True Blue (Blue Series Book 3)

by Jules Barnard

  My mom isn’t pleased that I have no prospects…and leech off my sister. Put that way, it sounds bad. I just couldn’t remain in Colorado. Not after things happened with Anna.

  I envy my sister. She went through heavy stuff recently, but she’s put her life to rights. Meanwhile, my head’s so fucked up with guilt and anger, I can’t see straight. That’s why I returned. Not that I’m explaining any of this to my sister.

  “I missed you. Isn’t that enough?” I say, feigning sincerity.

  Her eyes narrow. “Fine. Don’t tell me. Just make sure you keep your drinking in check. Don’t think I haven’t noticed how many beers you’re going through and how often you’ve come home hammered—when you’re not being antisocial on your computer.”

  Christ, I gotta get my own place. So I’ve been going out, and burying myself in a writing project to keep my mind off things. I don’t need my baby sister mothering me.

  After Mira, I resolved never to get screwed over by a girl. I did the screwing. That’s the problem. I was blind, insensitive. I ended up hurting someone I cared about. Anna deserved so much better than me.

  Cali punches me on the arm.

  “Hey.” I rub my shoulder. Jesus, she’s feisty. “Was that necessary?”

  “Get your head out of your ass. Jaeger and I talked. We think Mira should move in for a little while. It’s not safe for her alone in her apartment after what happened.”

  Correction. Make that new living space an emergency.

  No way am I sticking around if Mira moves in. That’s the last thing I need. But Cali’s right, Mira shouldn’t live on her own. It’s not safe. Lewis’s place is out. Gen moved in with him recently, and from what I understand, his place is small. That could get awkward. Cali says Lewis’s relationship with Gen put a strain on his friendship with Mira.

  Not that I care. Why am I even thinking about this shit? I’ve been around my sister too long. I’m getting dragged into chick drama.

  “Yeah, sure. It’s your place. Do what you want. I’ll stay with a buddy. Mira can have the loft.”

  Gen and Cali rented a one-bedroom with a low loft above the kitchen. They shared the bedroom, until Gen moved in with Lewis a couple of weeks ago.

  Cali sighs, exasperated. “That’s what I’m talking about. If you were listening, you would know this. I’ll stay with Jaeger so Mira can have my bedroom. You don’t need to move out.”

  Whoa, what? “You want me to live here? With Mira?”

  Hell no.

  “Yes, jackass. Someone needs to look out for her. Gen and Lewis are finally getting some much-needed space from Mira. If we don’t set something up so Lewis is convinced Mira is safe, he’ll move her in with him and Gen.”

  “And I should care about this why?”

  Cali throws up her hands, her face turning a bright shade of pink to match her strawberry blonde hair. Cali missed out on our mom’s bright red crop, but only just. “Because you’ve been living here rent free for weeks, hogging the remote and behaving like an overall ass.”

  “You can stop busting my balls any time now, Calzone. This isn’t my problem. It’s yours. You fix it.”

  “Oh, my fucking…” Cali lets out a frustrated screech.

  She hates it when I call her Calzone, but I have a feeling she’s more angry I’ve put a wrench in her plans to save Mira.

  Jaeger enters the living room. “Dude, help your sister out.”

  I glare at Jaeg. “What happened to bros coming first?”

  He shakes his head as if I’ve missed something crucial. “Not with Cali, man. She comes first.”

  Fuck. I can’t argue that logic. Cali is a pain in the ass, but she is my sister.

  Still, this is Mira we’re talking about. No way can I do what Cali asks. I spent a couple of hours in Mira’s presence tonight and already I’m feeling things I don’t want to.

  “Why doesn’t she move in with Lewis’s parents?” I suggest.

  Cali shrugs. “Mira won’t move home. I’m not sure why.”

  And here we go again. Mira causing trouble. I escaped this shit. I won’t step back into the fire.

  “Sorry, Cali. No can do.”

  “Why not? What did Mira ever do to you?”

  “She’s done enough.”

  Chapter Seven

  Mira

  Lewis opens the passenger door of the Jeep for me. Gen tries to take the backseat and I wave her off, gingerly easing in back. The doctor said I don’t have a concussion. Bruises, including a couple of bruised ribs, and a cut on my head the nurse cleaned and sewed with three stitches, but nothing that won’t soon heal.

  The police took a statement. I gave them the best description I could of the men who attacked me, and left out the part about owing a loan shark. It might not help my case, but I’m already in trouble and I don’t need more. If I can’t shovel myself out of this mess, I’ll tell them. For now, I don’t want to draw more attention.

  As long as I stay out of dark, deserted places, I can earn back the money and be done with this. I’ll have to stop giving my mom cash, no matter what she says. And no more visiting her in shanty homes. Too dangerous. I’ve gotta be smart from here on out.

  “Mira,” Gen says with a bright smile I’m certain is genuine. Which is strange. All the pretty girls in high school were eager to elevate themselves by putting me down. “I just got a text from Cali. She offered you her place until the police find the guys who did this.”

  For a moment, I don’t know how to respond. I’m not used to receiving help from anyone other than Lewis and his family. “Thanks—but she doesn’t have to do that. I’ll be fine at my place.”

  “No, Mira.” Lewis shakes his head, glancing at me in the rearview mirror. “You either stay at Cali’s, or with me, but you are not returning to your place. You could always crash with my parents—”

  “No way,” I cut him off. “That might put them in danger.”

  Lewis sighs. “Mira, they’re your parents too. They love you and want to protect you.”

  John and Rebecca aren’t my parents. They’re kind, loving people I owe a debt of gratitude to for rescuing me when I was a kid. The last thing I will do to repay their kindness is draw thugs to their house. I’m not thrilled with the idea of drawing thugs to Cali’s house either.

  Lewis stares at me in the mirror again. “It isn’t safe for you to live on your own. Not after what happened.” Gen nudges him in the side and his lips clamp together.

  “Mira.” Gen twists around from the front seat. “Lewis won’t be able to sleep if he doesn’t know you’re okay. You know how he is. He’ll show up at your place every hour to check in. He’ll call until your phone explodes.”

  Lewis is protective. He’s always been that way. I love that about him, but I know what Gen is getting at. Lewis deserves a life, which he can’t have if he’s worried about me and putting everything aside to make sure I’m okay. It will be safer at Cali’s than alone. At least for tonight. Those men abandoned me in the woods. I’m pretty sure they don’t know where I am right now, but I won’t risk them discovering it. I’ll figure something else out tomorrow, but for tonight, no one knows I’m at Cali’s, including my mom. And I just got done telling myself to be careful.

  “So what exactly did Cali say?” I ask hesitantly. “She really doesn’t mind me staying there?”

  Gen snorts. “No. She’s happy to have an excuse to live with Jaeger in his swank house on the lake. Believe me, it’s no hardship for her.”

  “Okay, I appreciate it. I’ll stay at Cali’s for the night.”

  Gen smiles at Lewis and he grins at her, the moonlight providing just enough illumination to catch the warmth in his adoring gaze.

  I look away.

  I felt terrified, then numb, after the men beat me. Not even the pain of my injuries rattled my nerves. But this—this loving display of my best friend with the woman he wants enough that he’s willing to build walls between us—it’s too much. I know it’s not quite like that. My th
erapist says my relationship with Lewis hasn’t been healthy and that we need boundaries, but it feels like I’m alone.

  I hate alone.

  I have bad memories of alone.

  Lewis pulls into the driveway of Cali’s cabin. Jaeger walks out just as we exit the Jeep. It’s late and dark, but the porch provides enough light to show Jaeger lifting luggage into the back of his truck. Cali walks out and smiles when she sees us.

  I trusted what Gen said about it being okay for me to stay here, but it’s good to see Cali’s happy expression.

  “We’re all set,” Cali says cheerily. “I’ve moved my clothes out of the bedroom, Mira, and I left the essentials in the bathroom.”

  That sounds like a lot of effort for one night. I hate that she went to the trouble.

  Tyler steps outside, a duffel bag slung over his shoulder. My face heats and the punch of emotion I get around him starts coursing through me.

  Tyler’s eyes narrow on the suitcase in the back of Jaeger’s truck. “I thought we talked about this,” he says to Cali in a low tone. “I’m not staying here. You’ll have to keep an eye on her.”

  Tyler’s living with Cali and Gen?

  Well, that’s not gonna work.

  “No one needs to stay with me,” I interrupt.

  No way will I become a bigger charity case than I already am. I don’t need to be watched over. I just need a place to crash until I figure out a new plan. It made sense to stay at Cali’s for the night, but not with Tyler.

  Tyler frowns. “You can’t stay by yourself, Mira.”

  I understand he found me in the woods and felt some obligation to help, but why the concern now? He made it clear he doesn’t like me or want to be around me.

  “Of course I can. No one will know I’m here. I’ll be fine. It’s just for one night.”

  “Mira,” Cali says, “you can stay at my cabin indefinitely. Tyler will look out for you.” She shoots a glare at her brother.

  Tyler shifts his shoulder and plucks the front of his T-shirt.

  God—that tic. He used to do it when he was nervous, or agitated, I’m not exactly sure which.

  I used to try and provoke Tyler into making his tic when we studied together. I’d accidentally brush my long hair over his shoulder while leaning down to look at an equation, or graze his outer thigh with my arm when I bent to grab a pencil from my backpack.

  The corner of my mouth twitches. There was always something about ruffling Tyler’s easygoing exterior that made my heart race. Maybe that’s why I pressed my mouth to his neck after he lifted me in the woods. Despite everything, that spark is still there, and I’m still addicted to it. Only Tyler’s edgier these days. It doesn’t take much to annoy him, and not in the fun, good ways. Living together, even for a short while, would be an utter disaster.

  Tyler doesn’t project the sweet, boy-next-door attitude he did in high school. I’m not sure what caused the change, but I always knew he had depths he never showed. The tic used to hint at the real Tyler. He was so in control around everyone else, he rarely showed the heated, provoke-able part of himself. But I glimpsed it when we studied, and especially the night we slept together.

  I pinch my eyelids closed and take a deep breath. I can’t think about that night when I’m around him. It reminds me of all the things I’ve lost.

  Tyler drops his duffel on the porch’s cement pad and glares at his sister. “Cali, you can’t offer Mira your place to keep her safe, then take off. Someone needs to look after her. You and Jaeg have to stick around.”

  Cali’s jaw sets. “Jaeger works in his woodshop, located at his house, Tyler. He’ll be gone most of the time, and for that matter, so will I. I work during the day and take classes in the evening. That leaves one person who has nothing else to do at the moment.”

  Tyler lets out a growl.

  I’m so caught up in the sibling angst I’ve forgotten this is about me. And damn, it’s humiliating. I don’t need a babysitter.

  “Hold on a minute,” I break in, but Cali and Tyler are having none of it. Their eyes don’t even flicker toward me. They continue to glare at each other.

  Tyler picks up his duffel and stalks back inside the cabin.

  Cali claps her hands. “Now that’s all settled.”

  “What’s settled?” I have this sinking feeling in my stomach, and it has nothing to do with residual nausea from those bastards’ boots striking my abdomen.

  Cali turns to me. “Tyler will stay with you, Mira. To protect you.”

  Oh, shit.

  This just might be the worst possible scenario, and I can’t come up with an alternative. My mind is in freak-out mode.

  Everyone busies around me, collecting items and stowing them in their respective cars, while I stand in shock, at first on the porch, then in the center of the living room after Cali ushers me inside.

  Lewis hugs my stiff shoulders. “I’ll check back in the morning. We’ll get your truck and pack some things from your apartment.” I cling a little too long, and he squeezes me again. “You’ll be safe here, Mira.”

  What he doesn’t realize is that I’m not afraid of those jerks returning. It’s unlikely they’d find me at Cali’s tonight. I don’t want to be left alone with Tyler.

  Misreading my hesitation, Lewis and Gen take off, assuming I’m safe now. Cali and Jaeger leave shortly thereafter. I’m still in the middle of the living room several minutes later, sifting through my muddled brain as to how it came down to this. Me and Tyler, alone. Living together. I wouldn’t want those guys finding me here with Cali, drawing danger to her. But if Tyler is here with me, it isn’t safe for my emotional stability.

  Tyler kicks his duffel behind the recliner and strides into the kitchen. He shoves items around in the refrigerator, glass scraping on metal racks, bottles clanging together, ignoring me. I remain helpless as he pulls out a Sierra Nevada and pops the top with a bottle opener.

  The brisk, yet controlled anger and the beer in his hand are a haunting reminder of a past life. Only then it was my mom or some guy she was dating, drinking and belligerent.

  This is all wrong. I cradle my ill stomach, and sink onto the couch. “You can’t stay here, Tyler.”

  “Tell me about it,” he mumbles.

  I look up as he walks into the living room. “No, really. Go to a friend’s place. No one needs to know you aren’t around.”

  His eyes narrow on my face. He takes another swig, gaze unwavering as he studies me. “First of all, they’d know. And second, you can’t stay here alone. Cali’s right. I’m the best person to look out for you.”

  “You’re the worst person.”

  Tyler stomps over and slams his bottle on the end table beside the couch. I flinch, despite the solid nerves I pride myself on. It must be this night. The beating, seeing Tyler again—I’m off my game.

  He looms over me. “Let’s get one thing straight. You shit on me, not that I minded the way you used me.” He sneers, and I hold his gaze.

  Anger I can relate to—a little piece of home. “If that’s how you feel, then why are you helping?”

  He leans closer, as if to spew more venom my way, only something happens. We’re too close. The scent of him hits me, a hint of beer, but also bike oil and laundry detergent, and him, the scent that’s all Tyler and smells so good.

  I don’t know if my expression changes, or if he senses it too—the spark that’s always between us—but his eyes go dark. He slowly eases back and swipes his beer from the table, his gaze cutting away. “Stay out of my business, Mira, and I’ll stay out of yours.”

  Tyler strides to the back door and slams it shut behind him. I sit there without moving, because I can’t. Not after that.

  Chapter Eight

  Tyler

  I slept for crap last night. I felt bad after I took out my frustrations on Mira. I shouldn’t have gotten in her face like that. But fuck. Me and Mira living together? That’s some messed-up shit.

  There’s no question Mira is in danger.
What I want to know is why. She owes money, so sayeth Lewis. I don’t get it. Mira has Lewis’s rich parents to help her out. It doesn’t make sense that she’d turn to a loan shark instead of his family.

  I rub my eyes and blink at the ceiling. There’s gotta be a way to fix this. If I can fix it, I can get Mira out of Cali’s place and return my life to normal. My new normal isn’t exactly a peaceful existence—there’s none of that after Colorado—but it’s an escape. Cali’s home has become my safe house, and Mira’s presence has destroyed that.

  Cali is right about my drinking, and I’ve been trying to ease up on it lately, but that went out the window last night. I didn’t drink as much as I have been, but I still downed four beers on the back patio before my mind calmed enough for me to drag my ass upstairs and crash.

  Everything about Mira has me at peak anxiety, like I could punch a hole in the wall or kick down a door. The kind of pent-up agitation that needs an outlet.

  Living with her is going to put me in an early grave.

  “Christ,” I growl.

  “You say something, Tyler?” Mira’s lilting voice drifts up from below my loft.

  Like I said, no peace.

  “Nothing,” I grumble, and sit up, pinching the bridge of my nose.

  I put up with my sister and Gen’s crap reality shows, the hogging of the bathroom, but living with Mira is—goddamn, how did I get here?

  There was a time when my life was good; not great, but decent. Now…Now I don’t think good is on the horizon.

  The scent of spice fills the air, like cinnamon and licorice. I swing my legs to the floor of the loft, my knees near my shoulders since the mattress is on the ground. I reach for a pair of jeans and my gaze lands on the rumpled T-shirt I wore yesterday. Normally, I don’t wear a shirt in the morning.

  Fuck it. I’m not changing my ways. If I didn’t change for my fiancée, I’m not changing for Mira.

  Cali’s right—I am an asshole. But I already knew that. It became apparent after everything went down in Colorado. I can never fix things with Anna. She’s lost to me forever. But I can get my shit together and be a better person than I have been.