A Complicated Love (Complicated Love #1)

by D. M Midgley

  “Yes,” is all that he says. I start walking backward into my apartment with Joshua stalking toward me. The heat in his eyes is so overwhelming. He stops and kicks my door shut with his foot and proceeds toward me.

  Oh boy!

  Joshua rushes to me and wraps one hand in my hair and one hand around my waist, bringing me closer to him. His lips crash down onto mine. It’s a hard, bruising kiss which sends tingles all over my body from my head all the way to the tips of my toes. His lips are firm but tender, and oh my God is he a good kisser. My arms glide up his chest and wrap around his neck. I play with the ends of his hair, it’s so silky and soft to the touch. His hand around my waist moves down and squeezes my ass. I gasp and Joshua takes this opportunity to plunge his tongue into my mouth. I can’t help a small moan that escapes and it encourages Joshua even more. Our tongues are tangling and massaging together. Joshua brings his other hand down to my ass and squeezes it which causes me to moan again.

  “Where’s your bedroom, Annabelle,” Joshua asks in between kisses.

  “It’s the last door down the hall on the right.” Joshua picks me up while he’s still kissing me and heads to my bedroom. He puts me down on the bed and makes his way back to the door to shut it. He turns around and looks at me. His emerald green eyes are darker than I’ve ever seen them. I stand up slowly and take off my heels. I slowly lift my dress up and over my head revealing my black lace knickers. I went braless tonight so I’m now standing in front of Joshua in nothing but my knickers. He slowly walks toward me and stands right in front of me. He unbuttons his shirt and takes it off slowly in front of me. I admire his amazingly toned abs. I trace my finger over his abs and they tense beneath my fingers. Without breaking eye contact, he unbuttons his trousers and arousal floods me when he drops them to the floor along with his boxers. I can’t help but admire his manhood standing proud against his belly. I lick my lips and look into his eyes to see him smirking at me.

  “Like what you see, Annabelle?”

  I lick my lips again and his eyes are drawn straight to my lips. He starts breathing and panting heavily. Before I get a chance to reply, he crushes his mouth to mine and rips my knickers off. I’m so wet for him. I want him now. He picks me up and places me on the bed, laying over me. Our kisses become frenzied and I’m dying to have him fill me up completely. He caresses my breast with his right hand. He skims my nipples and they instantly harden. Joshua kisses me on the neck, making me whimper with want. He kisses a trail down my throat, and then over the slope of my breasts. He takes extra time on my nipples. He licks and sucks until I’m moaning and panting with want.

  “Oh… Joshua!” I feel this sensation building in the pit of my stomach and spreading all throughout my body. He’s working me up to my impending explosion. While Joshua takes care satisfying my breasts, his right hand travels down to my thighs and caresses them slowly up and down. I can’t take much more.

  “Joshua… please… I want you inside me.”

  He growls and parts my legs to place his body in between them. He grinds his hips into mine and I can feel the tip of his manhood right at my entrance. With one hard thrust, Joshua fills me and we both groan in unison. He slowly pulls out and thrusts back in again. We’re both on the brink and I can’t get enough. He crushes his lips back on mine. Hard, punishing kisses that have me moaning and panting. His thrusts start to get faster. Joshua is losing control and every time he thrusts in hard, he’s hitting my special spot. My nails dig into his shoulders as I scream with my pending orgasm.

  Joshua doesn’t let up and I know he’s close. We’re both lost in the throes of sexual bliss and I don’t want it to end. I scream Joshua’s name when my orgasm hits. I don’t want to brag, but I’m seeing stars. Joshua grunts and buries his face in my neck as he comes hard and fast inside me, filling me up with his cum. We lie there for a while, panting heavily. Joshua slowly pulls out and staggers to my en-suite bathroom. I lay there, drowning in the sexual high. Joshua appears with a wet flannel and I continue to lay there while he cleans me. Joshua won’t look at me, and I’m becoming a bit insecure. He collects his clothes and dresses quickly. I cover myself with the sheet while I watch him getting dressed.

  “Joshua, are you okay?” I ask, feeling concerned that he seems reserved.

  “Yea, I’m fine. It’s just, I… I should go,” he doesn’t look at me when he says it. He’s now standing in my bedroom, dressed and looking uncomfortable. I feel ashamed that I let this happen and with my new boss, but I also can’t help but feel confused.

  Why is he being like this?

  “I think it’s best if we just forget about this and leave it as a mistake. You’re my employee and this is unprofessional. It shouldn’t have happened.” He finally looks at me and I see sadness in his eyes.

  I plaster on a fake smile. “You’re right, it was a mistake and I’m sorry we got carried away.”

  “I’m sorry too… Look, I’ll see you on Monday. I have to go.” He leaves my bedroom and a few seconds later, I hear the front door click shut.

  What have I done? How can I possibly face him on Monday?

  I get up and have a shower to wash away the events of the evening, get dressed in my nightie and curl up in bed. I can’t stop thinking about his touch, his kisses, his caress of my body.

  If it was a mistake, why did it feel so good?

  I have to stop thinking of my boss that way… I have too. In frustration, I turn over and force sleep upon myself. I will worry about Joshua and everything that happened on Monday. I hope the rest of the weekend is uneventful.

  The weekend went by fairly quietly. Tracy dragged me into town on Saturday to buy a new outfit for my first day at work. We walked up and down Oxford Street until I couldn’t feel my feet anymore. I settled on a navy pencil skirt which sits just above my knees, a plain white blouse and a navy suit jacket to match. I finished the outfit off with a pair of black open toe heels. Tracy wouldn’t let me pay for it, she insisted on buying it for me as a ‘congratulations on your new job’ present.

  We ate lunch at a little café on Oxford Street and Tracy kept me entertained with her tales of Friday night. She asked about what happened between Joshua and me, but I lied and told her that nothing had happened. I told her that he dropped me off and left.

  I can’t tell her what really happened.

  In some ways, I’m angry at Joshua. The way he behaved afterward was horrible and made me feel cheap. It was just a one night stand, plain and simple.

  I have to suck it up and walk into Lynn Publishing with my head held high, and this is what I’m telling myself as I stand in front of the most amazing building. I’m sweating already and it’s bitterly cold outside. I take a deep breath and tell myself that I can do this. I can see him again.

  “Get a grip Annabelle,” I tell myself. “You can do this.” I walk through the revolving door and head toward the lift. I press the up button and wait. The lift seems to be taking forever to arrive and finally when the doors open, I get in and press button 12 for the twelfth floor. I’m the only one in the lift and each floor that goes past, my breathing gets shallower. My palms are sweaty, and I feel like I’m going to faint. The lift stops and the doors open. I walk down the hall to the waiting room where I waited for my interview. Wendy is there as I approach the door.

  “Good morning dear, all ready to start work?” She gives me an encouraging smile.

  “Yep, I’m looking forward to it. Can’t wait to get started.” I smile so wide I must look crazy. I’m trying to play it cool here!

  “Well then, follow me and I’ll show you where my office is located and where yours will be once I retire.” She walks off down the hall. I can see the double doors at the end of the hall. I wonder if Joshua is here yet? I become incredibly nervous and blow out a heavy breath. Wendy stops outside a door on the right of the double doors. She opens the mahogany door and walks in. The room is quite boxy, small with a tiny desk and chair in the middle and a long line of filing cabinets that h
ug the wall down one side of the room. The walls are covered with corkboards and loads of notes are posted all over them. It’s a complete mess. How can Wendy work in here?

  “This will be your office when I finally retire. There’s always filing that needs doing. This pile here on the desk is where the filing is kept. If Mr. Lynn needs you for anything, he will contact you on the intercom. In the mornings, the first thing I do is go down to the coffee room, which is located to the left by the lifts, to make Mr. Lynn his coffee. He likes it strong and black with two sugars. Mr. Lynn is always in before 9:00 a.m. so always make it when you get in. Just knock on his door until he tells you to come in. He doesn’t allow us to just enter his office. Any questions?”

  I smile. “No, I’m good… seems straightforward.”

  “Okay, well I’ll go and make Mr. Lynn’s coffee today while you get settled and familiarize yourself.” Wendy shuffles past me and walks down the hall. I pop my jacket and bag on the coat stand in the corner and take a seat behind the desk. There’s a laptop on the desk with Lynn Publishing’s logo on it. It looks too fancy for this office. I pick up the files and start organizing them in alphabetical order, before placing them in the appropriate location in the filing cabinets. A buzzing noise starts coming from the intercom. I look over and see a red light flashing, so I press it.

  “Wendy… are you there?” Joshua’s husky voice comes over the intercom.

  “Um… sorry, Mr. Lynn, but Wendy is… um, down the hall making coffee.” My throat goes dry and I can’t breathe. There’s silence on his end for a long time until I hear him sigh. “Okay Miss Connor… could you please bring me the O’Malley file, please?”

  I take a deep breath. “Certainly Mr. Lynn. I will get you it right away.” I release the button and rummage through the filing cabinets until I find the O’Malley file. On wobbly legs, I walk out of the office and knock on the double mahogany doors.

  “Come in.”

  I take a deep breath before pushing the door open and walking into Joshua’s office. I wasn’t ready for this. He’s in his seat behind his desk typing away on his laptop. He doesn’t look up and I’m not sure what to do. I stand there and watch him for a few seconds. He looks really good. He’s in another suit, which makes him look sinfully sexy and his hair is gelled and slicked back. His smooth, silky, hair… I would give anything to run my hands through it again. His deep emerald eyes that sparkle when he smiles, his touch that’s feels so good on my skin…

  “Are you going to just stand there or come here and give me the file I requested?”

  I’m shocked out of my daydreaming by his clipped tone. He’s looking at me with a stony expression and a hard stare in his eyes. His kind emerald eyes are no more, but in place are these hard, cold eyes.

  “Yes, certainly Mr. Lynn… sorry.” I walk across and place the file on his desk while he scrutinizes my every move. I can’t take the way he’s looking at me. Without waiting for further instruction, I turn around and walk quickly out of the room. After I shut the door, I lean against it, trying to regulate my breathing.

  Well, at least I know how much he regrets it.

  Why is he being like that?

  Where were his gentle, kind eyes and his adorable smirk? My vision begins to blur, but I don’t want to cry, so I try to compose myself before going back into the office. I proceed back to my office and start the filing again. I see Wendy go past the window with Joshua’s coffee. She stops in the doorway.

  “How you getting on, Annabelle?”

  I plaster on a smile. “Oh fine, I’m just filing these.” I lift up the files to show her. “Okay, I’ll be back in two secs.” And she heads off to Joshua’s office.

  The rest of the day is spent with me doing loads of filing and Wendy showed me how to book appointments and meetings on the laptop. She then took me through to the conference room to help me learn how to set up for when a meeting is being held here. I will have to be in some of the meetings to take notes, which I will then have to type up on the laptop, ask Mr. Lynn to check and then file away. The job seems pretty good and I’m enjoying myself so far. Wendy is lovely and helps me out a lot, especially with the laptop. I don’t see Mr. Lynn for the rest of the day. Wendy’s been dealing with his requests. It can’t always be like this, but I’m hoping it will get better.

  I arrive home to all the lights out, so I turn them on and make my way into the kitchen for a cup of coffee. I take the coffee into my bedroom, take off my heels and clothes and jump in the shower. The warm spray is beautiful on my tired body. I could stay in here all day. I change into my nightie and get in bed. I start to sip my coffee while reading my latest book on my Kindle, ‘Pride and Prejudice.’ I don’t get very far in, when my eyelids grow heavy. I place my coffee and Kindle on my bedside table and curl up in my bed.

  I’m so tired. I fall into a deep sleep.

  I’m really enjoying my job. Wendy is fantastic to me and has taught me so much in the last three weeks. I’m getting pretty good at using the laptop. Go me! Everyone I’ve met has been really nice. I’ve been to a few meetings where I’ve taken notes and, so far so good. I have managed to type up my notes as well with no problems. So well, that Joshua hasn’t had cause to complain.

  Joshua is still a sore subject. We haven’t spoken that much since I started working here. I don’t know what I expected, but it sure wasn’t this. I see him sometimes glancing at me when he thinks I’m not looking. I can’t help looking, and I can’t help thinking about him. I don’t understand how I can have such a strong attraction for a man that I slept with once and he made me feel so ashamed. I don’t even know anything about him. We are practically strangers, but I can’t help the way I feel. I want to know him. I want to see him smile at me again instead of this hard, cold look he presents me with whenever we are in close proximity. I thought it would get better, but unfortunately it doesn’t seem to be at all.

  This is the last day of the week before the office closes for the two week Christmas break and Wendy’s last day. I’m going to miss her. She’s been a lovely friend and colleague. I make it into the office ten minutes before 9:00 a.m. Wendy’s already in the office and she’s sitting at her desk, typing.

  “Hi Wendy, it’s freezing out there today. I can’t believe this is your last day. I’m going to miss you.” I frown, thinking that Wendy has made this job fun and a part of me is nervous about being Joshua’s only PA after today.

  “I’m going to miss you too, and all my friends. I’ve worked here for thirty years even when Mr. Lynn’s father was my boss.”

  “Wait… Mr. Lynn’s father used to work here?” I’m intrigued by this information.

  Wendy continues typing her document. “Yea, Mr. Lynn replaced his father when he had a terrible accident that left him in a coma. I don’t remember a lot about the accident, but I do know that he never regained consciousness. Mr. Lynn took over the company about eight years ago and has been doing a wonderful job. He’s just like his dad. It was such a traumatic time for the family. Mr. Lynn’s mother wasn’t coping very well, and it took a while for her to continue forward.”

  It seems Joshua has been through some traumatic stuff. Maybe this is why he doesn’t want a relationship happening in his workplace? He has taken over his dad’s company and obviously has continued building a great business. Since Wendy seems talkative, I plough forward hoping to find out more about Joshua.

  “Does Jos-Mr. Lynn have any siblings?” Nearly slipped up there, but I smile and hope she doesn’t realise. “Yea, he has a younger sister, Danielle. She’s at Oxford University studying Art. She’s hoping to have her paintings up in the art museums eventually here in London. She really is very talented.” Wendy giggles. “I’m sure she will do it. She’s a very determined young lady.” She giggles again. “Well, I’m going to head to the coffee room and get a coffee. Do you want anything, Annabelle?” She finishes up on the laptop and straightens her desk.

  “No, thank you. I might just start this filing that needs d
oing.” I collect the files from the desk and start work.

  I hear the intercom buzz. “Hi Mr. Lynn, how can I help?” I say in the happiest voice I can muster.

  “Miss Connor, I have a meeting this morning at 11.30 a.m. so I need the meeting room set up for twelve people, please?

  “Not a problem Mr. Lynn, I’ll get on it right away.” I walk to the meeting room and begin to set it up for the meeting. Joshua seems in a good mood today. I always dread a meeting because Joshua uses every means necessary not to look or even acknowledge me, so maybe this meeting won’t be so bad since he’s in a good mood. I make sure the tea and coffee trolley is stocked and ensure that every space has a notepad and pen ready for each individual. Five minutes later and I sit back in my seat at the back of the room as twelve smartly dressed men and women come in through the meeting room door. Not long after they have all taken a seat, Joshua walks in.

  Every time he walks into a room, I can’t help but stare. He’s gorgeous and he’s wearing another one of his fabulous suits, this one is navy. While Joshua performs his welcome speech, I push the trolley around and take everyone’s order for tea or coffee. I make my way around and when Joshua has finished, everyone talks amongst themselves.

  “Mr. Lynn, would you like coffee?”

  Joshua looks up at me. “Yes please, you know how I like it.” He smiles a real smile. I think my knickers have just melted. I make his coffee and hand it to him. His fingers gently brush mine when I hand him the mug. There’s an electric spark between us that I feel flowing through me. His eyes are alight with want and desire, and I just want to lean forward and brush my lips against his. Before I know it, he pulls away and the moment has gone. I sit back down in my seat. My skin is on fire with one simple touch. I know my face is bright red, so I keep my head down and take notes for the rest of the meeting.