by Pelaam
“I shall do my very best, Madam. I have friends both on and off the force who will assist me.” Jasper bowed to Lady Valentina, then turned to Amaretta. “However, I hope to have some spare time. Perhaps to go to the theatre?”
“That would be quite delightful, sir. I’m very partial to attending theatre.” Amaretta smiled widely. “Mother, perhaps you and I could share a room, so that Nathan may stay here with us.”
“Well, I had an invitation to go to the country and spend a few weeks with an invalid cousin. She has no close family to attend her. So you can have my room while I’m away. Of course Nathan must stay here with us.” Lady Valentina patted Nathan’s shoulder. “Now, if you’ll help me, Amaretta, we’ll fetch the tea. Do sit down, Constable Jasper, Nicolas. We shan’t be a minute.”
“Thank you.” Jasper bowed as the ladies left, Amaretta batting her eyelashes outrageously at him as she followed her mother out.
Unable to bottle up his laugh, Nicolas gave it vent and went to sit beside Nathan. He took his lover’s hand and squeezed it tightly.
“Nothing’s changed about my feelings for you. I loved you aboard Strawberry Fields and I love you now. We’ll get to the bottom of what happened to you. Especially with Jasper on the case. Now you’re welcome by my mother and sister, and they are all the family’s opinion I care about. But if they hadn’t welcomed you, I would have chosen you over them.”
“No.” Nathan’s exclamation was a bare breath of air, but Nicolas refused to let him pull away, and nodded fiercely.
“Yes! You are my future, the man I love.” Nicolas softened his voice, leaned forward, and dropped a quick kiss to Nathan’s lips. “Now, stop worrying, Mother and Amaretta both liked you. Drink your tea, relax, and enjoy being here. But I need to find another source of employment.”
“I hope to ultimately use Melbeck’s ship for the purpose he claimed it to have.” Jasper sat back, his eyes half-closed. “I don’t have sufficient funds at present. But I do have a mind to leave the force, and that would most certainly be good, well-rewarding work. However, we have a mystery to solve first.”
“I don’t have the words to express how grateful I am to have you in my life.” Nathan pressed a kiss to Nicolas’s cheek, then glanced over at Jasper. “Both of you.”
Tea was brought through, and there were some small sandwiches and tiny cakes to accompany it. When Nicolas looked at his sister, Amaretta looked studiously elsewhere, then focused her attention on Jasper.
“Is there anything we can do, practically as you might say, to help Nathan with his memory?” Amaretta directed her question to Jasper who smiled at her.
“Perhaps if you shared memories of things you liked, or did, when a child.” Jasper shook his head. “I’m no expert, Miss Broadberry, but perhaps that might bring a suppressed memory of Nathan’s to the fore.”
“Oh, please call me Amaretta. Nicolas said that you and he were good friends. I dislike over-formality when I’m at home. That sounds like an excellent suggestion, don’t you think so, Nicolas?”
“Yes. A great idea.” Nicolas nodded. “Perhaps a favorite childhood toy?”
“Like a favorite teddy bear, or maybe a rocking horse or some other favorite toy. I loved my rocking horse.” Arabella sighed. “My bedroom had large pink roses on the walls.”
“Blue. I remember blue on the walls.” Nathan’s voice was soft, his eyes closed, and a smile curved his lips. “And a tall lady with red hair, and it glittered … like … like tiny stars. There was a rocking horse, it had big grey spots. Nicolas! I remembered something.” Nathan opened his eyes widely and clutched at Nicolas who could hardly contain his own excitement.
“Yes, indeed, my love. Well done. Well done indeed.” Nicolas wished he could express his gratitude to Jasper, but the satisfied smile on the other man’s face told its own story.
“Don’t push things, Nathan. But every so often, look at something in the present, and see if you can remember it in the past.” Jasper leaned forward and patted Nathan’s knee. “Good show. Good show, indeed.”
“I was told not to try to remember. That it would induce fevers and seizures. How many lies did they tell about me? And why?”
Not wanting Nathan’s spirits to sink, Nicolas squeezed his lover’s hands. “Jasper will find the truth. I’m sure of it. And now that we know you can try to remember, without any fear of a seizure, I’m sure the fugue will crumble away. Let’s look to our future as we solve the mystery of your past.”
“Yes. Thank you, Nicolas.” Nathan nodded, and a look of determination glinted in his mesmeric eyes.
****
Later that evening, when Nicolas and Nathan had retired to bed, Nicolas wasn’t surprised that Nathan struggled to settle. Finally, he took his lover in his arms, and settled them with Nathan lying on top.
“Tell me what’s bothering you,” he whispered against Nathan’s cheek.
“I can’t stay here with you and your sister while you both go out to work and I do nothing, Nicolas.”
If Nicolas was honest, the objection wasn’t in the least unexpected, and he was proud of his lover who was so determined to be an equal partner in all they did. But it didn’t change the fact that Nicolas worried about Nathan, and his frailer health.
However, as Nathan was stretched out above him, cradled comfortably between Nicolas’s spread thighs, there was no way for him to physically dodge his lover. Nicolas needed to be mindful over his reply.
“I understand what you’re saying, my love, but what work can you do? Aboard the Strawberry, your care of the conservatory was exemplary. Back here, that kind of work doesn’t exist. You could be a gardener, of course, but that work would be incredibly physical.” Nicolas gazed up at Nathan who huffed an impatient breath, his brows drawn together in a deep frown.
“I don’t know. I just need to do … do something.”
“I know.” Nicolas ran his fingertips up and down Nathan’s back, toying with the dimples at the base of his lover’s spine. “Look, let’s not worry about it now. There’s a lot you need to do before you think about finding work.”
“There is?” Nathan’s frown vanished, and he leaned down to kiss Nicolas before cocking his head to the side. “What?”
“Your leg was falsely imprisoned in that brace for a long time. You still limp because the muscles are weaker. You must exercise it regularly. But not out on the streets here.” Nicolas gripped more tightly to Nathan. This wasn’t a good neighborhood, and Nicolas didn’t trust the streets to be safe for such a gentle soul as Nathan. “Promise me, you won’t leave the house on your own.”
“I promise. I can keep it clean and tidy for you. And I learned a little of cooking food. It’s not much, but it’s something I can do for you and Amaretta. I just feel so out of place everywhere. I don’t know where I truly belong.”
“I do. Here.” Nicolas slid his hands up Nathan’s body and wrapped his arms around Nathan’s trim waist, hugging him tightly against his chest. “You belong right here, with me.” Cupping the back of Nathan’s head, Nicolas drew him down for a kiss, delighting in the way Nathan seemed to melt against his body.
Nicolas thrust his tongue past Nathan’s lips, deepening the kiss, and rolling them gently so that he was now on top. Nathan grasped at Nicolas’s back, sucking on Nicolas’s tongue. There was no way for them to make love as Nicolas wanted, not with his mother and sister in the house. But as they kissed and ground against one another, his desire for Nathan wouldn’t be denied.
Pausing only to breathe before kissing Nathan again, Nicolas reached between their bodies to take both hard, hot pricks in his hand. He swallowed Nathan’s deep groan, as Nathan writhed beneath him. Digging his fingers harder into Nicolas’s back, Nathan tried to thrust as Nicolas rhythmically squeezed their cocks.
The sensations were too good to resist for long. Nathan spilled first, shuddering beneath Nicolas as ecstasy overcame him and Nicolas quickly followed him, muffling his lover’s moans with his own mouth.
His wits returned as Nicolas’s heart’s thundering beat slowed, and Nicolas eased his mouth from Nathan’s, kissing each corner before pressing butterfly kisses up Nathan’s cheek and on each still-closed eye.
A deep sigh escaped Nathan’s red, kiss-swollen lips, and he opened his eyes to gaze at Nicolas with such love, that it took Nicolas’s breath away.
“I love you, Nicolas. So very much.”
“I love you, too.” Nicolas brushed his lips against Nathan’s before reaching for the towel he’d left beside the bed. He wiped their bodies down, tossed the towel aside, and they settled with Nathan pressed tight against Nicolas’s body, his head on Nicolas’s shoulder.
Within seconds, Nathan was asleep, his breath deep and even. Nicolas kissed the top of his lover’s head. Amaretta has her work in the millinery shop, and I will find something I can do. There will be no need for Nathan to work, unless he finds something suited to his gentle nature. I hope and pray Jasper may unlock the secrets to his past.
Nicolas closed his eyes, Nathan’s soft snores lulling him into sleep.
Chapter Twenty-Three
The reward money Nicolas and Nathan received for Ironlegs was safely deposited at Nicolas’s bank. Having it to fall back on meant that Nicolas didn’t have to rush into another job.
With his mother away, and Amaretta spending most of her evenings with Jasper, Nicolas was finally able to relax and enjoy Nathan’s company. Already his lover’s limp was diminishing. Their life was improving with each passing day.
That evening, Nicolas sat opposite Nathan at the small table while they played cards. The slam of the front door made them both jump and Nicolas turned around to see Amaretta storm in, her face like thunder, carrying two large boxes.
“I hate my job.” Amaretta dropped the boxes to the floor and pouted angrily. “I have to create a hat.”
“Create…? But surely they don’t expect you to make a hat for a patron?” Nicolas rose to his feet. He recognized the imminent signs of Amaretta having a full-blown temper tantrum.
“Oh, I have the basic hat, but I have to decorate it.” Amaretta scowled at the boxes. “I have not one single iota of decorative talent, and that millinery witch knows it. I mean … look at it all.” She scooped up the boxes and deposited them on the table, opening them up to display the contents.
With a stamp of her foot, Amaretta indicated boxes of ribbons, bows, butterflies, beads, flowers, and a plethora of other pretty items designed to create a unique and personalized item. Nicolas felt sorry for his sister. She’d never shown any interest in such feminine knick-knacks growing up, and as an adult, clearly felt out of her depth.
“What’s the hat for?” Nathan peered over Amaretta’s shoulder at the plain straw hat.
“She’s going on a picnic, by a river. She may get to go out on a boat and wants something to suit the occasion. Why she can’t be satisfied with the boater as it is, I have no idea. I’m meant to be joining Jasper for an evening at the opera tonight. Instead I’ll be drowning in these things.”
“Go.” Nathan moved closer to the boxes. “That is … if you trust me to create something for you?”
The breath caught in Nicolas’s throat. If Nathan could decorate the hat, he’d not only feel that he was contributing to the household, but also make a friend of his sister for life.
“Oh, Nathan!” Amaretta clutched at Nathan’s arms. “Really? Are you sure? Oh, thank you so much. I’m sure you’ll do a much better job. Needle and threads are in that small velvet box. I had no idea what to bring, so I filled them both up. Now, I can get ready for Jasper.”
Amaretta was gone in a flurry of skirt and petticoat that even left Nicolas breathless. As the door closed behind her, he finally felt able to laugh out loud.
“Have you ever done anything like this before?” Nicolas gave the various boxes a closer examination. In a way, these buttons and bows were a little like his gears and cogs. But Nicolas would much rather be working with something mechanical than be adorning a lady’s hat.
“No. But, they’re all so very beautiful.” Nathan picked up a rose. “I remember … a lady in a pale blue hat, with dark blue flowers, and a short veil, the color of the hat matched her dress. She was standing in a garden, by rose bushes.” Nathan turned to face Nicolas. “I’m sure she was the same red-haired lady I remembered previously.”
Without speaking, Nicolas fingered the long, auburn tresses of his lover. It would be so easy to think Nathan was remembering his mother, but he didn’t want to build up hope only for it to come crashing down on his lover.
“Then she must be very special to you in some way. Of that I’m sure.” Nicolas rested his forehead on Nathan’s. “I wish there was more I could do to help you, Nathan.”
“You love me. I couldn’t ask for anything more than that,” Nathan whispered. “I love you, Nicolas.”
“I do love you, and it means the world to me to hear you say you love me.” Nicolas leaned back and placed a gentle kiss to Nathan’s brow. “No matter what, you’ll always have my love.”
“I couldn’t ask for anything more precious. Now, you settle with your journals. I have an idea for the hat, but don’t know if my skills are up to the challenge.”
Pleased to see Nathan so interested in doing something that was also going to be beneficial to Amaretta, Nicolas settled himself more comfortably into his chair.
“Well, if you need me for anything, just give me a shout. I’m going to read these journals. I may not have my own workshop at the moment, but I will again.” Although making the offer, Nicolas was quite sure Nathan wouldn’t need his help.
And judging by the absent-minded hum, Nathan wasn’t even listening to him. Nicolas glanced over at his lover. Nathan had already pulled out some reams of ribbon and was rummaging enthusiastically through the boxes of buttons and other decorations.
As if suddenly aware of the scrutiny, Nathan looked up and smiled at Nicolas. “Oh, yes. I will. Thank you, Nicolas. Enjoy your journals.”
“And you your decorating.” Nicolas wriggled back into the chair and picked up his first journal. They were a little old, but that didn’t matter. His mind went to Rusty and Patch, wishing he hadn’t needed to leave them aboard Strawberry, but there was no space for them in the tiny house. Perhaps I can work on refining them. They’d be ideal working in any capacity where strength was needed.
Thoughts swirling in his head, Nicolas began to read.
Chapter Twenty-Four
It was with a start that Nicolas realized that Nathan was calling his name. With a soft groan, he stretched cramped muscles, realizing that at some point he must have dozed off.
“Are you awake, sleepyhead? I want you to look at this and tell me what you think.”
“I’m sorry, my love. I must have drifted off. What is it you wa—?” Nicolas stopped dead as he saw the hat Nathan had been working on.
Gone was the plain straw boater and in its place a masterpiece of fabric artistry. Instead of a mere band around the crown, two different shades of blue overlapped—dark blue closest to the brim and the ribbons were shaped to imitate rolling waves with sky blue above it.
On the dark blue sea, Nathan had created little boats of different colors in velvet and lace, tufts of white lace were clouds on the light blue ribbon along with a yellow silk sun. At the back of the hat sat a bow in dark blue, light blue, and yellow, and trails of ribbon ran down from it.
It was the most amazing hat Nicolas had ever seen. He looked from the hat to Nathan who gazed back at him with wide eyes and nibbled at his lower lip.
“Nathan, my love, that’s … that’s incredible. Amazing.” Nicolas surged to his feet, laughing, not knowing what to say. “No one will have ever seen a hat like this. Amaretta will be so delighted.”
“You’re sure. You’re really sure?”
Nicolas scrambled to his feet and went over to look more closely at his lover’s masterpiece.
“Surely you’ve done this before?”
; Nathan shook his head and shrugged. “I don’t remember, but I seemed to know how to sew them together, and I thought I remembered … something, a … a sense of peace and contentment.”
“Maybe it was something you did with your mother. Your real mother, that is. Jasper will be pleased you’ve discovered something else, and Amaretta will be delighted to take such a stunning piece back to her Millinery Witch.”
Nathan face was alight with excitement and pride. “Do I … deserve a … a reward, do you think?” Nathan’s expression was coy, and there was a nervous hitch to his voice, but the gleam in his eyes was anything but coy or nervous, and Nicolas grinned.
“Oh, I think so. Come and sit here.” Nicolas sat back down and patted his knee.
Although his cheeks glowed red, Nathan straddled Nicolas’s thighs, and Nicolas held lightly to Nathan’s hips. Sliding them up Nathan’s sides, Nicolas ran them over his lover’s chest, flicking open the buttons of his shirt to reveal the pale, smooth skin beneath.
“So beautiful.” Leaning forward, Nicolas pressed soft kisses along Nathan’s collarbone and onto the newly revealed flesh. “I’m a blessed man to have met you, to be worthy of your love.”
On reaching his lover’s left nipple, Nicolas encircled it with his lips and flicked his tongue back and forth. Nathan moaned softly, and arched cat-like into the caress. Kissing his way across Nathan’s chest, Nicolas sought out the neglected twin and gave it the same, sensual treatment.
Nicolas ran his hands over Nathan’s chest, up his throat to frame his face, before urging him into a kiss. Running his tongue over Nathan’s lips, Nicolas slid his tongue deep into his lover’s mouth as Nathan opened to him.
For long minutes, the kiss ebbed and flowed between them. Nicolas’s arousal spiraled upward when Nathan slid his tongue along Nicolas’s before sucking the slick organ into his mouth.
They couldn’t risk going further knowing that Amaretta and Jasper would be home soon, but Nicolas would reward Nathan with a far more intimate surprise once they retired to bed. Slowly, reluctantly, he eased back, peppering Nathan’s cheeks with butterfly kisses.