by Rebecca Sky
‘Tell Ben I’m finished,’ Kyle says, glaring at me. ‘She’s annoying. I can’t stand her.’
All I can do is stare, mouth half open.
‘Kyle?’ Marissa says, her voice low, a warning.
There’s a shuffling on the other end of the line.
‘Hey,’ says Marissa, ‘I was using that.’ She isn’t talking to Kyle.
‘What the hell?’ It’s Ben, and just hearing his voice makes me feel safe. ‘Wait there. We’ll turn around.’
‘We shouldn’t waste valuable escape time,’ Marissa says on the other side. ‘The police are probably following us.’
‘We’re coming to you, meet half way,’ Kyle says, cutting off Marissa. He tosses me back the phone, not bothering to hang up.
A large part of me wants to slip off my glove and reach across and touch his bare arm. It would be easy to turn him again, to make him care. Instead I grip my phone like a lifeline. ‘This isn’t you.’
He grabs my cardigan off the seat and throws it on my lap.
I sit there, blinking at him. This can’t actually be happening. Something flares up inside me. ‘No matter how you feel for me, I don’t deserve to be treated like this,’ I say, grabbing my things and, even though I know I should go with him to meet Ben, I get out of the SUV. ‘Tell Ben I’ll wait for him here.’
I don’t know what I was expecting, but Kyle doesn’t hesitate. He pulls the truck into a U-turn and leaves me, all alone, on the side of the unfamiliar road.
I kick rocks off the shoulder, replaying the fight with Kyle. I don’t know what I could’ve done differently. One thing’s for sure, not listening to Marissa would’ve been a good start. I shake my head and kick another rock, missing it and stubbing my toe.
‘Seriously?’ I pick it up and throw it at a tree.
Time passes painfully slow as I pace on the gravel shoulder. Other than the rustle of tree branches and the odd bird chirp, it’s silent and empty. I plop on to a small boulder and dig through my pocket for the phone, pulling it out to reveal my battery’s too low for a call. It’s been nearly an hour since Kyle ditched me.
Ben should’ve been here by now.
The sun will set soon, and I can’t help thinking he’s not coming. If he isn’t, I can’t very well sleep here, on the side of the road, next to the woods. I stand up, slip my cardigan on and start walking, hoping that it won’t be far to somewhere with a phone or a way to New York.
The walk is hard. My legs ache, my stomach rumbles. The evening breeze chills me. I hug my arms, but my knees are like icicles. I’m regretting wearing shorts. I’m not warm enough to last a night like this. And worse than the cold is the loneliness. It makes an awful companion. It whispers that I’m not good enough, I’m too freaky, I’m the worst daughter and granddaughter and friend, it tells me there’s no point trying to help my family because I’ll let everyone down – just look what I did to Kyle.
I imagine Nani on the other side of the world with no clue what’s going on, Ma and Dad locked up in cells, Dad screaming to be near Ma. I used to pity him, but maybe his life isn’t so bad. He has one focus, he knows what he wants and he goes for it.
My chest aches from how much I miss them.
In the end we all want the same thing.
Love.
Ma’s words fill my head, ‘Eros looks out for his descendants. If you surrender to love, Eros will find you.’
I glance up at the cloudless sky. Surrender to love. What does it even mean? I clear my throat. ‘Eros, if you’re out there, somewhere, I could really use your help right now.’ I feel silly for even saying it. It’s not like he’s going to descend from Olympus to help me – the girl who hates what he’s made her.
A revving engine booms down the road. I skip off to the side and hide behind a tree. I peek around the trunk and see Pastor Ron’s van approaching. For the first time in an hour, I smile. I tug my gloves down and run from cover, waving like some wild woman.
The van comes to a screeching halt. Ben jumps out. ‘Are you all right?’ His voice is solid, with an edge of relief. He rounds the front and reaches for me. Instinctually, I pull back. Frown lines form around his eyes and I want to kiss them away, to ask him to hold me, to never let me go, but I don’t. I can’t. I step further back.
He backs off too, and opens my door.
‘Thanks for coming for me,’ I say quietly, and climb in.
‘Yeah. It was hard getting away. Marissa wasn’t exactly thrilled to be left with Kyle.’ He smiles, but it never makes it to his eyes. ‘I’m glad you’re OK.’ He closes the door and goes around to his side. It’s warm in here and I start to thaw.
He waits for me to put my seatbelt on before starting the van. ‘We lost a lot of time and need to make up for it. I’m going to need to drive as fast as this van will push. Is that OK with you? I don’t like putting you at risk, but right now I think there’s more risk of being caught.’
‘Yes,’ I choke out, still not used to the level of respect I get from Ben.
He turns on the radio and speeds off down the road. Every once in a while, one of us will brave looking at the other. When our eyes lock, I smile and return to looking out the window. Despite the burning beneath my skin, it feels right being back with Ben.
‘We’ll drive until we need gas,’ he says. ‘Then we’ll find a place to refill and grab some food. Kyle only left me with forty bucks, so hopefully that can get us to the border.’
‘The border?’ I blurt, then realize he’s still following our old plan of escaping the police in Mexico. He doesn’t know about New York.
‘It’s a good plan and when we find somewhere to stop we can ask them to reroute us to the nearest crossing.’
I nod; there’s no point arguing with him until I can come up with a way to get into New York that avoids all the traffic cams Ben warned us of. Besides, maybe there was something to Kyle’s wanting to separate. Maybe I should leave Ben in Mexico and travel on, on my own. I hate the idea of being away from him again, but it’s the only way I can think to keep him safe.
I grab my cell and plug it into the cord hanging from the dash. It flashes to life. I search to see if Paisley is online – she isn’t, but Marissa is. My finger hovers over her name, tempted to press call and check in on them, but also not wanting to hear her voice.
The phone rings and for a second I think I accidently pushed the button until I realize it’s her who’s calling. I hold it up to Ben. ‘Do I answer?’
He shrugs.
I decide to, just in case it’s important. ‘Hello?’
‘Rachel, hi. Should we keep going to Mexico or did the swap change things?’ Marissa asks.
‘Say hi to Rachel for me, my love,’ Kyle says in the background.
‘Wait.’ I fumble the phone in my shaky, gloved hands. ‘Why did Kyle call you “my love”?’
‘I dunno, Rachel. Do we continue to Mexico or not?’
I grip the phone tighter. ‘Answer me. Wh y did Kyle call you “my love”?’
She sighs. ‘I don’t know … Maybe because you can’t take a joke and I knew you wouldn’t have the lady balls to fix it. I felt bad and did it for you. I turned him and told him to stop treating you like crap. You’re welcome.’
‘You what?’ I should be happy that Kyle doesn’t hate me any more, but I’m not. I feel selfish and broken and so worried for him. ‘Promise me you didn’t turn him. Marissa, promise me this is a joke!’ All of me shakes now, not just my hands. When she doesn’t answer. I bite my lip to keep from shouting. I put the phone on speaker, leaning back, not wanting to touch it and be any closer to her than needed.
‘Don’t worry, my powers will wear off in a couple days. Then he’ll go back to his normal friendly self, but this time with his Rachel-loving side. It’s not that big a deal.’
Ben shakes his head and offers me a look of sympathy. ‘Where,’ he clears his throat, ‘where are you guys?’
‘Hi, Ben!’ Her voice picks up. ‘I’m not sure – it’s al
most dark here so it’s hard to read street signs.’
A loud thumping static comes over the line.
Ben frowns and leans closer to the phone. ‘Can you turn down your radio? I can’t hear over the bass.’
‘It’s not the radio …’ The sound overpowers Marissa.
Ben frowns and pulls the van over, putting us in park. ‘Hello?’
I grab the phone, checking to see if the volume’s maxed. It is, but it beeps the low battery reminder, so I plug it back in.
‘Riss? What’s happening?’
‘What is that?’ she says.
‘Marissa, what do you see?’ Ben leans over to ask.
‘There’s a spotlight …’ She pauses and the thumping gets louder. ‘I can barely hear you guys. Speak up—’
A high-pitched scream interrupts, and it takes a moment to realize it’s their brakes.
‘Kyle, look out—’ Marissa’s cry blasts through the phone speaker.
‘Hang on, my love!’ Kyle yells.
I take the phone, ignoring the battery warning. ‘What’s happening?’
‘Road block, police barricade, the noise … helicopter.’ Marissa sounds frightened, confused.
‘They found them.’ Ben turns to me. ‘We have to get out of here. Now!’
‘Rachel, this … Kyle, watch out!’
There’s a harmony of shouts, the squeal of tyres, popping metal. I glance at Ben, nearly dropping my cell when shattering glass and crunching bone come through the line too.
‘Marissa?’
The speaker blasts an eerie hissing sound.
‘Marissa! Marissa?’ I try to breathe but my lungs refuse to cooperate, and my hands shake so bad that I hand Ben the phone.
He puts his ear to the speaker, holding a finger to his lips.
That’s when I hear Marissa cough.
‘Rach? Rachel …’ Her words slur out. ‘Rach? Oh god!’
I ignore Ben’s look warning me to keep quiet. ‘I’m here, Riss. What’s happening? Are you OK?’
‘Rach, we don’t have much time. They’re coming … I’ve done so much – Ben, Kyle, all the mean shit I pulled …’ She wheezes in a breath. ‘I was jealous of you … of your relationship with your mom and your strength and … I promise to do better, be better …’ She stops to cough again, her breathing raspy. ‘Rachel, you’re my best friend. The … only one who has stuck with me …’
‘Riss, just tell me what’s happening, where are you? We’re coming to get you!’
I glance at Ben, eyes full of worry.
‘My love? Are you all right, my love? Leave her alone!’ Kyle’s voice is unsteady, but other than the fact he keeps calling Marissa ‘my love’, he doesn’t sound injured.
I grab the phone back, holding it out so Ben can hear, and get out of the van for some fresh air.
‘Rachel, we have to go now.’ Ben waves me over. ‘Hang up and get back in the van!’
‘But …?’
‘We can’t help them if we get caught too.’
He’s right. I hate to admit it – even more so, I hate to leave Marissa and Kyle. But all we can do now is get to a safe place and come up with a plan. ‘We’ll come back for you,’ I say, hoping Marissa and Kyle can still hear. My hands tremble as I hold the phone out to him. I won’t be the one to hang up. I can’t be.
Ben takes it from me, turns it off, smashing it on the sill until it splits in two, then throws it out the window.
‘What if they try to get in touch, or Paisley’s ma calls with news?’
‘That’s exactly what I’m worried about. We’ve taken one too many gambles with the phones. I have no doubt the police will look up their last call. Listen, Rach, they’re alive, that’s all that matters.’
Everything in me wants to go after them, to help them, but Ben’s right. We need to be smart. I’m surprised by how much I care about Marissa and Kyle after everything they’ve done to hurt me. Especially Marissa. I can’t believe she turned Kyle.
‘Why?’ I mumble, as I put on my seatbelt and close the door.
Ben pulls back on the road. ‘I don’t know why, accidents happen …’
‘I mean, why did she have to turn Kyle?’
He shrugs, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows. ‘People do strange things when they’re scared.’
I allow myself to make eye contact with him. His unbending eyes hold mine where his body can’t, and somehow it’s enough.
We drive in silence down the deserted road for over an hour. Not one car passes us. Even though we’re in the middle of god know knows where, the further we get from the police the more relieved I feel.
‘I hope we find something soon,’ Ben says.
I send him a quizzical look.
‘We’re low on gas, and I’m starving.’
‘I’m hungry too.’
A couple hours ago I didn’t even want to look at food. All the stuff with Kyle and Marissa left me sick to my stomach. But the safety of Ben lets me relax enough to feel the hunger. Last time I ate was at the diner.
Arrow iner flashes through my head.
That sign was an odd coincidence. I can’t help wondering if it was a sign sign, the kind my mother spoke of. And if so, I wish I knew what it meant. Marissa would tell me it meant to embrace my gift, to be who I was created to be. I can’t argue that it would be easier sometimes – if only my power didn’t scare me so much. I glance at Ben, wondering what it would feel like to kiss him, and even just thinking about it alights my power within me. I’m burning up, so hot and fast that I have to take my cardigan off to cool down. I lean into the door, away from Ben, and any chance of my power erupting. The fear is too real.
I remember the frightened look on Paisley’s victim’s face, the red-haired boy, who freaked out on live TV and said otherworldly creatures took him. He was beyond fear, and the reporter believed him. Everyone in New York is probably still hunting for the alien that abducted their boys, which can’t help our current predicament. I should be there too – doing whatever it takes for my parents. No matter how scared it makes me.
Fearing what I am has kept me from too many things. If only my ability could control fear, it would be a lot more helpful than the stupid love curse.
‘Control fear?’ I whisper, sitting up in my seat, suddenly knowing what to do to help my family.
‘What?’ Ben glances over.
‘How much further to the border?’ I ask.
He shrugs. ‘We don’t have GPS and someone broke your phone so we can’t check.’
‘Someone?’
He laughs. ‘My guess is twelve hours or so, that’s if we’re going in the right direction. The sun’s setting behind us so we’re travelling east. Why?’
‘I have a plan.’
‘Oh yeah?’ He smiles at me.
‘I’m going to turn myself in.’
He laughs.
‘I mean it. It’s the only way.’
He falters. ‘You’re serious?’
‘Yes.’
The van swerves a little. Ben rights it again and turns to look at me. ‘Rach, you need to think this through.’
‘I have.’
‘I doubt that,’ he says, eyes facing forward once more.
‘What motivates you?’ I ask.
‘What does this have to do with your plan?’
‘Just answer me, Ben.’
‘I don’t know … love?’ he half-heartedly replies.
‘This whole mess makes me realize, it isn’t love – I mean yes, it’s a factor, but fear is one too. For me anyway.’
‘Fear?’ He works his jaw, keeping his eyes on the road. ‘So fear is your big plan?’
‘I’m going to use it to get the police to listen to me.’
‘Oh yeah, you’re going to march up to them and tell them a scary story?’
It’s a joke, he’s smiling, but he won’t be when he hears the rest. I’m not even confident it will work, or that I want to do it. But if there’s ever a time to do something wr
ong, it’s now. I take a deep breath. ‘I’ll turn myself in, tell them I’m one of those vampire aliens. I’ll make a big scene of it, so there are witnesses.’
Ben looks at me, a little too quickly because he swerves the van again in the process.
‘If I confess to all the other abductions and everything, my family and Marissa can go free. I’m going to say I forced them to do it, brainwashed them.’
‘No one will believe you.’
‘I have to try.’
He sighs, his eyes staring forward but never connecting with the road. ‘Rachel, you can’t—’
‘What other option do we have?’
‘What about you?’ He glances at me, his eyes so full of determination that it makes me hold my breath. ‘They don’t deserve what you’re offering. Did you even think of what they’ll do to you when you’re arrested? You’re telling them you’re supernatural. That’s not something they’ll ignore.’
He’s right, I know it’s a risk. I’m scared shitless about it. But what other choice do I have? ‘It’s my family, my best friend. I have to do something.’
His shoulders droop and he lets out a long breath. ‘What about me? Where do I fit into your plan?’
I pause, taking in the weight of his words. What about him? I can’t very well tell him everything – that he’s the reason why I’m doing this. That he’s the one who taught me how to put others first, even when it’s uncomfortable, even when it goes against what I believe in. ‘I’ll drop you at the border and turn back.’
‘Turn back?’
‘I’m going to New York.’ I lift my chin. ‘There isn’t another way.’
‘You’re just going to do this all on your own? Do you even know how to get there?’
‘I’ll figure it out,’ I say, looking out the side window so he can’t see the fear in my eyes. He doesn’t answer, but I watch him in the reflection and the way his jaw flexes and his eyes dart across the road, I can tell he’s thinking. And whatever he’s thinking is causing him to grip the steering wheel so hard his knuckles blanch. I understand, though – it isn’t exactly like going to jail is something I want. But if I can save them … one life for several – it’s the only option that makes sense.