to try to get him to calm down.
“He told the police that I assaulted him. The newspapers blew it completely out of proportion. Somehow it turned into steroid aggression in the papers. The NFL launched an investigation because of the claims of steroid use, even though there was nothing to substantiate the claims.
“I guess the bottom line, not only was he a shitty dad to me growing up, he almost cost me my football career, too.”
“God, Brogan, that really sucks. I’m so sorry.”
“Thankfully it’s over. I was eventually cleared of all charges, the assault charge and the claim of steroid use, but I feel like some of the damage that was done couldn’t be undone at that point. People are going to think what they want and for some people, I was a creep.”
“You are not a creep, don’t say that.” I give him a tight squeeze around the waist and kiss his shoulder. “So what’s the deal with this journalist who has it out for you? You don’t know him personally, but what’s his deal? Were you on the rival team or something?”
“I honestly don’t know.”
“Maybe I’ll have to do a little digging and find out who this guy is and why he’s trying to destroy you in the media.”
“No, you don’t need to worry about it. As long as you know who I am and the kind of person I am, I’m happy.”
“I’m happy, too,” I say as I climb under the covers, pulling them over us and snuggling in. Brogan leans over and switches off the lamp, leaving us in a comfortable darkness. The steady rise and fall of Brogan’s chest is enough to lull me into a peaceful sleep.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Cate
I get up early in order to drive back to Winterhaven. The drive takes most of the day and I have to get back to work. Brogan’s staying with his mom for a while this morning and then he’ll be back home by tonight. Brogan’s mom gives me a big hug and sends me off with a loaf of homemade bread.
At the car, Brogan scoops me up into his arms. I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him hard on the lips.
“Drive safely,” he says when our lips part.
“I will. You, too.”
“I will. I can’t wait to see you tonight. I’ll try not to be too late.”
“Okay. I’ll be waiting.” I wink my eyebrows and smile, confident he gets the insinuation.
He sets me back down and I get in the car. It’s early and yesterday was a long day. I’m going to need to stop for coffee at some point. He stands in the driveway while I back up, his hands in his pockets. The sight warms my heart and makes me think of when we were younger, growing up together in this neighborhood.
He pulls one hand out and holds it up. I wave back then drive slowly past my childhood house. I take a moment to look at some of the changes the new owners have made. There’s a different mailbox and they’ve added a wooden fence in the backyard.
They’ve replaced the shutter on the front window that had a chip in the wood. I still remember when Brogan and I were playing baseball in the front yard and I hit the ball into the shutter, breaking off a piece. My mom wasn’t nearly as upset as I thought she’d be.
I’ve been in the car for an hour when I open the bag and tear right into that bread. I stopped about fifteen minutes after getting in the car for a coffee. Thankfully the caffeine buzz is enough to keep me awake and on track.
Now that things have been resolved with Brogan, I can actually relax and enjoy the drive. There is still a lot of color on the trees though a lot of the leaves have already started to fall. Traffic is light and I’m making good time. It feels like things are on the upswing today.
I drive right to the coffee shop when I get back to Winterhaven. Aaron covered for me while I was gone, but it feels strange to have been away for almost two days. Normally I’m there every day, at least for a few hours if not the entire day.
It’s quiet when I walk in, one person in the front of the store by the windows on his laptop. Aaro
n is behind the counter and things look fine. The place didn’t burn down or anything while I was gone.
“Look who’s back!” Aaron says when I walk behind the counter. “You are one popular lady.”
“What do you mean?” I say as I give him a quick squeeze.
“You had a few male suitors looking for you while you were gone.”
I’m looking at him like he has grown two heads. He continues when he notices my confused look.
“Brogan came in looking for you and then another guy came in looking for you later that day.”
“Oh. Do you know who the second guy was?”
“No and he didn’t leave his name. I told him you’d be back by tomorrow so maybe he’ll stop back in.”
“Well thanks. I appreciate you covering while I was out of town.”
“No problem. Everything okay?”
“Yes. Things are good.” I start fixing myself another coffee. I wasn’t going to have two but I want to be able to wait up for Brogan tonight. Sleeping with him last night but not being able to do anything has my body on high alert. “Things went okay here?”
“Yep. Smooth sailing.”
“Awesome. Well now that I know that you can handle things so well here, I’ll have to take some more time off.”
“Fine by me. The hours are good for my checking account.”
“Well I can take over now if you’re ready for a break.”
“That sounds good. We’ve been pretty slow, but I’m planning on being back in the morning to help again, so a break would be good.”
“Thanks, Aaron. I really appreciate your help.”
“No problem.”
Aaron is right, it is a slow day. The rest of the evening moves by at a snail’s pace because there aren’t a lot of customers to help. I make myself busy anyway, going through our inventory, making notes on what will need to be ordered.
A Devoted Heart (The Heart's Temptation Series Book 2) Page 16