“Good morning.” Josh’s low voice came from the doorway.
“Good morning,” she replied, her gaze firmly on the pan. She certainly wasn’t going to run away just because he showed up.
She heard his step as he crossed to the stove and poured himself a cup of coffee. He didn’t move away, but she refused to glance at him. She concentrated on the eggs, they were almost finished. She strained to hear any sound from the yard, but the men still hadn’t started for the house.
“Molly, about last night—”
“Excuse me, I need that platter.” She carried the heavy pan over to the platter she'd warmed. Scraping the eggs onto it, she placed it in the center of the table and risked a glance at the clock. The toaster popped up and she buttered the slices, adding them to the stack she had kept warm in the oven. Outside, she could hear the murmur of voices.
“Molly,” Josh said.
She put the toast on the table, checked that everything was there, then scooted around Josh and headed for the hallway.
“Where are you going?”
“I’ve eaten,” she lied, hurrying to escape before he could stop her.
She almost ran to her room, closing the door and leaning against it.
There, she’d done it. The first hurdle, their first meeting after last night. She hadn’t handled it as calmly as she would have liked, but it was the best she could do.
The knock came suddenly and unexpected.
“Open the door, Molly.”
“Go away.” She pushed away and crossed to the window. What did he want from her, blood?
Josh turned the knob and pushed the door open, hesitating in the opening.
“Molly, I want to talk to you.”
“There’s nothing to talk about. Go eat your breakfast.”
“Did you really eat?”
“I’ll get something later. You better get it now, while it’s hot,” she said, fiddling with the curtain.
She heard his steps cross her room and tensed. She was not surprised when he put his hand on her shoulder and gently turned her around. His finger beneath her chin raised it until she looked at him.
It hurt. She loved him, had just discovered it, and he didn’t believe her. He thought she thought like Jeannie, wanting him for his money.
“I’m sorry for the tears,” Josh said softly.
“Josh, if you have something to say, say it, then get out. I don’t need any false sympathy,” she said, anger starting to build. So she made a fool of herself. Only her pride was really damaged. She didn’t regret loving him, only that she had voiced her feelings.
“Last night things got out of hand. We were supposed to be doing research for your book.”
She nodded. What a joke that turned out to be. Her book was the farthest thing from her mind right now.
She wished he would stop touching her. She couldn’t think when he touched her.
“So maybe feelings got exaggerated,” he continued.
She nodded. Just leave.
He sighed. “I’m not making things any better, am I?”
She shook her head.
“Come down to breakfast.”
“No. I’ll eat when you go out to work.” She stepped back, breaking contact, able to breathe again.
Josh started to say something, thought better of it and turned to leave.
Molly followed his progress from the sound of his steps. Taking a deep breath, she turned to gaze out the window. Even now she hoped he would say something to show he wasn’t totally indifferent to her.
And he hadn’t.
As soon as the men left, she’d call the agency and ask Mrs. Montgomery to send a replacement as soon as she found one.
It was after nine by the time Josh finally left the house. Molly was starving. She’d been up most of the night, and only nibbled a couple pieces of bacon while she’d prepared breakfast. She went to the kitchen, stacked the dirty dishes and ran water in the sink.
Quickly she prepared herself a small omelet. But once it sat on her plate, she toyed with the food.
She wished she could turn the clock back to yesterday, do things differently.
For one thing, she would never have admitted falling in love. And knowing now what she should have known then, she would never have permitted Josh to kiss her.
How had she ever thought she would be able to walk away unscathed after such mind-boggling kisses? After the first one she should have run far and fast.
Once the kitchen was straight, she went to the office to call Mrs. Montgomery.
“Hello, dear. Are you calling about a new position?” Mrs. Montgomery asked once Molly had identified herself.
“Yes, I guess I am. Also, I wanted you to look for another housekeeper for the Rafter C.”
“Mr. Hart already called that order in earlier this morning. I’m searching, but as I told you when I referred you to the place, he’s not an easy man to please. I was surprised he said you could stay until a replacement could be found.”
Josh had already called to have her replaced. The knowledge pierced her.
She tried to keep her voice level, all the while wanting to slam down the receiver and scream in hurt and disappointment.
He couldn’t wait for her to write her book and leave, he had taken steps to find her replacement as soon as possible.
“... anything earlier, do you still wish to leave before I find a replacement for the ranch?” Mrs. Montgomery said.
“What? Yes, I want to leave if you find anything else for me.”
She refused stay a day longer than she needed to.
But until something else turned up, she'd have to remain. She needed the money. And a place to stay.
“Very well, Miss Forrester, I’ll call if I find anything suitable.”
Molly had to be satisfied with that. She knew Mrs. Montgomery didn’t think highly of her work skills. And the woman was right. But how could she show her she could do a job competently with her track record?
Turning to her computer, she sat down to work. She wasn’t going to worry about doing the job at the Rafter C to Josh’s exacting standards. He’d already made his decision. He didn’t want her here. He could have at least let her be the one to leave.
Reading about the characters she had conceived, she soon lost sight of the problems that plagued her. She had to get them going so she could finish the book and send it off.
When the phone rang, Molly glanced up. It was time to take a break, she’d been at it all morning. Glancing at the clock, she froze. Past time to prepare lunch. She saved her work and reached for the phone.
Molly flew into the kitchen a few minutes later. It was almost time for the men to come in and she hadn’t started lunch. The call from Josh’s sister had taken far longer than she had expected.
She scrambled around to cut the ham and roast beef, slather mayonnaise on the bread. She heard the horses and the voices. Hurrying, she made a dozen and started over. She could fix the second round while they ate the first. In seconds she had enough to start and smiled brightly when they began filtering in.
“Missed you at breakfast,” Billy said easily, scanning her up and down as he liked to do to tease.
“I ate early. I’ll have more sandwiches ready in only a few minutes. Help yourselves to the tea and coffee.” She turned back to the counter, began the process all over again.
Josh walked in and sat down without saying a word. He began to eat.
Ignoring him was easy with the other men present and Molly began to relax. She joked with Billy and Jack, filled up their plates again and again and made sure everyone had enough to eat. She refused to sit but kept busy running back and forth so no one commented on the fact.
“Slow down, girl, you’re going to knock yourself out,” Lance drawled at one point, flicking his gaze back and forth between Molly and Josh.
“I’m fine. Just a bit behind.”
“Daydreaming again?” Josh asked in an obvious bad mood.
“Actual
ly I got held up by a call from your sister. She said to tell you she and her husband are coming for a few days and you’re to be nice to Jake,” Molly replied primly, refilling Lance’s ice tea.
“You’ll like Brianna, she’s stayed here before and always pitches in,” Lance said with a smile.
“She sounded nice on the phone.”
Molly looked just to the left of Josh. “Which room should I prepare for them?”
“The one across from you. Brianna can help with the meals while she’s here.”
“I got the impression from her call that she and Jake are looking forward to riding a lot.”
“Can you manage two more for meals?”
She shrugged and opened another bag of chips and handed them to Pete. “I’m sure I can manage.” For as long as I stay, she wanted to add.
How she hoped Mrs. Montgomery found something for her before she found a replacement housekeeper.
She’d give anything to leave before Josh asked.
Lunch seemed to last forever. If she even glanced Josh’s way, she saw his gaze on her. She tried to listen to the banter between the cowboys, wistfully remembering a time when it had all been new and exciting.
Now she wanted to leave before she made a bigger fool of herself over the suspicious owner of the ranch. She wanted to turn her back on the Rafter C and any promise she'd once imagined and find another place where she would keep to herself, do her job and find relaxation in her writing. She should have learned from Marc. Josh had merely completed the lesson.
Love and marriage and happy-ever-after were only true in books. She’d not forget that in the future.
Chapter Ten
Molly saved another chapter when Josh walked into the office late that afternoon. She glanced up guiltily and checked the time. Good grief, she should have started dinner a half hour ago. Rising in panic, she shoved in her chair and turned to leave.
“Letter for you.” Josh moved behind his desk and sat down, tossing an envelope across the wide expanse.
Molly hesitated, puzzled.
“No one knows where I am,” she murmured, crossing to the desk. Her old address had been crossed out and Josh’s ranch address penciled in by the post office. Her heart sank, the letter was from her father.
“Thanks.”
She picked it up and slid it into her back pocket. She'd have to read it, but later, after dinner.
Turning, she hurried to the kitchen. She planned a meat loaf for dinner, but there wasn’t time, now, to prepare it. It would have to be hamburgers.
At least Josh wouldn’t suspect she’d forgotten about the meal. She'd have everything ready when the men came in.
Dinner proved to be strained. Molly did her best to appear carefree and unconcerned, but every instinct was trained on Josh. He ate, took no part in the general conversation, and his attitude caused puzzled glances from the men.
As soon as he finished eating, he left for the office.
One or two raised eyebrows were all that the cowboys allowed, but she knew everyone was curious about the reason for Josh’s attitude.
She washed the dishes. Then, instead of heading back to the office to work on her book, she went out front and walked slowly down the long driveway. The early evening air was still balmy and the breeze that blew from the west carried a hint of the coolness from the mountains. It was pleasant and she felt a certain peace seep through her.
Now was as good a time as any to read the letter from her father. She pulled it from her back pocket, feeling the tension rise just seeing his dark, bold handwriting. What was he going to try now? Why did he feel he had the right to run his own life and hers? She slid her finger beneath the envelope flap and withdrew two pages.
He demanded she return home, forget her foolishness and settle down. He wanted to know where she was, why the phone had been disconnected. He ended saying Marc had asked after her and if she were at all smart she’d snap up such a fine man.
Rereading the letter, Molly searched for any indication that her father wanted to know how she was, where she was. To see if he had any concern for her feelings in the matter, to find a trace of curiosity for her own desires and plans for the future. Nothing of the kind. It was a demand for return, clear and simple.
She sighed and tucked the letter back into the envelope and slid it back into her pocket. Nothing had changed. Not that she had expected it to, but she always hoped that just once her father would ask about her and then listen to what she had to say. Listen and respect her own views, her own feelings, her own dreams.
By the time Molly reached the main highway, it had grown dark. She recognized the main road with a start of surprise. She had been daydreaming, again, and hadn’t realized how far she’d walked. It was a mile back to the house. And it would be pitch dark before she covered half the distance. There were no streetlights, no traffic to provide some illumination. She'd be lucky to stay on the blacktop and not wander off into the barbed-wire fencing.
With a tsk of disgust, she turned and walked quickly back the way she’d come.
How could she have let herself get caught up in daydreams again? She really needed to get a better grasp of reality. Save her daydreaming for when she sat before the computer and composed her story.
In only seconds she saw headlights. Then the truck pulled up beside her and Josh’s looked out from the window.
“Get in, I’ll take you back.”
“No, thanks.” She could still see the road and if she walked in the center couldn’t she—
“Molly, get into the truck before I get out and put you in.” His tone brooked no refusal.
She hesitated a second, long enough to assuage her pride, then conceded. She didn’t want to walk all the way back in total darkness.
Once inside, Josh turned the truck around on the narrow road and roared toward the house.
“Bad news in your letter?” he asked.
Molly ignored his comment. She wanted to tell him it was none of his business. How would he feel if she parroted his words to him?
“Molly!”
“Not bad news. Just the usual stuff from my father. He wants to dictate and I refuse. I don’t know why he persists.” When would he get it through his head she was grown and on her own? And perfectly capable of running her own life.
Well, she qualified honestly, maybe not perfectly capable or she wouldn’t be in the fix she found herself now. But it was her life and her mistakes and she didn’t want anyone interfering.
“He doesn’t know where you are, does he? My address was forwarded from the post office.”
“I didn’t tell him where I was going. Not that it is any of your business, either,” she said tartly.
“Call him, Molly. Tell him you’re here and give him the address and phone number. Let him know you're safe. You owe him that much.”
“I don’t believe you have any more right to dictate my life than my father does. Less, actually. Butt out, Josh,” she said, turning in the dark cab and glaring at him. She wished he could see her.
“I’m not dictating anything. I’m only telling you to call the man, let him know you're safe.” It was a reasonable response. Why was she trying to make more of it than what it was? Was she looking for a fight? For a moment Josh was ready to offer her one.
“I’ll take it under consideration,” she said through gritted teeth. If that wasn’t an order, she didn’t know what was.
“Call him tonight.”
“I believe I know how to run my own life.”
“I don’t think you have a clue,” Josh snapped as he jerked the pickup to a stop and killed the engine.
“I certainly do. I’m managing just fine.”
“From where I’m sitting, it doesn’t look like it.” He reached across the bench seat and latched his hands onto her upper arms, dragging her across until she practically sat in his lap. He lowered his face until he could see hers in the dim light spilling from the kitchen window.
“Molly, you can’t stay
here. I’ve already called Mrs. Montgomery and asked for a new housekeeper.”
“I know. I called her myself to suggest it and she told me you’d beaten me to it. I’ll be going soon.”
“And just what are you going to do? You didn’t make it in the office job, nor the store, nor the fast food, nor here.”
Had Mrs. Montgomery shared all that with him? Wasn't there some kind of employment agency confidentiality?
“I’m doing better as a housekeeper. I’ll look for another position like this one. Don’t you worry about it. Maybe I didn’t suit you, but I’ll suit some other family, and still have time to write my book. If I can just get it published, I’ll have enough money to live on until I write a second. That’s what I really want to do.”
He remained silent for a long moment, surprised at the fear that churned up at her declaration she’d find another housekeeper job.
He didn’t want her cooking for some other man. He didn’t want some other rancher teaching her how to kiss and helping her do research for her blasted book.
Yet she couldn’t stay. She imagined herself in love with him. There was nothing he could do but send her away before she became a nuisance.
When he fell in love, he wanted a woman like his mother. Someone who kept the house immaculate, cooked delicious, bountiful meals, and had time to take care of any children they might have.
He didn’t want some flighty, scatterbrained woman who daydreamed most of the day away, who couldn’t cook beyond basics and who thought nothing of flirting with the cowhands.
Yet as she stared at him so defiantly in the faint light, his heart turned over.
She was so pretty, her eyes wide and luminous, her hair softly swirling around her shoulders, her lips tempting. He drew in a deep breath and took in her own special scent—roses.
He wanted to push her away and order her to call her father. Maybe the man could get her to go home and take care of her.
But his arms didn’t work that way, they were drawing her closer. His mouth didn’t voice the thoughts that he knew he should say, instead it covered hers and kissed her long and deep.
Reckless Heart Page 13