by Daisy May
We went up to the bedroom, saying nothing along the way. I took a seat on the bed this time, placing the laptop over my waist. The radiation might kill off my little swimmers, but at least Cole wouldn’t be able to see the boner I was roughly one hundred percent likely to get.
“So, where do we start?” I asked. “Should we pick up where we left off last time?”
“Okay,” Cole said. “Let’s assume that we worked out the details of our first date over the phone, and then when you got back here, we went out together.”
“So it was a great date from the start? No wishy-washiness about whether or not we liked each other?”
“Nope,” Cole said. “We were already in love. That date just confirmed our feelings.” He gave me a smile, which I wanted to call wistful. I was definitely reading into that.
“Okay, we went on this date and realized we were soulmates.” That definitely lent credibility to the speed that we’d gotten married. “Did we, um… on the first date…”
“You’re asking if we…”
Neither of us could seem to spit it out. After a moment of awkward silence, I laughed, and he followed suit.
“Apparently we’re both a little prudish, so maybe we didn’t get physical right away,” I said. “Maybe that date just ended with a kiss.”
“That sounds about right,” Cole said. “If it was real, I definitely would’ve been too shy to press for anything more.”
“Really? You don’t strike me that way.”
He looked abashed. “I guess appearances can be deceiving.”
“So we wouldn’t be sending each other long love letters at this point,” I said. “Maybe texting, if anything.”
Cole nodded. “Let’s come up with some texts.” He grabbed his phone and closed his laptop. “Let’s say it was the day after our date, and I texted you from work.”
A second later, my phone vibrated. Hey, you. Can’t stop thinking about you. :)
Despite myself, I smiled. I had a wonderful time last night, I texted back. Looking forward to seeing you tonight.
Same here. I might have to stay late, but I’ll be home eventually. Did you help Kerry with her diorama? She was really worried about it over the weekend.
Yeah, I helped her. It’s so sweet of you to check.
We’d gone silent, texting as if we were having a real conversation, getting into the spirit of our task. Now Cole paused and looked up. “Would we really be talking about Kerry and her homework? That’s not too romantic.”
“No, but it is realistic.”
Cole nodded. “I think that’s enough for the day after our date. Let’s skip forward in time a little.”
“Oh, you just want to get to the good stuff.” I don’t know what possessed me to come out with that, but then, I did like the way it made Cole blush.
“No, I figured—”
“I’m only teasing you,” I said.
“Well, I can handle it,” Cole said, his cheeks still tinged with pink. “Did we go all the way our first time, or did it take some getting to know each other first?”
“You’re asking if we might’ve stopped at oral, or jumped straight to the butt-fucking?”
Cole couldn’t even meet my eyes anymore. He really was a prude. How had he even managed to successfully procreate with Samantha? I wondered how many men he’d actually been with in the past, and what he was like when the bedroom door shut.
“I think we would’ve taken it a little slowly,” I said. “Since apparently we’re shy and all.”
For half a second, I allowed myself to entertain a fantasy that the same thing was happening in real life… that the only reason Cole and I weren’t together was a mutual fear of rejection. But no, there was no way he was into me like that.
“Okay, let’s write some more passionate messages,” Cole said. “Text or email?”
“I think text for now,” I said. “I’ll start.”
Hey :) I can’t stop thinking about last night. It was so amazing. You were so amazing. And even though it was just a little taste, I can’t wait to try some more.
“Kind of dirty,” Cole said, raising an eyebrow as he looked up from his phone.
“This might be a little hard if you think that message was dirty,” I snorted. “Now, are you going to write me back? Show me what you got.”
The feeling is mutual. :)
“That’s all?” I demanded. “I’d be furious if I got that from you. I mean, from someone.”
“You’re joking. It says the exact same thing that yours did.”
“Exactly,” I said. “It’s like a slightly longer version of the word ditto.”
“We’re never going to get anywhere if you keep finding fault with all my messages,” Cole said. “I think you’re going to have to accept I’m just not as romantic as you.”
“Ditto,” I said sarcastically, but I picked up my phone again.
I’m glad you liked it, I wrote. Tell me, which part was your favorite?
I couldn’t choose, he replied. The whole night was amazing.
I sighed. Well, did you prefer the part where my cock was in your mouth? Or where your tongue was up my asshole?
“Gordon!” Cole yelled, scandalized.
“What? That’s how I talk. You’re going to have to get used to it, seeing as we’re married.” I gave him a grin to let him know I was only joking, and that this was completely awkward for me too. I knew we weren’t really married. Totally.
“But you realize we’re writing these things for people to read, right? People are going to think that we… that I…”
“I didn’t say anything that scandalous, did I? Or is rimming that kinky in the world of hedge fund analysts?”
Cole’s eyes darted around, looking anywhere but at me. “I’m not going to answer that question.”
Laughing, I sat back against the headboard. “You know, I can just take over if you don’t want to brainstorm with me. I don’t mind doing this on my own.”
“No, that’s fine,” Cole said. “I don’t even want to know what kind of words you’d put in my mouth if I wasn’t around.”
I wanted to put something other than words in his mouth… but whatever. “Have it your way,” I said. “Are you going to reply to my text?”
Glaring at me, he typed something on his phone. I liked it all, it said.
“What a cop-out answer.”
“I guess I’m a cop-out kind of guy.”
He couldn’t even daydream about things he wanted to do with me? I shifted on the bed, trying to get comfortable. I was half-hard again despite Cole’s evident disinterest, and it was only going to get worse the longer this conversation went on.
With him just over there, it was all too easy to imagine him taking a few steps closer, a few layers of clothing sliding away… If he wanted me like that, we could be doing it right now.
“So, when should our next exchange be?”
“Definitely after the first butt sex,” I said. “That would be a big step for us.”
“So you’re going to write out a full email about it?”
“Yep! You want me to get flowery? Because I’ll get flowery.”
“I’m not saying…”
Before he could finish his sentence, I was on my laptop. “So who did what for this first session, anyway? What’s your pleasure?”
Cole’s face was red again, and the blush went down to his neck this time. “I’m good with anything, really.”
“Do you even know? I mean, have you had…”
“I’m not some kind of gay virgin,” he said defensively. “I’ve had dates before. They just didn’t stick around too long.”
Somehow it surprised me, especially the hint of bitterness in his voice. “I didn’t think you dated much,” I said. “You never told me about any guys you went out with, anyway.”
“Well, I wouldn’t have told you.”
“Why not?” Right, I was his employee. “So why aren’t you actually seeing anyone?”
�
��A lot of single men have a problem dating a father,” he said. “Kerry comes first, and she always will. People say they’re okay with it, but when push comes to shove, they can’t handle that she’s my first priority. I pretty much gave up on dating a while ago. If the right man were to drop into my lap, I’d be ecstatic, but how likely is that to happen?”
I could’ve laughed if I hadn’t been ready to cry. Here I was, right there in his lap, and yet he didn’t seem to want me.
“I’m surprised,” I said. “You’re a sweet guy. Remember when I first came here?”
“What about it?”
“You had a whole welcome package to greet me.” I grinned, remembering the maple syrup—it must’ve cost him a fortune, and it was still sitting unopened in the cupboard. “The first thing you said to me was bawn-joor.”
He covered his face. “Stop laughing at me. I was trying to be polite.”
“Even though I’m from Toronto.”
“We’re in Miami! I never met a Canadian who wasn’t a tourist, and ninety percent of them are from Quebec. I worked at a beach bar in college, remember? So many snowbirds would come every winter.”
“And that’s why your French pronunciation was so great,” I said with a snort.
“You just told me you don’t speak French.”
I laughed some more. “I think I know how to say bonjour. Not to mention how I’d already been living here for a couple years at that point.” He looked totally embarrassed now, so I eased up on him. “Anyway, tell me more about your love life.”
“Well… I thought about trying to hook up, as the younger types call it. I couldn’t get into the idea. I just don’t understand the appeal of having sex for the sake of sex.”
He’d managed to say the word “sex” this time. We were making progress.
“I know what you mean,” I said.
Personally, I’d tried a couple of one night stands, and they were okay, but I wasn’t in any huge urge to repeat them. Most of my relationships had ended after a few months—usually because the other guy wanted someone more ambitious. I was just a nanny without any postsecondary education, and that wasn’t good enough for anyone.
In any case, I wasn’t about to open up to Cole about all of that. This wasn’t the time, and he probably wouldn’t have cared anyway. He showed plenty of interest in me and my history, but only to help with my green card application. I had to remember that.
“So, you’re versatile,” I said, clearing my throat. “I’m more of a bottom, but it’s not a big deal.” I paused, wondering if the next part might traumatize him completely. “I tend to be a tiny bit submissive, too.”
His eyes went wide, and he rocked back and forth in his seat. Yeah, definitely too much information. I shouldn’t have gone that far.
“Okay, we’ll work with that,” he said in an oddly tight voice. “Maybe another time, though? I’m getting a little tired.”
“Me too,” I said. “I guess I’ll get changed for bed.” I grabbed my pajamas and headed toward the bathroom.
“Do you mind getting changed out here, actually?” he asked. “I want to shower before bed.”
Twelve—Cole
I’d never understood the appeal of nighttime showers before that week. Why get yourself sick by sleeping with wet hair?
Now I showered in the morning to get clean, and then at night to get dirty. I spent so much time in there, I was sure Gordon was wondering what was going on. It was all his fault, though, so I didn’t feel bad about keeping him in the dark.
I’m more of a bottom, but it’s not a big deal. I tend to be a tiny bit submissive, too.
Those words were on my mind all the time. I could usually keep myself under control when I was with other people… usually. Once I found myself alone, they’d echo through my head over and over. I only wished I knew the details of his kinky side.
Water poured over me, and I tightened my grip around my rigid shaft. Was he into the rough stuff? Because I didn’t know if I could deal with that. Maybe I could spank him once or twice, just to make him happy. The thought made my groin tingle, and I closed my eyes to picture it better. I could just about see the luscious flesh rippling under my hand. All right, maybe I’d be willing to spank him more than twice.
What else, though? Did he want to be tied up or something? Maybe I could handle that, too. But if he wanted me to talk dirty to him, well, I’d have to draw the line there. No way could I manage that. I’d barely been able to read those emails he sent me, and they weren’t even for real.
My rhythm slowed, and I shook my head at myself. None of this was for real. I’d almost forgotten that for a second. I could think about Gordon’s preferences, but they were only what he would want with other men. Not me.
The water made my grip so smooth, so slick, and as I got back into the flow, my hands slipped easily over my length. I bit my lip, my balls tightening and slackening. I needed this release.
Yet when I found it, I only wanted more.
*
Over the course of the week, I avoided Gordon’s questions about when we were going to continue our email correspondence. I knew I couldn’t put it off forever, but I was damn well going to try.
If he had any idea how hard this was, he’d actually feel sorry for me. The way he’d started to joke around and tease me the last time we talked was nothing short of painful. Sometimes I could’ve actually sworn he was flirting with me. I knew he wasn’t, though—and when I found myself forgetting that, I reminded myself of the immediate “no” when I’d first proposed.
One night, he brought home a pile of silky fabric. “Guess what this is.”
“I don’t know, why don’t you tell me?”
Part of me hoped he was going to say they were black silk ties for me to bind him up with. Part of me feared it. My hands quivered as I reached out to finger the fabric. It was the wrong shape, but we could always cut it.
Of course, that wasn’t what Gordon actually had in mind. “Kerry needs a costume for her school play, and I’m going to make it for her.”
I put down the newspaper I was reading. “I couldn’t ask that of you. That’s far too much work for a nanny.”
Gordon frowned, looking away. “I’m her stepdad. Or, I’m supposed to be.”
“Of course,” I said. “You can do that if you want. I just mean you don’t have to. I don’t mind buying a costume for Kerry.”
“I don’t think you’ll be able to find a costume for the elf witch in Magic Glamor.”
“What is Magic Glamor, anyway?”
“It’s a story about an elf witch, of course.”
“Oh, aboot one?”
Gordon rolled his eyes, spreading the fabric across the table. “No, abowt, naturally.”
I laughed at the way he imitated my accent. “Say it your way again.”
“No.”
“If you don’t, I’ll say it for you. Aboot.”
“No Canadian in the world says it that way.”
“That’s literally what you said two minutes ago.”
“I said aboot,” he said, and instantly clapped his hand over his mouth.
Sitting back in my chair, I laughed at him. He was too cute, and he didn’t get any less cute over time. I could have listened to him and his strange little mispronunciations for the rest of my life. And the easy way we teased each other was actually fun. I already knew I would never get tired of it.
“You know, we’re going to have to work on those emails again soon,” he said after a minute. “Unless you want me to write them on my own. Like I told you, I’m totally willing.”
It probably was a better idea, but I couldn’t deal with hearing what he’d say on my behalf. Even if he let me check over the emails before we used them, I didn’t want to even know what kind of dirty thoughts were in his mind.
“Maybe tomorrow,” I said.
He shot me a look, at first irritated and then content. I had avoided doing it again, but at least I was committing to a time.
“All right, tomorrow.” I reached for a piece of fabric, holding it up to the light. “You know, I thought maybe you were bringing this home for inspiration. To spice up our emails, or something.”
Gordon huffed out a laugh. “That would be a little strange. I don’t think I need any inspiration like that.”
“Oh, neither do I,” I said quickly. My gaze lingered on the pieces of fabric. “I’d never do something so kinky, anyway, so I guess you can forget about that submissive stuff.”
Gordon turned to me, a strange look shining in his eyes. “Are you sure about that? You don’t think once we’d been married for a while, I’d tempt you into trying it out?”
My cock was suddenly hard, and from the way he leaned slightly toward me, I wondered if the question was really hypothetical. It was, I told myself—I had to stop even hoping that things could be otherwise.
I can’t do that, he’d said to my first offer. No hesitation. No time taken to consider. No interest in me at all.
“No,” I said much too quickly. “You’d never tempt me.”
Thirteen—Gordon
If I’d had a last shred of hope about ever getting together with Cole for real, it was gone after that conversation over Kerry’s costume.
You’d never tempt me. That was what he’d said, and he sure sounded like he meant it. The attraction was one-sided—unrequited—not going to happen. I had to put it out of my mind, and in order to do that, I threw myself into sewing.
Crafting had always been a bit of a hobby for me, enough that I knew my way around a sewing machine. I’d never made a dress before, but it was easy enough to look up tutorials. After a few false starts, I had something wearable. After that, I had to turn it into something that screamed “elf witch.”
When Kerry saw the costume finished a week later, she squealed and gave me a huge hug. “Thank you so much, Gordy!”
“Gordy?”
“It’s like Daddy and Gordon put together,” she said, and wrapped her little arms around my waist again.
My cheeks were hot. I hadn’t realized how much her approval would mean to me. “You’re very welcome, kiddo. Now go try it so we can be sure it fits right.”