Her mind was racing when she got to work and filled out the forms to take two weeks off. She wasn’t going to tell anyone where she was going or what she was planning to do. She didn’t want to jinx it, and nothing was definite yet, nothing was formalized or signed, only a verbal agreement the network had made with Zack. But he had a golden reputation for delivering first-rate shows. She knew it was an insecure business where deals fell apart all the time and shows got canceled at the drop of a hat. She didn’t want to make a fool of herself by telling people about it if that were to happen, at least until the deal was signed. And she didn’t even have an agent yet. She was sure that it would all feel real to her after the contracts were in place, but that was still down the line.
“How did your meeting go yesterday?” Carmen asked when she stuck her head in Kait’s office on her way to an editorial meeting. She was curious after seeing Kait dressed up the day before, and she liked knowing what was going on.
“It was fine,” Kait said vaguely, feeling like a liar, but they weren’t close enough for Kait to share something as confidential and important as that. She thought her children should know first, and it was too soon to tell them. It wasn’t a done deal yet.
“You look a lot happier today,” Carmen commented, and Kait smiled.
“I am.” She didn’t mention the time she was taking off to go to L.A. She couldn’t without explaining why, and she hadn’t come up with a good excuse yet.
“Do you want me to grab some salads on the way back?” Carmen volunteered.
“I’d love it. Mediterranean, thanks.” They were good pals at work, but not best friends.
“See you at one,” Carmen promised. Kait filled out the rest of the vacation form after she left, and had her assistant drop it off at HR. It was an odd feeling, wondering if she’d be working there at the end of the year, or too busy with the show. She tried not to think about it as she opened a thick file of letters on her desk, with the most recent ones she had to answer for the column. It rapidly brought her back to earth. She had a job to do here, the same one she had done for nineteen years, writing an agony column for Woman’s Life. Hollywood could wait. It would have to for now. This was her bread and butter, and she wasn’t going to forget that. But she was excited to see her story come alive, with real actors portraying the characters she had created. She wondered who they’d get, and then forced her mind back to the mundane realities of what she had to do that day.
She and Carmen had a nice time, gossiping and laughing over their salads at her desk.
“You keep getting this faraway look in your eye,” Carmen accused her halfway through lunch. “What’s up?” She wondered if Kait had met a man.
“I’m just tired. I didn’t sleep much last night.”
“You need a vacation,” her friend said matter-of-factly.
“I’m going to London to see Candace when she gets back.” And then she realized she had the perfect excuse for the trip to L.A. “And I thought I’d go see Stephanie in San Francisco in a couple of weeks, and maybe Tom on the way back.”
“I mean a real vacation, like somewhere warm. I could use some of that myself,” Carmen said wistfully.
“Yeah, me too,” Kait said vaguely, and drifted off again, to her visions of L.A. and what was waiting for her there, or would be soon. “That’s good advice,” she said about the vacation. “Maybe I can talk Steph into a weekend in L.A. when I’m out there.”
Carmen nodded and stood up to throw away the plastic cartons from their lunch. A weekend in L.A. sounded sensible to her, if Kait was going to California to see her daughter.
“Get some sleep tonight,” Carmen admonished her. “You’re already half asleep now.” Kait laughed as the door closed behind her. But the best part was that she was wide awake, and the fantasy that was happening to her was real. She almost wanted to pinch herself to make sure it was.
Chapter 6
The two weeks before Kait was due to leave for California seemed to move at a snail’s pace. Everything in her everyday life seemed tedious now, and she could hardly concentrate on the letters she was answering, on subjects she had dealt with a thousand times before. All she wanted now was to get to L.A. and find out what was happening with the project.
She felt guilty going to L.A. without seeing Stephanie in San Francisco, but she wouldn’t have time. Zack had a dozen meetings lined up at the network to introduce her and to discuss aspects of the show and the direction they were heading with the story line. He was having her meet agents and the director he wanted, and she had to spend time with the screenwriter. That was essential, they needed to get her started as soon as possible, once Kait approved her, if they were going to stay on schedule. And Zack wanted Kait at their casting calls. He felt it was important for her to see the actors, since all three women they would hire were the essence of the show, and it was essential that they felt right to Kait, so they didn’t get off track from her concept, although the network would inevitably demand changes as they went along.
There was a lot to do in the time Kait was planning to spend there, she didn’t see how they would fit it all in. Zack called her three days before she was due to leave. When she heard his voice, she was suddenly overwhelmed with panic again that the whole project had been canceled. She still couldn’t believe it was going to happen. It still seemed so unreal to her. But all the pieces of the machine were moving forward in the complicated mechanism of putting a show together. And Kait was well aware of how much she had to learn about it. The contract alone, conditions, and benefits to her over time sounded so complex she could barely understand them, which was why Zack said she needed an agent and possibly even an entertainment lawyer, and he was going to find them for her. They had to take care of that immediately, while he dealt with the financial aspects with the cable network they were working with, and the “front” and “back end” arrangements, which sounded like Chinese to her.
“There’s someone I want you to meet,” he said after a minute. He sounded rushed and busy, as he always did, juggling so many shows and trying to develop new ones. He always had a thousand balls in the air, and this was going to be a big one, and would take a lot of work and meetings to get things started. They could have made a pilot themselves and sold it to the network later, which he had done many times. But getting the network involved right in the beginning was a much better way to go, and gave them a lot more money for production. This way, they already knew the network loved it and could produce a truly high-end show.
They were still debating whether to shoot it in California or New York. They needed a location with plenty of room for Loch Wilder’s airplanes, their air freight enterprise and charter business, and a small airstrip. They would be using several stunt pilots in the cast, and a whole fleet of vintage airplanes. Zack already had scouts looking for planes and locations on both coasts. It would cost about the same to shoot in either place, so the network didn’t care where they chose.
“She can see you tomorrow,” Zack said cryptically, as Kait waited to hear the rest.
“Who am I meeting?”
There was a moment’s pause before he answered, not for drama, but because he was signing checks for another show while he talked to her, with his assistant waiting next to him. “I called her last week and she said she’d think about it. She’s never done TV before, and needed to adjust her thinking to what television is now. It’s not like the old days when there was a stigma attached to doing TV. Now some of the biggest names in the business are in series. She gets that, and she just called me back. She wants to meet you to understand the character better, and make sure it’s right for her.”
Everything he said made sense to Kait, but she could hardly stand the suspense. He had hinted at this before.
“We want her for the part of Anne Wilder, obviously. She’s not old enough for the grandmother. I think she’s perfect for us, if we can grab
her. She’d have to be able to do work in features during the hiatus, she’s not going to give that up for us. She’s already won two Oscars, and a Golden Globe. I promised her another Golden Globe for this one,” he said, laughing, as Kait waited to hear who it was, but was already vastly impressed. “I worked on a film with her a long time ago. I was a lowly assistant then, and she doesn’t remember me. She’s an amazing woman. You’ll love her, Kait. Maeve O’Hara,” he said, as though mentioning some ordinary person he had met on the street.
“Maeve O’Hara?” Kait asked with reverence and awe. “For our show? Are you serious?”
“I’d like to be. Let’s see if she is. She’s not making any promises. She said she wants to meet you before she goes any further. I think you’re going to love each other.” In Zack’s mind, Kait had some of the same qualities as Maeve, a mix of talent and humility, with her feet on the ground. “She said she can see you at four tomorrow. She suggested a deli in her neighborhood. You can share a pastrami sandwich,” he said, teasing Kait. “She’s a very down-to-earth person, she has two daughters who are trying to be actresses. I’m not sure they have her talent, few people do, and they’re very young. If we can sign Maeve for this, we have a sure shot at a major hit show. This story, and the part of Anne, are made for her. I want you to meet her before you leave New York and come out here. If we have Maeve attached to the project, we can get anyone we want. Other actors will kill to work with her. Knock her dead, Kait. I know you will.”
For an instant, Kait didn’t know what to say. She was overwhelmed. “I’ll try,” she said, hoping not to seem starstruck or ridiculous, but she was about to meet Maeve O’Hara, one of the biggest female stars in the business, at a deli the next day. “I’m not used to this, Zack. I don’t want to blow it.”
“You will be used to it by the time we get going. And something tells me that you two will wind up friends. Just be yourself, and tell her about Anne Wilder. I think she’ll see how right it is for her. I sent her the bible last week, that’s why she called me back. That’s going to be tough for her to resist, if it fits in with her plans. She’s always working on something, although she said she’s taking a break at the moment, for personal reasons, and not starting any new projects. But that never lasts long with talent like hers. She’s a workaholic like the rest of us. She’ll be doing something again soon, and I want it to be this. I’ll shoot her an email and tell her you can make it.”
He told Kait the name and location of the deli, and she jotted it down. It was on West Seventy-second Street. Maeve lived at the Dakota on Central Park West, where lots of famous actors, producers, writers, and arty and intellectual people lived. It was a well-known building of enormous old apartments with views of the park. She wondered what Maeve’s apartment was like and if she’d ever see it.
“Call me after the meeting,” he told her, and they hung up. She had all day and night to think about it, and worry. She was way out of her comfort zone and normal life, meeting movie stars of Maeve O’Hara’s stature, but everything about what she was doing now was exciting. Whatever happened, meeting her for coffee in a deli was going to be a high point in Kait’s life.
Kait left work early the next day, and took the subway from work to the stop closest to where she was going. It was north of Lincoln Center. It was a cold day, but crisp and clear, and her nose was red, her eyes watering, and her hands frozen by the time she got to the deli, Fine and Schapiro, and walked in. She saw Maeve O’Hara immediately, sitting discreetly at a back table in a parka with a wool cap on. People had already recognized her but no one had bothered her. Kait approached her with her heart pounding, and Maeve smiled at her and seemed to know who she was. She was sipping a steaming cup of tea and looked just as cold as Kait.
“I should have had you to the apartment,” Maeve said apologetically, “but my husband isn’t well, and I try to keep traffic to a minimum for him. Our kids live with us, and that’s hectic enough.”
“It’s fine, and I envy you that,” Kait said as she sat down across from her, feeling like she was meeting an old friend. “Mine have all flown the coop,” Kait volunteered.
“Where do they live?” Maeve asked with interest as she studied Kait carefully, and liked what she saw. Maeve was a few years younger, but not by much. She hadn’t worn makeup, and rarely did when she wasn’t working. She had worn jeans and an old pair of riding boots, and a heavy sweater under her parka.
“San Francisco, Dallas, and wherever the BBC sends my middle daughter, if there’s a war on there. She’s based in London.”
“That must be hard on you,” Maeve said sympathetically, and Kait nodded. “My oldest daughter’s at Tisch at NYU and wants to be an actress. The youngest one is still trying to find herself. She dropped out of college last year as a freshman, and is doing Off Broadway, and so far she has gotten some really awful parts.”
The two women exchanged a smile as Kait sipped her coffee and felt instantly at ease with her. They had their kids in common, and she could sense that despite being a star, Maeve was an involved mother.
“I keep trying to brace myself for the empty nest, but so far no one’s going anywhere, thank God. They drive me crazy, and keep me grounded,” Maeve said, and they both laughed. “I’m going to be lost without them, when they finally move out. I keep waiting on them hand and foot, so they don’t want to leave. Food service, laundry, their friends drop by at midnight. Until Ian got sick, we had an open house. It’s more complicated now.”
Kait didn’t want to pry and ask what her husband was sick with. She got the feeling it was serious from the look in Maeve’s eyes when she said it. She knew that Maeve was married to Ian Miller, a famous actor who had become a director many years ago.
“I’ve read your column, by the way. I love it. I used to read it whenever Ian and I had a fight, to figure out whether to call a divorce lawyer or forgive him. I think you’ve kept our marriage together.” She laughed and Kait grinned, pleased that she read it. “You’ve helped me a lot with the girls too. Contrary to common belief, nineteen and twenty-one are not easy ages. One minute they’re grown women, attacking you, and the next minute they’re babies and you want to send them to their room and can’t. How old are yours?”
“Twenty-six to thirty-two, a son and two daughters. My son, Tom, lives in Dallas, and has become a Texan, married to a girl from Dallas. My daughter Candace is in London, and Stephanie, my youngest, works for Google in San Francisco, she’s a computer geek and went to MIT. They’re all different. I had them when I was barely more than a kid myself. Their father left when they were very young, and the kids and I are very close.”
“I’m very close to Tamra and Thalia too, my two girls. How do you manage without them now?” Maeve looked worried as she asked. It was the universal fear of many women.
“I stay very busy. As my grandmother used to say whenever things changed, ‘That was then, this is now.’ It’s not an easy concept, but you’re better off if you accept it and don’t look back at what used to be.”
Maeve was trying to do that with her husband, and a cloud passed over her eyes for an instant as Kait said it. The two women seemed to understand each other instinctively.
“So tell me about Anne Wilder. Who is she really?” Maeve asked, moving on to the bible she had read and fallen in love with.
“I’m not sure how she happened. I just sat down to write a story, and she sprang to life. In a modified version, at a different time, I think I was channeling my grandmother, who was a brave and fascinating woman, totally gutsy, real, and incredibly brave. And she had an amazing optimism and philosophy of life. She had some really hard times and never complained. She just did whatever she had to do to fix it. To be honest, thanks to her, I’ve always had a safety net under me to some degree. It was hard raising three kids alone, and we’ve faced all the same problems everyone else does. But my grandmother didn’t have that net under her
, she had to weave the net herself. She was smart and resourceful. She convinced me that I could face anything I had to.”
She told her grandmother’s story then, and Maeve listened with fascination and respect for Constance Whittier and her granddaughter, who was so much like Constance but didn’t know it or take credit for it. Maeve thought that Kait was brave too, just as Maeve was trying to be, as the sands were shifting under her, and she had no map to chart her course yet. She was flying by the seat of her pants, as brave women did. Men were more methodical, and women more intuitive.
“Anne Wilder is like that in the story I wrote. I love stories where women succeed against the odds in a man’s world. It’s ten times harder for us than it is for guys, and it certainly was then, in aviation during and after the war, and for my grandmother in 1930, building a business and selling cakes and cookies to restaurants and grocery stores with four kids to feed. I can’t even imagine how she did it.”
Maeve could see the tie between the fictional character and the grandmother Kait described. “I love women like that,” Maeve said quietly, watching Kait’s eyes and deciding to confide in her. “We’re keeping it quiet, to avoid the press, but Ian was diagnosed with ALS last year. It’s been rough. He did all right until recently, but it’s a degenerative disease and it’s getting worse. We have nurses for him now. He’s still mobile, but he’s getting weaker, and his breathing is a problem. It could go on for a long time, but it’s only going to head in one direction.
“He’s very strong, and he wants me to go on working. I’ve slowed down and I’ve been turning down projects, but when I read your story, Anne Wilder is who I want to be when I grow up. I’d love to do the project, but I’m not sure what I’d do if Ian gets worse quickly. I think we still have a few decent years left, but you can’t predict that. One thing I do know, if I do it, we’d have to shoot it in New York. I won’t move him to California. We have a good setup here and fantastic doctors, and I don’t want to be away from him. If I’m working here, at least I’ll come home every night, and they can shoot around me if he has a crisis.”
The Cast Page 7