“Perhaps you were lucky,” Taran mused, his brow furrowed with deep lines. “Unless the thing tracked her.” He watched me as he spoke and noted the flicker of concern. “Are you worried for her, Elian?”
“Not particularly,” I lied, taking another drink. “She’s perfectly capable of handling the creature without my assistance. But, surely, if it can hunt her, it puts us at a disadvantage?”
Taran nodded his agreement. “Indeed, it does. How would you like to proceed?”
I didn’t quite understand the question. There was no other way to proceed. They had their hands full and the demon knew she was hunting him. “We’re fine as we are for the time being, I think.”
“Are you certain, Elian? If you require any assistance, I’m sure we could assign another Druid or two to the task, to assist…”
“No, thank you,” I said quickly. I realised that I didn’t want anyone else’s involvement. I had no wish to share her.
Taran frowned. “Elian, there is a very good chance that she will return to her home. I implore you not to become attached.”
“I’m not attached,” I muttered as Taran eyed me. I cleared my throat before explaining. “Another Druid to concern herself with would complicate matters further. She prefers to work alone. I don’t want her preoccupied with keeping others safe. If this is the demon that killed her, and I suspect that it is, things are complicated enough. We’ll handle it.”
An uncomfortable silence fell between us, and Taran studied me as I berated myself for my mistake. After a few minutes, I drained my glass and asked, “How do you propose to send her home?”
“I’m sure you know that my grandson, Zander, is an earth wielder. He is immensely powerful and has capabilities we did not expect for such a young age. There is a strong possibility that he can restore the tree, giving her a home to return to,” he explained.
My brows rose in surprise. “That is good news. I’m sure she’ll be thrilled.”
I would have said more, but the door to the study opened and Dagda strode in. “Excuse me, Father. Elian, your nymph as run off.”
“She’s what?” I jumped up and placed my glass on a valuable looking sideboard. “Where to?”
Dagda shrugged. “Dunno. Shall we go and find her?”
“No. I’ll find her” I said curtly, turning back to Taran. “If there’s nothing else, sire, I really should go before she gets herself into some sort of trouble.”
“Of course. She can handle this alone, Elian. I have every confidence. But if you feel the need to be present…”
With a very small bow, I turned and strode from the room, Dagda close behind me.
“Can you take me back?” I asked urgently when the study doors were closed.
“Yeah. She’s fine, Elian. She isn’t likely to bump into it in broad daylight, is she?”
“She isn’t fine, Dagda. She came face to face with him and locked up! I don’t know what’s going on with her, but it’s looking like this is the demon that killed her. She needs some extra time. I was going to get her back out there tomorrow and see what we can find. If he finds her first, and she freezes again…” I didn’t finish. I couldn’t.
Dagda gripped my shoulder and took me back to the city.
“You’re a mile from home. Fly back. Calm yourself down. She’ll be fine, El. You have my number if you need me. I’ll be down here. I’m staying with my girlfriend.”
“Thanks,” I said, clapping him on the arm before I shifted and took to the skies.
I’d asked her not to leave. I’d asked her to stay where she was. Why would she put herself at risk like this? Why hadn’t she listened? Where could she be?
The questions repeated over and over with each beat of my wings. I wasn’t even sure where to look for her. The river? The warehouses?
I decided to go home on the off chance she had gone back. It was best to start there and work my way out.
With nothing but open skies and the sound of the wind to distract me, I allowed myself to think back to Taran’s warning. It was a warning. Do not become attached. It was certainly too late for that. What had I done? What had I allowed them to lead me into? I couldn’t allow it. I wouldn’t allow myself…
My building was visible in the distance. The lights were on in her room. My concern grew to a steady, burning anger. She’d deliberately ignored me!
I landed on her balcony and listened carefully. The bath was running. I decided to wait outside for a while. She was safe. I was angry. Better to cool off before I went inside. I didn’t want to say the wrong thing. Do the wrong thing. I had to ask what she was thinking. I had to know why she didn’t heed my warning.
Then I wondered why I gave a shit.
I was out there for well over an hour, stewing in my temper, before I heard the bath empty. That was when I shifted and opened the patio door. That was when she came out of her bathroom and looked straight at me as the door banged shut behind me.
Ten
Seren
Elian was furious. The emotion surrounded him like a thick fog. I shouldn’t have left. I knew that. The Druid said she’d tell him. I’d accepted that and was prepared to explain, to apologise, but I hadn’t expected this reaction.
Even if I couldn’t have felt his fury, the look in his eyes spoke volumes. The soft, kind eyes I’d come to know were gone. The windows to his caring soul, closed and shuttered; hard and cold.
I took a step away and felt the wooden door frame at my back. I sidestepped, the flat surface of the wall supporting me as I shrank away from him.
“You left.”
I flinched at the guttural sound of his voice, and opened my mouth to reply, but no sound came out. Instead, I felt my bottom lip quiver and I bit down on it, swallowing hard. My instinct was to flee, to get away from the angry man closing in on me. I searched his eyes for a sign of my Elian, my friend, companion, and protector. I searched for a sign of the real him and found nothing.
Clearing my throat, I managed to squeak, “I…I was bored. I only went for tea…”
He stopped before me and I was trapped. The wall at my back, him at my front; I had no way of escaping the confrontation. I closed my eyes and fought to steady my racing heart. To gather my senses and find a way to calm him down.
He was so close I could smell his aftershave. I looked up at him, pressing a hand against his chest and pushed. He didn’t move. I raised my other hand, my palm sliding over the contours of his toned body, and pushed harder.
His response was to grasp my wrists and push them up, pinning them beside my head. I lifted my chin in defiance, about to shout a protest when he leaned his forehead against mine and whispered, “If he’d found you…”
I pushed again, and he moved back slightly, our eyes meeting. They’d changed. No longer hard, no longer cold. They burned. The anger was still there, but another emotion had taken over. Worry. He was so deeply concerned for my safety, he’d responded with anger. I gasped as his emotions shifted again and a new, unfamiliar emotion rushed me, overpowering all else. I blinked several times as I tried to fathom what it was, utterly confused.
His face only an inch from mine, I caught the slightest hint of something sweet on his breath before he closed the tiny space between us. Our lips touched, and despite myself, I moved closer, my stomach turning over, flip-flopping in time with the thundering beats of my heart. I pressed myself into him, a deep moan escaping my throat. His mouth never left mine as he increased the firm grip on my wrists, raising them above my head, using one strong hand to keep them in place.
I sighed at his touch as he trailed the fingers of his free hand along my jawline. My lips parted, begging for more, his tongue searching for mine. I reciprocated, arching my back as his arm wrapped tightly around me, his knee sliding between my legs, pressing his body closer to mine. I lost myself in him, allowed him to wash over me completely, to flood my senses and render me entirely at his mercy.
His emotions pounded into me and I drank them in. Recognised th
em as the very ones I was stifling. Feelings we shared. Feelings we were denying, hiding. One word overpowered all others as I named them one by one in my mind. The one I knew was as destructive as it was creative. They merged, fuelled our passion rather than draining my energy. This was more than a kiss. In shocked realisation, I turned my head and he moved back, releasing my hands. They fell to his chest and I lowered my head. His ragged breathing matched my own as I fought to control myself, to arrange my racing, stumbling thoughts.
I flicked my tongue over my bottom lip, tasting him there. He leaned forward, and I held my breath, desperate for the feel of his lips against mine. Instead, he dipped his chin, rested his forehead against mine, cupping my cheek in his hand.
“Don’t ever put yourself at risk like that again.”
My mouth went dry as he pushed himself away from the wall, away from me, and turned. I watched him leave, a lump forming in my throat. I covered my mouth with my hand to stifle the sob that threatened to escape me.
I didn’t want him to leave. I couldn’t be alone again. Not now. Not after he’d stirred these emotions in me; forced me to recognise them. To admit they existed.
As my bedroom door closed behind him, I sank to the ground, back against the wall and allowed hot tears to streak down my face. Hugging my knees, I replayed the scene over and over in my mind; the feelings he invoked in me, the feelings that pulsed from him. The passion behind his kiss.
How had I missed it? How had I hidden my emotions, even from myself?
The most worrying question of all, how would this affect my ability to handle Kern? I knew now that I couldn’t risk him harming Elian. If anything happened to him, I could never forgive myself.
I climbed into bed. I turned and tossed all night, my racing thoughts refusing to let me sleep. I considered going to him. Explaining myself to him. Apologising to him. I even made it to his bedroom door, hand poised to knock, and thought better of it, returning to the solitude of my own.
I opened the blinds and returned to bed, content to lie and look at the moon. I’d missed it, I realised, as I searched for the familiar shadows cast by the contours of its surface. It reminded me of home. My old home. The one I had no wish to return to. Against my better judgment, I admitted this was my home. Whether I could keep it as such or not. I wanted to be here, with him.
I smiled sadly to myself, at the foolishness of my wishful thinking.
Eleven
Elian
It took everything I had to leave that room. I heard a small sob break from her and felt my body tense. The urge to turn back, to hold her, to kiss her again, was agonising. I fought it. I couldn’t. I should never have touched her in the first place.
Shit. I mouthed the word as I shoved my way into my own room. “Shit!” I muttered into the empty space. As I stood there, in the darkness of my bedroom, I cursed myself for what I’d just done. I’d more than blurred the line. I’d scrubbed it out. That was not supposed to happen.
I could still taste her. I could still hear her soft, enticing moan. The intoxicating smell of her clung to my clothes. I couldn’t bear it.
I closed my eyes and rubbed at my face. I could still feel her against me, the way her body responded to my touch, igniting a response in my own.
If she hadn’t pulled away when she did…
I barged into the bathroom and turned on the shower. “Fuck, Elian!” I chastised myself as I tore out of my clothes and kicked them into the corner of the room. Turning down the temperature of the water, hoping the cold would shock me out of the state she’d riled me into, the image of her flooded my thoughts.
That smile. She was so pleased to see me, relieved that I was there, that I’d come home to her. That was what broke me.
No. No, that couldn’t be it. She backed away. She pushed me away.
But she reciprocated, meeting my lust with passion of her own.
Why did I leave her sobbing? I shouldn’t have walked away, but I didn’t dare go back.
I left the freezing water and wrapped a towel around my waist. I certainly couldn’t go to her dressed like this. I smiled at the thought and quickly pushed it away. No. I had to stay well clear of her, until morning at least. I couldn’t avoid her forever. She was living here.
I climbed into bed and gazed out the window, my focus on a single star. I huffed a laugh at the irony and rolled onto my back, an arm tucked behind my head. She was certainly bright enough.
I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t stop my thoughts. I considered going out, a lap or two of the city would help clear my head, but I didn’t want to leave her there alone.
Her door opened quietly, and I listened as she stopped outside my own. I hoped she would open it, I held my breath in anticipation of her hand moving the handle. Then her door closed.
She almost came to me. To slap me? For comfort? I would never know. But she came. I closed my eyes and tried to sleep.
Twelve
Seren
I wasn’t sure what time it was when I woke up, so I dressed and straightened my bed before listening at the bedroom door. He wasn’t awake yet, and if he was, he wasn’t out there.
Shaking my head, I opened the door, not entirely sure why I’d bothered listening for him. He lived here. I had to face him at some point. With a deep breath, I left the room and walked straight to the kitchen. He wasn’t there.
Flicking on the kettle, I busied myself making drinks. While the tea bags were self-explanatory, coffee granules were something baffling. Unsure of how, exactly, to make the drink, I settled for one spoon of the brown lumps and poured on the water. It smelled as it did when Elian prepared it, and I smiled at my achievement carrying my own drink to the table. Leaving it there, I carried his to his room, and knocked softly on the door.
“Elian?”
When there was no reply, I knocked again, and the door slowly opened. He looked exhausted and wasn’t dressed. Noticing his bare chest, I fixed my eyes on his face.
“I, um…I made you a drink.”
His eyes instantly brightened, and he took the mug. “Thanks. I’ll be out in a few.”
I nodded and returned to the table.
I stared into my mug, lost in my thoughts. We had to get back to the task in hand. We needed to get this done, then I had to leave. If there was nowhere for me, perhaps I could settle somewhere quiet and live out the rest of my time here. However long that would be.
“You’re up early,” he said quietly as he crossed to the kitchen.
I hadn’t heard his door open, and startled at the sound of his voice. “Yeah, I umm, well, I didn’t sleep very well, so I thought it better to just get up.”
I watched him rinse out his mug and flick the kettle back on. “No, neither did I. Sleep well, I mean. Seren, I’m—”
I didn’t want to discuss it. I didn’t want to think about it. I’d done enough of that, so I cut him off.
“Elian, please…we should return to our task today. We need to find Kern. Any ideas where to start? Any hives of debauchery worth investigating?”
He was quiet for a moment, busying himself making more coffee. “Well,” he said, sounding much more his usual self, “there is one place I know of, but have never bothered to visit. We could have a look today?” Joining me at the table he added, “Remind me to show you how to make coffee. That was the worst I’ve drunk in a long time. Really. Quite possibly the worst ever.”
I smirked, relieved at his change of mood. “You’re welcome. Since my skills obviously lie outside of the kitchen, I’ll let you make breakfast.”
He’d parked the car a few streets away so as not to draw attention to our activities. I didn’t ask what was in the backpack he hauled from the boot, but it looked heavy.
“The house is used by drug addicts and dealers,” he explained. “I don’t anticipate there being anything to worry about unless he’s there. It’s broad daylight, so we shouldn’t have too much trouble.”
“That isn’t an accurate assumption,” I said quietly.
“He’ll happily wander around in the day, so I’ve learned.”
Elian stopped and turned to me. “What do you mean?”
I cringed. “I spoke to Kern yesterday. I was going to tell you when you came home, but...” I smiled nervously and continued walking as he clenched his jaw.
“Right,” he said flatly. “So, if he is here, we should expect him to put up a bit of a fight.”
I was surprised at his control. He managed to stop at simple annoyance. “What did you talk about?”
“Oh, you know, old times…”
I glanced back to see him clearly waiting for a real answer. “He asked where my pet fox was.”
I heard him snort. “Well, that’s informative.”
“He did invite me to join him in his quest for domination. I declined. He irritated me to the point I almost attacked him there, surrounded by all those people. He left before I could.”
Another sidelong glance told me he was satisfied with my response and he turned down a narrow street. The houses here all appeared to be empty, many of the windows covered with sheets of rusted metal.
“What are we looking for, exactly?” I asked as he slowed.
“Not sure,” he said, casually walking through an open gate and unslinging the backpack. He knelt over it, pulling out several items before resting it on the overgrown lawn. I glanced over his shoulder to see him pick up a handful of knives. “Here,” he said, handing me a small sheathed dagger. “In case.”
I didn’t ask what he thought I needed it for, sliding the dagger into the back pocket of my jeans. I didn’t see where he tucked his own weapons, but none were visible when he turned to me.
“Ready?”
I looked up at the house, at its boarded windows, cracked and damaged masonry, and overgrown garden. It certainly looked the part. With a solemn nod, I made for the door.
The Elder Mother (Riftkeepers Book 4) Page 8