by Rachel Burns
I spent most of my afternoons in the music room practicing for my solo, or with the other girls who also had parts. I kind of thought of it as a gift for Daddy and Nanny.
We were making other gifts for our daddies.
I’d made myself very unpopular when I asked about making a gift for our nannies, too.
The other girls had all turned and given me a look that made me want to crawl in a hole.
I was making a handkerchief for Nanny, and I’d knitted a scarf for Daddy. It had taken forever, but the headmistress felt handmade gifts were the nicest, so every little girl had to make something for her Daddy.
My Christmas gifts were settled I had my part down for Christmas program. The only thing left to take care of was my monthly spanking. I was getting really nervous about it.
Daddy and I lay in bed the night before. We had just made love, and he had his arm wrapped around me. I started to cry. It was just so unfair.
“Are you okay, sweetheart?” he asked me.
I shook my head.
“Did I hurt you?”
I shook my head again.
“Tell Daddy what’s wrong.” He was using his soft doctor tone that always worked so well with me.
“I don’t want to be spanked tomorrow,” I admitted as I continued to cry.
“Amelia,” he said strictly. “The decision is mine and mine alone. I feel it’s necessary. I won’t let you influence my decision in any way. Do you understand?” he scolded me.
“Yes, but I’m so scared.”
He turned me so I was in his arms. He hugged me and held me. “I’m very sorry to hear that, but my decision stands. I believe this is for your best, and I will do it. No amount of tears or begging will sway me.”
“I’m not trying to change your mind. I’m just trying to talk to you about my problems.”
He laughed at that. “I’m not going to hurt you, sweetheart. I’m going to be very gentle with you even.”
I snorted at that thought.
“Amelia, do we need to start right now?” he warned me.
“No, Daddy,” I answered meekly.
The next morning I was on pins and needles. I was due to get my period in two days; I still couldn’t believe how openly that was discussed here. Today would be that day that I’d usually do something stupid, according to Daddy. I was surprised when we woke up at our usual time. I’d figured he’d spank me before school, before I could do anything – silly.
The morning had been very normal. He kissed me and left for work. Nanny packed me into the limousine, and we took off for school. I was being especially quiet, and I expected that Nanny would comment on it, but she didn’t.
I wondered if Daddy had told her about his plan. I thought the whole ordeal was very embarrassing. I didn’t want anyone to know.
I was perfectly behaved all day at school, which was easy because I didn’t have to go to class at all. We were practicing in the auditorium. All I had to do was sing, which I loved.
The headmistress came in and said she could hear me all the way to her office, which was the furthest point from this room.
I got praised all day, and I didn’t do anything silly.
After school, Nanny took me home to practice drawing. She liked that I was showing improvement in my control over the pencil.
I drew a couple of simple animals with my tongue hanging out of the side of my mouth.
I didn’t have any homework, which Nanny felt was so odd that she’d asked the teacher about it last week. I didn’t have any homework because I’d hardly been attending class.
The teacher explained to her that the Christmas program was going to be on a very high scale this year, and that because I was helping out the most, I didn’t have any homework. I was standing next to Nanny as the teacher explained this.
“Why is Amelia helping out more than other girls?” Nanny asked.
“Because she’s more capable.” The teacher smiled at Nanny to reassure her.
That had Nanny curious, who told Daddy and now both of them kept asking about it.
I simply told them that we aren’t allowed to tell.
Nanny took me down to supper. We were seated when Daddy came in.
I tried to smile at him, but I just couldn’t.
He sighed and slumped into his chair.
His butler brought out our supper.
Of course, we’d have my favorite today. No one knew which were my favorites and which weren’t. I ate everything all the same.
Not getting properly fed as a child made you less picky. I pushed my food around and hardly ate.
Daddy was eyeing my plate. “Amelia, I’m warning you.”
I took a tiny bite. I couldn’t eat more, because eating before a spanking wasn’t a good idea. His leg would be pressing into my stomach soon.
I took another bite of my fish. It was perfect. Maybe I should eat, and then throw up on him. I smiled at the thought a little and took another bite. It might make him reconsider.
“Amelia, finish up. We’ll wait.” He probably thought that I didn’t like supper, and that I was being sulky, but that wasn’t true. I was just trying to be practical.
I finished everything on my plate and decided to let the chips fall where they may.
Daddy looked surprised that I didn’t fuss, as he put it.
“Good evening, Nanny.” He stood up and reached out to me.
“Good night, Nanny.” I bravely got up and went to Daddy’s hand.
He led me up the stairs. He glanced at me a lot.
I thought that I was being very good.
Daddy opened the door to his room, and I gulped loudly as I walked in. He quickly closed the door behind us and locked it. He pulled me close to him and kissed me very passionately.
By the time he stopped, I was totally confused. I felt a tear roll down my cheek.
He traced it with his finger.
“I hate that you’re afraid of me.”
I dropped my eyes. I didn’t know how to answer that. I didn’t know what he wanted to hear. It was silent for a very long time.
He moved behind me and gently pushed my thick hair to the side so he could open my dress.
I suspected that they extra picked out dresses that I couldn’t open by myself.
Once he had it open, he let it fall to the floor so I could step out of it. This procedure was so familiar that it offered comfort.
I turned to him without being told so he could open the buttons on my blouse.
There was no begging or pleading. I wasn’t fighting him, but inside, I was screaming at the injustice of this all.
I also believed that he was punishing me for being older than he really wanted me to be. Because I had a period, and a good little girl shouldn’t.
In one moment, I trusted him and in the next he abused that trust. It was always hardest to accept my fate at times like this.
He had me undressed in the meantime.
I looked and saw that he’d removed my things and put them on the chair orderly.
“Amelia, come here.” He was already sitting on the bed. I moved over to him. He said this would be gentler, milder and not so harsh. I had to believe him that he wouldn’t hurt me. I believed without trust.
I didn’t have a choice.
I never really did and when I had, I’d chosen wrong and had always lost my right to choose thereafter.
That wasn’t true either. I hadn’t lost my rights. No, I’d given then away. I’d even promised them away in my wedding vows.
I’d been so young back then. I was full of pity for the me that I'd been only a few short months ago, so naïve. I’d had no idea what I was getting myself into.
I stood in front of him and awaited for further instruction like a robot.
“Come over my knee, sweetheart.”
Again like a robot, I did.
He pulled me in nice and close to him.
That was one thing I liked about his spankings. I never had a feeling like I was going to fall. I didn�
�t feel so alone.
I’d married him so I wouldn’t feel alone. I’d been tired of it.
Mostly, I wanted to avoid that feeling of being unwanted.
He’d wanted me.
That had been my only requirement. I’d hung the bar way too low.
The spanking started, but my thoughts roamed on.
Most of the other girls at school really liked my Daddy. We had all had to take a note home saying that he was coming to school to see if we had all of our vaccinations.
Some of the girls even had a crush on him. They thought that I’d made a really good catch.
I loved him, and still I didn’t think that. I felt I could have done better by myself on my own with no man by my side. Maybe that wasn’t true, but I sure would have liked to have tried.
He spanked on and on. He was really laying into me. It had probably upset him that I wasn’t paying attention anymore. I didn’t feel like it.
He stopped, and I wondered if he was finished.
My bottom was sore all over, even where it really hurt. I could have gotten out of the spanking without him knowing it.
I was starting to feel excited. I hoped I could use that trick more often. I just had to really think about something else, by really concentrating I could help myself in this hopeless situation.
He was rubbing my bottom and talking to me. He was saying that he wanted me to cry. His hand moved away from my bottom, and he slipped his fingers in between my legs. He slid a finger easily into me. He massaged me down there while I was over his knee.
He even let go of my hand. Keeping my hand out of dangers way was really important to him since I’d broken four fingers recently.
He spanked again but with his left hand so his right could ready me, as he called it.
It felt more intense than usual. My hand reached for him and attached onto his calf and held tightly.
His spanks got sharper. “I need you to cry Amelia. Just let go of the stress. I’m here for you. It’s okay. Daddy has you.” He was talking very softly in a way that could put me to sleep, but what he was doing with his hands was so – suspenseful that I wanted to see where it led to.
He continued to massage and spank. I was close, and I knew it, but then he stopped and spanked with his right hand again. Hard ones that brought sharp pain.
He stopped and massaged me again spanking with his left hand, which was strong, but not as strong as his right one. I was getting close again. He talked to me about crying again and releasing stress.
He stopped massaging me and spanked me hard again. My body arched up, like a bow, and I pushed my lower body against his leg looking for my much needed release.
He stopped and massaged me again. This time I climaxed the second he touched me. I cried out as I rocked myself against his fingers.
After the fog lifted, I bawled like a baby. I was totally ashamed of myself. I buried my face in the pillow.
I had another problem, too. I wasn’t finished. I wanted him.
No, this was past want; I needed him.
He pulled me to his chest. I clung to him like I always do.
He lifted my chin to look into my eyes. I don’t know what he saw there, but he turned me over on my hands and knees as he slipped out from under me. I could hear him opening his trousers.
I smiled to myself, knowing that he couldn’t see me.
He entered me swiftly, and I thought I’d climax immediately. He tried to pace himself I was sure, but I was panting Daddy over and over again. That always did it for him.
We both lay totally exhausted on the bed.
He held me in his arm with my head on his chest. “It wasn’t that bad was it. I don’t know about you, but I thought that was a lot better than the last two months. I can hardly wait for next month. That was just amazing.” He was proud of himself and even gloating.
I still wasn’t sure how I felt so I said nothing.
I had a month to think about it.
Chapter 8 – Christmas Pageant
Brian had to wonder what Amelia was up to at school. He and Nanny had been trying to get her to tell them what was going on, but, apparently, his wife could keep a secret.
Nanny had been whispering in his ear that she’d never had a little girl with so little homework. She’d talked to the teacher who told her that Amelia was helping out with the Christmas pageant.
Amelia had said something along those lines when she spoke with the psychiatrist. She’d wanted her parents to go to her school and visit her. Her mother couldn’t go because she’d died giving birth to Amelia. Her father wouldn’t go because he hated her, blaming her for her mother’s death.
Amelia had handed over an invitation to the Christmas pageant a month ago. Her hands were shaking, and she’d said that if he didn’t have time, she’d understand.
He told her that he’d love to come. He made sure that another doctor was on call so nothing could come up.
Amelia needed him to be there, and he’d show her that she could count on him. This would set the pattern for the rest of their lives.
Besides, this was the side of his life that he shared with his wife. This had all been his idea. His friends would there, and he could finally see what his wife had been up to. He was more curious than he cared to admit.
He loved being a part of her life.
***
“Daddy, turn around and cover your eyes.” I was giggling. I waited a few seconds. “Did you turn?” I asked him. I was hiding behind the door to my room.
“Yes, I did, sweetheart. You can come in.” I could hear that he was happy from his tone.
I walked in and shut the door behind me. I looked down at myself and smoothed my hands over my dress. I lifted my head high and smiled. “You can turn around now.”
He did, and he was still smiling. He smiled even bigger when he saw my dress.
I was beaming with pride as he came over to me and look me over. “You’ll be the cutest little girl there tonight. It looks better on you than I thought. It’s perfect. Absolutely adorable.” He looked at the puffed white sleeves with the teddy bear sewed into them on my blouse and the teddy bear on my dark blue velvet dress.
“Thank you so much for coming with tonight, Daddy. I know how busy you are and everything.”
He cut me off. “I wouldn’t miss a chance to show you off in this dress for the world. The other daddies will want the name of your seamstress, I bet.”
He hurried into his closet and got his shirt buttoned up and his tie in place. He sat down and slipped into his shoes.
Daddy came out and held his arm out to me. He looked so proud of me.
“You look so beautiful tonight.” He looked at me with an honesty in his eyes that couldn’t be doubted.
I blushed and looked down. “Thank you.”
“No, thank you for being my wife.” He stared at me as he knocked on Nanny’s door. I’d rarely seen him happier.
Nanny came out in an extra fancy uniform. She looked really proud too. “Good evening, sir,” she nodded at Daddy. Me she beamed at.
We walked down to the front door. Servants were waiting with our coats.
Daddy took mine from the servant and put it on me. It was dark blue wool with a teddy bear on the upper left chest area exactly like on my dress.
I wiped a tear out of my eye. “Thank you, Daddy.”
He was so pleased that I was happy.
His butler helped him into his coat, and a servant had helped Nanny.
Nanny badgered me in the car to tell them what my performance would be. Daddy was thrilled to be seeing the other daddies again. They justified his way of thinking, just as the school did.
“Nanny, I’m not trying to be mean. It’s just a secret for everyone. They’re doing something new this year. It’s supposed to be a surprise.” I had to stop before I revealed too much.
Our limousine had to wait in line for the others to drive into the school. Security was extra tight tonight.
“Daddy, don’t
expect much from my pictures. If you want, we can skip the art room altogether. That’s fine with me.”
Daddy turned his head away from me and smiled to himself.
The limousine parked in front of the door, and we got out. Daddy had his hand on my elbow the whole time he escorted us into the entryway. There was an area set up where we could leave our coats. I was sad to give up mine.
Daddy was still chuckling at me.
Nanny went off with a couple of other nannies. They went into the art room. I was going to embarrass Nanny with the crap I drew and painted.
The highlight was a pretty basket that I weaved. Basket weaving always saved my grade, plus I was really trying. Thankfully, that counted for something.
Daddy got a report of my grades at the beginning of the month every month per e-mail. A lot of girls got in trouble around that time. I usually got a present from Daddy.
He held my hand as he mingled with the other daddies. They were all older than my Daddy was. Daddy was the youngest by far. Most had gray hair even.
They all seemed to know him. My daddy was popular. Some thanked him for treating their little girls.
Daddy held onto me with his left hand and shook their hands with his right. I remained quiet at his side and traded smiles with the other little girls. The daddies all looked thrilled to be here.
My Daddy was talking to Rosalyn’s.
She wasn’t holding on to her Daddy’s hand. Her daddy was the least strict of them all.
Rose was wearing what looked like an elegant prom dress. She always looked older than the rest of us. Her daddy slipped a piece of candy into my hand. He was always doing that.
Rosalyn rolled her eyes.
“Thank you, sir.” I smiled at him.
“You’re welcome.” He smiled at me for a second and then turned back to my Daddy.
It always surprised me that the daddies all only seemed to be interested in their own little girls.
I’d heard from the other girls who had to go see my Daddy that he gave them lollipops from a glass jar high on a shelf. I’d never gotten a lollipop. I’d ask for one next time.