by K. Renee
Reaching my hand out, I wait for her to come to me. She has a box on her desk and before she moves toward me, she walks to it and grabs it. When she finally reaches me, I take the box from her and it is somewhat empty. There isn’t much except a photo, a weird ass plant, a few pairs of heels, and a couple changes of clothes.
I take her hand and we make our way to the side exit. I won’t force her to do a walk of shame in this place, my hotel room? That’s a totally different thing. Sometimes I like to shame the women I’m fucking, but when it comes to shit like this, I don’t stand for it.
I knew that once he found out that I fucked her more than once, it was going to lead to this. Elias is a jealous little prick that thinks he deserves more than he does. He thinks that he can bed any woman, whether she wants him or not and it’s time he came down from that fucking perch he seems to be standing on.
We get to the curb and the door slams behind us, pulling my attention from her to Enver who is coming up behind us.
“I hope like hell he doesn’t out us because of this shit you pulled.” He’s pissed and I know what it means if Elias outs us. No one knows our real identities on the stage and we like to keep it that way. We hide our identities under masks for performances so we can live normal lives outside of it all, but I have a feeling that it will all change in a matter of hours.
Getting us a cab, I get Jericho in the middle seat and Enver and I get on both sides of her. I tell the driver our hotel and he takes off quickly. We sit in silence the whole way to the hotel and when we arrive, silence is still surrounding us.
I lead her to my room and Enver goes off to probably find the others. I’m sure he is going to tell those fuckers about what happened and I’m going to get bitched at, but I don’t care. I would do it again if I had the choice. Elias can go choke on a dick for all I care.
Getting Jericho in the comfort of my room, I set the box down by the door and wrap my arms around her. She doesn’t move and maybe it’s from the shock of it all or that she is just pissed as fuck at me now that she lost her job.
“What did your friend mean by Elias outing you?” Her voice trembles and when she looks up at me, I can’t help but frown.
I didn’t expect her to be paying attention to that, but I should have known better. If she heard all of what Elias said in the hallway, she would already know the answer to that question.
Running my hand over my face, I crack my neck before answering her.
“I will only tell you because I’m sure it’s going to be everywhere in a matter of days,” I sigh. “I am one-fourth of Arduous Murder, the metal band that I had you listen to last night.”
Her eyes widen and she puts her hand to her mouth.
“Oh my God.”
She turns so she is no longer facing me and I don’t know if it is a good thing or not. I reach out and put a hand on her shoulder, turning her to face me again.
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
Her choice of words surprises me, but then again I guess I should have expected it. Instead of saying anything, I pull up a picture from our website and show her. She snatches the phone from my hand and uses her fingers to zoom in on each of us.
“How do I know this is real? I can’t even see your face. You could just be lying about this to get back into my pants or something.” Before I can answer her, my hotel door is opened and the rest of the guys come into the room with angry expressions.
Jericho flinches and moves closer to me before looking back down at the picture and then back up at the rest of the guys.
“Is he lying?” she questions Enver.
He gives me a look of anger, but I shrug my shoulders. What did he want me to do, lie to her when she asked me point blank what he meant? I guess I could have told her I was a mob boss or something, but I like this girl. Something about her makes me want to tell her the truth and stash her away in my house back in Cape Cod, waiting for me to come back from tour.
When he doesn’t answer her, I turn to the guys and they all stare at me like I’ve gone insane. I’ve always been the one to insist we didn’t tell anyone who we were. Insisted that we were able to live normal lives when we weren’t onstage, and now I am the one ruining it all for a girl I just met.
“I’m a lot of things, but I don’t lie about this shit. We keep it a secret so we can still live normal lives.”
“Yeah, doesn’t look like that is going to last much longer,” Saint grumbles.
“Fuck you Saint.”
Her eyes widen at me calling Enver anything other than his real name.
“No fuck you, Trigger. We have busted our asses keeping that shit out of the media for a damn reason and now you are just fucking it all up for a piece of ass.”
He shakes his head and holds his hands up in the air before walking out of the room.
Chapter 17
Jericho
My head is spinning. There is no way that I am hearing them right. They can’t be rock stars, no fucking way. Surely he would be all over the news or whatever while he was in town if that was true. People would stop him in the street and ask for his autograph, and then I remember the phone in my hand. Looking down at the photo of the band, I can’t tell them apart. They are all wearing masks and all that are visible are their tattoos. I zoom in on the one on his neck and put my hand to my mouth.
He isn’t lying.
“I’ve known Wren a long time and he wouldn’t just let someone out us. Whatever spell you have his ass under, break it. I won’t let you ruin the band because you like the way he gives you his dick,” Dek says low enough that only I can hear him.
The other three are talking to each other, but Wren’s eyes are on me.
“Dek,” Wren growls. I’m sure he can see the look of horror or whatever it is I’m feeling written all over my face. I feel my bottom lip start to quiver and I decide on leaving. They are right. I don’t want to ruin their band. I’m nothing more than just a weekend for him and that’s it.
Instead of thinking, I just run, not stopping when he calls my name out. I hurry down the stairs and out into the casino until I blend in with the rest of the people in the place and find a door I can slip out of.
When I get in line for a taxi, I realize that I left my wallet in the hotel room and that I have no cash to get a cab with, so I start to walk. Maybe the walk will make me forget all about Wren or Trigger or whatever the hell his name is.
I want to forget I ever met him.
I lost my job because of him tonight and I don’t know what I’m going to do now. I guess I can always move and start over again. Ignoring the little voice inside my head that is telling me to go back to him and let him help me figure this shit out.
Who needs him anyway? I sure as hell don’t. I’ve started over before and I can do it again.
Instead of heading back to my apartment, I go to the diner around the corner from my place. At least here, I can eat pie until I explode and Jennie will put it on my tab and let me pay when I get some cash tomorrow. It’s a perk of being one of their regular customers.
Walking into the crappy diner that I love so much, I take a seat at the bar and Jennie comes right over to me.
“You look like crap, sweetheart,” she says with a look of concern.
I shrug and put my head down on the counter.
“It’s been the worst night of my life, no wait, I take that back. It’s the second worst night of my life.”
Her hand comes down on my head and she sighs.
“My child, I swear you can be so dramatic.”
I lift my head and she gives me a knowing look.
“I got fired tonight. The guy I was having a fling with just admitted that he had been lying to me which shouldn’t matter since he is leaving in a day or so, but it does. It hurts. And to top it off, he has my phone and my wallet.” Tears start to fall down my cheeks and Jennie hands me a napkin.
“Sweet girl, I don’t know why you always seem to get mixed up with these losers. I’ll bring
you pie and coffee on the house. I hate seeing you so upset, and you and I both know that pie cures everything.” She grins at me and pats my hand before walking off to go get my pie and coffee.
I spend the next three hours sitting here, eating my pie slowly because the thought of food makes me sick, but I can’t bring myself to waste it. Pie should be in its own food group.
When I finally peel myself off my seat and kiss Jennie goodbye, I make my way back to my apartment. As soon as I get there, I see Wren sitting on the ground in my doorway. He’s got his head leaned awkwardly against the door jamb and his eyes are closed.
Kicking the bottom of his foot, he jerks awake and I almost feel bad about doing it.
“Jericho.”
The second his voice hits my ears, I know that I’m done for. I don’t know what it is about him that makes me crazy, but he does.
“What are you doing here?” I ask, looking around to make sure his little asshole friends are nowhere in sight. I don’t think I can deal with them again tonight, or rather this morning.
“I came because you rushed out and left all your stuff in my room.” He motions to the box and I feel like an idiot.
Of course it had nothing to do with me, just the things I left behind.
“Well, thanks. You can leave now.”
I feel my heart break a little at that and I try not to let it show that it’s affecting me. I watch him stand up and I feel my heart start to pound in my chest. I don’t know if it is from seeing him here or because I’m sending him away.
“I get that you’re pissed, but let me explain.”
I just shake my head and look at the door behind him. When he gets ready to say something else, I just hold my hand up and stop him.
“Please don’t. I just want you to leave. Don’t come back.”
His head drops slightly before he nods his head and moves closer to me. His hands go to my waist and he pulls me in for one last kiss. I feel it all the way down to my toes, but I don’t let that change my mind.
His friends were right; I don’t want to be the reason for whatever problems they have in their band. I don’t want to be the reason that they can’t go anywhere in public without being mobbed by fans every second of the day.
As soon as the kiss ends, I wish I could just reach out and pull his mouth to mine again, but I don’t. I let him walk away because I know it’s the right thing to do. Grabbing my purse out of my box, I grab my keys and unlock the door, pushing the box inside with my foot and shutting the door behind me.
Closing my eyes, I lean against the door and take a deep breath. I just hope like hell that I am making the right decision.
-
Seven Months Later
Looking over at the bar, I sigh. I’ve been in this town for the last four months and part of me hates it. I thought that I could grow to love it, but I still haven’t.
It’s been six months since I last saw Wren and it’s been four since I got the last package from him. He’s sent me flowers, candy, and some trinkets since he’s been on tour but I’ve thrown it all out except one thing. He sent a small bear and band tee shirt from Arduous Murder in the last package and I kept that.
I turned the tee into a cute little onesie from a pattern I found online. A hand lands on my shoulder and I turn to look over my shoulder at my boss Mellie. She’s the exact opposite of Elias and I am so thankful that she gave me this opportunity when I got to town.
Just as she gets ready to say something, Arduous Murder’s brand new hit starts to blast through the speakers, reminding me of everything that happened seven months ago.
Falling head over heels in love with their lead guitarist in the matter of a two-day span was crazy, but possible I guess. Wren is never far from my mind especially when I feel a kick. He doesn’t know, and truth be told, I don’t even know how to contact him to tell him.
At first when I found out, I was getting the boxes and letters, but before I moved out here, I threw it all away except those two things I kept for the baby. The baby kicks all through the song like it knows that its daddy is the one playing on the radio.
“How you feeling, Jericho?” She gives me a bright smile before leaning back on the bar.
“Besides back pain, I’m good. Still have two months to go.”
She reaches out and rubs her hand along my stomach before grinning some more. She looks down at my feet and then shakes her head.
“You know if you would wear flats, I’m sure you wouldn’t be putting as much pressure on your back.”
I shrug my shoulders. “I’ve tried wearing flats and I just can’t do it. You know I love my heels.”
She laughs at that and pats my shoulder before walking off to the offices in the back.
I rub my hand over my belly and the baby kicks at it a few times before stopping. As the club starts to get busier, I make my way to my office to start working on the new liquor order. As I get halfway down the hall, a sharp pain radiates through my body and I have to lean against the wall to support myself.
Once it subsides, I continue making my way through the hall and into my office. Taking a seat behind my desk, I grab my water and chug it, hoping like hell that it helps keep the pain from coming back. I know that it’s a long shot, but you never know.
Before I can start working on the order, my office phone rings and when I answer it, the bartender Seth tells me that someone wants to see me on the floor. Telling him I’ll be right there, I sigh and go to stand back up, feeling that same sharp pain.
I wait it out until I am able to walk out there without the pain and when I get close to the bar, it’s like everything in my world has stopped. My heart drops into my stomach as I see Wren talking to Seth, laughing about something. Just as I’m about to turn around to hurry back into my office his eyes land on me and takes in my new body.
I know he doesn’t miss the fact that I’m pregnant; it’s kind of noticeable.
His eyes harden and he’s no longer in the joking mood. As he starts to make his way toward me, I put my hand on my stomach and hunch over in pain. His hands grip my arms and the pain gets so bad that my eyes start to water.
“Jericho, what’s wrong?” His voice is concerned now and the anger that was there is now gone.
“I don’t know,” I whimper as the pain gets worse. He motions to Seth and he leans forward and picks me up like I weigh nothing. He moves me to a barstool and as soon as he sets me down on it, I cry out in pain. People are starting to gather around us now and I hate being the center of attention. I just want to be back in my office where no one can see whatever is happening.
“Call 911,” he demands and I look up to see that Seth has a freaked out expression on his face.
He’s on the phone calling an ambulance and I grit my teeth as another wave of pain hits me.
“I’m right here. I won’t let anything happen to you, Jericho.”
Wren brushes hair out of my face and I grip his forearm, digging my nails into his skin.
“Please don’t leave,” I whimper.
Sending him away seven months ago was the biggest mistake of my life, but I lived with it because I knew it was best for him. Arduous Murder went on to win some big prestigious award three months later for their new album and if I stayed in his life, I’m sure Wren would have been more intrigued with me and the baby than his band. I couldn’t do that to him or his band.
“I won’t leave you, babe,” he whispers as he leans down to press his lips to my sweaty forehead.
Twenty minutes ago everything was fine and now, I don’t know what is going on. Pain hits me again and I can feel my body start to go cold.
“Something is seriously wrong.”
My eyes start to close and he tells me to talk to him and stay with him. He pinches my side and my eyes open again.
“Jericho, look at me. Stay with me.”
Commotion all around me gets louder and soon I’m being lifted off the barstool and laid on a stretcher with paramedics around me asking
all kinds of questions and whatnot that I can’t even comprehend.
My eyes start to close again and everything goes quiet.
Chapter 18
Wren
Seeing her again was the best and worst feeling all rolled into one. She’s fucking pregnant and never told me. Plus, the pain she was just in makes me want to take it all away. I don’t know what the fuck is happening, but we are now on the way to the hospital in an ambulance. They said something about having to do an emergency C-section, but I don’t know what any of that means.
“The baby is in distress and it’s taking its toll on her body as well. Are you the husband?”
I don’t think twice, I just say yes.
She can be pissed at me after all this shit is over and she’s on the mend. “How far along is she?”
I mentally count the months since Vegas and tell him, “Seven months.”
The guy starts doing a bunch of things and I just hold her hand. I don’t know what else to do but this. Grabbing my phone, I send a text to Enver and tell him that I’m going with Jericho to the hospital and that I’ll call him when I know more.
Three months ago, Seth called while we were on tour and told me that Jericho had shown up in Cape Cod. He said that she had gotten a job at the bar he bartended at on weekends and that he would keep an eye on her while we were still on tour. A few weeks later, he sent me a picture that showed off a baby bump or whatever it is people call it these days.
I was pissed that she never told me, but I knew she was trying to make a clean break by moving and not leaving a forwarding address. She didn’t want me to know, or maybe she didn’t think I would want a baby. I had come to the bar tonight to get answers. We were on break for the next few weeks from the tour and I just wanted to get the information I needed.
Once we get to the hospital, they unload her and rush her inside where I get stopped by the nurses as they wheel her behind a locked door. Running my hand through my hair, I try to calm myself down.