“And so, I’ve been alone. Isolated and just so very afraid. I’m not the same me anymore. I’m not.”
She stopped speaking and let her tears fall, unable to go on. She’d confessed the stark truth that was her life now, and Emily wondered if they’d think her too weak, too much a coward. Not the strong person she had always been. And most certainly not the person they’d fallen in love with.
Noah pulled her away from Gabriel and enfolded her in his strong arms. He closed his eyes against the sting of his own tears and clenched his jaw. This was gutting him, and he didn’t know how to make her feel more secure. If he’d only known she was living through this hell, Noah thought, he would never have been away from her, never left Emily to fend off the demon alone.
He felt Gabriel’s hand brush against his arm, and he reopened his eyes to see that Gabe had moved closer and was caressing her back as she cried between them. Gabriel’s eyes looked just as tormented as he knew his did, and Noah stared at him unblinking as he tried to collect his enraged thoughts. It was the last thing Emily needed – their anger - no matter that it wasn’t directed at her. No, she needed reassurance and security. Two things she’d been sorely lacking for too damn long now.
“Emily, open your eyes and look at us,” Noah urged her. He pulled her away from his chest just as Gabriel settled a hand on her shoulder and rolled her onto her back. Both men rested on their elbows so they could see her clearly and she could see them.
Emily resisted opening her eyes initially, but after a few tense seconds she acquiesced. She swiped angrily at her face, but Gabriel caught her fingers and brought them up to his lips. He held on, not releasing her. He simply lowered their conjoined hands to her chest while Noah brushed her hair back again and again. Slow, sweeping motions to calm and soothe her.
“Em,” Gabriel began, but broke off to swallow back his anger that was still simmering just under the surface. “We do know you, better than anyone else. So of course we noticed the change in you right away. We can see how exhausted you are from the toll this has taken. We could see while we were in your home how withdrawn you’ve become. And we understand why, honey. We do. If I’d had someone stalking me for weeks on end, I’d probably be exhibiting some of the same traits too.”
“No you wouldn’t,” she quickly countered. Emily shook her head in both anger and disgust. Disgust at herself and the fact that they were seeing her stripped bare in such a way.
Gabriel’s eyes ignited with a ferocity that would have made most grown men take a good step back; but Emily shook her head vehemently, not put off or intimated by him in the least.
“Don’t look at me like that,” she fussed and blew out a frustrated breath. “You know you wouldn’t have hidden inside your house. You would have gone on about your daily life and you would’ve given the stalker the middle finger, daring them to take a picture of that. How can you want me now? I’m not the woman you left behind when you went on your last case. That’s the Emily you knew and loved. Not me. Not some damn coward.”
Emily began to push herself out of their hold, but Gabriel and Noah blocked her escape. They loomed over her and gave her no route to flee the bed or them. Gabriel’s jaw flexed and Noah knew he was fighting a war within to keep his tongue and temper in check.
“Now you listen to me,” Gabriel said in a low voice. She turned her head away, but Gabe cupped her chin and directed her eyes back to his. “Don’t you turn away from me, Emily. You will not call yourself a coward. This is not your damn fault, and I won’t let you think that or tear yourself down with such lies.”
“You are the victim here, no matter what you wanted or wished. This stalker came into your life, into your sanctuary, and made it his or her own. Noah and I’ve seen enough victims in our line of work to tell you that what you’ve dealt with is normal and to be expected under such horrific circumstances. You’ve done nothing wrong, Em, and we won’t let you think for one damn second that you have.”
“Listen to him, Emily,” Noah said, his tone grave and utterly serious. “In my mind, you’ve done everything right. You called the sheriff’s office right away and reported it. You took steps to keep the perp from seeing in. You purchased extra security and started carrying your granddad’s pistol, so you could better defend yourself. And you made sure everyone who meant something to you was safe. How can any of that be wrong, baby? You’re pretty damn courageous in my mind, and Gabe’s right – we’ve seen enough of this shit to have an educated opinion.”
“You are still our Emily.” Gabriel nodded and watched her eyes carefully. “Brave and tenacious – hell yeah. You left home, as Noah said, to protect us and Tara. We know you did it for that reason, honey. You stayed off grid and left the piece of trash far behind.”
“And no matter what pictures this freak has snapped, your core, your heart has not been captured or damaged,” Gabe said and raised her hand still held in his back to his lips. “And we can say that, because we felt your heart open wide for us last night and this morning. All that goodness and love within you is still there. You are still our Emily. And that, sweet girl, is the truth. The only truth that matters and the only one you need to believe in. You’re still you, and the stalker hasn’t won.”
Emily nodded as she shook from the force of her newest tears. Gabriel leaned down and kissed her forehead and then her cheek. Noah moved in to claim her other, and together they wrapped Emily in love and warmth.
“We’ve got you, Em,” Noah murmured against her ear. “Don’t you ever doubt it.”
“I’m sorry for taking it out on the two of you,” she managed to say, though the words were difficult to get out. Her infernal pride had taken quite a beating lately, and of all times, it wanted to rear its ugly head now. Emily fought hard to tamp it back, and take the branch the guys were extending to pull her out of the murky waters she’d been swimming in.
“I’m just sick of feeling like a weaker version of myself,” Emily confessed. “I’m so angry and I want to fight back. I just don’t know how, because I don’t know who’s doing this to me.”
“That’s good,” Gabriel said and rose back up on his elbow. “Get mad and fight. We may not yet know who it is, but you can fight the war within you and not give this perp another inch. Keep the walls within built high, and protect your integrity and heart from further injury or insult. They can only tear you down as much as you let them.”
“Then help me fight,” she implored him. “Help me get this maniac, so I can live again. So we can live, the three of us, in safety. I want you guys to be happy that you’re with me, and not feel like I’m another job or a burden. I’d never wish that for you.”
“How can you say you’re not the same Emily?” Noah chuckled, surprising her. “There you go, worrying about us before yourself, just as you always have. Sweet and caring as always. And let me add,” he grumbled as he shifted and threw a leg over hers, “that you are not some damn job.”
“Baby, you’re everything to us. You gave us your virginity last night. You gave me the best blowjob a man has ever had, and Gabe would probably tell you the same. And this morning, you absolutely rocked my world when you got between us and trusted us to take you where you wanted to go. We don’t make love to those we meet on the job. In fact, I can honestly say, that I’ve never made love before last night. I might have had sex, but I’ve only made love to you.”
“Same goes here,” Gabriel rumbled. “And you’re also not a burden, Emily. We take care of our own. That’s what family does, you know that. You’re ours and as of last night we’ve staked our claim. We’ve drawn the line in the proverbial sand, and we’re not regressing, only moving forward from now on with you at the center. So don’t think to back away from us now. No, honey, we’re staying right by your side.”
“Or on top of you,” Noah grinned and lifted himself over Emily, settling his cock at her pussy’s entrance. Gabe moved back a space as Noah planted his palms on either side of her head.
“Or inside you
,” Noah winked and slowly began to penetrate her. “God! I cannot get over how tight you are,” he groaned and then leaned down to match his lips to hers.
He pulled back slowly and then filled her one delicious inch after another. When he was fully seated within her, Noah tilted his hips forward and Emily cried out, shocked at the depth he had achieved. It felt as though he was touching her womb, completely filling her. Not just her sheath, but her heart and soul too.
“Put your legs around me, Emily, and let’s get lost in each other for a little while,” he encouraged her. Noah ran a hand down her side and lifted one of her legs, helping her move into position.
She nodded and then wrapped her legs around his waist. Higher on his body than she had the night before, and Emily felt the immediate difference. They clutched at each other, desperate to get closer as Noah began a slow glide in and out, going to the hilt with each thrust.
“Don’t stop,” she breathed.
“Never,” he vowed. “I will never get enough of you.”
He rocked forward with more momentum and Emily cupped his face, pulling Noah down for a drugging kiss that had them both panting for air. She wanted to take everything he had to offer and give her all in return.
Faster he moved, until the bed sounded its protest, but he didn’t relent. Instead, he fused his lips to hers and continued to crash into her until they both shattered. Noah shouted her name, cradling her close to his heart, as he twitched and quaked through the tremors of his release. It seemed that several minutes passed before he remembered to breathe again, and Noah finally managed to lift himself up enough to see Emily.
He was worried momentarily that he’d hurt her by throwing caution to the wind and taking her without restraint. But Emily began to smile slowly and Noah couldn’t help but smile back. Her skin was flushed and damp with perspiration. Her luminous, golden hair was in a riot, and she glowed like a woman who had enjoyed everything her man offered her. And, Noah thought proudly, he’d been that man.
“You look like you enjoyed that,” he chuckled and gave Emily a leisurely kiss before he let her answer him.
“So do you.” Emily ran her fingers through his damp hair and smiled, watching the utter contentment in Noah’s green eyes. “That was amazing,” she murmured.
“Only with you, baby,” he said sincerely.
Emily looked to her right and realized that Gabriel was no longer with them. She’d been so lost in the moment with Noah, that she hadn’t even realized he had slipped out of the bed. She glanced back at Noah, and he grinned and nuzzled her jaw with his nose.
“He headed for the shower a while ago. I’d guess he’s making breakfast for us right about now. Do you want to get cleaned up and eat, or just stay here in bed? Totally your call.”
“I want both,” she said and shrugged helplessly.
“Well… That might be a bit difficult to achieve.”
“I know. I’m just playing.”
“And I’m glad you are,” Noah said, staring intently now into her eyes. “If making love to you takes it all away, sets you free as you said earlier, then Gabriel and I will make sure you aren’t left wanting. We’ll take great care with you, but we’ll also make sure you know that you’ve got us in every way a woman can have a man. Heart, mind, body, and soul.”
Emily felt her breathing come to a standstill. Noah’s words struck a chord deep within her heart that she had willfully ignored for years. She’d always hoped that their friendship would be enough to see her through. Enough of a substitute for what she really wanted. Enough to dull the ache of her wish for something more. Now, they were offering her everything she’d ever dreamed of, and the change in their relationship was staggering to say the least.
“Em?” Noah whispered, bringing her back to the moment and to him.
“You’re talking forever, Noah,” Emily managed to say. She cupped his cheek and swept her fingertips over his stubbled skin. “Was that a proposal?”
He smiled ruefully at her and leaned in to run his nose along her jaw. “Gabriel and I have plans for how we want to do that,” he admitted and lifted his head to look into her eyes. “But I think we already made that pledge last night. Don’t you?”
Emily noticed the immediate shift in his tone and the vulnerability that shone clearly in Noah’s eyes. She realized he was just as afraid of losing her as she was of losing them, and she sought to reassure both Noah and herself that this burgeoning relationship was possible. That they wouldn’t slip away from one another. Not now, not ever.
“Yes, Noah, we did.” Emily nodded and threaded her fingers back through his thick hair. “I’ve never committed to anyone but the two of you. And I never will again.”
She felt his cock twitch within her pussy as it began to come back to life and she arched an eyebrow at him in surprise.
“Don’t look at me like that,” Noah chuckled. “I’m not quite thirty yet, and you’ve unleashed the hounds, Em. Every time I think about how new this is for you, or how Gabe and I’ll be the only two to ever have you intimately, I get hard all over again. I’m trying to behave, but it’s a struggle, believe me. I’ve fantasized about you for years, but the reality is so much better.”
“Your incorrigible,” she admonished him and giggled as she looked away.
“No, I want you to encourage me. Often. All the time,” he played and waggled his eyebrows. “Day and night. I’ve got lots of fantasies about you that we can have fun with.”
“Well, Mr. Johnston, I happen to have lots about you and Gabriel as well,” Emily retorted. She relaxed and fell into the easy banter that had always been there between them. Only now it was uninhibited and she loved the freedom in it. Never would she guard her words around him or Gabe again.
“Can’t wait,” Noah growled. He gave her a quick kiss, and then he eased from her body. He lifted her in his arms and headed for the bathroom, not willing to let her out of his sight or out of his arms until he was good and ready.
CHAPTER 13
The smell of bacon and sausage had Emily sniffing the air appreciatively as she and Noah entered the cabin’s main living area hand in hand. Gabriel looked up from the stove as they approached, his smile relaxed and untroubled as she moved to his side. Any worries Emily might have harbored about their ability to share her evaporated when Gabe dropped a kiss on top of her head in greeting.
“Hmmm, you smell good,” he said and then kissed her temple.
“It’s just a little thing I like to call shampoo,” she played.
Gabriel swatted her butt and she yelped. “Smartass,” he grumbled, but he was still smiling as she moved away from him and headed for the coffee he’d brewed.
She poured herself a mug and then one for Noah. He kissed her lips in thanks, pinning her against the counter while he leisurely explored her mouth with his tongue.
“All right now,” Gabriel grumbled. “Ease up or you’ll be eating alone, Noah. Too much more of this and I’m taking her back to bed.”
Noah chuckled and lifted his head, winking at Emily as he braced his arms on either side of her. “Shall I give him a break, Em? Or just keep going?”
“Let’s take a break,” she laughed. “I am a little sore now.”
Noah’s face grew serious within a heartbeat and he lifted a hand to cup her face. “Just how tender are you? Did I hurt you earlier?”
“No, you didn’t hurt me,” she reassured him. Emily lifted her hand to caress his cheek and Noah leaned into her palm. “This is all new for me, and my body just needs a little time to recover. That’s all.”
“We’ll take it easy today. I promise.” Noah nodded and kissed the tip of her nose. “There are lots of ways to make love that don’t involve our dicks sliding inside your pussy.”
Emily flushed a deep shade of crimson and she looked past Noah to the fireplace.
“Em,” Noah whispered. He watched as her gaze slowly returned to his. “Stop being embarrassed by words. I won’t talk like this about our sex in front of
anyone but you and Gabe. But there is nothing wrong with calling things what they are. And it’s a hell of a turn on for us, I gotta tell you. Guys are visual. Paint us a picture with words and we’re good to go.”
“I’ll try,” she laughed helplessly. “But so far, it’s pretty embarrassing.”
“No it’s not,” he growled and brushed his lips across hers again. “It’s sexy as hell, and you know it.”
“Noah, I swear to God. Put a leash on it. Now!” Gabriel insisted.
Emily took pity on him and she dipped below Noah’s arms to escape his hold on her. She began opening cabinets to find the plates and utensils they would need. Then she set the table and began pulling out the condiments. She smiled when she saw Noah dropping slices of bread into the toaster to help Gabriel out.
They moved with such familiarity and ease around each other, and she knew that it could never have been any other way for the three of them. Some things just were. And this bond they’d formed, this friendship they’d cultivated, was one of them. Adding in the ability to physically express what lay within their hearts, well… that was just the icing on the cake in her mind.
“Earth to Emily,” Noah said, as he snapped his fingers in front of her face. “Ready to eat?”
She shook herself and realized both men were standing beside the table with a hand on a chair. They were watching her with bemused grins. She nodded and stepped forward. Gabe pulled her chair back and once she was seated, he took his place beside her. Noah dropped into the chair at the end of the table on her right, and once again Emily found herself cocooned between the two of them.
Noah placed a little extra meat on her plate and she glanced at him, wondering why he was adding to her normal portion.
“Gotta keep up your strength,” Noah smirked. “We’re a lot to take on.”
“Stop it,” she fussed half-heartedly.
Emily speared a sausage link and waved it at him. Then she slowly closed her lips around the end and toyed with the food for a few seconds, running her tongue up and down its length. She noted that they had both paused and were watching her every move. Emily smiled and bit off the tip of the link, and then happily chewed it while she grinned at Noah.
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