“You need to stop writing to me. In fact, you need to stop trying to contact any of us full stop. Did you forget we all helped put you here? None of us are interested in having you in our lives. Not after what you did to Mum. Not after what you did to Dante and the twins and especially not after what you’ve done to me.”
Ellie squeezed my thigh, knowing how difficult it was for me to say these things to my father.
“I don’t really care what you have to say. We’re fine without you. The company is fine without you. We don’t need you in our lives.”
The silence which followed my words weighed heavily on my chest. Dad just looked at me and his gaze penetrated through all my walls as usual. I felt like the small boy who was terrified of his father all over again. The one who hid when he heard arguing and shouting between his parents. Who saw all the bruises on his mother and brother no matter how hard they tried to hide them. That little boy was scared shitless the same thing would happen to him. And it had.
But that little boy wasn’t me any longer. I was a grown man. I had a future to build with the woman beside me and my father wasn’t going to get in the way of that.
“Did your brother put you up to this?”
I frowned. Why would he think Dante sent me?
“No. Dante didn’t want me visiting you.”
My dad shook his head, his eyes hardening.
“Do you think your little speech has me cowering in my shoes?”
I resisted the urge to flinch. I was stronger than this. His words weren’t going to bring me down.
“No. I’m asking you to leave us alone because it’s the right thing to do. Not that you even know what the right thing is. The only good thing you ever did was plead guilty.”
He scoffed, rolling his eyes.
“Well, your brother’s little girlfriend gave me something in exchange.”
“You mean his wife.”
Dad raised his eyebrow, surprise flittering across his features.
“He married the Stewart girl?”
“Yes, Dad. He loves her.”
And she gave him what he needed in return. Someone who accepted him just the way he was. Who loved him fiercely and would do anything to protect him. Even visit the man who haunted his entire existence and ask him to plead guilty to save his children the pain of a trial. The man who’d put her in Dante’s path in the first place and threatened her at every turn. I couldn’t ask for a better woman for my brother. One so giving and always tried to see the best in those around her. Liora was all that and more.
Dad would never understand that though. He’d never see what Liora had done for Dante.
“And none of you thought to inform me that my eldest son was getting married?”
Is he for real?
“You lost the right to know anything about our lives. You took Mum away from us, ruined the twins’ lives, blackmailed Dante and almost killed me. Do you really think you deserve anything from us?”
His eyes narrowed to slits, but for once, it didn’t fill me with terror. He couldn’t do anything to me in here. There were prison guards watching us and even if there weren’t, I wouldn’t let him do anything to me or Ellie. I’d sworn to protect her with my life if it came down to it.
“You are still my children.”
“You might have had a hand in creating us but you’re not our father. A real father wouldn’t abuse his kids. A real father would treat his children with the respect they deserve and not talk down to them or make them feel worthless.”
He was about to open his mouth again but I put my hand up. If he thought I was going to sit here and listen to any more of his bullshit, he had another think coming.
“I’m not finished. My whole life I tried so hard to please you even though you constantly told me how disappointed you were in me. Well, Dad, guess what? I don’t give a shit if you’re disappointed in me or not. Your opinion doesn’t matter. Your approval is meaningless. The only reason I’m here is so you get it in your head. I do not need anything from you.”
I stood up abruptly, pushing my chair back and stepping away from the table. I put my hand out to Ellie and she jumped up, taking it and holding it tightly.
“If anything, Dad, you should be fucking honoured to have me, Dante and the twins as your children. It’s a shame you don’t get to see how far we’ve come and the wonderful people we have in our lives. Your daughter in law has made Dante into a better man and this girl right here, she’s the light of my life. She taught me how to stand up for myself. I hope you’re happy in here because all you’ve got is a lifetime of regrets to dwell on.”
Even though he looked thunderous, I didn’t care. I had Ellie by my side. My relationship with Dante was back on track and even my sisters and I had gotten that much closer.
“Goodbye Dad. This is the last time you’ll ever see me.”
I didn’t give him a chance to speak. I turned away, pulling Ellie with me.
“James, don’t walk away from me,” I heard his voice behind us but I ignored him.
Ellie’s hand tightened in mine. I glanced at her. She was smiling and in that moment, I knew I’d done the right thing coming here and telling him those things.
“James!”
I heard something crashing behind us, but we were almost at the door by that time.
“Benson, you need to settle down,” came another voice.
“He can’t just leave like that,” my father shouted.
“I won’t tell you again, Benson. Settle down.”
Ellie and I walked out of the visitor room and the voices were drowned out as the door shut behind us. Neither of us spoke as we went through the necessary procedures to leave the prison. I was smiling to myself the whole time. I’d never walked away from my father before. The freedom I felt warmed me from the inside out. Being weighed down by the burden that was my father had kept me from truly being able to move on.
When we were both sat in my car, Ellie turned to me, putting her hand on my arm.
“I’m so proud of you. I wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to come here, but I see now you needed this.”
I didn’t say anything, merely wrapped my hand around her neck and dragged her closer, pressing my lips to hers. The kiss wasn’t remotely gentle. It was all lips, tongues and hands grasping each other. An all-consuming kiss which felt like it went on forever until we both drew apart, breathing heavily.
“What was that for?” she whispered, putting her fingers to her swollen lips.
“For being there when I needed you the most. Fuck, Ellie, I can’t believe I just did that. I said all those things to him and he got so mad, but I just walked away. I actually walked away.”
She smiled, cupping my cheek.
“You did… and it was really, really hot,” she told me, whispering the last part.
I raised an eyebrow.
“It was?”
She nodded vigorously. The look in her eye told me I needed to get her back to the flat as soon as possible. And fuck if it didn’t make my cock harden immediately.
“Yeah, I’ve never seen you quite that assertive before. It shouldn’t have turned me on because of where we were, but it did.”
Fuck me.
“Hold that thought, sweetheart.”
We could discuss what just happened with my father later. What I wanted right now was to get my girlfriend naked and in bed, although I wouldn’t mind having her on the sofa or any other available surface. But I wasn’t about to fuck her in my Mini in a prison carpark.
You just wait, Ellie. I’ll show you just how assertive I can be.
Chapter Twenty Six
Ellie
As soon as we got in the door, James was on me. His mouth crashed against mine, his hands sliding into my coat and shoving it off my shoulders. I found myself pinned against the wall by the front door, his hands roaming down my sides as he devoured my mouth from the inside out. My heart was racing at a hundr
ed miles an hour. I needed him so badly, it hurt.
I hadn’t been lying when I said he was hot when he gave his father a piece of his mind. Honestly, I’d tried not to find it a turn on, but I did. When James took control, it got me all worked up. He’d shown me so much when it came to sex. Taught me how pleasurable it could be when you wanted the other person. And hell did I want James with a desperation which threatened to overtake me completely.
He gripped my thighs and hoisted me up on his hips. Tugging me away from the wall, he walked towards the bedroom. I was forced to hold onto his shoulders to stay upright as he continued to kiss me. Next thing I knew, I was thrown onto the bed and he was staring down at me, his ocean blue eyes dark with desire. The intensity in them scorched my skin.
“Strip. Now.”
Those two words shouldn’t make me shiver with anticipation, but they did. My hands went to my t-shirt, dragging it off my head before I slipped my trainers off along with my socks. He watched me, not making a move to take his own clothes off. My jeans came next and soon I was lying there, completely bare for him.
“On your knees.”
I crawled off the bed and knelt in front of him, staring up at the man who completely consumed me. James had my heart and soul in the palm of his hand. I’d do anything for him.
“Take my cock out, sweetheart. I want your lips wrapped around it.”
I ran my hands up his thighs before I stroked one across his cock. He jerked and growled. I flicked open the button of his trousers and unzipped them. Dragging down both his trousers and boxers so they sat on his thighs, I stroked my fingers down his length. His eyes darkened further when I looked up at him. My submission turned him on. He liked telling me what to do and having me obey. It was usually only this way in the bedroom between us, although it had spilt outside into our normal lives once or twice. I found I didn’t mind it so much then anyway. This was James, the man I loved.
I gripped his cock and circled the crown with my tongue. His fingers curled into my hair and the low moan escaping from his lips spurred me on.
He liked me on my knees. Said it was his ultimate fantasy when it came to me. We’d played it out multiple times. Just like this. But today was different. There was a heady cocktail of need pulsing between us which hadn’t been there before. At least not quite this potent. It wasn’t just that. James was different. Freer. As if the burdens of his past were no longer haunting him and he’d allowed himself to embrace this side of him which he’d hated for so long.
Instead of taking him in my mouth, I trailed my tongue down his length, watching his expression intently. His hand in my hair tightened. His cock pulsed against my tongue.
“Ellie,” he growled, his voice full of warning.
I wasn’t scared of him like I had been with my masters. He’d never harm me. So I continued my path, making sure to lavish his cock completely with my tongue, getting him worked up further which I knew would do nothing to help the dark turn his mood had taken. The thing is I wanted that darkness. I wanted him.
When I finally did what he wanted and wrapped my lips around him, his mouth twitched and his other hand curled around my jaw. I froze for a moment, judging whether he’d let me do this myself or if he wanted me to open my mouth wider so he could fuck me without restraint. When he didn’t move, I took him deeper, my tongue running along the underside of his smooth skin.
“Fuck,” he grunted.
Next thing I knew, he’d thrust his hips forward and was hitting the back of my mouth. I tried not to gag since he’d taken me by surprise. I kept my jaw slack and let him take me the way he wanted to. He leant his head back as he closed his eyes. I knew in those moments this wasn’t going to be long and drawn out. I placed my other hand on his thigh to steady myself against the onslaught of his cock driving in and out of my mouth.
“Fuck me, sweetheart,” he practically shouted before he came violently, his cum coating my mouth in hot, sticky streams. His hands dug further into my scalp and my jaw but I didn’t protest.
He almost slumped forward when his cock stopped twitching, but he righted himself and pulled out of my mouth, letting go of my face. I swallowed, making sure it didn’t dribble out of my mouth. He was coated in my saliva and cum, so I leant forward and cleaned him up with my tongue. I sat back on my knees when I was done, staring up at him. Waiting for his next command. He smiled at me, his whole face lighting up. Some of the darkness in his expression had faded, but there was a feral undertone to the way he was looking at me.
“Lay back on the bed, leave your legs over the edge.”
I shifted, doing exactly as he asked. I was about to have my world blown apart by the most damn attractive man I’d ever laid eyes on. James unbuttoned his shirt and discarded the rest of his clothes. We’d gone straight to the prison after he’d finished work earlier so he was still dressed for the office. He knelt between my legs and ran his fingers up my inner thighs. Leaning down, he replaced his fingers with his lips, kissing his way up until he’d almost reached my pussy. I sucked in a breath, watching him with my hands curled up by my sides.
“I love you, sweetheart,” he told me, his hot breath dusting over my clit and making my insides clench. “I’m going to make you come on my tongue over and over again. I love the way you taste and seeing you moaning and panting for me. You’re so fucking sexy, especially like this, spread wide open… just for me.”
Being with James made me less self-conscious about the way I looked. About my scars. He told me every day without fail how beautiful I was. And the way he worshipped my body during sex? Well, that was something else.
He’d kissed away my fears.
He’d restored my confidence.
He was the balm to my bruised and aching soul.
The man I never knew I needed.
He healed me and in return, I’d mended him too.
I sat up, needing to be closer to him. He looked up at me, confusion flittering across his face as I ran my hand up the back of his neck and curled it into his hair. I leant down, brushing my nose against his.
“You are my world,” I whispered. “I appreciate everything you do for me. I love you, James, so, so, so much.”
The sexual tension was still there between us, potent and unyielding, but there was something else too. Love and understanding bled from our pores, permeating the air. So when he kissed me, I melted into his touch, kissing him back with as much fervour and passion.
When we pulled apart, he put his hand on my shoulder and pressed me back down on the bed, his expression wicked. My back had barely hit the mattress when his tongue met my clit. My hips bucked and a loud moan tumbled out of my mouth.
He made good on his promise. Within minutes, I was crying out his name and practically riding his face whilst he kept my thighs open with both hands clamped down on them. He didn’t stop there. I’d barely come down from my high when his fingers were inside me and his tongue was latched back onto my clit. The intensity almost blinded me. I gripped his hair, trying to pry him off me, but it was fruitless. His ocean blue eyes were almost pools of black as he brought me to a second and third climax in quick succession.
Just when I thought I was utterly spent after he’d ravaged my pussy with his tongue, he sat up on his knees and thrust inside me. I cried out, gripping the sheets as his cock filled me up to the hilt.
“Fuck, James!”
It didn’t hurt. He just took me by surprise. There was no let up as he slammed into me over and over again, his grip on my hips almost bruising. I wrapped both my legs around his waist, my feet digging into his back. The darkness in his eyes set my body on fire. He was hitting all the right spots, causing me to tremble and shake below him as I held on for dear life.
He leant over me and captured a nipple in his mouth, biting down hard. My fingers tangled in his hair, arching into him because it felt so damn good. I cried out his name over and over because he was all I saw and felt. Right here. Right now. It was just me
and him. Nothing else mattered.
When he kissed me, drowning out my cries, it was bruising. He held onto my face and kept me in place whilst he continued to almost punish me with his cock. Except it wasn’t much of a punishment when it felt this amazing. I didn’t think I’d be able to come again after three blissful times on his tongue, but I was wrong. So very wrong. My fingers dug into his hair as the waves crashed over me. The intensity was unlike anything else. I turned away from his face because I couldn’t hold back any longer.
“James, oh my god, fuck, James,” I almost screamed, clenching and releasing around him.
His ruthless pounding drew it out until I was a panting mess below him, completely unable to move. He thrust once, twice more and then he was grunting and moaning my name in my ear, his cock spurting inside me again and again.
He leant his head against my chest when he was spent. I stroked my fingers through his hair, ignoring how sweaty we both were. That had been out of this world and I wasn’t going to ruin the moment for a second. He let out a low hum of contentment, the sound vibrating through me where his chest was pressed against me.
“You’re perfect,” he whispered.
“Because I let you do whatever you want to me in the bedroom?”
He chuckled.
“No… though I appreciate that more than you know.”
He kissed my skin and it made me shiver.
“Mmm, then why am I perfect to you?”
He raised his head, resting his chin on my chest so he could look in my eyes.
“You’re beautiful, sexy, smart, kind, strong, brave, inspiring and… well… I love you.”
My heart felt as though it was so full it might burst. His eyes twinkled as he said those words, radiating love and affection. I could never doubt his feelings for me when he looked at me like that. Showing me just how much I meant to him without words.
Promises Page 27