He swallowed, looked up at the ceiling, then back down at the paper in front of him.
It hadn't changed.
The parchment was still blank.
He turned to the next page.
Nothing.
And the next.
More pages.
More nothing.
There was no writing on any of them.
CHAPTER 38
A dry heave pushed up from Cameron's stomach and he doubled over, then lurched forward and caught himself on the table.
"No." His knees buckled and he slumped to the floor and bit his lip. "This can't be happening."
"I'm sorry." Ann put her hand on his back.
"Where are the words? Where are they!"
"I don't know."
"I believed, I did. I believed the book was real."
"Shh, I hear something."
"I needed that book to be real. There has to be something we did wrong. There has to be some way to unlock it, some prayer we need to say, some code, maybe it's like invisible ink . . ."
But he knew none of those things would make words appear on the faded pages.
"Let's close it and get out of here."
She was right. It was over, time to go. He was too numb to argue.
They closed the book and packed up their gear.
As Cameron slung his pack over his shoulder he said, "It makes no sense. Why would—?"
Ann snapped her hand up to cover his mouth. "Our blender has grown feet," she mouthed. "Listen."
The faint scuffle of shoes or boots echoed off the concrete walls of the outer room.
"Cameron!"
The voice rang out like a gong and he knew instantly who it belonged to: Jason Judah.
A moment later Jason stood in the opening, bowing, grinning, and bouncing lightly on the toes of his dark green military boots. "Wowee!" Jason took a slow look around the room and then settled back on Cameron, a mocking smile on his face. "I must express my great gratitude for leading me here. It is highly appreciated."
Jason stepped through the opening and continued grinning as he stared at the book. "The Book of Days, in all her glory, resting peacefully in Taylor Stone's basement. Why doesn't that surprise me even minutely?"
Jason kept his flashlight shining on the book as he strolled around it. "As you know, Cameron, I had little belief there was an actual physical book till you came along. But your dad saw it when he was a child. And children often tell more truth than most adults. Taylor Stone for example." Jason leaned back and laughed. "I love to be proven wrong and to be proven right."
"How did you know we were here?"
"I've been following you, of course." Jason studied his fingers before looking up at Cameron and Ann. "Now please, how did you figure it out? I'm curious is all."
Cameron glanced at Ann. She was pale but stood as solid as the concrete at their feet. It looked like she was holding her breath.
"You are not going to tell me. I understand. Keeping all your secrets secret, right?" Jason motioned toward the book. "Do you mind if I . . . ?"
Cameron stepped away from the book. "Not at all, I'll be interested to see what you think."
Jason looked at the cover of the book. "Did you translate it?"
Neither of them answered.
"It's Hebrew. 'The Stories of All Times.'" He ran his fingers across the cover like he was touching silk. "God's book. Thousands and thousands of years old at the least. And thousands of years still to come. Will you help me open it, Cameron?"
"Sure."
As they lifted the cover he kept his gaze locked on Jason's face to see the moment when he realized the truth.
After they set the cover down Jason started turning pages. One. Ten. Twenty. "Is this a joke?" Jason pulled back from the book and blinked. "What is this?" His eyes switched back and forth from Cameron to Ann. "Where is the writing?"
"There isn't any," Cameron said.
"Explain to me where the words are. What do you do to make them appear?"
"There are no words."
Jason stared at them for twenty seconds before pulling a knife out of his belt and flashing his light over the blade. "This is an Mtech tactical bowie knife. It's extremely sharp." He lasered his eyes on Cameron. "Tell me how it works."
"What do you want me to say? It's a fraud. There are no words on any of the pages."
With one stride Jason grabbed Ann, yanked her back, and pressed the blade into her throat. "I've always liked you, Cameron, but I will gut her right now unless you tell me how to read the book."
"I told you! There's—"
A voice pierced the darkness behind them. "From the beginning, Jason, you've understood correctly what the Book of Days is. An idea. Only an idea."
Taylor Stone stood in the doorway.
"Put the knife down. They can't tell you anything."
Jason laughed.
"Now, Jason."
He released Ann and shoved her to the side. "So you're finally going to be the answer man, Stone?"
"Try me."
Taylor walked to the book, his eyes focused on Jason. "Get farther away from her."
Jason eased a half step to the right and pointed the knife at Taylor. "There, now talk."
Taylor looked at Ann. "Are you okay?"
She nodded, her face pale.
The instant Jason let Ann go, Cameron wrapped Ann in his arms. "Are you sure you're all right?"
"That's more adrenaline than I've ever gotten during a climb."
"Cameron," Taylor said, "I tried to keep you from finding this because I knew it would dash your dreams. I'm sorry."
"Stone, I want answers," Jason said. "What game are you playing?"
"No more games."
"Then talk." Jason motioned toward the book. "What is this thing?"
"There is an old Native American legend in Central Oregon that tells of a book of stories of every man's life. So I've always guessed that settlers from the early- to mid-1800s learned of the myth, tied it to Psalm 139:16, and created this book to symbolize their beliefs. You were closer to the truth than you knew."
"Why the charade all these years? Why not tell me instead of hiding it, denying you knew anything about the Book of Days?"
"Because until Cameron came along you were content in your belief that the book was an idea, and as you can now see, you were right. But if you discovered this symbol that was created to represent a spiritual crock-pot idea, you would try to get the book declared a historic artifact and fight me to get it moved out of here into your possession. Then you and your followers could worship it and draw more followers into your cancerous religion."
"Which I will do."
"Fine. Try it."
"When did you find it?" Jason asked Taylor.
"I think you should be more worried about Ann pressing charges than when I found an old pretend book."
"I'm not going to press charges; I just want him to leave."
"Answer me," Jason said.
"Ann?" Taylor asked.
"I'm fine."
Taylor glanced around the room, then ran his palm over the surface of the book. "I haven't been in this room for more than twenty years. It is a marvelous piece of history." He cracked his knuckles. "I found it in my midthirties and brought it here shortly after."
"Where did you find it?" Cameron asked.
"That is a story for another time."
"Is this what my dad saw when he was a kid?"
"I would imagine. It's the most plausible explanation for what he told you."
"You are a platinum piece of work, Stone." Jason ran the bowie knife up and down the side of his pants.
"Thank you." Taylor stared at Jason.
Jason started to say something to Taylor, then stopped and turned to Cameron. "I still say the man is a liar and can't be trusted." He pointed at Taylor. "We're not finished."
"You're right." Taylor took a deep breath. "I need to say something to you."
Jason glared at him.
"Forgive me."
"What?" Jason shook his head.
"Forgive me." Taylor opened his palms. "For many things. For my ego, for letting myself look good and allowing you to look bad after we fell apart. For not acknowledging the pain you felt when Annie chose me over you. For not letting myself care what happened to you when you went off to war. For keeping you in your place through my silence. For carrying a bitterness toward you all these years. It's poison. Lead weights." He looked up, then back to Jason. "Forgive me."
Jason stared at Taylor for over half a minute, his eyes betraying the struggle raging in his heart. Finally he spoke. "You've got to be kidding. What do you want me to say? Let's kiss and make up? You stole Annie from me, you destroyed my life, and now you've stolen my hope of finding a real Book of Days."
"I'm sorry; I've been wrong." Taylor stretched out his hand. "Bitterness destroys the vessel it's kept in. Let's bury it, release it. Let it all go, old friend. Please. For both of us."
"I . . ." Jason's gaze darted from the book to the floor to Taylor. "You're asking me to . . ." For a moment his eyes softened and his body shuddered. He shut his eyes, then they snapped back open. "Never. I'll never forgive you. This isn't over."
"Yes, it is."
Jason pointed his knife at Taylor. "What is between you and me won't be finished till one of us is dead."
The big man turned and strode out of the room.
As soon as the echo of Jason's footsteps faded, Cameron yanked on his pack, glanced at Ann, then glared at Taylor. "Now that that's over, it's answer time. Why the elaborate game? The clues, the rocks, the whole setup?"
"Like I said, I tried to keep you away from the heartbreak of all this."
"You did a lousy job." Cameron kicked at a clump of dust on the floor. "Why didn't you just tell me from the beginning that the book existed but only as a symbol? Why let me waste all that time and stir up all my hopes?"
"Because you wanted to believe your dad and Jessie so desperately. Unless you followed the clues and went down the path of discovery for yourself, you wouldn't have accepted the truth. And also, your search these past few weeks—whether consciously or unconsciously—has been about far more things than the Book of Days."
"Oh, it has? Are you going to enlighten me as to what those things are?"
"You're searching for eternity. For meaning. For hope. You're entertaining the possibility that you can let Jessie go and move on with your life." Taylor glanced at Ann. "None of these quests would have started if you hadn't come to Three Peaks and completed your search for the book."
"But I have no answers to any of those questions."
"I don't think your journey is over yet." Taylor touched the blank pages of the book.
Nice try. How would he know? "When the path ends at a stone wall, the journey is over."
"I'm sorry. I know how much you wanted it to be real. And I believe there is a real book with pages we will open, full of words where everyone's story is written down and recorded by God's own hand for all of eternity, but it's not on this earth and it's not for the eyes of mortal man to see. Someday I believe I will see it, but not in this age, not in this life. And I believe your memories of Jessie and your dad are hidden and safe in that book."
Cameron glanced at Ann. "Let's get out of here."
He walked past Taylor without looking at him.
Cameron and Ann sat in his car, neither of them speaking. What was there to say? It was time to go back to Seattle, but he didn't want to. Go back to what? If his condition continued to worsen, he wouldn't have much of a mind to work with back home anyway. He wanted to stay in Three Peaks. But do what? Search out the Native American legend that would only lead him back to Taylor Stone's basement?
What should I do, Dad . . . Jessie? What should I do, God?
"I'm sorry." Ann touched his hand. "Truly sorry."
He rubbed his upper lip and stared at The Sail & Compass logo on the outside of the restaurant, at the needle on the compass pointing to the North Star. If only he could find a north star for his life.
Jessie would say the only North Star was Jesus. As would his dad. And Ann.
"What are you going to do now?" Cameron asked.
"I'll spend a few more days down here, then head back. I want to hang out with Tricia and Taylor for a bit. I'm still trying to wrap my brain around the fact that he's my uncle." Ann turned toward him in her seat. "And you?"
"I don't know. I should probably head back in the morning and try to get on with my life. Start working on that bid with Brandon."
"May I make a suggestion?"
"Sure."
"Tell Brandon everything that's happened. If he's any kind of friend, he'll understand why you need two more days. Then do something for yourself tomorrow. And keep your fly-fishing lesson with Taylor the day after tomorrow. You're blind if you can't see he cares about you."
Cameron fired up his MINI Cooper and pulled into the street.
She was right. His life was ending anyway. It wouldn't end any faster or slower if he returned to Seattle two days from now.
A moment later he knew exactly what he needed to do the next day.
CHAPTER 39
Two Years, Two Weeks Earlier
Cameron made himself a raspberry-and-banana smoothie and plopped down in front of the television Sunday afternoon.
Jessie clumped down from upstairs. "I'm headed out to spend a little time in the sky, but I want to show you something first. Do you have a minute?"
"Sure, always," Cameron said, but kept watching General Maximus Decimus Meridius lead the Roman legion against the German barbarians. "We haven't watched Gladiator together in a long time."
"I'm not big on the violent parts."
"Neither am I, but it's such an epic flick."
"I need to show you this."
"Uh-huh."
"This is important, Cam-Ram."
He paused the DVD and turned toward her, the light from the big screen casting a warm glow on her face.
"Sorry."
"I need you to take a good look at this." She reached into her coat pocket and held out what looked like a highly polished stone about the size of a large grape. It was slightly oval and russet colored with a small hole bored through the top, a thin leather cord threaded through it. As she handed it to him, Jessie settled down next to him in their blue two-person chair.
"It's beautiful."
Jessie nodded.
Cameron turned it over in his hand and ran his forefinger over the surface of the smooth stone. There were scratches on it, but they weren't random. It looked like some kind of pattern or writing. "Where'd you get this?"
"I found it when I was a kid. It's Native American."
Something was off. There'd never had secrets between them. "How long have we known each other?"
"A long time."
"And you're just now getting around to showing me this? I thought I knew everything about you." He winked and patted her leg.
"It wasn't the right time till now."
"And what makes now the right timing?"
"It just is."
"Okay." Cameron put his arm around Jessie and pulled her close. "And these markings?"
"I think it's some kind of language."
"What's it say?"
Jessie shrugged. "I have no idea."
"It's cool, I like it." He started the movie playing again and tried to hand the stone back to her.
"No." Jessie pushed his hand away. "I want you to have it. You need to have it."
He paused the film again. "This stone means something to you." He brushed a strand of hair away from her face and studied her eyes. They were puffy. "What's going on? Why have you been crying?"
She shook her head. "I needed to give it to you just in case."
"Tell me what the stone means."
"I'll tell you when I get home, I promise."
Pressing her wouldn't make her tell him, but he had to ask. "Just in case what, Jess?"
/> She placed her finger on Cameron's hairline and slowly ran it down his forehead . . . nose . . . chin . . . neck . . . chest till she stopped on his heart. "I will always be here, you know. No matter what happens in the next few weeks."
He pulled her in close and kissed the top of her head. This wasn't like her. Quiet, hidden, melancholy. And holding on to a secret that had her living in a world she rarely visited. She wouldn't tell him what the stone meant? Okay, he'd give her time. But he didn't want her to be alone today. He didn't want to be without her today.
"Are you sure you don't want to stay here today? Hang out, you and me?"
Her gaze dropped to her lap. "I can't stop living and I need to get some hours in the air."
"Tell me, Jess."
She stood and buttoned her Gore-Tex jacket. "Good-bye, Cameron." She flipped her tan scarf over her shoulder, the one he'd given her so she'd look like Amelia Earhart, and shuffled toward the door.
He squinted at the back of her head. "You sure you don't want to stay?"
"I'll be fine. I'm sure I got all worked up for nothing." She opened the door halfway and stopped, her hand resting on the knob. A few seconds later she turned and looked at him, a sad smile creasing her face. "I love you, Cam. Always and forever. Remember."
"What is it?"
She dropped her head and shook it. "Fine, I'm fine." She opened the door the rest of the way. "So are you. Always."
The front door clicked shut and the blast of cool air that had swirled around him for the last few minutes died.
Book of Days: A Novel Page 26