by T Gephart
He laughed, the genuine body shaking rumble escaping his throat as he threw his head back. “You know nobody gives a shit about my love life. I have been dating for years and not once has it ever ended up in a tabloid. I am not famous, remember? So unless Eric is planning on flying down and joining us for this wedding, no one is going to give a rat’s ass about what I’m doing or who I’m doing it with.”
While he might not be in the same league as his brother, he wasn’t the no one he was claiming to be either. “That’s not true. I’ve seen people notice you all the time. You are very pop—”
“I think it’s adorable that you are trying to stroke my ego, but I’m fine with things the way they are.” He stilled me, placing his hands around my waist as he looked into my eyes. “I’m not disappointed that I can go and have a regular life. I don’t want photographers hiding in my bushes or chasing me down a street. And I love that I can be with someone and not have to worry about a reporter going through their trash. So thanks for the words of encouragement, but they aren’t necessary.”
I guess I hadn’t really thought of it that way. There weren’t many artists who walked through the doors at Levin Murphy that didn’t want to be hugely successful, and with that, came the fame—the paparazzi not far behind.
“I just meant.” I closed my mouth wondering exactly what I had meant. “I meant that you really are talented and even though you aren’t famous now, they are going to care very soon.”
It wasn’t a line, or a half-hearted effort to inflate his sense of worth; I genuinely believed it. He worked hard, he turned up to every audition we sent him to, and even did the occasional shitty dog food commercial even though it was a waste of his talent. He was the real deal; he just needed that right role, that right movie, that right something, for everyone else to see it. And I didn’t doubt for a second he didn’t have what it took to be an even bigger success than his brother.
“It’s really sweet that you think so.” He grinned. “But right now, I’m not on anyone’s radar so you don’t need to worry about what we’re doing ending up in the press.”
I shook my head, worried less about TMZ and more about my relatives. Not necessarily the members of my family, but Darla would spill everything she knew if she thought there was anything in it for her. “But people in this town have big mouths.”
“So let them talk.” He tipped his head to the closed door with a smirk. “And think about how much worse would it have been if I made up some bullshit and then they found out the truth later?”
Of course that made sense and he had a very valid point. Which would have been rational if we were dealing with a situation that had any semblance of logic. But I had paid an actor to come home with me to pretend to be my boyfriend and we were currently in the cellar while my family ate dinner upstairs. Nothing about the situation was close to logical.
“You want to grab a bottle of wine before my family thinks we’re down here making out?” I refused to admit he was right, instead avoiding the question entirely as my head tipped to the racks of wine bottles on the side of the wall.
He grabbed a bottle, not bothering to look at the label as he slid it out from its place on the shelf. “Them believing we’re making out probably helps our cause, so maybe we should wait down here longer. You wanna make out just to be authentic?” His grin huge.
Tempted to say yes—because who in their right mind would say no—I shook my head.
“Yeah, let’s not do that.” I pulled the wine from his hand and checked it was acceptable.
Oh for God’s sake, he’d picked a Shiraz.
The night was not going well for me.
“Then after you.” He stretched his arm out toward the door and waited. “Try not to choke for the rest of the night, I’m looking forward to dessert.”
I shook my head, climbing the stairs with the bottle in my hand. “Then try not giving me a heart attack.”
I was convinced I was asking too much.
“SO, ARE YOU EXCITED ABOUT tomorrow’s shopping trip?”
Dinner was over and we moved to the living room for dessert. It meant Melanie could put my niece Anna down for a nap, and the men could watch whatever game was being broadcasted on television.
Tammy, who had largely been quiet during dinner, had secured a spot right next to me on the sofa, daintily dipping her spoon into the icebox pie like I didn’t know she was making eyes at Dave. She might be my mother’s assistant but her loyalty did not extend to me.
“Sure,” I lied, the thought of spending the day elbow deep in diapers and nursery items not my idea of a good time. Still, I loved my sister and was happy she was giving me another niece, so if had to suffer through a few hours at Babies-R-Us to make her happy, then that’s what I’d do.
I was more concerned with leaving Dave unattended, his plans for the day not yet secured.
“I’d be happy to take Dave through Shreveport and give him a tour while you’re gone,” she offered, batting her eyelashes like she was doing me a favor.
“Thanks for the offer, Tammy, but I think he might be doing something with either Dalton or Travis.”
I had no personal feelings against Tammy per se; she was a beautiful twenty-year-old redhead who looked at my mother like she’d hung the moon. She didn’t have family of her own, her drunk momma kicking her out of the house when she was sixteen. And while she did end up living with a wealthy aunt who gave her food and shelter, Tammy got less than zero emotional support or love. It was no wonder she ended up getting validation in other ways. My mom had hired her right out of high school, hoping that not only would she give the poor girl a job but also a sense of family, but old habits die hard and she spent more time on her knees giving blow jobs than she did praising the Lord.
“Well the offer is there.” Her words trailed off as her eyes wandered to where the men were huddled together.
The lure of the large flat screen had proven too much for both Travis and Dalton, my brothers demanding Dave sit with them like they were the T-Birds while they had an in-depth discussion over which college kid was going to be the next NBA superstar. It was equal parts cute and frightening that they wanted to get to know him better, no doubt looking for an opportunity to question him about his intentions.
My mom had decided we needed another curveball thrown into the mix, asking my dad to go pick up my Gran Shelly and bring her to the house to visit. Because it would have been too easy to just wait until tomorrow night or until the wedding on Saturday. No, we needed to parade Dave around like a prized bull for all the family to see. And they wondered why I didn’t usually bring men home with me. My mother was either on to me, and was trying to smoke me out, or she genuinely believed the ruse. I couldn’t confidently guess which yet.
Amy sat on the other side of me, enjoying her pie while she smiled. “He’s really good looking.” The he in the sentence not needing to be clarified. “I can’t believe you have kept him to yourself for so long. Just think, if Gran Shelly hadn’t almost died, we wouldn’t have even known about him.”
Truer words had never been spoken.
“It was new, and kind of still is. I didn’t want to jinx it.” The rote answer fell from my lips with almost no effort.
“Honey, there’s no guarantees in love. Look at me, I’ve been following your brother for who knows how long and I’m still waiting for him to get down on one knee,” she said with a tired sigh. “I know he loves me, and there’s no question I love him. But I really wish he’d stop assuming I’m going to wait around forever. Maybe having Dave around might light a fire under his ass, did you see how jealous he was at dinner?” She laughed.
“Well, anything I can do to help, just let me know.” I wasn’t exactly sure what help I could possibly offer other than hiring a fake boyfriend for her too. Chances were it wouldn’t work a second time around.
The sound of the front door opening tied a knot in my stomach. I knew who it was and what it meant. I hated the deceit, and the subsequent elabo
rate breakup I knew was in my future. It stung more than it did before. But I reminded myself my intentions were honorable even if shit was about to get real.
Gran Shelly walked into the room followed by a cloud of Chanel No. 5. Her silver hair was set into perfect finger waves while her cheeks were stained a little too pink to be natural. She didn’t care though, slathering on her face every day despite what people thought.
“Gran.” I rose from my seat, excited she was up and about and no longer knocking on death’s door. She’d come a long way since the last time I’d seen her, her pale blue eyes twinkling with mischief.
“Come here and give me a hug.” She shuffled in on her walking frame, her jeweled fingers reaching out as I got closer. “I’ve missed you, dear girl.”
Her thin arms squeezed me as I leaned down to meet her, a waft of her perfume tickling my nose as I squeezed back. She was so small but strong, her heart beating defiantly underneath her tailored blue dress. I couldn’t believe how close we’d come to losing her, the tears welling in my eyes at how lucky we’d been to be granted more time. If the lie or two I’d told made me uncomfortable, I’d gladly bear it, just so grateful to still have her around.
“Oh, stop with the fuss.” She gave me a shake, the laugh bubbling up her throat. “I didn’t get up out of my chair and come out at this time of night to see y’all crying.”
“I’m not crying; it’s allergies.” I wiped away the tears from the corners of my eyes as I stood straight.
A hand replaced the warmth of Gran’s hug, with Dave’s arm finding its way around me while his fingers pressed against my hip. I hadn’t even noticed him leaving his seat, almost startled to see him beside me.
“You okay?” he asked, without the tacky pet name on the end. It was clear the question was sincere and not for the benefit of the show.
I nodded, swallowing the emotion. “Gran, there’s someone I’d like you to meet. This is Dave.”
The introduction felt weird, everyone watching while I awkwardly waved at him like he was a toaster on the Price is Right. The moment not made easier as my gran narrowed her eyes in suspicion. “What are you doing here?”
My heart stopped as the she shuffled closer, her hand going to the chain around her neck and lifting the glasses attached to it to bring them to her eyes. Blinking she looked again, her smile widening as she proclaimed, “I know you.
A nervous laugh escaped my mouth as I grabbed Dave’s hand. “You don’t know him, Gran, you’ve never met. This is the man I told you about, remember? My boyfriend,” I added, wondering if Gran hadn’t decided to self-medicate with a couple glasses of Chardonnay before my dad picked her up.
“Boyfriend?” She looked even more confused. “No, no, I’ve seen this man on television. He travels house to house with an apparent allergy to wearing a shirt. I’ve seen the way those ladies smile as they hand him their money. If he disrobes, we’ll know for sure.”
Mortified.
A collected echo of gasps could be heard through the room as she shuffled closer, her shaking finger crooked, beckoning him to come closer.
“Don’t be shy, son. I’m eighty-six years old and I’m not afraid of seeing a little skin. I think I have a rolled up twenty in my purse.”
“Momma,” my mother warned. “It’s not polite to be asking the company to take off their clothes, especially not in the living room.”
Really? It wasn’t polite? That was the best she could come up with?
My gran had offered to throw my boyfriend—sure, he wasn’t technically, but semantics—a twenty to get naked like she was at a strip show. And my mother was worried about it happening in the living room? As if it wouldn’t have been as horrible if we’d been in the dining room. Because location mattered.
Now would be a good time to reconnect with religion.
Oh help me, Lord Jesus.
Dave smiled, ignoring he’d been propositioned by a woman pushing ninety. “Ahh, a fan of my work, I see.”
“Gran.” I wasn’t sure if the situation was hysterical or horrifying, the blood draining from my head. “Dave is an actor. He acts. That was a pet food commercial for Doggie Chow. Dave plays the delivery guy, and the women were smiling because he’s bringing their pets their food.”
Well, not really. I am almost positive some dumbass in marketing had intended for the misconception, sex sells and all that shit. I guess the tagline hadn’t helped—Doggie Chow, bargain price but twice as nice. No wonder she assumed he was the town gigolo.
“Oooooh.” Amy snapped her fingers and laughed. “I know the one, I almost didn’t recognize him with a shirt on.”
Cue a lot of throat clearing and my brother Travis cursing under his breath.
Gran played with the strand of pearls that flirted across her collarbone. “See, I’m not the only one. I have seen that commercial at least a hundred times and not noticed any mention of dog food.”
That fucking commercial had a lot to answer for.
“I’ll pass on the feedback,” I offered. “So . . .” And here I thought Dave being related to Eric was going to be our biggest problem. “This is my boyfriend, Dave.” I tried again with the introduction, hoping this time around she didn’t ask him to take off his pants.
“Hi, Gran Shelly.” He stooped down, lowering himself to give her a gentle hug.
“Well.” She smiled, tapping his back like he was a well-behaved Golden Retriever. “That’s nice, I wasn’t aware Jessica was dating anyone.”
“I’m sorry, what did you say?” Another nervous laugh, beads of sweat forming at my brow.
I know I didn’t imagine the time I sat beside her in my grandfather’s old rocking chair as she struggled to keep her eyes open and told her about a man who didn’t exist.
“Gran, remember last time I was here and you said that your greatest regret was that you hadn’t met all your grandchildren’s significant others? So I told you about my boyfriend and hoped you would get to meet him through my words?”
“Honey, I had so much morphine in me you could have told me that little green men had come to earth in their spaceship and I wouldn’t remember.” She looked over at Dave with appreciation. “But him, him I promise you I will not forget.”
It was like I had been run over by an eighteen-wheeler with my brains strewn all over the interstate. All the worry, avoiding the calls from my family, the initial lie and the guilt I had experienced after the fact, had all been for . . . nothing?
“Come on, Momma.” My mother led Gran over to a chair where she could be more comfortable. “Let’s get you situated so you can visit for a bit. I know you get tired easily. Jessica can tell you all about it, just think how lovely it will be hearing it all again.”
“How exciting.” I desperately tried to hide the panic in my voice. “I can’t wait.”
My legs felt like pudding as I wandered back to the sofa. Dave’s hand was still glued to my side and helped keep me upright so I didn’t fold like a two-dollar lawn chair as I took a deep breath.
“Just breathe,” he whispered. “It’s just a day at work and you’re pitching an actor to a director. You’ve done this a million times.”
His words of encouragement eased me as I sat beside her, making me feel a strange sense of calm and reassurance as Dave took the seat beside me.
“Now tell me,” her bright pink lips spread into a grin, “tell me all about your man.” She nodded to Dave.
“Well . . .” Breathe. Breathe. I’ve done this a million times. “As you know, Dave is an actor and the talent agency I work for represents him. So we met at work, went out on a date and fell in love. It’s pretty standard.”
If that was my pitch, I wouldn’t have only passed on the project but I would have fired my ass. I shook my head, disappointed in myself.
You are a confident, successful woman, Jessica Dawson. Now, we might not like the corner we’re backed into, but we sure as hell ain’t going to sit cowering in it. Own it, sell it—or pack up your shit and go home.
“The first time I noticed him was a Tuesday,” I started, relaxing against the cushions. “I’d seen him before but I’d been so busy trying to make a good impression with Jeremy that I barely looked up from my desk when someone came in. But that day, I looked up.”
“Awwww. It’s like a real life romance novel,” Lisa—my overly romantic sister-in-law—cooed, settling in and giving me her full attention.
Dave put his arm around me, kissing my shoulder as he grinned. “No matter how many times I hear this, it’s always like I’m hearing it for the first time.”
I gave him a subtle glare, playfully jabbing him in the ribs as I coughed out “asshole,” under my breath.
“It was his eyes,” I continued, my audience enthralled as I wove my tales of finding love. “I’d lost a contract earlier in the day and hadn’t gotten around to telling Jeremy. I was stalling, trying to think of everywhere it could be before I walked into his office and admitted I’d misplaced it. But when I looked up there were the kindest, warmest chocolate brown eyes I’d ever seen. They stopped me in my tracks, and then he asked me why I looked so upset. For three hours I had been tearing up my desk and not one person asked me if I was okay. But he did.”
Dave’s handed tightened and I didn’t need to ask him why.
My little scenario of how we started dating probably wasn’t as fictional as he’d expected. It was in fact the first day I’d really paid attention to him, deciding that unlike so many assholes who walked through our door, he wasn’t one of them.
In order to not lose my nerve, I ignored him, putting whatever he had going through his mind out of mine, determined to finish what I’d started.
“And then he told me that whatever I was looking for would turn up, and if it didn’t then I wasn’t meant to find it in the first place. And of course, he was right, the contract was sitting right in front of me the whole time. I guess I took his words to heart, and he has made mine stop ever since.”
My older brother groaned. “I think I’m going to puke.”