When Paul reached home, he told his parents and family that he would be leaving with the rest.
"And thee will marry before thee goes then?" Father asked, taking up the child.
"I don't know yet whether I will or not." Paul answered.
"I'm sure Betsy thought thee would when she asked thee to take the baby," Amy put in.
"I don't know whether Betsy thought I'd marry. But the judge didn't seem to think she was lacking anything."
"That's because thy mother was here to help thee and thy sister," Andrew said. Elizabeth looked up at him, her blue eyes shining. She reached up a chubby hand to pull his beard.
"I think thee should either remain here with her or leave her here with us," Amy said firmly.
"I plan to do neither, Mother," Paul said just as firmly. "I am leaving Fair Hill so I can have a farm and I am taking my daughter with me."
"Then thee also should take a wife with thee," Amy said anger making her eyes flash green fire.
"I will not ask any woman to become my wife just because of a child. I should think thee would understand my not wanting to do that."
"I understand that thee needs a wife as much as this little one needs a mother, “Andrew said while his wife tried to calm herself.
"I am not fit to marry right now, Father, thee knows I'm struggling with many things now. Besides, there is no one I love as a man should love his wife."
"Thee could learn to love her later," Andrew began, not quite believing what he was saying. "I mean she could help thee sort out all thy uncertainties and give thee and the child a good home at the same time."
"Who does thee recommend for this task?" Paul was trying to remain calm but finding it difficult. "Does thee think I should go up to this likely woman and say something like this? I don't love thee, but I need thee to help me sort out my life and be a mother to my daughter. Will thee marry me?"
Andrew handed the child to Paul, struggling with his anger now. "I know thee can't say something like that. But every young woman in Fair Hill knows what thee has been through this past year and knows about Elizabeth. There is probably more than one who would gladly marry thee to help with raising her."
"I thought marriage was more than just raising children. I thought it was commitment between two people to each other."
"Thee knows what I'm saying," Andrew said. "Thee is being very stubborn about this, son."
"I am simply refusing to marry someone I don't love. Is that too unrealistic for thee? The life in Dakota will not be easy for any of us. Can I ask a woman whom I don't love, to leave Fair Hill for a soddy and someone else's child to raise? Father, thee isn't thinking clearly. I will take Elizabeth and raise her myself."
"Then thee never plans to marry?" Amy asked, now under control again.
"I will marry if God gives me a wife. But unless that happens, no."
"Then thee does believe there is a God these days? I remember when thee didn't think there was." Andrew said.
"Sometimes I think there might be, other times, I'm not sure."
"Does thee plan to tell that little one? That thee isn't sure?"
"I will take her to meeting every First Day and any other time there is worship there. I will raise her as a Friend. Lyddy and Mike will be there too, remember." His parents raised no further objections, knowing that it would be of no use to argue with him. Paul bought a wagon and a team. He put their things inside with some provisions for the trip. They would leave in three days. There were four other families going besides Elizabeth and Paul. There were the Hansens, the O'Connors, the Travises and the Meyers'. They would build a Meetinghouse on the edge of town and build their farms around it as they were in Fair Hill. Karl Meyers had been in touch with the land office in Mapleton already and knew where his store would be located. He and his family would live above the store until they could build another house. The Travises, John and Emily, were going to start a wheat farm as were the Hansens and the O'Connors. Paul also planned to grow wheat, the staple crop of the region. He had decided, if the land was good for grazing, he also would have sheep in a few years. Paul also planned to take some apple seeds and plant a few apple trees if they would grow out there. First, he would stake enough of a claim for a house and a field of wheat. This would give him a start toward the rest. Everyone else was planning to do the same.
The evening before they planned to leave, I went to him again just after supper. Paul was upstairs making sure that nothing they needed was being left behind.
"I see thy wagon is all ready to go," I said standing in the doorway of his room.
"Yes, I think everything is packed, finally." Paul answered, turning to face me.
"I could still go with thee," I said meeting his gaze and smiling. "I'm sure we could have a meeting for marriage beforehand. I know how thee feels about marrying. I've heard what thee said to thy parents. And thee is right. Thee can't just say those things to any woman. But I'm not just any woman. I knew Betsy a little and I know how thee felt about her. I also know thee pretty well and understand. I've been through the kind of grief thee is feeling right now. And thee helped me more than thee will ever know. Now I would like to give thee the same kind of help thee gave me." Paul crossed the room and took both my hands in his. I looked up at him, my feelings clearly written on my face.
"What about thy medical education?" He asked quietly. "I don't want to see thee give that up, Barbara. It's too important to thee."
"Thee is important to me too, Paul," I countered.
"Has thee talked to Doc about this?" Paul asked. "What does he say?"
“He says I should go with thee."
"Has thee discussed this with thy Uncle?" He wanted to know.
"Yes. He says he thinks it's a wonderful idea."
"Come and sit a minute. Let's talk." Paul suggested, drawing me to the chair. Paul seated himself near me and began. "I only have one reason for hesitating, Barbara. And that is a very important one. I'm very much afraid that in the years to come, thee will regret not having the chance to become a nurse. Then, thee will resent Elizabeth and me for keeping thee from this goal. I think it would be best if thee pursued this now and I went on without thee."
"What about what I think?" I asked "What about what I want to do?"
"I think that is what thee wants to do." Paul replied.
"Then thee thinks I'm just suggesting this because of Elizabeth?"
"I believe all that thee says, Barbara. And I appreciate thy feelings for me. But I don't want thee to wish thee had done differently."
"How can thee be so certain that I will feel like that?" I asked.
"I'm not saying I absolutely know what will happen. No one does. But the chance is there that thee will regret this decision. If thee remains here and finishes thy education, there will be no regrets. I think it would be best for thee."
"What about what is best for thee?" I asked rising.
"I don't know."
"But thee is sure that my idea is not best?"
"I'm not sure of anything, Barbara. That's why I can't make such a big decision for both of us."
"Then let me make the decision for both of us," I seated myself again, trying to remain calm and seem reasonable. This was my last chance to convince him to take me with him. I must not allow myself to become irrational. "I have thought about this and prayed about this a great deal, Paul," I began. "I have discussed it with thy mother and with Lyddy more than once. I have talked to my Uncle and Doc too. Thee is the only one who can't understand that I'm serious about this, that I think it's truly the best thing for us."
"I understand that thee is serious. I even agree that it would be a wonderful thing for Elizabeth and for me. But would it be the best thing for thee? There are a few things I've had to admit in the past few days. One is that it's going to be difficult to raise a child and start a farm without help. The other is that I love thee very much. His eyes were soft and warm as he said this and I could hardly believe either my ears or that he could expre
ss so much feeling in his face. I said nothing, fearing that if I did, he would stop. “There is nothing I'd like better than to marry thee and to take thee with me in the morning," he went on, taking my hand and holding it firmly in both of his. "But it isn't always best to follow our impulses, Barbara. I don't want thee to be unhappy, especially not on my account."
"But Paul, I'm telling thee I won't be. There'll be plenty for me to do out there. I might be the only person for miles with any medical knowledge. I can put what I have to good use." I still tried to seem calm but with him so near and his hands still holding mine, it was becoming more difficult.
"Now thee sounds like Doc," he said with a sigh of resignation. He told me then about his conversation with Doc a few days earlier.
"Then everything's already planned," I said when he had finished. "All we have to do is go out there. Doc can send the supplies to us in Mapleton."
"Thee thinks this is a good idea then?" he asked. "Thee thinks thee would be happy?" "Yes, I truly do, Paul. And besides, eventually there'll be a nursing school in Fargo, or somewhere close. I'll go then if I need to. But thee said Doc didn't feel I needed to. That has to mean something."
"Yes, Doc ought to know." he admitted.
I decided I had nothing to lose and pressed on. "And thee loves me. Thee said. So why should I not be with thee?"
"We might have to leave a few days later than the rest to marry first," he said hesitantly.
"We could gather quite a few people tonight. We could have a meeting for Marriage and I could be ready to go in the morning." I assured him. "Everyone else has already decided that I should go anyway."
He laughed a little and smiled. "Thee is right there. They probably have everything just waiting in case. “Let’s go talk to Mother and Father and see what they think," he added rising. I rose too and he drew me close for a kiss and hug. "I can't really believe this is happening," He added looking down at me, his love for me evident in his face.
I smiled back, feeling like the whole world was coming together at last. "I know how thee feels," I answered quietly. "But it is, and I think it's the happiest day of my life." We went downstairs together to find Amy and Andrew in the kitchen.
"Barbara and I would like to talk to thee," Paul said as we entered.
"Thee have come to an understanding?" Amy asked smiling at me wisely. "It's not too late yet if that's what's happened."
"Thee knew we would, didn't thee, Mother?" he asked.
"I hoped and prayed thee would. Only the Lord really knows these things." She answered. "But I'm very thankful thee has. What are thy plans then?"
"We want to be married tonight if it can be arranged and we'll leave in the morning with the rest," I replied.
"It's already arranged, just in case," Andrew said rising. "I'll ride over to the Hansens and start spreading the word. Meet me at the meetinghouse in an hour and a half and everyone will be there." I felt tears filling my eyes. These wonderful loving people had known all along how Paul and I felt about one another. They had everything ready.
Paul was beside me then, an arm about my shoulders. "Is thee all right?" he asked with concern.
"I'm fine. I just can't believe how well things are coming together."
"That's what happens when thee is in the will of the Lord," Amy said hugging us both and wiping tears. "I have a dress for thee, Barbara, let's go make sure it fits. Paul, thy clothes are ready too. They're in thy room upstairs."
In an hour and a half, we were entering the meetinghouse which was full of the people of Fair Hill. My Uncle Alan was there too, summoned by Doc to come quickly. We took our places and the meeting for marriage began. I stole a glance at Paul before I centered down. He looked a little nervous but wonderful as he too tried to center his thoughts. I wished my parents could be here to know this wonderful man I was about to marry. I was sure they would have liked him and it felt good to know that. Little Elizabeth slept quietly in Amy's lap as she sat beside me. In a few short minutes, this little girl would be my responsibility. Was I ready? I decided that with God's help, I would be. The elders spoke then, encouraging us and wishing us a long and happy life together. I knew I would always cherish those words from Molly O'Connor and Jared Johnson. I probably would not see these folks again in this life. There would be too much distance between Fair Hill and Mapleton. But they would always be a part of me and I would carry their love and their words with me. After a half hour had passed, Paul rose slowly from his place. He walked with certain steps to the facing bench where he turned to face the meeting. I rose too and went to stand with him. I felt more confident than I had since before the deaths of my parents. This was the right thing. I silently thanked God for helping Paul come to this decision. He took both my hands in his and spoke out of the stillness, his voice calm now and reassuring.
"I Paul Charles Becker take thee Barbara Leticia Scott to be my wife. Promising, with divine assistance, to be unto thee a loving and faithful husband for as long as we both shall live. The words came from my lips as easily and as joyfully as anything I had ever uttered. "I Barbara Leticia Scott, take thee, Paul Charles Becker to be my husband. Promising, with divine assistance, to be unto thee a loving and faithful wife as long as we both shall live." He slipped a simple gold band on my finger and I put the matching one on his hand. Andrew had given them to us as we left the farm. We then sealed our vows with a kiss and turned to sign the certificate. After we had signed it, Jared Johnson, the clerk of the meeting, took it up and read it to the assembled meeting. Then we were seated and the meeting resumed. The rest of the meeting was dreamlike. I was now married to Paul! The only man I had ever loved was now my husband. Somehow I knew that Betsy had hoped for this all along. I found myself hoping that Paul knew that too. Andrew was the one who broke meeting. He rose and shook our hands, wishing us well amid happy tears. Then everyone was gathering about us with hugs, kisses and kind words. They all signed the certificate which Jared then handed to us.
"I hope thee will have many years of happiness together out there," he said as he gave the paper to Paul and hugged us both. "Thee both are ministers and thy ministries will be sorely missed here. But the new community is blessed to have both of thee. Please let us know how thee are and we will continue to support thy medical work, Barbara. We are proud of both of thee." I thanked him for the support and for his words. This meeting had become a very important part of my life and I would miss it. But there were going to be friends about us. We would start another meeting. I hoped it would be as alive and vibrant as this one.
When we arrived back at the Becker farm, many folks had gathered for a celebration of the marriage. Uncle Alan was there too, and came quickly to greet us as we alighted from the buggy.
"This is such a fine thing," he said excitedly, hugging us both and laughing through happy tears. "I've never seen such a simple but beautiful marriage. It's a memorable thing to watch two people pledge themselves to one another with such simplicity and straightforward love."
"I do love her, Mr. Scott," Paul said earnestly. "And all her needs will be met. I know thee must wonder whether she'll be all right, going that far away. But she will be fine."
"I have no doubt of that, son," Uncle Alan assured my new husband. "I know you love her and that she loves you. The two of you will care for one another and everything will be fine. "I know you're father and mother would be very happy with this marriage, Barbara. Your happiness was their first concern."
"Yes, I think they would be glad, Uncle Alan. And I'm very glad thee brought me to Fair Hill."
"That was one of my better decisions, even if it was not what I would have wanted at the time." he admitted. "I've told your Aunt Sheila, by the way, and she says she expected it."
"Many people in Fair Hill expected it too," I said laughing a little. "I hoped for it but, after everything that's happened, I didn't expect it."
"So tomorrow you leave for Dakota territory?" Uncle Alan asked and there was real sadness in his voice.
&
nbsp; "Yes, but it's North Dakota now. They've gotten statehood recently," Paul put in. "Perhaps thee can come and visit us sometime," he added. "I don't want Barbara to lose touch with thee."
"That'll never happen, son, I'll keep in touch. Who knows, you might find me on your doorstep some day."
"I'd like that, Uncle Alan," I hugged him and kissed his cheek.
The old farmhouse was full of well wishers. Amy had made a cake that day. I hadn't seen it but it was there and there was a light meal for anyone who was hungry. Another table was piled high with gifts brought to us to start our new home. We looked at them and then at one another. Everyone had known this would happen.
"Sometimes The Lord just plans these things," Paul said gently. "We are very blessed."
"I'm glad some of these wonderful people are going with us," I replied shakily. "I'd hate to lose them." We cut the cake together then when all were eating and enjoying themselves, we opened the many gifts. Our home out west would be well prepared. Mike and the others helped Paul put everything in the wagon.
"I hope thee doesn't plan on taking a lot with thee," He said teasingly as they reentered. "It's pretty full already."
"I don't have a whole lot to take," I answered. "I think it's going to fit."
Around ten that evening, the folks departed, knowing that all those who were traveling would want an early start. I packed the rest of my things, keeping only what I would need the next morning and Andrew and Paul found room for them in the wagon. When I entered Paul's room upstairs, Elizabeth slept peacefully in her cradle near the bed. I readied myself for bed and was resting comfortably when Paul entered from helping his father. He placed his candle on the dresser and glanced at the sleeping baby.
The Secret of Fair Hill: A Refuge in Fair Hill Book 2 Page 16