Finally, it’s important to remember that while these organizations offer help, they can’t always offer solutions. Much of the process by which problems are solved, or at least neutralized, comes from within the people who are grappling with them. These organizations work best when they activate something inside your mind, heart, or body: a sense that a solution is possible, the will to move forward with a different perspective, a renewed tenacity or hope.
ALCOHOL
Though I am not an alcoholic, I have known many people who are over the course of my life, and many of them have been helped and even saved by working with the following organizations. I am always moved when I hear stories from friends who have dedicated themselves to the 12-step program or found a truer sense of self by attending daily meetings. Above all, these programs help launch people on a journey to understanding themselves.
Alcoholics Anonymous
aa.org / 212-870-3400
Adult Children of Alcoholics
adultchildren.org / 562-595-7831
Al-Anon Family Groups
al-anon.alateen.org / 757-563-1600
DRUGS
Drugs have never been a big part of my life, but I have seen their destructive effects on people close to me, particularly my sister Margaux, and I know how prevalent drugs are in our society—both illegal drugs and prescription medications. Like alcohol programs, organizations dealing with drug addiction promote mindful and conscious living.
Narcotics Anonymous
na.org / 818-773-9999
MENTAL HEALTH
General mental health is something of a misnomer: most mental health issues, even if they seem general at first, are made up of many specifics. But if you have a problem, you have to start somewhere. I am very connected with the following organizations: I have spoken to groups under the auspices of NAMI and McLean Hospital (where I am an honorary board member), and I try to embrace any and all organizations that promote help and understanding. Again, these groups aren’t panaceas. Your needs (or the needs of family members) may point you toward one rather than the other. But once you have located the right environment, it’s more than a relief—it’s a lifesaver.
National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI)
nami.org / 800-950-6264
National Institute of Mental Health
nimh.nih.gov / 866-615-6464
McLean Hospital
mcleanhospital.org / 800-333 0338
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration
findtreatment.samhsa.gov / 877-SAMHSA -7
OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DISORDER
When I was a little girl, I had behaviors that helped me keep the world orderly. They were good for me until they got too ritualistic, until my own identity began to be compromised by the habits and compulsions. In my case, I overcame some of the habits on my own, but others have OCD that can’t be fully controlled without assistance. OCD can be a mental illness, and in those cases it needs to be treated like all others, with compassion and understanding.
International OCD Foundation
iocdf.org / 617-973-5801
DEPRESSION AND MOOD DISORDERS
Depression is more common than anyone realizes. Many people are afflicted by it, at various levels of severity, and most of them don’t address the problem because of the accompanying stigma and the fear that admitting depression will cost them jobs or relationships. That’s where these organizations come in: they give people a place to start talking about it and dealing with it, to take a closer look at mental imbalances with compassion and purpose.
Anxiety and Depression Association of America
adaa.org / 240-485-1001
Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance
dbsalliance.org / 800-826-3632
Families for Depression Awareness
familyaware.org / 781-890-0220
BRAIN
When we experience emotional problems, they leave a trace in our brain, and Brain Wave Optimization has been an enormous help to me in my life dealing with depression, obsession, and childhood trauma. The program works to balance the hemispheres of the brain through sound and to create new neural pathways. What I love about Brainwave Optimization is its elegance and simplicity. Your brain hears itself in real time and balances via feedback. There are no pills. There are no long conversations or negotiations. The process, which is called allostasis, is like a kind of massage or chiropractic correction, but for the brain.
Brainwave Optimization
www.brainstatetech.com
SUICIDE
Suicide is widely misunderstood, because there is no rhyme or reason to it, no clear line dividing suicidal ideation from intentionally failed attempts from successful attempts. A suicide can be planned carefully in advance or can be the result of one panicked day. I have worked personally with the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, but all of these groups do their best both to help people with suicidal thoughts and to support the families who have lost their loved ones to suicide.
American Foundation for Suicide Prevention
afsp.org / 800-273-8255
American Association of Suicidology
suicidology.org / 800-273-8255
Suicide Prevention Resource Center
sprc.org / 800-273-8255
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
suicidepreventionlifeline.org / 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
Suicide Awareness Voices of Education (SAVE)
save.org / 952-946-7998
CANCER
Cancer has hit close to home for me repeatedly—it dominated the last two decades of my mother’s life, and it affected my husband in early middle age. I believe that people need to concern themselves intimately not only with the medical aspects of cancer prevention and treatment but with the lifestyle component. I highly recommend that people supplement traditional medical treatments with holistic methods, and investigate Eastern as well as Western methodologies for healing. I also urge people to visit sites such as Food Matters (foodmatters.tv) to read up on diets that assist with cancer treatment.
American Cancer Society
cancer.org / 800-227-2345
CancerCare
cancercare.org / 800-813-4673
Cancer Support Community
cancersupportcommunity.org / 888-793-9355
Burzynski Clinic Advanced Alternative Cancer Treatment
burzynskiclinic.com / 713-335-5697
Caregiver Action Network
caregiveraction.org / 202-772-5050
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
Domestic violence affects so many people, and it can take many forms. These organizations are concerned primarily with the safety of spouses and children in violent families. No one should hesitate to seek help.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline
thehotline.org / 800-799-7233
Children’s Safety Network
childrenssafetynetwork.org
FOOD AND EATING DISORDERS
My obsession with food began in childhood and lasted for many decades. If I had known of organizations like this, I would have dealt with things earlier and in a healthier manner.
National Eating Disorders Association
nationaleatingdisorders.org / 800-931-2237
Overeaters Anonymous
oa.org / 505-891-2664
YOGA
Yoga, of course, is a Hindu spiritual and ascetic discipline that involves breath control, simple meditation, and the adoption of specific bodily postures and is widely practiced for health and relaxation. From personal experience, I can attest to the value of the practice—and, more to the point, to the joy of the practice. It’s a way to process the rush of the world, to learn to trust yourself, and to find a great sense of balance whether times are good or bad. I encourage you and your family to explore different types and aspects of yoga through classes in your local community, online resources, and instructional videos. Yoga is an important part of my commitment to living mindfully, awake, aware,
and connected inside and out.
ALTERNATIVE HEALING MODALITIES
These resources share some of the same priorities as yoga: they seek to reduce stress, increase focus, unite body and mind, and engage with Eastern as well as Western spiritual practices.
David Lynch Foundation
davidlynchfoundation.org / 641-209-6404
National Ayurvedic Medical Association
ayurvedanama.org / 800-669-8914
Center for East-West Medicine UCLA
cewm.med.ucla.edu/international
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
THANK YOU TO: Tracy Columbus—you have been my lighthouse in this journey of storytelling; you are a beautiful and gracious human that I am proud to call my friend. Ben Greenman, for hearing my voice and being humble and cool about it. Heather Reinhardt, for keeping my life together. Judith Regan, for having the foresight to see this project as important and Lucas Wittmann, for negotiating the waters of many opinions. Lisa Erspamer, had you not said I needed to tell my story, none of this would have happened.
Thank you Mommy and Daddy, I know you did your best and I will always love you. Thank you Margot, you suffered greatly and I see that now. Muffet, who still sees the world from a place of love and acceptance, you are always stunning to me. Thank you to everyone in my life that has had an impact on my journey, I am grateful.
And of course, Mr. Bubba.
Author photograph © Chris Baldwin
MARIEL HEMINGWAY is an Academy Award–nominated actor, author, healthy lifestyle brand founder, mother, and mental health advocate who speaks around the world. She lives in California.
65 Bleecker Street
New York, NY 10012
Copyright © 2015 Mariel Hemingway
All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form whatsoever. For information address Regan Arts Subsidiary Rights Department, 65 Bleecker Street, New York, NY 10012.
First Regan Arts hardcover edition, April 2015.
Library of Congress Control Number: 2014955526
ISBN 978-1-941393-23-9
ISBN 978-1-941393-75-8 (eBook)
Interior design by Alex Camlin
Jacket design by Richard Ljoenes
Jacket art by © Sebastian Kim/Management + Artists
Front cover photograph © Sebastian Kim / Management + Artists
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