by Daisy May
“I was thinking about kissing you,” I said. “That’s the first thing I would do if we were in the hotel room right now.”
“You wouldn’t even pause to check out the view or see what’s in the minibar?”
“Oh, you’re going to go fancy,” I teased. “There aren’t many hotels in my price range that come with a minibar.”
“Anyway,” Cole said, rolling his eyes. “Tell me more. What happens after you kiss me?”
“I’d kiss you more,” I said. “Deeper.”
“Where? Standing up, or sitting down?”
“Standing up to start off.” My mouth watered as I pictured it. “But I think you’d want to take control. You’d nudge me over to the bed, step by step, never breaking away from the kiss. You’d back me up until I sat down, and I’d pull you right down with me.”
He was doing that thing with his hands on his thighs again, and I wanted so badly to be there stroking them for him.
“For someone who’s supposed to be submissive, you sure like telling me what you want me to do.” His voice was slightly husky and his eyes were going half-lidded. “Seems a little strange.”
“Well, then, why don’t you go ahead and tell me what to do to you?”
“I see what your game is,” he said. “You’re trying to get me to talk dirty to you, just like you always wanted.”
“Yes, honey, I got my ass deported so you’d finally talk dirty to me. It’s been a lot of work, but now you have no way out.”
His face fell for a moment, but he brightened back up as he leaned forward. “I’m going to try. For your sake, I have to try.” He bit his lip, his hand moving unconsciously to his waistline. “So we’re on the hotel bed, and we’re both lying down. And we kiss some more, kissing until we’re both going crazy with need. But we don’t want to rush things. It’s been so long for both of us, we just want to savor it.”
“Speak for yourself. I wouldn’t mind getting off once to take the edge off. I’m sure it’s going to be a multi-climax night for both of us.”
“You’ve got a few less years on you than I do,” Cole said. “Maybe you can keep going, but I don’t completely trust myself. If I might only get one shot, I’m definitely not going to waste it.”
“You talk like you’re some kind of old man.”
He raised an eyebrow. “An old man who’s going to undress you slowly, piece by piece, kissing my way over every part bit of skin that comes uncovered.”
Swallowing, I moved my hand toward my zipper. Hearing him talk like that was way too much of a turn-on. Especially when I couldn’t be there in person.
“Do you mind if I start taking care of this?” I asked, gesturing at the bulge in my pants.
“I was just thinking the same thing.”
With a self-satisfied smile, Cole unzipped himself. My mouth watered more as his erection came into view. I missed it so much, and I hadn’t seen it in so long. It looked exactly how I remembered—long and thick and juicy. Except in my memory, it’d always been within arm’s reach, and now it was way too far away. It enticed me, tantalized me, but nothing I could do would put it within my grasp.
Not for another few weeks, anyway.
“God, so gorgeous,” Cole breathed as he watched me stroke myself.
“Talking about how you look?” I asked, licking my lips as I stared right back at him.
I had to admit this whole moment was pretty hot—even if it couldn’t compare at all to the real thing. At least the end was in sight. I’d get to see him for one weekend, at least. This unquenchable need would be satisfied for a little while.
We touched ourselves, watching each other, and then I spoke again. “So you’d have me undressed on the bed,” I said. “Fully nude, or…?
“Naked as a jaybird.” He scowled at me when I burst out laughing. “Hey, you’re the one who wanted me to dirty talk.”
“Sorry, sorry.” I cleared my throat. My hard-on hadn’t wavered in the least.
“You’d be naked, and I’d be fully dressed. Makes it easier for me to work you over.”
He was so shy, he couldn’t even spell out what he wanted me to do to him. “What does that mean exactly?” I asked.
“It means I’d have my way with you,” he said, his eyes darkening. “Make your body mine.”
“So you’re saying you’d fuck me with your clothes on?” I asked, daring him to be more explicit.
“No, not yet,” he said, rising to the bait. “It means I’d pleasure every part of your body, kissing and licking and touching every square inch of your skin. Making you mine, making you feel everything. And then only after that, I’d go back to that place where you wanted me the most, and I’d slowly, carefully take you into my mouth.”
Holy shit. He had me enthralled by his words alone. My hand paused on my cock, and as I came out of the spell he’d put me under, it began to move again with renewed vigor.
“You never talked like that when we were writing emails,” I said.
“Maybe I needed more inspiration,” he said with an embarrassed smile.
“Whatever it is, keep it up.”
I jerked myself again, but reluctantly slowed down. I didn’t want to come too fast, even if we weren’t actually together. This was still the first sexual moment we’d shared in weeks, and I didn’t want it to be over too soon.
I glanced at Cole half-naked on the screen, and shuddered. I might not have much of a choice in the matter.
“Let’s say I suck you until you can’t take it anymore,” Cole said, his voice dark and meaningful. “What would you want me to do after that?”
“What I’d want to do is to return the favor, but I really don’t think I’d be able to wait. More likely I’d grab a condom and get you inside me as fast as possible.”
“About that,” Cole said, sounding serious now. “We’re married, and obviously I’m not going to be with anyone else. Do you think we could…”
“Ditch the condoms?” I’d never even thought about going without protection. I’d always seen it as a necessity. But now that Cole had pointed out we could skip it, I needed to feel him bare inside me. I needed that desperately. “I had a test a while back, so if you’re good… I’m good.”
Cole’s eyes burned into mine, and I felt like no two other lovers in the history of the world had ever wanted to be together as much as we did right then. The promise of full-contact sex, no barrier between us, was thrilling. I could hardly wait for that intimacy.
I moved my hand quicker, reaching for the bottle of lube I kept in my nightstand. Then I leaned back in the chair, giving Cole a good view of my hand gliding over my shaft. I heard his low intake of breath, and he leaned forward in his chair as if trying to get a better look at my cock. I obligingly moved my hips forward, arching up to bring it as close to the built-in webcam as possible.
“That’s so fucking hot,” he murmured. “But I want to see your face, too.”
I backed up a little, enough to let him see both. His own face was pure lust, and the way he was touching himself made me think he wasn’t too far from the edge.
“So you’re going to fuck me raw for the first time,” I said, struggling to keep control of my arousal. “What position do you want me?”
Cole’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. “Shit,” he murmured. “I just want all of them at once. Is that too much to ask?”
If I’d ever doubted his desire for me, I could feel it now, even through the screen. It was that tangible, even from halfway across the continent.
“Pick one, and then we’ll come together.”
He bit his lip. “I want you on your back,” he said. “Your hips lifted high. I want to have my mouth on yours when I enter you, and I want to press my whole body against your skin when I feel you for the first time.”
“Oh, fuck.” I jerked myself faster, feeling my lubed-up hand glide along my shaft. My hand went faster and faster, and on the screen, Cole’s was only a blur.
“Wanna be in you,” he
said, his eloquence slipping away with his desperation. “Wanna fuck you till you come…”
And as I exploded, a strained smile came over me.
I’d finally gotten my husband to dirty talk.
Twenty-Six—Cole
The visit was good. Great. Amazing, actually.
Gordon and I managed to keep our hands off each other as he and his moms showed me around Toronto. It was actually a pretty cool city—I liked how polite the people were. They actually apologized if they got in your way! And it was pretty cool to see things I’d only ever heard about, like the CN Tower.
“Looks like a giant dick, doesn’t it?” Gordon whispered in my ear as we stood there with Kerry.
“I don’t know what kind of dicks you’ve been looking at,” I laughed.
“Not yours—at least, not recently enough.”
His blonde mom must have overheard, because she shook her head. It was in a friendly way, though. They definitely thought more highly of me now than they had the first time we’d met. I giggled to myself as we moved on to the next attraction.
“Hey, want to spell that for me?” Gordon asked, pointing at the posters for a Zayn concert that were plastering Yonge-Dundas Square.
“Zee-A-Y-N.”
He pinched my arm. “Try again, Yankee.”
His moms laughed. “He’s right,” Giulia said. “You’re on our turf—you should say it our way.”
“Not a chance,” I said. “Kerry knows what the right way is, don’t you?”
“Zee!” she said, folding her arms.
“Three against two,” Cynthia said. “You’re outvoted.”
“No-o-o!”
So the day of playing tourist was pleasant. The night in the hotel room, though? That was everything we’d planned for it to be… and more. Suffice it to say, there was definitely a difference when that last layer separating us was taken away. My only question was why we hadn’t thought of it sooner.
That, and when we could do it again.
Although we didn’t want to leave Kerry alone, we couldn’t resist keeping the hotel room for the next two nights as well. We still spent the whole day with her and Gordon’s moms—but at night, it was just the two of us.
By the end of the weekend, I never wanted to leave. And I told Gordon so as we sat together at the airport.
We’d come early for the flight home, not wanting to miss it. I did need to be at work bright and early the next day, as much as I really didn’t want to.
“You should stay forever,” Gordon said, then looked away. “I mean, I know you can’t, but I wish you could.”
“We’ll figure something out.” If only I felt nearly as confident as I was trying to sound. Realistically, I didn’t know how this could ever work. But we’d make it happen. We had to.
“I’m so happy your feelings haven’t changed,” Gordon murmured into my ear. We were almost at the front of the check-in line, and I turned to him with a frown. As soon as we got to the front, I’d have to leave him behind.
“What do you mean?”
“Before I left, I worried that this was mostly physical. That we didn’t talk about enough important stuff. I thought maybe if I wasn’t there in person, you’d realize that I wasn’t the greatest person for you, and that you could do better. I thought maybe we’d both realize this was only a shallow relationship of convenience and that we rushed into getting married.”
“What’s a shallow relationship of convenience?” Kerry piped up.
“You’ll find out when you’re older,” I said.
She shot me a glare, but returned to pulling her little monkey suitcase.
“It was never like that,” I said. “I always felt strongly for you. It was never about the physical stuff, okay? Not that it wasn’t important.”
“What’s physical stuff?” Kerry asked.
We were getting waved up to the check-in counter at this point, and I gave Gordon a huge hug. “I’m going to call you as soon as we pass through security, okay?”
He nodded, his eyes full of sadness. “All right.”
Kerry and I got checked in, and Gordon’s words still haunted me as we waited in line for the security check. They let us through without a problem, although we did have to take off our shoes. The whole time, I was fighting off Kerry’s questions—and worrying about Gordon’s comments.
Why would he ever think we hadn’t been serious enough? Was that why he’d been trying to talk about weird things lately?
He’d been bringing up the stuff you were supposed to avoid on a first date. Of course, we’d gone way beyond that ages ago… somewhere around the time we put on these wedding rings.
Although now that I thought about it, he had a point. We hadn’t known all the serious stuff about each other when we got married. But he couldn’t honestly think anything would change my mind about him now, could he? Other than being a serial killer, there was nothing in the world he could do to make me stop loving him.
As soon as we got into the duty-free area, I let Kerry go wild, running around and trying the different perfume samples, while I called Gordon on my cell phone.
“Hey,” I said. “I miss you already.”
“What a coincidence, because I miss you too.”
“Are you still here? I hope you’re not talking and driving.”
“No, I’m sitting in the parking garage. You said you’d call, so I waited.”
That made my heart swell. “Hold on for a moment, will you? I want to talk to Kerry about something.”
I hung up, not sure if I was going completely out of my mind for even thinking about this. If not, I probably was for bringing it up to my daughter. But this idea had taken hold of me, and I couldn’t seem to let it go.
At the edge of the perfume counter, I cornered Kerry and got her to sit at a food court table with me. “Listen, sweetheart, I want to ask you something. You had a good time this weekend, right?”
She nodded.
“What would you think about coming here again? Maybe even regularly?”
“I want to come here again.” She frowned at me. “Why?”
“Never mind.” I couldn’t explain this to her right now. Not until I had a better vision of it myself, and until I was certain it was something that could actually happen.
That smart little kid figured out what I was thinking anyway. “Daddy, you should be with Gordy. You two make each other happy.”
I wrapped her in a giant bear hug. “Thank you, sweetheart. We’re going to figure this out.” I started to walk, already mentally planning when I could fly back to Toronto as I took out my phone to call Gordon back.
But Kerry had other ideas. “You’re not going to leave now, are you?”
“I have to fly home with you.”
“No, you should stay here with Gordy. I can go back by myself.”
“You most certainly can’t!” I gripped her shoulder, horrified at the thought of letting her travel alone.
“I can, Daddy, I saw it on TV. There was a girl whose mommy told the flight ladies to look out for her and they did, and they took her to the pilot and she got a little pin with wings on it, and there was a cute boy on the plane and he smiled at her.”
We were right in front of the departure gate now, and I paused to process what Kerry meant with all her chatter.
As I stared at her, she nodded at me. “I can do it, Daddy. You can call Grandma and Grandpa to pick me up when I get back. I’m big enough, you know. And all my friends will think this is so cool!”
She was crazy… I wasn’t going to let my daughter take a flight alone… but I did want to get back to Gordon now that I’d made the decision to stay. There was no harm in asking a ticket agent if the flight attendants could help Kerry out.
As it turned out, the airline offered an “unaccompanied minors program” for kids aged eight to twelve, and it wasn’t too late to sign up. Kerry grinned ear-to-ear as the agent told her how much fun the flight was going to be. Then I gave her another huge hug an
d started racing back through the airport.
Gordon’s phone rang and rang. He finally picked up, sounding slightly stressed. A horn honked in the background.
“Honey, which parking garage are you in?” I asked, out of breath.
“I left the airport. It took you so long to call, I figured you’d gotten on the plane.”
“Maybe Kerry has by now, but I’m not getting on it. I’m moving to Toronto, Gordon. I need to be with you. Now get back here so I can tell you that in person!”
Another horn glared, and I heard Gordon mutter, “Holy shit.” Tires screeched, and then his voice came through clearly again. “Well, I may not make it in one piece, but I’ll get back to you in a minute.”
“Get off the phone and drive,” I said before he hung up.
My heart pounded as I stood in front of the airport, waiting for my first sight of the car that was going to take me away from here. When Gordon pulled in, I jumped inside and gave him the longest, most passionate kiss we’d ever shared. Tried to, anyway.
He pulled away far too quickly. “You can’t seriously want to move here,” he said, staring at me in disbelief.
“Why the hell not? I love you, and I want to be with you. That’s the only thing that matters.”
He put his foot on the gas, slowly easing us out of the driveway. “But Kerry,” he said. “And your job. And what about empanadas? And Cuban sandwiches?”
I shook my head. “I’ll figure it out. I’ll figure all of it out. Even if I have to learn to make my own empanadas.”
“And the beach?” he said.
I shrugged. “I’m told you guys have a lake.”
We kept going like that for the entire car ride back. He came up with one objection after another, and when his moms saw I’d come back, they had their share of questions for me, too. But I had an answer for everything—and if anything else did come up, I trusted I’d find a way to solve it.
Even after we’d all settled down and they started to accept that I was really doing this, Gordon shook his head one more time. “I just can’t believe you’re doing this for me.”
I pulled him close and kissed him hard. “Believe it.”
Twenty-Seven—Gordon