Where had Gretchen gone to?
Hunter had pleaded with Gideon in the parlor of the house. He'd been given short shrift by the gruff and taciturn man. Almost on the verge of doing something he might have regretted Hunter, had begged Beatrice for some hint of where his new wife might be.
Hunter recalled how he'd stood in the parlor, fists like tight balls by his side, his face ashen, his eyes wide, desperately seeking an answer. Finally Beatrice had persuaded Hunter to sit down and had laid a gentle hand on his arm.
Lying on the bed with his wife in the room next door and the sounds of his children ringing in his ears, Hunter was suddenly glad that he hadn't gone and done anything stupid. Years of controlling the temper he'd inherited from his father had allowed Hunter to keep his cool, and he'd he'd been rewarded with a brief explanation from Gretchen's mother. It may not have been completely satisfying, nor had it fully explained his wife's sudden need to leave, but in the end Beatrice's partial account of Gretchen having to go back East for a short while, on a "very important errand" had had to suffice.
Hunter recalled looking at Beatrice with wondering eyes, asking for reassurance that there wouldn't be any further clues. This had been met with Beatrice's plea that Hunter trust her and Gretchen; that he wait; that he be patient; that all would be well, in the end.
And Hunter had reluctantly chosen to do just that.
He shifted nervously onto his back and gazed up at the ceiling, trying to figure out just how he'd managed to keep his cool during his wife's long absence. Every time he'd subsequently asked Beatrice for an explanation he'd been met with the same patient, kindly gaze and more reassurance that Gretchen was fine and that she'd be back soon.
On the visits to the house in Helena, Hunter had wondered if there ever would come a day when he'd arrive at the house to find Gretchen seated in the parlor, a smile on her face, and a full explanation for the torment she'd visited upon him.
But that had never happened.
It had been almost a whole year. And no-one had thought to tell him that while his wife had been gone she had given birth to two beautiful twins.
Hunter felt his throat tighten as the emotion rose up inside him. He'd lost so much while she had been gone. He'd lost the joy of her telling him she was expecting; he'd lost the chance to care for her and make sure she was healthy and safe; he'd lost being present at the birth of those beautiful babies.
His brow furrowed and he felt a burning ache settle in his gut. He'd lost so much.
How could she have done that to him? Why had she done such an incredible thing? There must have been a reason, he thought. There must have been something which had driven her to stay away from him, even during her pregnancy.
Things had gone quiet next door, and Hunter debated whether he should go back to the room. But, he didn't want to run the risk of disturbing the children who had obviously settled back to sleep. He thought of Gretchen lying on the bed, nestling the infants, cradling them, keeping them safe and secure. He'd watched her from his vantage point on the bed. In the soft moonlight he'd told himself he'd never seen a more beautiful sight in his life, than the image of his wife and their children settled on the wide bed. He'd savored the sounds of their breathing. Never in his life had he felt such a sense of connection to any other person than what he felt toward the three people who now meant more to him than anything on earth.
Was this what it meant to accept responsibility? Was this how it felt to lay aside resentment and decide that the past should be left behind, no matter what?
Hunter glanced out the window at the silver moon It was the same light that would be shining on his precious children in the room next door. He heard the door open and close quietly and the footsteps of Mrs. Roper as she made her way back to her own room. The housekeeper knew all about taking care of people, of focusing on what was important, setting aside trivial concerns. It seemed as if the housekeeper wasn't even giving the slightest thought to why Gretchen had been gone. She'd accepted Gretchen's return unconditionally.
The question that filled Hunter's mind was about that exact same thing. Could he forgive and trust his wife? Could they overcome the barrier that lay between them both and learn how to love once again?
CHAPTER EIGHT
"There is so much to do to look after those children," Mrs. Roper said smiling broadly and glancing down at the children. Gretchen had to agree.
It was the next morning. Gretchen and Hunter were at the kitchen table sharing their first breakfast as a family. The two children were in their little baskets. Hunter sat next to Gretchen tucking into a plate of ham and eggs. The twins were right where they belonged. By their parents' side. It felt good to be seated by his side with the children next to them, Gretchen thought. The simple act of watching her husband eat his breakfast, while she gently shook the side of one of the little baskets gave her a basic and elemental pleasure.
Gretchen took a sip of the coffee and placed the cup down on the table. "Where are you going today, Hunter?" she asked him.
He looked momentarily surprised. "I wasn't figuring on going anywhere," he declared. He placed his cup down and fixed her with a questioning look.
Gretchen nodded wordlessly. She looked across and saw the equal amount of surprise on Mrs. Roper's face.
"I thought you said you had to go into town and buy these children of ours some of the things they're going to need," she said tentatively.
"Don't recall saying that," Hunter said with a frown. "What do they need?"
Gretchen sighed. "Oh, you know. Blankets. Maybe a couple of cots."
"What happened to the ones back in Helena?"
"They'll be coming soon enough. Mama said she'd send the things over once she and papa get back to Helena," she explained.
Gretchen saw Hunter's knuckles whiten as he grasped his knife and fork. "Now that you mention it, maybe they should just leave that stuff where it is. I can get new things. The twins deserve that. After all, this is their new home," he said. "Problem is, I might not be able to go into town today," he said. He jammed the fork into his mouth and started chewing on the eggs.
Gretchen glanced at Mrs. Roper who'd suddenly gotten real busy with what was on the stove. The housekeeper's eyes flickered toward Gretchen with a hint of puzzlement in them. "It's just that I didn't realize just how much the twins will need. At some point we're going to have to get the things that are on my list," she said.
Hunter's eyes widened. "You've got a list?"
Gretchen nodded. "Sure have. And it's a long one," she answered with a wry grin.
Hunter frowned and started cutting the ham on his plate with quick, emphatic strokes of the knife. His brows had furrowed into thoughtful ridges.
Gretchen hesitated before continuing. A sudden flurry of nerves started to tumble in her belly. Why was she asking Hunter to go to town? Did she seriously want him to leave her alone at the ranch on their very first day back together? It didn't look good, that was for sure. No wonder Mrs. Roper had given her such a curious look.
Gretchen cleared her throat. "Maybe I should come with you," she offered tentatively.
Hunter looked up, and she could see his eyes were considering what she'd said. "I don't think that's necessary," he said glancing at the twins. "You need to be here. With the little ones."
Gretchen looked at Hunter and saw the sheer pride on his face. He was like a man transformed. The color of his cheeks changed every time he looked at the children; every time he even spoke about the children his features lit up with undisguised pleasure.
Gretchen was quietly gratified that Hunter had taken to the children so quickly. She had known he probably would, once he had a chance to welcome them into his life. All the way home, during the train ride to Montana with her mother, they'd talked about nothing else except how Hunter would react when he finally met the twins. Her mother had tried to allay Gretchen's fears about how Hunter would react. Beatrice had been emphatic that once Hunter saw the twins, his heart would melt. A
nd she had been right. Gretchen couldn't recall ever having seen Hunter looking like that.
Mrs. Roper put some more eggs on Hunter's plate. "If you're planning on going shopping for the little ones, you're going to need all your strength. There's a lot to be buying."
"Don't go spending too much money." Gretchen said.
Hunter waved a dismissive hand. "They're our children, Gretchen. I'll get them what they need, no matter what the cost. That's the way things are going to be from now on. You can bet on that."
Hunter's voice had a familiar defiant and determined tone. Gretchen recognized it from the few mild disagreements they'd had while planning the wedding. Hunter liked to get his way in things, almost as much as Gretchen did. It had usually meant for interesting times. It looked the weeks and months and years to come weren't going to be any different.
Gretchen reached across and checked the children. They were snug in their baskets. The impulse to reach in and lift Lewis out and hold him close to her was almost impossible to resist.
Gretchen saw Hunter watch what she was doing. There was a slight smile that creased the corners of his mouth. She realized she liked being watched by him. Especially when she did simple things that had to do with the care of the children.
Mrs. Roper cleared her throat while she started to clear away some of the remains of the breakfast preparations. "Forgive me offering my opinions on a personal matter," she started to say.
Hunter rolled his eyes. "Watch out. Here comes trouble," he said with a grin.
Mrs. Roper picked up a wooden spoon and waved it at Hunter. "You know what real trouble means around here," she said glancing at the spoon.
Gretchen smiled. "I don't think that's necessary, Mrs. Roper. Tell us what you're thinking," she said.
Mrs. Roper nodded her head once at Gretchen. "Thank you, Gretchen. Nice to see that at least one person around here has manners," she said.
Hunter sighed and shook his head. "I'm saying nothing."
Gretchen looked at Mrs. Roper and made it clear she wanted the housekeeper to continue.
"Unless you two are still fast asleep," the housekeeper said, "it can't have escaped your notice that this is the first day you've both had a chance to spend some time together in a long while. And I mean time alone."
"But I can't leave the twins at the ranch while I accompany Hunter into town," Gretchen said quickly.
She saw Hunter's eyes narrow after she uttered the words. "Then don't," he said bluntly.
Gretchen felt the color on her face change.
"I don't have to go anywhere right now," he continued his gaze locked firmly on Gretchen.
"But what about the ranch. Doesn't that need supervising?"
"That's why I employ men," he responded. He drew in a deep breath and leaned forward, planting his elbows on the wooden table. "I have men I trust. Men who can take over the affairs of the ranch on days like these. Special days."
Hunter sighed and peered at Gretchen. There was a determination in that gaze that made something shift inside Gretchen. "If I want to spend time alone with my wife, then I get what I want," he said slowly.
Hunter's eyes shifted from Gretchen to Mrs. Roper and back again to his wife. Did he suspect what she was trying to get him to do? Had he guessed that she was actually trying to get him to leave her at home with the twins? Had he cottoned onto the fact that she was trying to persuade him not to spend their first day back together as a couple?
Gretchen hadn't figured out in her mind why she would even want that. What was the barrier between herself and Hunter that was forcing her to try and get him to leave her alone? She'd tried to suggest it in the most subtle way. But, the truth was, it looked like both Hunter and Mrs. Roper had both figured out what Gretchen was trying to do. Even if Gretchen herself couldn't understand why she was even doing it in the first place. Wouldn't it be the most wonderful thing in the world to be with Hunter for the rest of the day. Alone. Talking.
And in that moment she realized, with a start, with a jolt of the awful truth, just what it was she didn't want.
She didn't want to talk.
Especially about the past. About why she'd had to leave.
And she was going to do anything she could to avoid that.
Mrs. Roper glanced out the window. "It's a beautiful morning. Nice day for sitting on the porch. Or for taking a stroll. You know. Like husbands and wives do all the time," she said.
"How does a stroll sound?" Hunter asked with a slight smile.
Gretchen glanced at the twins. "I don't want to stray too far from them," she said.
"We can stay on the porch then. That way we can hear any little cries for help. Isn't that right, Mrs. Roper?" Hunter said.
Mrs. Roper nodded and smiled. "If those little ones so much as make a peep, I'll let you know." She waved her hands at Gretchen and Hunter. "Now. Shoo. The pair of you. You look like you could both use some fresh air," she declared.
Hunter took a final swig of coffee and stood, extending a hand to Gretchen. "Would you like to join me on the porch?" he asked with a gentle, ever so charming smile. If only he knew how much she didn't want to join him on the porch. She was briefly glad that he seemed to have absolutely no idea just how much she wished he would finish his breakfast and ride away on his horse for the morning, leaving Gretchen with the twins and Mrs. Roper. Gretchen glanced up at her husband and saw the eagerness in his eyes, the simple delight written on his face. She suddenly felt awful about even wanting not to be with him. Gretchen forced a smile. "I'd be delighted, sir," she said with exaggerated, playful acceptance. She took his and and stood up.
Mrs. Roper smiled and placed her hands on her hips. "Well, ain't that a wonderful sight," she said with a sigh.
"You will let me know if the twins need anything, won't you?" Gretchen asked.
Mrs. Roper rolled her eyes. "What did I tell you two. Git," she ejaculated loudly, waving them both out of the kitchen.
Gretchen allowed Hunter to lead her out to the hallway. He held onto her hand with firm fingers. She could feel the strength of all the days of hard work. His fingers had been wrought into strong cords, but there was also a gentleness in the way that he held her hand.
Hunter opened the door and they stepped out. It was indeed a beautiful morning. The air was cool, the sun bright. Gretchen narrowed her eyes as she stepped out onto the porch. She looked across the yard. Men were already busy around the ranch. In the distance she saw some riders heading off, no doubt to tend to the herd. Far away the mountain peaks shone brightly in the early morning light.
Gretchen took in a deep cool breath. Hunter turned to her. "It's beautiful. Isn't it?" he asked.
Gretchen nodded. "Sure is."
Hunter tugged on her hand and she followed him to the long wooden bench that sat in front of the wide parlor window. He released her hand and wiped away some dust from the seat. Hunter gestured to the seat. "After you," he said courteously. Gretchen smiled at him and straightened her dress. She sat down and placed her hands in her lap. Hunter took his place next to her. Immediately he placed his arm on the back of the seat behind Gretchen. For a moment she thought he was going to wrap his arm around her and pull her close, but he didn't. However she was intensely aware of his arm at her back, even though he wasn't yet touching her.
Hunter sighed and looked across the plain at the distant mountains. "What a sight," he said. "I don't get to do this in the morning very much. It sure is nice to be here with you. Especially knowing that our twins are back there, inside the house," he said. There was a wide satisfied grin on his face.
Gretchen nodded. "It's lovely," she managed to say after a long pause.
Hunter glanced at her, apparently noticing the hesitation in her reply. Gretchen saw a flicker of curiosity in his eyes.
For a few long, and what seemed to Gretchen to be very awkward, minutes they gazed out across the view. A ranch hand wandered by and tipped his hat toward Hunter and Gretchen. No words were exchanged by the men and the
ranch hand went on his way.
Thoughts were tumbling about inside Gretchen's mind. What was she going to tell Hunter? It was inevitable he was going to ask her questions about where she had been in the past year. She knew he was probably going to demand answers. And she thought he had every right to ask those questions. She would do the same if she were in his position. But he simply had no idea how hard it was for her to break the promise she had made.
"What do you think of the place?" he asked suddenly, taking her by surprise. The tightness in her middle softened slightly when she heard his innocent, simple question.
"You mean the ranch?" she asked.
Hunter nodded.
"Looks like you've taken on some extra men. And there's that extra room you've been building," she said with a glance toward the end of the house.
"I needed the extra men. Got some more cattle. So I had to get a hold of some fresh hands," he said. He smiled at Gretchen. "I can't do everything by myself," he said with a quirk of his brow.
"Really? And here was me thinking you liked to be the one in charge of everything," she said teasing him.
Hunter slid closer to Gretchen. She felt the hand on the back of the bench gently touching the edge of her shoulder. At his touch she felt a tingle make it's way down her spine. Her breath caught slightly and she looked into his eyes. There was a sudden, intense interest in those eyes.
"I still like to think there are some things I'm in charge of," he murmured, his eyes penetrating her with a smouldering gaze.
Gretchen glanced down at her lap. Her throat felt suddenly tight and she was sure she could feel her heart thudding faster.
Hunter leaned in closer and she could smell his scent, a mixture of soap and leather. As it had done so often in the past, the aroma made her pulse quicken and, she was sure, the color of her face change.
This was all too fast, she thought. She'd barely returned home and she was already submitting to her husband's charms as if nothing had happened. As if she had simply been by his side for the past year, with no absence to act as a barrier between them. How could a man like Hunter be so forgiving? How could he simply just accept her return without harboring even the slightest suspicion, the slightest doubt?
Hunter's Montana Bride (Montana Ranchers and Brides #8) Page 6