I decide to check out the famous busts that line the room. As I walk around, I once again get lost in thoughts of impending fatherhood. Veronica has definitely made me a better person, but my own childhood wasn’t very ideal and I don’t want to project any of this onto my child.
I go deeper into the library as I delve further and further into my mind. Sometime later, I hear someone shouting my name. I run out and see Veronica’s dad rushing over to me. I go towards him quickly.
“What is it?”
My thoughts immediately go to Veronica, thinking the worst.
“It’s Veronica,” her dad confirms my worst fear. “We think her water broke. Looks like the baby’s coming.”
It doesn’t sound as bad as I was fearing. Still, I’m stunned for a second, unable to move or speak. Veronica’s dad notices this and pushes me in the direction of my wife.
We reach her and she’s steadying herself against a table, breathing heavily. I go to her aide and place my arms around her.
“I’m fine,” she says through labored breaths. “I just think the baby wants out.”
She gives me a small laugh and it warms my heart to see her in such a jovial mood. Another patron comes over and lets us know she called the hospital and there’s an ambulance on the way. We thank her and wait.
“Don’t you think it’s a little early, though?” she asks me.
I see the strain on her face mixed with worry.
“I’m sure everything’s going to be okay,” I try to reassure her. “The doctor back home didn’t note anything concerning. The baby probably can’t wait to see us.”
Even as I say this to her, I find myself filling with some dread. Seven months is a bit early. I try not to dwell on it and we wait for the paramedics to arrive.
It doesn’t take them long and soon Veronica’s in the back of the ambulance. Only one of us can ride with her, so her parents say they’ll meet us at the hospital. The paramedics close the doors and we’re on our way.
I do my best to comfort her. I hold her hand and say all the reassuring things I can think of. She offers me a smile and I know my words are getting through. Even in the midst of this chaos, I’m glad I can be a calming presence for my wife.
We make it to the hospital in one piece and Veronica is rushed to the Maternity Ward. They tell me to wait outside, so I take a seat on a bench in the hallway.
I guess this place is old fashioned; in the US, I know they would let me go in with her. I do my best to try to figure out what’s going on from the bench to which I’ve been vanquished, but the doctors and nurses are speeding past and don’t have much time to tell me anything. So, I sit and wait for Veronica’s parents.
They soon arrive and ask me all kinds of questions and I can’t answer most of them, so Veronica’s mom goes to talk to a nurse while I sit, feeling a little defeated. Her dad plops himself beside me, aware of my current state of distress.
“I’m sure everything is going to be just fine. My girl has got our family’s fighting spirit and she will pull through. I just know it. And that baby of yours will too, since we’re all one big family.”
“It’s not that,” I tell him. “I mean, that’s a part of it, but there’s also… I’ve just been having these doubts all day about how I’ll be as a father and if I’ll be any good and blah, blah, blah. I left Veronica alone. I left her all alone.”
I’m distraught. Getting wrapped up in my head letting all the dark thoughts make their way to the front.
“Listen, son,” her dad reassures me. “You didn’t leave Veronica alone. You were there when she needed you and you’re here now. All parents have their doubts. Raising a child is one of the hardest tasks out there and if you went in with all the confidence in the world, that’s what would be concerning. All you can do is be the best version of yourself.”
He gives me a small pat on the back and goes to join Veronica’s mom at the counter. I think about what he’s said and it resonates with me. I’m glad I get along with Veronica’s parents, even though at first they understandably didn’t approve of our unorthodox way of “meeting.”
It takes a few hours before we get any updates. One of the doctors who took Veronica away earlier reappears and I jump up to talk to her.
“Doctor, is my wife okay?”
The doctor offers me a warm smile and proceeds to tell me the news.
“Everything went smoothly,” she says. “The labor was a bit long and intensive, but we were able to stabilize your wife and the baby was delivered safely and healthily.”
The relief that washes over me is so strong that I almost collapse.
“We would like to keep them both for observation,” the doctor continues. “Especially the baby, given that she is a little early.”
“She?”
Veronica and I had decided not to know the gender of the baby before delivery, so it’s all a surprise to me.
“Oh, I’m afraid I’ve let the cat out the bag,” the doctor says. “Yes, you are the father of a brand new baby girl.”
A baby girl. I have a daughter.
“Would you like to go see them now?” the doctor asks.
I nod, speechless. The doctor motions for me to follow her. Veronica’s parents try to follow, but the doctor requests that I be the only one to come to the back for now. I leave them behind in the waiting room and go to see my wife and baby daughter.
Veronica
A little baby girl. She’s so precious… and small. I’m afraid I’ll harm her just by breathing on her. And I can’t stop nuzzling her with my nose.
Her soft skin against mine is comforting and I don’t want to break the contact. Even though my body is completely tired, I just want to spend all my time staring at this bundle of joy.
I look up when I see the doctor return and notice she’s accompanied by Isaac. My sweet, sweet Isaac. He looks so worried.
I smile, hoping to assuage his anxieties. He’s by my side in an instant, showering kisses on my face.
“Are you okay?” he asks me.
I laugh because once again he’s forgotten how ticklish I am and his beard is all over my face.
“I’m fine. Look at her,” I say softly, motioning towards the baby in my arms. He turns to our daughter and his tense shoulders finally relax. “Do you want to hold her?”
He nods and I pass her on to him. I watch father and daughter meet for the first time and my heart soars. I could tell he’d been having doubts about becoming a father even if he didn’t share them with me. But the love in his eyes is so immense. I hope he finally feels confident in his ability to be a good father.
He takes a seat on the bed beside me and we both fawn over our little girl.
“What are we going to name her?” Isaac looks at me, waiting for my input. It’s funny how we hadn’t really settled on a name. We threw some back and forth, but none were confirmed. I can see him thinking.
“Remember, that one name?” he asks. “What was it… Flannery.”
I nod. An Irish name seems appropriate given where she was born. I had suggested it because of one of my favorite writers, Flannery O’Connor, but now the name holds even more significance.
“Doesn’t it mean red bravery?” Isaac asks me.
“Too on the nose?” I ask him back, looking down at the little tuft of red curls already sprouting from her head.
“No, it’s perfect,” he says.
And it is. She is.
Our little Flannery. Our baby girl.
Three Months Later
Isaac
It’s been three months since Flannery was born and it’s our first night out, just the two of us. Veronica has been by Flannery’s side all this time, but I feel it’s a good time to go on a date.
She’s a bit hesitant, but Lily, the family member we met in Ireland, as well as Veronica’s parents, are babysitting. Veronica’s dad had to run some errands, so only her mom and Lily are in the room to listen to Veronica’s instructions.
I can hear Veronic
a giving them all the information they will need to look after the baby. She’s trying to see if she’s forgotten anything and I can tell she’s on the verge of backing out of our date.
“Veronica.”
She turns to me when I call her name. She looks so beautiful, wearing a simple black dress. Her hair hangs loose, surrounding her face.
“Yes, Isaac.”
The way she says my name is so deliberate, I choose my next words with caution.
“I think your mom and Lily are more than capable of taking care of Flannery for one night. Plus, your dad will be here soon and between the three of them, the night cannot go wrong.”
I can tell I chose the right words because she relaxes a little, taking in my words.
“I know. It’s just, it’s our first time leaving her with someone else for so long and I’m a little anxious.”
Lily walks over to Veronica and places an arm around her.
“I promise, your daughter is in the best hands. We’ll look after the wee lass.”
Veronica gives Lily a hug and thanks her. We say our goodbyes, hovering over Flannery for a bit longer than necessary. Then we get into the car and head over to the restaurant. I love my little girl but I’m thrilled to be having a date with my leading lady.
Veronica
Isaac is concentrating on driving us to our destination. There isn’t much conversation happening, probably because he doesn’t want to reveal where we are going. I know if I press him enough, he’ll tell me where it is, but I don’t want to ruin his surprise.
The silence doesn’t bother me any way. Isaac is one of the few people who I can comfortably sit quietly with and feel perfectly content rather than anxious. We arrive at an extremely upscale restaurant and I immediately feel out of place. We haven’t even set foot inside yet.
“Wow, this place looks really fancy…”
It’s making me a little nervous. I fidget with the hem of my dress, worried I haven’t donned clothes nice enough for the occasion. Isaac places his hand over mine to get me to stop moving so much.
“You look perfect.”
He looks directly into my eyes as he says this and I know he thinks I look beautiful. And that’s more than enough for me. We leave our car with the valet and go inside. It’s dimly lit, adding to the romantic atmosphere.
We’re led to a more private table in the back. The waiter leaves us to look over the menu.
“Anything look good?” Isaac asks me
I look up from my intense reading of the menu and find him observing me with a look of amusement. I counter with a small smile.
“I’m weighing my options.”
He nods, used to how I operate. My first and last and only lover. My husband. The father of my children. My best friend. He knows everything about me and I love that he does.
“And you?” I ask him. “Anything you’d recommend?”
“What I want to eat isn’t on the menu.”
His features darken and I can tell by the velvety nature of his voice the kind of suggestion he’s making. I blush, a little embarrassed. Thankfully, no one can hear us.
Even though we’ve been together for a while, Isaac can still make me swoon. And he knows it.
“Must you be so wicked?”
He lets out a chuckle at my turn of phrase. Before he can respond, the waiter returns and we both order. I get pasta with white sauce and Isaac goes for a steak. When the waiter leaves, Isaac is right back to his wicked self.
“You know… I reserved us a hotel room nearby.”
I’m a little confused because we have to return home. There’s no we can spend the night. But it’s as if Isaac has read my mind.
“It’s not really for the night…” He explains, and raises an eyebrow.
It finally dawns on me what he’s hinting at. I look down, twisting my hands in my lap.
“The doctor has said I’m all good to go in terms of being more physically active…” I look back up at him and see concern in his eyes.
I must be coming across nervous, which I am. Nervous, with my own husband. As if it’s our very first time all over again.
“I am a little nervous since it’s been… a while,” I tell him.
Isaac reaches across the table and offers me his hand which I happily take.
“I know it’s a little early and we can do as little or as much as you want. We can take it nice and slow.”
“No, no. I don’t want you to use kid gloves with me. You don’t need to hold back.” I give his hands a little squeeze. “I don’t want you to. No helicopter husbanding, remember?”
Isaac smiles. He looks pleased that I don’t want him to be too gentle with me. I know he likes it rough, as do I… usually. I just hope I’m totally ready for whatever he has in store for me.
The waiter comes back with our food and we dig in. We chat, avoiding our previous topic. I mean, everything that needed to be said has been said, right?
Either way, I don’t want Isaac to feel I’m too anxious. He might end the evening right then and there. And I have missed having him inside me. I need it, even if I’m nervous. I’m ready, to finally be possessed by my husband again.
Isaac
We eat and talk, but don’t bring up the topic again. I can’t tell if Veronica’s more nervous or excited. I don’t want her to feel like I’m rushing her.
Maybe a surprise hotel room wasn’t a good idea… It was kind of like setting up my expectations without asking her first. It’s just our first night out in a while and I wanted to make it special. We finish our meals and the waiter comes to clear our plates.
“Would you like to view our dessert menu?” he asks.
Before I can get one syllable out, Veronica has an answer ready.
“No, thank you. We’re getting dessert somewhere else.”
She winks at me, and I try not to let my mouth fall open.
The waiter nods and tells us he’ll be back with our check. I lean in to get closer to Veronica.
“What was that?” I ask her.
She gives me a mischievous smile in return.
“Well, Hubby,” she says, with another wink. “I distinctly remember you saying what you want to eat isn’t on the menu and I thought for dessert I could give what you really want.”
The waiter returns with our check and I get us out of there as quickly as possible. The valet brings our car around and I drive as fast as legally allowed, maybe even a little faster, to get us to the hotel. All the while, Veronica is laughing at my exaggerated display of enthusiasm.
We’re finally standing outside the hotel room and I push the door open. Veronica enters ahead of me and takes in the room. It’s a little extravagant, but I wanted to go all out. I close the door behind me and lean against it. Veronica turns around and takes a seat on the edge of the bed.
“Do I need to invite you over?” she asks, grinning at me.
I slowly walk over to her and reach the edge of the mattress. I kneel in front of her. Her eyes follow my descent.
I take one of her legs in my hands and remove her heel. I give it a small throw over my shoulder and this gets me a small smirk. I repeat the action with the other shoe. I run my hand up her leg to her lower thigh.
“Why don’t you put your feet up on the bed?”
She moves back so that her full body is on top of the mattress. I stand up and loosen my tie.
“Let me.”
Veronica moves over to me and kneels on the bed. She gently grabs my tie and unties it. She leaves it hanging around my collar and places her hand softly on the side of my face.
“Thank God, you shaved.”
She leaves kisses along my jawline. As she kisses my face, her hands make quick work of removing my jacket and unbuttoning my dress shirt. Her mouth moves down to my neck and then to my shoulders. I can tell the trajectory she’s aiming for and so I lift her face back up to mine.
Tonight is the time for me to please her. My loving wife. Who carried and delivered our child and
who deserves to be treated like the princess she is.
Veronica
Isaac starts by kissing my neck. He even licks it, drawing a giggle out of me.
“Is something funny?” He asks, his voice muffled by my neck.
“Your tongue just tickles. You seem to forget how ticklish I am.”
He takes his mouth away from my neck and presses his forehead against mine.
“I do, don’t I?”
Before I answer, he lightly settles his lips against mine, testing the waters. I kiss him back with more force and he reciprocates by wrapping his hand in my hair and pressing me into him.
My body is flush against his and I can feel how hard he is. His tongue darts out and coaxes my jaw open. I moan into his mouth. I entwine my hands in his hair and pull him down on top of me.
Surprised by my sudden forcefulness, he has to catch himself with his arms. They end up on either side of my head and he’s hovering above me, scanning my body.
“Undressing me with your eyes?” I add with a playful lilt in my voice and a wiggle of my brows. For some reason, all this sensualness is making me giddy.
“I’d rather undress you with my hands,” he says.
I bring myself up into a sitting position, so he can reach the zipper at the back of my dress. He brings it down slowly and once I’m completely unzipped; Isaac slips the dress off my shoulders and exposes my bra.
“Looks like someone dressed for the occasion,” he says, his arched eyebrow presenting a more questioning tone.
“Maybe you weren’t the only one with… intentions this evening.”
This coaxes another smile out of him and he gives me a quick kiss. His hands then go and remove my bra, giving him full view of my breasts.
“Just be careful,” I tell him, not wanting to ruin the mood but also not wanting to be in too much pain to continue our fun. “They’re still a little sensitive from breastfeeding.”
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